Death In Her Eyes (Children of the Fallen Book 1)

by ERIN BEDFORD

  It couldn’t be a coincidence.

  But it didn’t make sense. The Watcher? Me? No way.

  I shook my head in disbelief, pushing away from the table and waving my hands by my head. "You're wrong. It can't be me." I gave a bitter laugh and turned back to him. "I can't even have visions like a normal seer. All I see is death and destruction."

  "And in their wake, destruction and death shall fall around them like rain. That will be the bringer of light. The savior who will cleanse the world or destroy it." Dex tapped the book with his finger once more. "It's all here, Elle. You aren't here because the angels want to kill you like the rest of us." He took a step toward me, pain in his expression as he explained. "You're here so that Lucifer can make sure that you are on our side when everything goes down. Your dad, Azazel, they didn't want you to know. They wanted you to figure out your powers on your own." He took my hands in his, but this time, I was too numb by the realization of what he said to even react to the vision. "The mark your dad put on you was to hide you from the angels as well as keep your powers in check until they were ready."

  I stared down at my hand where his thumb traced where the mark had been. It had all been a lie. From the very beginning, he hadn't loved her. He hadn't even tried to save her. He only came around to make sure that his precious weapon was where it was supposed to be.

  My chest heaved rapidly as I drew in short breaths of air. Something inside of me built. It roared and raged, and I feared if it didn't come out, I'd burn up from the insides.

  "Let me go." I pulled my hands away from Dex, but he held on tight, locking eyes with me. "I need to...I don't know what's—"

  Understanding crossed Dex’s face, and he pulled me close. "Let it go. You can't hurt me."

  I didn’t understand what he meant, but I held on to him tight, my eyes squeezed closed as the ball inside of me wound tighter and tighter, until finally, it broke.

  Wind licked at my skin, and the scent of burnt wood filled my nose. A weight on my chest had lifted, and with it, I pulled away from Dex, opening my eyes. Gasping, I jumped back.

  Flames flickered all around us, but they weren't hot, and they didn't even burn. For a moment, I thought the flames had come from Dex, but then I knew. I knew it had been me.

  I'd done this. The fire stayed relatively close to us, only scorching the floorboards.

  "I'm only keeping it contained," Dex answered my unspoken question.

  "How?" I gaped at him. "How did you know?"

  Giving me a sad smile, Dex brushed the back of his hand against my cheek where tears came off with it. "Because I'd reacted the same way when I found out that's what they'd done to me."

  "To you?"

  He huffed a laugh. "Except I failed. I wasn't what they wanted, and so they tried again. With you."

  Still a bit dumbfounded, I stared at him while my mind whirled. They'd made me. On purpose. And not even the one time. They'd done it to Dex too. What kind of fucked up person would do this?

  But they weren't people. They were angels.

  I SPENT THE rest of Saturday and Sunday going through the books Dex left me. Ayden had come by a few times to check on me, but I reassured her that I was fine. Just got some upsetting news.

  Thankfully, it was enough to keep her from checking up on me the rest of the weekend. There was so much on my mind that I just couldn’t handle all the questions and energy that came with socializing.

  Dex, the saint, came by with food periodically throughout the day. He seemed to understand that I needed time alone. Of course he would, though. He’d been me not too long ago. Dex knew exactly how I was feeling right now.

  The books didn’t have a whole lot of information that was useful to me. It was basically filled with a lot of doom and gloom. The prophecy didn’t say who the Watcher was, only that they would see the end of times and be able to change it based on their will. I hadn’t changed a vision in my life.

  Until...the other day.

  Never in my life had I ever changed a vision I had from coming true. Not even when my neighbor’s dog was about to be run over by a car. It had been so small. It should have been simple to keep it from happening, and yet, my yelling for the cute little Pomeranian to watch out had only caused the dog to rush into the street as it happily ran toward me.

  And yet, I had been able to stop Dharma from dumping the milk shake on Cass. In truth, that could have gone better. I still hadn’t been able to salvage my favorite jeans because of it.

