James Graham Plays 2

by James Graham

  John Only Brussels.

  Hilary Who, Wolfgang?

  Jim (Wolfgang) ‘Yes?’

  John ‘That was a great speech.’

  Jim ‘OK.’

  John ‘What you and, and Octavio and Miguel are doing, over in Paris and in –’

  Jim ‘Thanks.’

  John ‘And so dangerous for you to come to speak in London, they could detain you here if they –’

  Jim ‘They could detain me everywhere. But we must spread the word. Excuse –’

  John ‘Exactly, that’s – exactly, we’re . . . we’re hoping, thinking, of setting something up. Erm. Here. In the UK, London. In Britain.’

  Jim ‘Something?’

  John ‘A group.’

  Jim ‘A group. OK. Good luck.’

  John ‘No wait, I’m serious, we’re serious –’

  Jim ‘Everyone always thinks they’re serious. No disrespect.’

  John ‘We’re ready. We’ve studied. We’ve trained, our minds, our . . . We’re ready, you have to believe us. But – we’d, we would need help. We would need . . . stuff, that we can’t acquire over here. We would need to be part of the chain. The network.’

  Jim ‘You can’t just decide to become a link in the chain, you have to earn it –’

  John ‘Let us earn it, let us prove to you.’

  Jim ‘. . . mmm . . . So you say serious, how serious, are you?’

  Hilary ‘. . . Deadly . . .’

  Jim ‘So, say, I don’t know, someone contact you, someone need something storing, away from prying eyes, cleaning, preparing, loading, all that, ready for a situation as and when a situation may arise . . .’

  John ‘We could do that. We could definitely do that.’

  Jim ‘You have a place that is safe?’

  John ‘We will have.’

  Jim ‘Who is “we”?’

  John ‘Four of us, A – . . . someone called Anna, someone called Jim, this is someone called Hilary and I’m someone called John.’

  Jim ‘. . . OK, well, hello someone called John. Maybe we will be in touch.’

  Insert magazine clip in this thing here.

  Anna Where’d you learn this?

  Jim Read it.

  Anna Read it where?

  Jim From a book. Pull back on this, that locks it in.

  Anna Sexy.

  Hilary You are quite sexy, doing that.

  Jim Thank you – safety catch. Lift up. And point. Best resting against your shoulder. Aim down the barrel. Front trigger is single shots, click, click, click. Back trigger is rapid fire.

  Anna This is what they used on the embassy?

  Jim Yup.

  Anna When will they want it back?

  Jim Dunno, whenever.

  John It’s ours for now, if we want it.

  Hilary Guns are one thing though, right. But guns mean you have to be there, at the target, guns require firing. Bombs don’t require firing, bombs can be left.

  Anna Bombs are also indiscriminate, though. Guns can be aimed. Bombs do whatever the fuck they like.

  Hilary I think that’s why I like them. They have integrity. They don’t care.

  John Anna?

  Anna Yes?

  John Would you like to express something?

  Anna What?

  John Would you like to express something about bombs that you’re uncomfortable with?

  Anna I would like to talk about it, I have nothing particular to express.

  John OK. Talk.

  Anna Innocent people might get –

  John Who are these innocent people you speak of, do you mean politicians, do you mean the police, do you mean, do you mean the, the soldiers, or the civil servants at the doll office, or the teachers in the school that lie – were the guards at the concentration camp innocent because they were just following orders unquestioningly – I’m not comparing, but I am, I sort of am, I’m –

  Hilary I think I can take this, let me –

  Anna You don’t have to sell to me our war like it’s a two-for-one on talcum powder, you can save your pitch, I don’t need convincing, I just want to think through my thoughts –

  Hilary There are these flats in Swansea.

  John I fucking love this story.

