Jude

by Kate Morgenroth

  Jude sneaked a glance over at Anna. She was listening, but her gaze was trained carefully on the papers in front of her.

  “Plus, I think you’re worldly enough to realize that the media spotlight on this case does change things. Maybe it shouldn’t, but the reality is that it does.”

  “Why do I feel like you’re setting us up?” Maria said.

  “Well, you can judge for yourself. I’m willing to offer three years. He could be up for parole in less than two.”

  “That sounds—”

  Comfort held up a hand. “On the condition that the defendant not only gives us his connection, but also agrees to testify against that person.”

  “And if my client isn’t willing to testify? What are you offering then?”

  “Nothing,” Comfort said. “Not a thing.”

  “Before you said—”

  “I’ve changed my mind. If your client isn’t willing to give us a name and testify against that person, we will be going to trial.”

  Jude almost groaned aloud. He’d known it was going to be bad turning down the plea in front of Anna, but now she was going to think that he was turning it down because he wouldn’t give up his connection.

  “Can I have a moment with my client to talk about it?” Maria said.

  “Of course.”

  Maria leaned over to him and spoke into his ear from behind her hand. She said, “Take it. For God’s sake, take it.”

  He pulled back, looked at her, and shook his head.

  She leaned in again. “Can we tell them we’ll think about it?”

  It was tempting to delay so he wouldn’t have to be in the same room with Anna when he turned it down, but he didn’t give himself time to consider it. “No,” he whispered. “Just tell them no.”

  “Don’t be stupid. Take it. I’m asking you to take it.”

  “No.”

  “This is it, you know,” she hissed. “You won’t get another chance.”

  “I know.”

  “Fine. I wish I could force you, but I can’t. The one thing I won’t do is tell them for you. I don’t want any confusion here—I don’t want anyone thinking I counseled you not to take the deal.”

  He wanted to say, “Please tell her for me. Please don’t make me do it.” But he thought of the day when Anna would find out the truth, and it gave him the courage he needed. “Okay,” he said, and they straightened in their chairs.

  “My client has made a decision,” Maria announced. “But I am going to let him speak for himself.”

  Everyone looked at Jude. He wanted to know if Anna was watching him, but he didn’t quite have the courage to check. So he ended up looking at Harry when he said, “No, thank you.”

  Harry couldn’t repress a tiny smile. Jude saw it because he was looking at him, but what he didn’t know was that Maria saw it also—and puzzled over it for a long time.

  But Harry’s tiny smile was overshadowed by the snort that burst from behind him. Jude’s eyes followed the sound, and he caught Anna’s gaze. It was the first time she had looked at him, and the expression in her eyes made him flinch.

  For a moment everyone was frozen, watching the two stare at each other. Anna rose from her chair, her eyes still on Jude. “I think we’re done here,” she said.

  Everyone leaped up at the cue. Comfort’s papers were in his hands, then his assistant was up and ushering Jude and Maria out of the room.

  Jude could never remember the instant when he and Anna actually broke eye contact. It seemed to him that one second they were locked on each other, then she spoke and the next thing he knew he was outside her office.

  Both Maria and Jude stood there beside the closed door, blinking at the swiftness of their eviction.

  The door to Anna’s office opened once more, and they both turned expectantly, but it was just the young lawyer with a folder that Maria had inadvertently left behind in the room.

  Maria thanked him absently.

  “Well,” she said to no one in particular, “I guess that’s that.”

  21

  A WEEK AFTER the meeting Harry came to visit Jude at the juvenile detention center.

  Jude was lying on his bunk dozing, even though the corridor rang with the shouts and arguments of the other boys awaiting trial. He had become adept at sleeping through almost any noise, and he found that it was the best way to pass the time. When he slept, he didn’t have to think. He figured that if he could sleep enough, then one day he would wake up and it would be over, almost like a bad dream.

  The clanking of his cell door woke him. He opened his eyes and there was Harry, saying, “What are you doing sleeping in the middle of the afternoon? I tell you, I’m thinking of going out and committing a few crimes myself to get some rest.”

  The guard who had opened the door laughed dutifully.

  “Come on, Jude, they’ve given us a room where we can sit down and talk.”

  Jude sat up, swung his legs off the edge of the bed, and pulled his shirt straight on his shoulders, where it had twisted around his body as he slept. He stood, took a step over to the sink, and splashed water on his face, then over his hair to smooth it. Then he turned to follow the corrections officer out of the cell. He didn’t say anything simply because he was out of the habit. Most days he spoke only a word or two, “Thanks” or “Okay” to the officer who brought him meals or escorted him to the shower.

  Harry must have caught some of his silence, because he followed Jude and the officer down the corridor without speaking.

  When the officer opened the door to the room, Jude said, “Thanks, Officer Lopez,” and the man answered, “No problem, Jude.” Lopez let Harry pass through and closed the door behind them.

  Jude took a seat on one of the folding chairs, hunching over the table. Harry took the chair next to him.

  “It seems like you’re doing pretty well here,” Harry observed. “Getting to know the guys.”

  “I’m okay,” Jude replied listlessly.

  “Have they been nice to you?”