  I still had so many questions and not enough answers. I knew I would have to talk to my dad or Azazel to get them, but I wasn’t going to hang around her office waiting for him to show. I’d done enough waiting on my dad in my life.

  Chewing on my lower lip, I considered what I could do while I waited. I couldn’t stay in my room forever. I’d already missed morning classes. Everyone was probably talking shit about me now, like how I couldn’t bear to show my face after I ruined the weekend for everyone.

  Like it was even my fault. Dharma, of course, got none of the blame.

  I sighed and stood. Figuring I could get a smoke in before I faced everyone at lunch, I grabbed my pack of cigarettes and shoved it in my back pocket. My hand automatically went for my cellphone, but I then remembered I still didn’t have it. Something else I’d have to talk to my dad about.

  Soon.

  I walked out of my room with my head held high. I wasn’t about to let anyone make me feel bad about myself. None of this weekend had been my fault. Dharma was the one to blame. If she hadn’t had such a chip on her shoulder about the whole putting her in a coma thing, then none of this would have happened. Which was also her fault for putting her nose where it didn’t belong.

  There were a few stragglers in the hallway on my way outside, but most of them gave me one look and hurried the other way. I suppose fear was better than ridicule. If I had to choose between the two of them... After all, I was used to people being afraid of me.

  Determined not to let it bother me, I forced myself not to walk faster and to keep an even unhurried pace. It wasn’t until I reached the courtyard full of statues that I finally relaxed.

  My boots thudded against the stone walkway as I made my way to the weeping angel. If anyone knew my pain, it would be that guy.

  Wasting no time in lighting up, I breathed a big exhale of sweet sweet relief.

  Azazel hadn’t told me when my dad would be showing up. The anxiety of not knowing and waiting for him to appear so I could give him a piece of my mind was agonizing. I’d stayed up most of the previous nights, practicing what I would say to him.

  Did you ever even love Mom? Did you love me? Why? Why? Why?

  That was the million-dollar question.

  Why?

  For power? To finally take down the angels and rule...Heaven? Earth? I didn’t know enough about celestial politics to know what the end game actually was. I only knew what those books Dex gave me told me.

  The Watcher would see the end of the world and change it to their will. With me being the Watcher.

  I snorted to myself.

  It was kind of ironic when I thought about it.

  The Watcher. Really? Me?

  I’d done nothing but watch the people I knew, the people I loved, and those I didn’t die over and over again until I didn’t want to leave my house. The fact that my entire existence depended on me watching the rest of the world burn was just plain hilarious.

  But I wasn’t just a watcher now, was I?

  My mind drifted to the library and what had happened with Dex. I’d created flames. Me! I’d never thought I’d be able to do anything like that in my life, and yet...

  I pulled my cigarette from my mouth and stared at the tip, willing it to burn like I’d seen Dex do before.

  After a long minute of staring, I huffed in annoyance, muttering to myself about being ridiculous.

  “It takes practice.”

  My head jerked up, and I half expected to see Dex there as he usually was, but
the voice came from outside the metal fence.

  “Cass?” My brows rose with the pitch of my voice.

  “In the flesh.” Cass chuckled, wrapping his hands around the bars of the fence. His golden blond hair was pulled back today in a small ponytail at the nape of his neck. He wore a worn out dark brown leather jacket with matching boots, and his jeans hugged that fabulous ass. What surprised me was the motorcycle sitting a few paces away from the fence.

  “How did you even get here?” I finally asked once I stopped gaping, then I realized what he’d said. “Wait, you know about—”

  “Angels, magic, and all that?” Cass arched a brow and smirked. “Well, yeah.”

  “You said you didn’t believe in that crap.” I narrowed my eyes at him in accusation.

  Cass cocked his head to the side. “I lied.”

  I stared at him for a long minute and then asked slowly, “Who are you?”

  He opened his mouth to answer, but I stopped him.

  “And no lies. Fuck knows, I’ve been lied to enough these days.” I took a long drag from my cigarette before dropping it to the ground to stomp it out.

