The Single Mums' Book Club

by Victoria Cooke

  ‘Picnic for one?’ he asks pointing to my bakery spoils.

  I smile sheepishly. ‘You caught me. I was walking by the river and didn’t realise I’d got all the way to Crinkly.’

  ‘It’s a nice day for it. I was just going to treat myself to a chicken salad sandwich but that pasty smells so good.’

  ‘Eyes off!’ I pretend to hide it away and he laughs. I’m glad we’re able to talk normally again after the awkward incident last week. ‘I’m going to eat this on the riverbank if you want to join me?’

  ‘I’ve just been in the practice but have finished now and was going to eat mine walking home but I prefer your idea. I’ll meet you over there in a minute.’

  I go and sit down whilst Edward heads into the bakery. It seems natural to sit here and have lunch with him and I can’t deny I enjoy his company. As long as nobody mentions feelings or kissing or attraction, it will be fine.

  ‘I’ll have to live in scrubs if I keep going in that bakery as nothing else will fit me.’

  ‘It will be worth it,’ I say, biting into the flaky pastry and tender steak chunks in a scrumptiously rich gravy.

  He asks about the kids, particularly Ralph, which I think is sweet because he knows how worried I’ve been and as I fill him in, he reassures me that I’m doing a good job. I’m glad we can still talk this way.

  ‘Did you sort your Stacy problem out?’ I thought it was polite to ask but the question sounds loaded when it comes out.

  He nods until he finishes chewing. ‘Yes. I have no idea if she took any of it in. I told her I didn’t see her in a romantic way but valued her friendship.’

  ‘That’s good. Why don’t you think she accepted it?’

  ‘Because her reply was, and I quote, “We’ll see about that”.’

  I laugh. She’s a woman who knows what she wants. ‘What about the unpaid vet’s bills?’

  ‘I’ve left it. It’s my own fault for not being more on the ball. Charging thirty quid as and when she uses the service is one thing, but she owes a few hundred now and I can’t do that to her. From now on though, we charge her and I’ll make sure she’s clear on it before I even look at her devitalised rabbit.’

  I splutter my coffee. ‘Devitalised rabbit? That sounds like a terrible euphemism.’

  ‘Does it? Oh Jesus, thanks for that mental image.’ He puts his head in his hands.

  ‘Sorry. Throwback from an Ann Summers party in the early Noughties where the host had run out of batteries.’

  Edward is taking a sip of coffee and splutters. I don’t apologise because it isn’t just me blurring the lines.

  A family of ducks swim past. One little yellow duckling at the back keeps going off course and the mother has to keep nudging it back into line.

  I point to them. ‘Growing up, all I ever wanted was the perfect family. A mum, a dad and a brother or sister. Look how happy those ducks are – they have everything I ever wanted.’

  ‘I’m sorry. Obviously I know about your mum but didn’t know you didn’t have all the rest.’

  I draw a breath. Explaining this will go some way towards explaining why I am the way I am. ‘Obviously, you know my mum died when I was very young. She and Dad hadn’t gotten around to having any more children so after she’d gone, it was just me and him. Dad was a long-distance lorry driver and so he was on the road a lot, which meant I spent a lot of time with my gran. She was lovely and sweet but it was lonely there, just her and me. I grew up wanting a bigger family for myself, hence the three children, and for a while, I had it. My marriage ending wasn’t a surprise – there was no romance, no spark – but we were a family unit and I’d wanted that my whole life.’

  ‘I’m sorry, Steph,’ he says sombrely. ‘The divorce must have been tough.’

  ‘It was but my biggest fear is my kids growing up feeling like I did, with something missing from their lives. Now Mike has moved on, I need to be the family unit.’

  Edward tilts his head to the side and the sun catches his face, illuminating his Mediterranean blue eyes. ‘Ahh … I see where this is going.’

  ‘It’s not that I didn’t want to kiss you.’ I look down and fiddle with my coffee cup. ‘Or that I’m not attracted to you. It’s that I have to put my kids first.’

  ‘I understand.’ He leans in a little closer so his cool breath brushes my neck. ‘But you can’t do that forever.’