  “They’re fine.”

  “Good.”

  There was a pause.

  “You did great at the meeting the other day. You didn’t lose your nerve.”

  Jude shrugged.

  “I meant to come by earlier, but I had to wait for Anna to settle down.”

  It was amazing how quickly feeling could return. A moment before, Jude had felt like Harry could have said anything and it wouldn’t have mattered, but the mention of Anna settling down made him sit up a little straighter. He wanted to ask about it but didn’t know how. He didn’t have to.

  “She was pretty upset afterward,” Harry said. “Even the public response hasn’t cheered her up much. Have you seen the newspapers?”

  “They don’t give us the papers in here,” Jude said, thinking about what Harry meant by “upset.”

  “Oh.” Harry seemed nonplussed. “Well, the coverage has been phenomenal. The press has recognized that she is everything a public servant should be. In the Independent they wrote that she sacrifices her own desires to be an instrument of justice for the people.” Jude didn’t respond, so Harry went on. “The amazing thing is that it’s not our connections anymore. I don’t know the reporter who wrote that. Even most of Anna’s enemies are laying off on this one. Only the Courant suggested that she’s sacrificing you to her political ambition, but I heard through the grapevine that they received so much angry mail in response to that editorial that they haven’t tried it again. I think the TV interviews have helped enormously. No one can possibly listen to Anna talk about her decision and not realize how difficult this has been for her. She did a great piece on channel four’s news hour about the hard decisions we have to make as individuals that will affect the future of our country.”

  Jude made a noise at that, something between a “Huh” and an “Uhn.”

  Harry seemed to take it as encouragement. “Some of the reporters are comparing her to the old class of political servants who worked for t
he system instead of making the system work for them. We’ve just released some information that we gathered about the mayor’s personal abuse of the privileges of his office. It has made for a remarkable contrast, and the trial is going to be even better. The timing is perfect—right before the election. You should see the latest polls. Anna isn’t exactly the underdog anymore. She has a real shot at it now, Jude, and it’s because of you.”

  “That’s good, I guess.”

  “And don’t you worry about getting out afterward. I’ve got that all covered.”

  Jude nodded absently.

  “You okay?” Harry asked.

  “Yeah, fine.”

  Harry squinted at him. “You sure?”

  Jude finally looked at him. “What did you come for, Harry? I’m sure it wasn’t to find out how I am.”

  “It was part of it,” Harry said defensively. “I was planning on coming anyway, but then Anna asked me to speak to you. She wanted to come herself, but I managed to convince her that it would compromise the case.”

  Jude was suddenly very still.

  “Jude, she wanted me to ask you to reconsider.”

  “Reconsider?” Jude repeated, not understanding.

  “The plea bargain,” Harry explained. “I told her that it wouldn’t do any good, but she insisted that I try. Just in case she ever asks, I had better tell you the message.” Harry hesitated, then continued. “She says, ‘Please. Please do this one thing. If you can’t do it for yourself, do it for me.’ That’s her message.”

  Jude could feel something breaking loose. It couldn’t have been easy for her to ask that from him. “Can’t we tell her—”

  “It needs to be real,” Harry reminded him. “Even if she did decide to go along with it, she can’t be acting a part. It just won’t work. So you need to hold on and be strong for her right now. Okay?”

  Harry’s gaze was level—without any trace of pity or disdain that Jude could detect.

  Jude took a deep, shaky breath. “I’m scared,” he said. It was such a relief to admit it. “It’s all … more than I thought. More serious. More real. More everything.”

  “Hey, I warned you it wouldn’t be easy,” Harry said with a smile.

  Jude smiled weakly.

  “Just think about how it will feel when she finally knows the truth,” Harry said. “What a moment that’s going to be, right? Right?” he repeated, demanding an answer.

  “Yeah,” Jude agreed. “Right.”

  22

  THE TRIAL PASSED in five hazy, droning days. When it started, Jude had spent more than 150 days at the juvenile detention center. Toward the end he even started to look forward to the trial as something to break the monotony.

  On the day that the trial started Jude was awakened at six and given breakfast in his cell—the same as any other day—but this time he wasn’t able to roll over and go back to sleep. He was driven to the courthouse and allowed to dress in slacks, a white button-down shirt, and a gray blazer. It was all freshly dry-cleaned, so there were no wrinkles in the coat and there were sharp creases down the front of his pants, but the crispness of the clothes didn’t cover the fact that the jacket was tight across the shoulders and the pant legs were too short. It was as if the clothes were telling him that after almost six months in juvenile detention, he didn’t quite fit into his old life anymore.

  Maria was waiting for him in an adjoining room, and after he had dressed, they entered the courtroom together. Jude sat next to Maria; Comfort and his assistant were at the opposite table; and the seats were filled with potential jurors. The judge behind the bench was a stoop-shouldered old man with heavy bags under his eyes and thin white hair that tended to wave with static, especially after he rubbed his hand through it, which he had a habit of doing.

  By eleven the heat from the hissing radiators made Jude’s eyelids droop. They broke for lunch, and it was worse in the afternoon. He caught himself nodding off a few times, before jerking upright. He just couldn’t seem to work up a proper interest. By the end of the day they had chosen twelve jurors and two alternates, and all he could think about was getting back to the cell, which he had been so anxious to leave, so he could lie down and go to sleep.