  Cass chuckled once more. “Alright, then. My name is Cassiel, but my friends call me Cass. And I’m an—”

  “Angel,” I finished for him, crossing my arms over my chest. “Yeah, I got it.”

  He arched a brow.

  “Every angel has the stupid -el at the end of their name. God putting his little stamp on all of his creations. At least, the ones he cares about.”

  Cass seemed surprised by my knowledge. “What about Lucifer? His name doesn’t end in -el.”

  I walked slowly over to the gate and stopped just out of touching distance. “Trick question. His name wasn’t originally Lucifer. It was changed after he fell from heaven. Before, it was Samael.”

  “Ah, so they do teach you lot something in there.” Cass smiled, pleased at my answer.

  Clicking my tongue, I shifted just a bit closer. “Yep. They also watch your every movement and put little shock collars on you, so you don’t go wandering off.” I showed him the bracelet on my wrist that I hadn’t had a chance to get Azazel to take off yet.

  Cass huffed a laugh.

  “What?”

  Shaking his head, Cass held onto the bars and leaned away so he was almost swinging on them. “Nothing, just for a bunch of rebels they sure do have control issues.”

  I snorted. “Tell me about it.”

  “Then why don’t you leave?” Cass stopped swinging and locked eyes with me. “Just walk out the front door?”

  I waved the bracelet in response. “I have this for one, which I hope to get off today, but secondly...” I reached out and touched the fence, my hand bouncing off of it before I could even reach it. “Can’t get through the barrier without a faculty member to lower it.”

  “Ah.” Cass leaned close and placed his forehead against the metal bars. “If you could get the barrier down and that bracelet off, would you?”

  “Would I what?”

  “Leave.”

  I gave him a suspicious look before getting as close to the fence as I could. “In a heartbeat.”

  Though, as I said the words, guilt tugged at my heart. There were reasons to stay. Several in fact, but my dad’s betrayal was hard to ignore. He didn’t even give me a choice in the matter. He just picked what side I’d be on and kept me in the dark so I couldn’t make up my own mind.

  Shifting the conversation, I backed up a few steps. “Don’t your kind want to kill me?”

  Cass gave me a panty melting smile, tucking his hands into the pockets of his jeans. “Why ever would I want to do that?”

  “Because I’m an abomination,” I supplied for him. “At least, that’s what Michael called me.”

  He laughed. “Michael has a big ole stick up his ass. Not all of us think like that. Besides...” His lips curled up ever so slightly. “You’re the Watcher.”

  “So, you knew who I was when we met?”

  Shrugging a shoulder, Cass gave me a knowing look. “Perhaps I had my suspicions and all I had to do to confirm them was to follow your little group of misfits back here.”

  I shrugged. “That’s just what I was told.”

  “Well...you can’t believe everything you hear.” He cocked a brow and smirked, then paused and angled his head to the side. “Well, I better be going. I’ll see you around, Watcher.”

  I unabashedly watched the way his pants hugged his ass as Cass walked back to his motorcycle. He threw his leg over it and winked at me before the engine roared to life and he drove away.

  Not even a minute later, Ayden came outside. “Hey, there you are. I’ve been looking all over for you.”

  I glanced away from where Cass had disappeared from. “I’m right here. What’s up?”

  She gave me a curious look but then said, “Your dad’s here.”

  Well, that was convenient. I darted a look back to the fence, wondering if Cass knew that my dad had arrived.

  “You okay?” Ayden stepped up beside me. “I know you’ve had a rough weekend, but things will look up soon. Trust me. Plus, your dad’s here.” She smiled brightly at me. “That’s got to count for something, right?”

  I didn’t remind Ayden that my dad and I had a strained relationship at best, but now that I knew he’d been using me this whole time, I wasn’t exactly sure what we had anymore. Instead, I forced a smile to my face and nodded. “Right. Let’s go. I want to get this thing off me and get my phone back.”

  “Ugh.” Ayden made a face at my bracelet. “I got that thing taken off the moment I got back. I don’t know how you kept it on all weekend.”