  Anna I don’t want a story, don’t tell me stories, narratives corrupt, narratives make people think there is meaning and a purpose to a series of randomly connected events, that there is a plan to life, and there isn’t –

  John Listen –

  Hilary There is this tower block, ‘streets in the sky’, that BOLLOCKING FUCKING urban planning myth, ‘we’ll take you from your horizontal open plains, from your square inches of land, and pile you vertically upwards, together, one on top of the other, because it’s better for you’. I would look up at them as I waited for my bus home from school. The flicker of light from one window. And then two floors up, and three windows to the right. The same light. Flickering, changing, dancing, to the same rhythm, the same beat. And it struck me. They Are Watching The Same Thing. They all return home from the production line, enter this block, walk to their individual cells, close the doors, and they sit there . . . watching . . . ‘recuperating’ . . . drawn to the light. Like mosquitoes . . . Their eyelids dipping as their bodies slowly succumb to the tiredness of the day . . .

  Imagine, I thought, imagine if there was a power cut, and the lights went out. Maybe they would turn to the person next to them in the room. And maybe they would talk. And maybe they would open the door into the corridor and peek out to see other people doing the same. And suddenly the whole block is talking to each other, and then I realised that’s it. That’s what cannot be allowed to happen. That’s why the power must stay on. That’s why the flickering boxes cannot break.

  And that’s the point of the explosion. That’s the point of the gunshot. It’s a bang. A bang to wake everyone from their slumber. A bang to make everyone Look Up.

  Anna . . . OK.

  John Where’s the stuff?

  Jim Under the sink.

  John No one asked questions?

  Jim Why would they ask questions, just household stuff, a ‘Saturday shop’, could be baking a cake, all they know.

  Anna/Hilary (singing) If I knew you were coming I’d have baked a cake.

  Baked a cake. Baked a cake.

  Anna/Hilary/John/Jim (singing) If I knew you were coming I’d have baked a cake. Howd-ya do, Howd-ya do, Howd-ya do.

  Anna COMMUNIQUÉ!

  Jim NUMBER ONE!

  Hilary TWO!

  John THREE!

  Ann FOUR!

  Jim FASCISM.

  Hilary OPPRESSION

  All WILL – BE – SMASHED

  Anna EMBASSIES

  John HIGH PIGS

  Jim SPECTACLES

  All SPECTACLES, TESTICLES, WALLET AND WATCH!

  Anna JUDGES

  All PROPERTY

  Anna ‘Fellow revolutionaries. We have sat quietly and suffered the violence of the system for too long. We are being attacked daily. Violence does not only exist in the army, the police and the prisons. It exists in the shoddy alienating culture pushed out by TV films and magazines, it exists in the ugly sterility of urban life.

  In a crisis of capitalism the ruling class can only react by attacking the people politically.

  But the system will never collapse or capitulate by itself.’

  John ‘Order. ORDER!

  The Secretary of State for Employment, Mr Robert Carr!’

  Jim (as Carr) ‘Are we really saying, that the Government, and by Government we of course always mean the People! – elected, unlike protest leaders accountable, unlike anarchists – are the Opposition really saying that it is not within our parliamentary right to even discuss reform of industrial policy in this country, let alone act on it? Without fear of intimidation from the unions, without
fear of intimidation from workers, students and, worse, troublemakers and bullies? Well, this Government will not only discuss these issues, we will act upon them . . . An end to the so-called WORKERS OF THIS COUNTRY HOLDING THIS COUNTRY TO RANSOM!’

  Hilary The Right Honourable Secretary of State for Employment Robert Carr . . . is going to discover what is right, and what is honourable, tonight.

  John Haberdashers’ Aske’s, school for boys. Chapel. 7 a.m.

  (Singing.) ‘And did those feet . . . in ancient times . . .’

  John/Hilary/Jim/Anna ‘Walk upon England’s mountains green

  And was the holy Lamb of God,’

  Jim (as Carr) ‘Get down!’

  Anna (as wife) ‘Robert, I’m scared!’

  John/Hilary/Jim/Anna ‘On England’s pleasant pastures seen!

  And did the Countenance Divine,

  Shine forth upon our clouded hills?

  And was Jerusalem builded here

  Among these dark Satanic Mills?’

  John Everyone needs an anthem to march off to war to.

  Jim Everyone needs a war to march off to.

  Hilary Someone’s been reading Randolph Bourne.

