To Come First

by J C Rae

  I think about what he’s asking and shrug. “I honestly don’t know. Maybe. I’d have to play around. I guess you’re wanting to know if I can shield you but still let your scent come thru so no one would know that you’re protected. Is that right?” He nods again. “Alpha Caden said something tonight about our ‘awful smell’ and he wanted to know how we masked it. I acted like it was a trick I knew from way back but I don’t think he bought it. When you got to the clearing, he noticed when the other wolves smell disappeared and I’m afraid that he may have connected you to it. I’m not sure because he didn’t say anything but I’d rather not put you in any more danger than you already are, if I can help it.”

  I tell him that I’ll see what I can do. I’ve never really tried because I didn’t realize I was blocking my scent. Of course, who else but wolves would know that? It’s also kind of creepy that this guy might come after me but there’s really nothing I can do about it right now.

  Uncle tells Bryce, Braxton, Randolf, and Luca that they are going to search the property to double check that everyone has left. Luca is already in his wolf form but the others aren’t. Randolf is the first to strip down and change, which he did while I wasn’t paying attention, thank you! Braxton comes over and slowly leans forward to hug me. I love that he’s giving me the chance to back away but I don’t. I grab ahold of him and squeeze, which seems to surprise him. In his mind I tell him Come back soon and stay safe. I’m going to go find something to eat and then maybe take a nap or something. Feel free to find me when you get back and we can hang out.

  His smile is bright as he starts stripping down. Not wanting to be a perv, I turn the other way and notice Bryce is watching me. My inner smartass comes out to play when he says nothing. “Did you have anything to say Bryce, or are you just going to keep being an ass and staring at me?”

  He still doesn’t say anything, but then he starts undressing to shift. I don’t turn quick enough and I catch a glimpse of his monster cock nestled in white blond curls. I instantly blush and he catches me, throwing a smirk my way. Instead of gracing him with a response, I turn and storm back towards the front door. Maybe I should take a cold shower and then find food. Gah, this whole naked thing is not normal but I guess I’m going to have to get used to it.

  ◆◆◆

  The rest of the day passes quickly. I didn’t get to take my nap but I did get some yummy food. Ms Alma is amazing and I’m pretty sure she’s spoiling me. Not that I’m going to complain. It’s almost dinner time before the guys get back and even then, they are still busy. Braxton told me that they were trying to figure out some new security so the Armstrong pack doesn’t sneak up on us again and would probably be awhile so I track down Timmy.

  Of course, he’s in the library. I haven’t really had a chance to visit the room but it’s amazing! It’s completely open in the center but the shelves go up thru all three stories. There are couches scattered around and they look like you could sink into them and get lost for a week. There's a couple others sitting around reading but for the most part, the area is empty.

  I absolutely love to read and get lost in a story. Honestly, I think that’s how I made thru all those years in foster homes. Getting out of my reality and into another kept me sane.

  Once I find a book that sounds good, I sit down to read with Timmy. He offered for us to go do something but I told him that we would relax for a little while and then I would start training him. His eyes went wide when I told him but he didn’t seem against it, so I’m gonna stick with it.

  After a couple hours, I close my book and stretch. Looking over at Timmy, I see that he is almost done with his book so I get up to put my book back. By the time I make it back to our couch, he is done and has put his book away too.

  He looks up at me with hope in his eyes. "So, are we going to train now? I've never done any type of training because everyone always said I was too young. I want to learn though so anything you will teach me would be amazing!"

  Looking down into his eyes, which are filled with a determination that I love seeing, I smile. "It's never too early to train. I think everyone should know enough to at least protect themselves if they need to because you never know when you might need to. Lead the way and lets get started."

  We head out of the library together and end up walking down the hallway. I've never been to this part of the house but I have only been here for a day and a half. Gosh, it feels like I've been here a lot longer than that!

  He stops in front of a door and takes a deep breath. It seems like he's working up the courage to open the door so I step around him and open it for us. He looks up and smiles at me before turning and walking in the room. Before I can even get completely inside, I hear someone yelling, "I told you pipsqueak. We aren't gonna train you so you might as well leave. We ain't got time for someone like you!"

  Timmy smile falters and that just plain pisses me off. Looking at the giant of a man that felt the need to loudly broadcast his opinions, I smirk. This is going to be fun!

  "Well, asshole, I don't think he asked for your help today so you can just go piss off and leave us alone."

  With that, I turn towards Timmy and drag him over the matt in the corner of the large gym. Looking around, I see a lot of new equipment that will come in handy but for now, I want to work on some self-defense moves and then run the track. Yes, I said the track because of course there are six lanes going around the entire outside of the gym! I'm smiling so big that Timmy gets a scared look on his face.

  While I'm looking around, the loud mouthed asshole decides to follow me. A couple of his friends must've decided to follow along with him too. Great, just what I wanted, a meet and greet full of testosterone fueled males!