  And it continued like that throughout the following days. Opening statements found him yawning through Maria’s and Comfort’s impassioned speeches. When Comfort described the case, he made it sound as if Jude was everything that was wrong with society today—a young man who didn’t think of consequences, who hadn’t learned the difference between right and wrong, who had consulted only his own wishes in his actions. In Maria’s reconstruction of events she implied that he was a victim of his father, of his upbringing, of his environment. Jude had trouble concentrating on the arguments. If anyone had bothered to ask him, he would have said that he thought both Maria and Comfort were full of it.

  In the afternoon the assistant DA called his first witness, Nick’s mother.

  Nick’s mother talked about her son, recounting stories of him as a child. She brought baby pictures, and she admitted that she hadn’t talked to him about drugs. She said she thought that, at one of the best prep schools in the city, he would be safe.

  She spent most of her testimony staring at Jude. Jude made the mistake of looking up, but only once. After that he kept his gaze trained on the tabletop.

  After lunch Comfort called Toby, the student who had been with Nick when he overdosed. Toby testified that Nick said his dealer had instructed him as to the proper dosage for the heroin he was buying. Toby also admitted that he had done the recommended dosage and been fine. The day of the overdose, however, Nick had just made a new purchase. He used the new stuff, while Toby finished up heroin left over from an earlier buy. Toby noticed that there was something wrong only when Nick started having convulsions, and by then it was too late.

  Comfort asked about how Nick had gotten the drugs. Toby said that for a long time everybody knew that Jude took Nick back to the old neighborhood to get them. For the final few months Nick didn’t make any trips, but he seemed to have an unlimited supply. No, Nick had never said it was Jude who was supplying him with the drugs, but he’d often called Jude his “man” and his “connection.”

  After Toby’s testimony the court adjourned for the day. The next morning Comfort called one of the officers who had arrested Jude in the park. He recounted the events leading up to the arrest and confirmed the amount of heroin Jude had in his possession. In the afternoon Comfort followed the arresting officer’s testimony with the expert who had tested the heroin. He told the jury that it was 91 percent pure and took them through the implications of this discovery and the potential consequences.

  In all her cross-examinations, Jude knew, Maria was trying her best for him. The truth was he hadn’t given her much to work with. He couldn’t tell her what really happened, and he didn’t trust himself to sustain a credible story, so he chose to say as little as possible. As a result Maria’s cross-examinations were short. The first witness, Nick’s mother, Maria chose not to question at all. There was no point, she told him, of trying to attack a grieving mother—that was not the way to get the jury on your side.

  Maria questioned Toby, but only briefly. She asked him if Nick had ever said that Jude had sold him drugs. Toby said no. She asked if Nick had ever identified Jude as his dealer in the last few months when they had stopped the trips back to the neighborhood, and Toby admitted that Nick hadn’t.

  Maria followed a slightly different tack with the expert witness. She asked him whether he could be sure that Jude knew the purity of his supply. The expert said that he couldn’t be sure of that. Then she asked him how often heroin of that purity got sold on the street. He replied that he personally had never heard of it happening before.

  Jude almost felt sorry for her—for her determined efforts to save what was clearly beyond hope. But he didn’t feel sorry for long. Soon he found he needed all his pity for himself. At the end of that day’s questioning Maria told him, “Tomorrow
they’ll finish up their case. We’ll see if they call their last witness.”

  It was the tone of her voice that made Jude ask, “Who’s their last witness?”

  “Your mother.”

  23

  THROUGHOUT THE OPENING days of the trial the courtroom had been full—but on the day of Anna’s testimony it overflowed. The judge had to ask the people standing in the back, unable to find seats, to leave. Then he called the room to order, and Comfort called his last witness.

  Anna rose from the second row of benches and made her way up to the stand. Here, in the courtroom, among all these people, she seemed smaller, but she held herself straight, and Jude felt a surge of pride. He was proud of the way Anna was holding up under the weight of so much eager fascination. She was sworn in, then smoothed her skirt as she took a seat. During her testimony Anna kept her eyes on Comfort as he asked her the questions. She didn’t look at the jury, and she didn’t look at Jude while she related the events that led up to Jude’s arrest. She started with Nick’s death and the futile search for the source of the drugs. Then she related the circumstances that led her to overhear his phone call, and described the steps she had taken that had ended in his arrest in the park. Throughout, her voice was even and dispassionate.

  After establishing the facts of the case, Comfort steered her away from recent events and took her back to the time before Jude was born. Jude could sense everyone in the room sit up. The information that they’d been hearing—the phone call, the sting, the arrest, the search—they had already heard about in various forms from the arresting officers. They all wanted something more personal, and now they sensed they were about to get it.

  “You were first in your class in law school, weren’t you?” Comfort asked.

  “Yes.”

  “You had your pick of jobs, didn’t you?”

  “I had a lot of offers,” she admitted.

  “Why did you seek out a position in the DA’s office when you could have made two or three times as much in a private firm?”