  Jim I’m sure someone has, it isn’t me.

  Hilary Randolph Bourne states that –

  Jim Rando Whoever isn’t here is he – these are my thoughts, and I’m saying there always has to be an enemy, doesn’t there? Governments need there to be a threat, they have to unite people against something, and if there’s nothing there, then you Make One Up. Make one closer to home. Tell ’em the immigrants want your job. Tell ’em the blacks want your women. Tell ’em the poor are getting fickle, and that Something Must Be Done. Give ’em fear, give ’em paranoia, give ’em –

  John The FA Cup.

  Jim Gi – . . . what?

  John A side to support against another side, doesn’t matter who really, they try and kick this, that way, into that, they try and kick the other way, into that – stadiums, they’re the new temples, footy the new religion, promotion the new heaven, relegation the new hell – so long as it occupies hearts and minds. Pick a side, any side –

  Hilary Come on you reds!

  John Go on you blues!

  Jim/John/Hilary/Anna (singing Match of the Day tune) Da-da-da-daah da-dah da-dah-dah, da-da-da-daah da-dah da-dah-dah, da-da-da-daah da-dah da-dah-dah, da-da-da-daah da-dah da-dah-dah, da-dah da-dah da da.

  Hilary What do you see when you look like that?

  John He used to take me to the games.

  Hilary Who did?

  John He was sports editor, for the Evening Standard. I tried to get into it, he knew I wasn’t, though. A disappointment.

  Hoisted up there, on his shoulders . . .

  Didn’t really – you know. Get a chance to – you know. Properly know, him, until . . .

  Nor him himself, probably.

  ‘Retirement’, at the age of sixty-five, like that’s some fucking compensation. That in your final years, you’re finally given the chance to live. Why? Why do we all do it, why do we all fucking . . . accept that?

  Hilary What do you see?

  John He’s in the Red Lion, under the dartboard. In the corner. Getting slowly inebriated like all the rest of ’em. Pretty soon there’ll be a fight, glass smashed. Turn on each other, fighting inwards, instead of looking outwards. That’s the best way. Like rats in a sack. Let ’em fight each other.

  He has nothing to say to his wife.

  He has no friends left.

  He’s sitting in the corner of the pub. Nursing a pint.

  Hilary What’s that sound?

  John It’s a brass band. The workers, they have music that they play. It’s sort of theirs, sort of.

  Hilary It’s beautiful.

  John In some ways.

  Hilary Did he ever play an instrument? This guy?

  John No.

  Hilary What’s he doing?

  John Can’t you see?

  Hilary He’s holding his heart.

  John Yeah.

  Hilary Is he dying?

  John He is, yeah . . .

  Hilary Can we save him?

  John For what? Save him so that he can do what?

  They taught him everything, except how to live . . .

  Anna . . . John.

  John Yeah?

  Anna The girl.

  John Yeah I know. But they went off. They went off, Jim, you did it –

  Jim I told you.

  John They both went off! YES.

  Hilary It’s started. The war has started.

  Anna The little girl was at home.

  Hilary There are always going to be little girls, Anna, steel yourself, focus.

  Anna A LITTLE GIRL.

  Hilary WE KNOW!

  We’re trying to wake her up. Not kill her.

  John ‘And how old are you, little girl?’

  Anna What?

  John ‘Come. Sit down.’

  Anna . . .

  John ‘What’s your name?’

  Anna Anna.

  John ‘Hello, Anna.’

  Anna Are you a doctor?

  John ‘I am a doctor, yes.’

  Anna Where’s your white coat?

  John ‘I’m a different kind of doctor. I fix things in your head, not in your body.

  Your teachers tell me you’ve been getting into a bit of trouble recently.

  Why do you think that is?

  You hit someone.’

  Anna They started it.

  John ‘Tell me. Do you feel a sort of . . . fizzing. In your stomach. Like something bubbling. Do you feel your face something going bright red, like you’re going to explode?’

  Jim/Hilary/John/Anna BANG!

  Anna I woke up, you weren’t –

  Jim What?

  Anna You weren’t there.