  "Listen girl," he growls when he gets closer. "You and that outsider don't need to be in here causing trouble so I suggest you leave before I call our Alpha and have him make you. I'm sure he would agree with me so you should run along quickly before I get mad. I wouldn't want to hurt you."

  I look up to him, mostly because he is a good head taller than I am, and give him my best pissed off smirk. He seems confused so he must not be too bright. Anyone who knows me, knows that they should leave me alone when I get that look. Apparently, he doesn't understand. His followers seem more wary now that I'm not cowering in fear and take a step back.

  Jacob walks thru the door right at that second and looks around, seeing us immediately and noticing the tension. He heads towards us and hollers, "Mac, leave her alone or you’re not only gonna piss off the Alpha but also the twins. Don't you know who she is?"

  By the time he quits talking, he has stepped up beside me and crossed his arms. His support seems to make the already wary bystanders back away even further. Mac, however, didn't seem to get the memo. "Are you sticking up for these outsiders?"

  Jacob calmly nods his head. "Yes, I am. Mac, wasn't your son part of the group that got kidnapped today?" Mac nods his head so he continues, "Were you aware that it was Ash here that protected those kids. Well, actually, she protected all of us in the clearing, including Alpha Carl, so that we had no one hurt more than some bruises. She got to those kids before anyone else could and helped Randolf usher them back to the house. Then, Timmy here met her at the door to take those same scared kids to the safe room and watch over them all until we went and got them. Now, you want to call them outsiders but to me, they helped quite a few people, including my little Amelia, and I'm glad to call them part of my pack. So, I suggest you apologize and walk away before I call the Alpha in here and let him kick your ass! Or better yet, I could call the twins who have made it known that she is their intended mate!" Jacob seemed to get louder and louder the more he talked and before he was done, he had the attention of everyone in the gym. Mac seemed to get paler and paler the more he talked and by the end, he was visibly deflated.

  "I'm sorry. I didn’t know who you were. I just figured you were another adopted member of the pack.”

  “Well, that’s a very piss poor apology. S
o what if I’m just an adopted member. Would I not still be a part of your pack? If the Alpha felt strongly enough to bring me to your pack and allow me to stay, doesn’t that mean that he accepts me and so should you? I don’t understand why you feel like you need to be mean to new people! Just so you know, I’ve lived in foster care my entire life. I’ve had people be assholes to me, spit on me, treat me horrible, abuse me, and the last ones tried to kill me. I’ve never known kindness until I met. Matt and Uncle. Well, and Braxton too. Bryce is an asshole and I haven’t exactly decided what’s gonna happen with him. My point is, I thought by coming here, I wouldn’t have that same prejudice to deal with. You’ve just proven to me that I was wrong. I promised myself that I would never stay anywhere that I’m not wanted. Your words and actions just prove to me that you guys aren’t any more of a family than all of those other foster homes that I lived in before. Now, if you would leave us ‘outsiders’ alone, I wanted to get a workout in with Timmy before I go to bed. And please, in the future, don’t fucking talk to me again or I will kick your ass!”

  With that, I turned towards Timmy and nodded my head back towards the mat. Starting him off in the basic stretches, I ignored everyone around us. After we got warmed up, I taught him some basic stances and also some of the best places to hit or kick where it will hurt. By the time that we were done with our workout, we were both sweating but smiling. He seemed to enjoy learning everything I would show him. I explained to him that if he kept practicing the moves I showed him, then it would become second nature and easier. Also, I told him that once he masters those, we could work on holds and getting to of them.

  Once we were done, I looked around the gym. It had cleared out some since we started but there were still quite a few people there. I still had energy that needed burned off so I told Timmy I was going to run for a while and I’d see him later. As he exits the room, I plug in my earphones and take off running.

  Chapter 16

  The look on Braxton's face at the interruption is priceless! I'm still breathing hard and my lady bits are tingling, but the giggle still slips out. I can't help it. I've never been in a situation like this and it's kind of hilarious. That one giggle turns into full on laughter when Braxton looks at me stunned. I'm smiling so big that my cheeks hurt. Covering my mouth with my hand, I try to slow my laughter but it's not working. I can barely hear his sigh but he's smiling too and soon he starts to laugh too. When he reaches down to adjust himself, I'm thrown into another fit of giggles.

  "Only you would find this funny!" His smile and laughter takes the sting of his words away and we both start to settle down. Wiping my eyes with the back of my hand, I take a deep breath. Damn, my side hurts now but I'm not sure that I have ever laughed so hard. It feels kind of freeing in a way that I have never felt.

  Once we both calm down, I reach over and wrap my arms around Braxton. He seems stunned but immediately relaxes in my hold. I lay my head back against the bed so I can look into his eyes and then lean forward so that I can give him a kiss. It's definitely not as heated as the last one but this one feels even more special. I'm not sure if it's because I am the one that started it or not but I am filled with a peace that I know I have never felt. This just feels right and I don't know how to explain it.