  I lifted a shoulder and dropped it, frowning. “I had a lot on my mind.”

  She nodded. “I get ya. Dharma was such a bitch at the diner. Then on the bus, she spent the whole time talking shit about you to anyone and everyone who would listen. You’re so lucky you got to ride back with Dex.” Ayden sighed happily, as if she would have enjoyed it a bit more than I did.

  “Yeah, lucky,” I muttered as we walked into the school. “And don’t worry about Dharma. She’s just an attention whore.” I told her with a shake of my head. “There are more important things to worry about.”

  “Yeah, you’re right. Like that hottie, Cass, from town.” Ayden clasped her hands in front of her, letting out a dreamy giggle. “I could think of a thing or two I’d like him to study, if you know what I mean.”

  I winced. I did.

  Not wanting to burst Ayden’s bubble, I kept silent on the whole Cass was actually an angel bit. At least, it did explain why I was so drawn to him. The whole celestial attraction apparently worked both ways on Nephilim. Too bad it didn’t make my dad any more likable. I didn’t know how I was going to get through this conversation without burning the whole place to ash.

  A PART OF me felt like I was walking to a guillotine. Each step that I took along the hallway was like a punch to my gut. Everyone stared and whispered as I walked by, no doubt talking about this weekend.

  I tried to hold back an eye roll, but it was oh so hard.

  Ayden followed along beside me, chatting normally about what happened while I was gone, what I’d missed in class, and so on. Her voice became background noise, and I stopped pretending to listen to her as Azazel’s office came into view.

  “Hey,” I interrupted Ayden, placing a hand on her arm. “I just want you to know that whatever happens, I’m glad you became my friend.”

  Then I did something I never did.

  I hugged her.

  Laughing slightly, Ayden hugged me back. “I don’t know what brought this on, but I’m glad you’re my friend too.”

  Releasing her, I walked over to the office door and knocked. Azazel’s voice answered, telling me to come in. I twisted slightly back to Ayden and gave her a small wave and smile.

  Confusion covered her face, but she returned both.

  Entering Azazel’s office, I saw my dad sitting on the couch I had woken up
on the first day here. I pushed back the need to run over to him and berate him with questions. I wasn’t a child. I wouldn’t get answers from these people by acting like one.

  Walking up to Azazel’s desk where she waited, I held my arm out. “Can you remove this please?”

  Azazel exchanged a look with my dad, and for a moment, I thought they weren’t going to do it. Then with a flick of her finger, the bracelet fell off.

  I kept the sigh of relief from coming out, but couldn’t resist rubbing my wrist where it had been.

  “Elle,” my dad began, standing from the couch to approach me. “I understand you wanted to speak to me.”

  I scanned him over in his pristine suit and jacket, noticing there wasn’t a mark on him. “You don’t even look like you’ve been in battle.”

  “I told you he was fine,” Azazel interjected with a disapproving frown. “Is that all you wanted him for? He has more important things to do than—”

  “Azazel.” My dad’s voice stopped her, his gaze sharp on the other angel. To me, his face softened. “Elle, what’s wrong? I heard you’ve been fighting? And you caused another student to go into a coma?”

  My jaw clenched tight, and I wanted to glare at Azazel for tattling, but knew it wouldn’t help me right now. “I’m not exactly the same as everyone else here, as you know.”

  He nodded in understanding. “Yes, I know, but you must try to get along with the others. You may need them in the future.”

  My fingers curled into fists, but I kept them down at my sides. I tried to keep my voice as neutral as possible as I bit out, “Fine. Can I have my phone back?”

  This time, my dad exchanged a look with Azazel and then gave me one of those looks parents do. The one that said, ‘I’m doing this for your own good, even if you hate me for it.’ How he even knew that look was beyond me. He’d never acted like a parent one day in his life.

  “Elle...Eleanor...” My dad sighed and placed his hands on my shoulders.

  A flash of something hit me, but not like my other visions. It was only a small hit. A flash of lightning and a wing. Nothing else. It’d be disappointing, except I’d never had a vision when touching my dad. Never. Not once.