  ‘I know. Maybe if I knew it was serious, I’d take a risk but I can’t upset them over someone I hardly know.’

  ‘So, how about we spend more time getting to know one another?’

  That doesn’t sound like a bad idea. I can’t deny that I want to spend time with Edward.

  ‘What about the other problem? The you’re my boss problem?’

  ‘I think the solution is the same.’

  I ponder this. Is it the same? If we’re not meant to be, can we go back to the way things were? If we are meant to be, can we work together? I guess there’s only one way to find out. ‘Okay, what do you have in mind?’

  ‘Maybe a few dates. We could do it when the kids are with Mike so they don’t wonder where you’re going and you don’t have to tell them. If we decide we don’t want to carry on, no harm done but if we really like spending time together, we reassess the situation.’ He lies back on the grass and rests his head on his arms whilst I think about it for a minute. His long body stretches the width of the broad grassy bank. His T-shirt has ridden up a little, revealing a small sprinkling of dark hair from his navel to his waistband and beyond. For a second, I imagine what it would be like to run my hand along his taut abdomen.

  ‘Okay, what do you have in mind?’

  ‘There’s a pop-up cinema experience going on in Manchester. It’s a seaside theme and you sit in deckchairs and eat cockles with a toothpick plus there will be doughnuts and sticks of rock. I think the movie is Jaws. How about that?’

  ‘It sounds perfect! I love the cinema and haven’t seen Jaws since I was a kid and it terrified me.’

  ‘Great, I’ll get us some tickets for next Saturday.’

  ‘Will you be able to take the time off from being on call?’

  ‘I’ll make a special effort to book the whole day off.’

  My insides clench with excitement.

  Chapter 35

  Monday and Tuesday pass without a hitch. Everyone is breakfasted and deposited at their relevant institutions in good time. I even manage to make myself a healthy packed lunch on both days and Mike reckoned that he made some good progress with Ralph – apparently, he let Kate take him to the arcade. Life is generally as it should be.

  ‘You’re in a good mood today,’ Carly says. I realise I’ve been whistling the theme song from The Greatest Showman for the best part of five minutes.

  ‘The sun is shining; Mrs Pearson left some oat and raisin cookies in the kitchen. What’s not to be happy about?’

  Carly shrugs and gets back to whatever she’s doing. Obviously, I’ve told nobody about the date Edward and I have planned. I haven’t even told Janey or Amanda. Until I know what’s going on between us, I don’t want it to be a thing I have to explain to anyone, or actively have to hide from the children.

  As I bite into my second cookie, the door jingles open and a kaleidoscope of pink enters. It’s Stacy in all her salmon-flushed glory. I’m in no doubt that her skin-tight, low-cut dress is intended to impress and her pink strappy heels could probably pass for beginner stilts. I can’t imagine going to all that effort to traipse around Crinkly on a Wednesday lunchtime. Each to their own I suppose.

  ‘Ms Dalton?’ I say, scanning the appointments diary.

  She leans over the desk. ‘Oh, don’t worry about that. I don’t have an appointment.’

  ‘Ahh,’ I say. This is awkward. ‘Dr Prescott is fully booked today. I can look through his availability for tomorrow if you’d like?’

  She laughs as if I’ve done something really silly. Whatever the joke was, I missed it.

  ‘I’m here to have lun
ch with Eddy. I know he always breaks off around this time for something to eat. He’s a creature of habit that one. Anyway, I’ve brought him some quiche from the bakery. Could you fetch him?’

  ‘Carly, do you mind popping in to ask Dr Prescott if he’s okay to step out? I need to make a call.’ I don’t want to get in the middle of this and I pick up the phone before giving her a pointed look. She raises her eyebrows at my newfound and very misplaced sense of authority but she’ll get over it.

  A few moments later, Edward emerges in a clean set of scrubs. When he spots Stacy, his body stiffens. ‘Is everything all right with Fluffy?’

  Fluffy?

  Stacy waves a dismissive hand. ‘Oh, she’s fine. I’ve brought you some lunch – a hardworking man like you has to eat. And that’s what friends do for one another.’ She winks animatedly. I drop my head and pretend to work on something engaging but Carly can’t help herself – she might as well grab a tub of popcorn.