  We separate on a sigh and just look at each other, lost in the moment. It's like we are in our own little bubble that I don't want to pop. The banging starts again on the door, causing us both to jump. I forgot there was even someone out there!

  "Ash, its Randolf. Alpha would like to know if you could join him for breakfast in half hour. Braxton can come too." He ends that with a little chuckle which makes me look towards the man in question.

  "He can smell that I'm in here with you and he can probably hear us too."

  I never thought about that and I can feel the redness creeping over my face. I cover it with my hand and peek out between my fingers. I cannot believe I forgot about that! Braxton, seeing that I'm not ready to answer, hollers to Randolf that we'll be there and then he wraps his arms around me and kisses my forehead.

  "Do you want to shower and get dressed before we head down? I'll go get ready while you are and then meet you back here, if that's okay."

  I nod my head but neither of us releases our hold. Instead, I tighten my arms. This safe feeling is definitely not something that I'm used to and I'm not entirely certain that I want to let him go. He must notice my hesitation because he nuzzles my neck and says, "I'm not going to disappear, baby. I'm here and I won't leave unless you tell me to. I want this. I want you in my life, in my arms, in my bed--everywhere."

  He gives me a quick kiss and then hops up, pulling me with him. With a small grin, he tells me he'll be back and steps to the door. Before leaving, he blows me a kiss and then he's gone. I stand there for a couple minutes before shaking myself out of a stupor and heads towards my bathroom.

  Wow, I didn't know kissing could feel that good. I'm definitely going to have to do that more often!

  Chapter 17

  I quickly take a shower and get dressed. I am just pulling my hair back into a braid when there’s a knock on the door. I holler for them to come in while I finish my hair and toss my wet towel in the dirty clothes basket. I really need to do some laundry but it’s going to have to wait until I have some time. Looking over towards the door, I expect to see Braxton. Instead, however, I see Bryce standing half in my room and looking very indecisive. It seems like he doesn’t know if he wants to come in or turn around and run.

  Once he realizes that he has my attention, I can see the mask slide into place on his face. I don’t like that one bit. After clearing his throat, he starts talking, his facial expression never changing. “I am here to escort you down to the Alpha’s office. I’m not sure if you’ve been there yet and I didn’t want you to get lost.”

  Tilting my head to the side, I study him. His face is a stoic mask but his body is showing his nervousness. Over the years, I’ve learned to read most people and he may be trying to put up a hard, uncaring front, but I can see something else there. I know that now is not the time to get into that, though, and I really meant what I told him last night. Well, this morning. Damn, I’m too tired to deal with all this right now. Those couple hours of sleep I got just weren’t enough but I definitely wouldn’t have traded more sleep for the time I got to spend with Braxton. Speaking of which…

  “Braxton will be back to get me once he finishes getting ready and I’m sure that he knows the way to Uncle’s office. I’m sure you already knew that though, since you can talk to each other in your heads. So, I guess the real question is, why are you really here? I meant what I said last night, err this morning, whatever! You need to figure out what it is that you want. I won’t be an obligation and I won’t force you into anything. This is your decision. Actually, this will be both of our decisions but I had already decided to give you a chance and try to get to know you. You said that is what you wanted but your actions don’t seem to go along with your words. I know you have to act like a hard ass in front of everyone else, but look around, there’s no one else here but me and you. Yet, you still keep your ‘I don’t care’ mask on. If that’s what it means to be your mate, then I don’t want any part of it! Figure it out or don’t. Either way, let me know when you do.”

  I can see the slight flicker of sadness go thru his eyes before he hardens them again. Shaking my head, I know that he’s not going to let me in no matter what I say so I start to walk around him. I can see Braxton down the hallway, headed my way and I smile. That smiles falls when Bryce grabs my arm and pulls me to a stop, keeping me from walking completely out of my room. His grip isn’t tight but his abrupt movement causes me to flinch, which both the boys see.

  “I hear what you are saying and I’m trying. I want to let you in but it’s hard. I know you understand where I’m coming from. I can see it every time you flinch when someone gets too close or makes a sudden move towards you. I want to help ease your pain so much but I don’t know if I�
��m the best person to do that, especially with all the skeletons in my closet. I cannot show weakness to anyone or I risk everything falling apart. That is something that I have had to deal with for my entire life. I will try harder and work at being a better person so that I deserve the chance that you are offering. I don’t know how long it will take but you are worth it.”

  He finishes on a whisper, as though he’s talking more to himself than to me. He starts to turn away and this time it’s me who latches onto his arm. He stops but doesn’t turn back towards me.

  “We both might be a little damaged around the edges but we are not broken! We deserve to be happy and the only way that is going to happen is if we make it. I don’t know about you but I want to smile more. I want to laugh more. I’m going to do everything I can to make that happen and I really hope that you will too. There’s gonna be bad days for all of us but I’m learning that’s the best time to lean on your friends and family. I want you to lean on me when you need it and I’m hoping that I can do the same with you when I’m having a bad day.”