  Jim Weren’t where? Where was I meant to be?

  Anna Nowhere. I just. Like it when you’re – when we wake up and you’re there.

  Jim I just fell asleep wherever. I just –

  Anna In Hilary’s room.

  Jim We don’t have rooms.

  Anna The room where Hilary was –

  Jim And John was there. Before he wasn’t. You could have joined –

  Anna Can’t sleep, loads of people, legs and arms, and always in the middle where you can’t roll over –

  Jim/ John/ Hilary (singing) ‘There were four in a bed and the little one said, roll over, roll over, and so they all rolled over and one fell out and now there were only three in a bed’ –

  Anna – maybe we could tonight, like just hug, I’d like a hug I think.

  Jim OK. If we – if that’s where we fall asleep, then . . . sure.

  John That’s them. The squad.

  Anna They’re young.

  Hilary Ten grand?

  John This bunch here, old Dick Barton and Dixon of Dock Green, they’re the senior officers –

  Jim ‘Come along then, let’s be havin’ you’ – fuck off.

  John But these lot, these are different, B-team or something.

  Hilary What would you do with ten grand?

  John What can you do with ten grand, nothing, you think ten grand is worth more than freedom, justice, equality?

  Anna People will be looking for us.

  John We’re safe.

  Hilary I think we’re smarter. Than these lot –

  John We are smarter.

  Hilary They’re not going to catch us.

  John They’re not going to catch us.

  Anna I think this one’s quite cute.

  Jim Well, why don’t you go and fuck him then, Anna.

  Anna . . .

  John They’re pulling in some of the guys.

  Jim How do you know?

  John There’s been word.

  Jim How can there
have been word, we’re –

  John Through the channel, Jim, it’s safe.

  Hilary We’re safe, here.

  John Anna.

  Anna Yeah?

  John What’s that?

  Anna has produced a little tea-pot.

  Anna It’s a tea-pot.

  John . . . wh – . . . why?

  Anna I found it. At the market. I thought it would be nice. To make tea.

  John We have . . . we just . . . there’s mugs, just drop a bag in a mug.

  Anna Jesus, were you born in a barn?

  John No, but Jesus was, number one, and number two . . . what the fuck, don’t go spending money on fucking nothing, we haven’t got enough money.

  Anna I’m sorry, I just thought it would be – Jim/John/Hilary/Anna THE ROYAL ALBERT HALL.

  John ‘Miss United States of America! Look – at – that. Wowee. Give us a little turn there, miss, that’s it. Judges are smiling . . .

  And here’s Miss Egypt! Exotic, or what?

  And on home turf, it’s Miss – United – Kingdom.’

  Jim/John/Hilary/Anna BANG.

  Hilary/Anna BIBA, KENSIGTON HIGH STREET.

  Hilary ‘Recuperation’, that’s all it is, that’s capitalism’s power, it holds things out of your reach so one day you think you might riot but first you need to eat so you have to work, and then suddenly through a tiny wage increase or deflation in the price of this or that, you ‘obtain’ one of those things – a coat, a bag, a slightly better car – and suddenly you think, ‘Oh, well, actually maybe it isn’t so bad’, and anyway . . . their blouses make me look fat –

  Jim/John/Hilary/Anna BANG.

  John/Jim THE POST OFFICE TOWER.

  Jim It’s like a knob.

  John It is.

  Jim Like a big knob in the centre of London.

  John Look at the size of our cock, we say, look how big and tall it is!

  ‘And they said, Go to, let us build us a city and a tower, whose top may reach unto heaven; and let us make us a name, lest we be scattered abroad upon the face of the whole earth.’

  Hilary The higher they build their towers, the worse it shall be when they fall.

  Jim/John/Hilary/Anna BANG!

  Anna Jim?

  Jim Yeah?

  Anna . . . nothing.

  Voice (male, off) Smith.

  Anna You’re looking for me.

  Voice I’m sorry, who is this?

  Anna You’re looking for me. Hello.

  Voice How did you get this number?

  Anna Have you not been watching us? We can find anyone. We’re getting closer . . .