  ‘I, er, Stacy, that’s very thoughtful of you but you know how my job is really important, like, life-or-death important?’

  She nods.

  ‘Well …’ He gestures to his scrubs. ‘I’m in the middle of one of those life-or-death problems.’

  I glance at the diary. He has a dachshund in for a jab – it’s hardly a grand-finale-Turner-and-Hooch situation.

  ‘I love what you do,’ she gushes as she places a picnic basket on the counter. ‘I’m going to leave this here so you can eat when you’re ready but I will need my hamper back. Drop it off when you get a break from saving the world one doggy at a time.’

  She doesn’t even wait for a reply before gliding out the door.

  ‘I’ll pop this in the fridge,’ Carly says, taking the hamper to the kitchen.

  ‘She’s good,’ I say once Carly is out of earshot.

  ‘What do I do?’ he says with a forced laugh. ‘If I don’t laugh, I’ll cry!’

  I shrug. ‘I don’t know. She’s got more balls than Lancelot the lottery draw machine.’

  ‘Seriously help me!’

  ‘You could just marry her and have done with it,’ I say.

  ‘Oh don’t.’ His eyes sparkle with mirth despite his predicament.

  ‘Just talk to her again.’

  ‘Do you really think she’ll listen?’

  I don’t need to ponder this. ‘No. You could try being less Mr Nice Guy and more direct. Be firm.’

  He leans on the counter and taps his forehead against it.

  ‘Maybe she needs a new focus. A new object of her affections, so to speak,’ I say.

  ‘I’m listening, tell me more.’

  ‘Well, no offence, but I don’t think it’s you she necessarily wants. I think she’s lonely and you’re the most eligible bachelor in the village.’

  ‘You’ve got a funny way of saying I’m handsome and charming.’

  I roll my eyes. ‘Modest too.’

  ‘Jokes aside, you might be on to something. She’s already been after the village doctor and dentist but now they’ve settled down and married, they’re out of the picture.’ He pauses. ‘Hang on, that means I’m her third choice. I have a good mind to keep that hamper as compensation.’

  ‘Oh come off it. You’re not seriously insulted – you don’t wear nearly enough pink to grab a top spot on Stacy’s list. Come on – who are the eligible bachelors of the village?’

  ‘Eligible bachelors? For you?’ Carly appears in the doorway.

  ‘Oh no, for Stacy, not me,’ I say a little too quickly.

  ‘I’ve heard that Dave the pub landlord signed up for online dating. He must be over his wife leaving him now, it has been a good three years now,’ Carly says with a shrug.

  ‘Dave’s all right looking,’ Edward says earning himself two pairs of jack-in-a-box eyebrows. ‘I can notice these things.’

  ‘He’s not exactly the qualified professional she normally goes for, but it could work,’ I say.

  ‘She’s always flirting with him in the pub,’ Edward adds.

  I think we need to plant some seeds.

  Chapter 36

  On Thursday lunchtime, Edward announces he has to pop down to Crookney Farm and asks if I’d like to go. He said it would be good to put the clients’ faces and names together to have a better relationship. I thought it was a little odd but Carly didn’t bat an eyelid.

  When we arrive, I’m utterly charmed. The large, rustic, red-brick house stands proud in the endless, flat fields around. There are several outbuildings built from either brick, wood or corrugated steel. Black and white cows graze lazily in the field to my right whilst the other fields beyond are filled with crops of some description. We drive past the house and pull up by a wooden stable.

  ‘I need to look in on one of the horses. She had an op recently and I said I’d check her over.’

  I nod but stay seated. I might as well wait in the warm.

  That idea is short-lived when Edward swings my door open. ‘Well? Are you coming?’

  I follow him into the barn. The smell of hay and horse manure is strong and I cover my nose.

  Edward laughs. ‘That’s the smell of the countryside.’

  The farmer greets us. He’s a ruddy-looking man who evidently spends much of his time outdoors. He’s to the point but polite with it. ‘So, what do you think, Doc? Glue factory?’

  ‘Oh no. She’s got plenty of mileage in her yet,’ Edward replies, patting the brown mare on the side of her face.

  ‘You going for a ride?’ the farmer asks. I expect Edward to politely decline so when he says we’d love to, my jaw hits the floor.

  ‘Edward, I can’t ride,’ I say nervously.

  ‘I can.’ He winks. The farmer brings out a white horse and sorts out the tack before placing a little stool by the side of her.

  ‘You can ride with me,’ Edward says, shrugging off his jacket and climbing on.

  Oh God. ‘I don’t know about this.’

  ‘Come on. If you hate it, I’ll let you get off.’

  Something about the idea of clinging to his firm body for dear life entices me.

  ‘Okay. I’ll do it.’ The farmer helps me on. Even with the footstool and the farmer’s burly strength, I struggle but once I’m up there and my arms are around Edward’s strong torso, I feel safe.

  The hind of the horse sways from side to side as Edward guides her towards the bridle path that cuts through the farm. The fresh scent of his aftershave lingers on the breeze. I pull myself in towards him and I’m not sure if it’s purely for safety or to inhale the scent of him.

  ‘Edward?’ I ask after a while. ‘What are we doing?’

  His shoulders vibrate gently with soft laughter. ‘If I said horse riding, you’d think I was a sarcastic idiot wouldn’t you?’

  ‘Yes.’

  ‘Okay, what about if I said I couldn’t wait until Saturday to spend time with you?’

  My insides squeeze pleasantly. ‘Then that would be okay.’

  The path leads us to a small brook and Edward pulls the horse to a stop. ‘Where did you learn to ride?’

  ‘My mum signed me up for lessons when I was a kid. I don’t do it much anymore but Kev, the farmer, likes me to ride Orla here because it’s his wife’s horse and she has health issues and can’t always get out on her.’

  ‘There you go again, always doing things for others.’

  ‘I think most people would if they had the time. I don’t have much else going on aside from work. Let’s take a walk. I’ll keep her steady whilst you climb down.’ He gives me some instructions about using the stirrup but when I kick my leg around the back the momentum is too much and I find myself sliding off.

  ‘Edward!’ I scream, trying to grab a hold of the seat but my fingers can’t get purchase and instead, I find myself in a heap on the ground.

  ‘Steph? Are you okay?’ Edward is off the horse and by my side in a flash. I can’t help giggling. Yes, giggling like a fifteen-year-old who’s just found out the school heartthrob scribbled her na
me in a love heart on the toilet wall.

  He tethers the horse to a tree and she starts grazing on the grass. As we walk along the uneven ground by the brook, the warm early-summer sun beats down on us. The metallic smell of the brook and the fresh grassy scent is as wonderful as the cool breeze. Suddenly, Edward stops.

  ‘I wanted to bring you here, to my favourite spot. Look at how the land stretches on for miles until it meets those hills in the distance. On a day like today, where the sky is an uninterrupted blue and you can see such a distance it gives me space to breathe if you know what I mean.’

  Perhaps this is Edward’s version of me hiding in the loo for some peace and quiet. ‘Yes.’

  Golden beams of sunlight streak across the hills, coating the trees and everything else in their path. It’s a lovely spot. We sit down and just take it in for a while. The breeze plays with the ends of my hair, eventually lifting the strands and pulling them across my face. Before I react, Edward reaches up and tucks it behind my ear. I get a pleasant fizz in my stomach and then, gently, he turns my head to face him and moves an inch closer. The warm air is thick with tension. I respond, closing the distance and our lips touch, hot and wanting.

  My phone buzzes in my pocket with violent impatience.

  ‘Oh no. I’m sorry.’ I pull away, breathy, and check my phone.

  ‘It’s Mike?’ I give Edward an apologetic glance but he gestures for me to answer.

  ‘Stephanie, Ava had an accident at school. I’m on my way to get her. The school office said she’s okay but may need to go to A & E. I don’t have any other details but you need to get to us sharpish.’

  ‘Oh God. Of course. I’ll see you at the hospital.’

  When I hang up, Edward is already pulling me back towards the horse.