Forsaken

by J. L. Weil

  Dash stood in the middle of a zombie graveyard, his bow at his side. His midnight eyes roamed over my face and then stayed fixed on my shoulder. I hadn’t noticed that my shirt was torn at the sleeve or that a glowing green handprint marked my skin until that moment.

  Wonderful.

  Something else to make me a freak. As if I didn’t have enough problems.

  What did it mean though? Would I forever be branded with this mark?

  Dash’s snarl echoed through the valley.

  I’d never seen him so filled with rage. It almost scared me.

  “Dash,” I called to him, trying to break the swirling darkness still gripping him. He stared at me, and it was as if he didn’t recognize me. I slowly pushed off the ground, rising to my feet. “They’re dead,” I whispered. “I’m okay. You killed them.” I took his face in my hands, keeping his eyes locked on mine until I started to see the silver flecks I loved bleed through the blackness.

  “Charlotte?”

  I nodded and let out a cry of relief. “It’s me.”

  The tight lines in his face relaxed, revealing deep dimples on either side of his cheeks. He lowered his head, capturing my lips in a kiss that made my head spin.

  That was one way to make sure I was alive.

  Chapter Eleven

  Back at the Institute after a day of traveling, there were only two things I wanted: a shower and sleep. In that order.

  Ember, Dash, Ryker, Star, and I had left Hurst the day after the attack. No one really knew what to say about what had happened, and I definitely didn’t want to rehash the details. Living through it once was enough.

  Star hadn’t been jumping for joy over returning to the tower we’d escaped, but after seeing the Forsaken, she knew the safest place in the world was with Dash and me.

  Standing in front of the mirror with dirt covering my cheeks, I could see underneath the grime the unexpected. My skin was gleaming.

  I should have been used to the unexplainable. After all, it was part of my everyday life now.

  The glow was faint but definitely there, and once I got the layer of crud off me, I didn’t doubt it would be even more distinct.

  Only another reason for Dash to stick me in his protective bubble.

  Cranking the shower, I let steam fill the bathroom as I stepped out of my clothes. A wave of emotions built inside me, ready to crash. Confusion. Anger. Relief. Fear. I barricaded myself in the room, not that I believed a locked door would keep Dash from getting inside if he truly wanted to do so. The Slayer had escaped the Institute’s dungeons twice. A bathroom door was child’s play.

  Walking into the shower, I let the hot water rain over my face, and with it came the tears. Everything I had endured since I woke up and everything I had yet to face hit me like a baseball bat in the gut, leaving me breathless.

  I hated that I’d caused Dash to relapse into that dark place he had worked so hard to crawl out of. He never talked about it, but I had heard over and over again how ruthless he used to be.

  The attack was the first time I’d seen how he had earned the nickname, the Slayer, but even at his fiercest, I found I didn’t love him any less. A part of me half expected I’d be scared or cautious around him, but I knew one thing without question: good or bad, Dash would never hurt me.

  I, on the other hand, seemed to be a cesspool of danger.

  Maybe it would be better if I cut everyone out of my life. They would be damn safer, that was for sure. It seemed like every decision I made was critical. Someone’s life was always on the line, whether it was a loved one’s or my own. Soon, a war would dawn on the horizon. Would we come out the other side alive, or would it decimate us?

  It wasn’t until I turned the water off and patted myself dry that I was able to calm down.

  Maybe I should have stayed in Hurst, gone back on the run, and screwed the Institute. Yet, as appealing as the idea was, I could only hide for so long. My father would find me.

  Slipping into clean clothes, I tied my damp hair into a braid and opened the door. Dash was staring out the window, looking a million miles away. He had disappeared after we’d gotten back, and I was surprised to see him in our room. I snuck up behind him, slipping my arms around his waist. “Where were you?”

  He stilled and then forced his shoulders to relax before turning around to face me. “I was terrified when I couldn’t find you. Those few minutes felt like days of torment.”

  I didn’t want to talk about the attack, but if he needed to, I would find the strength to hold it together. “You would be insane if you weren’t scared sometimes.”

  Letting out a shuddering breath, he chuckled, rubbing our noses together. “I’m sorry if I frightened you before. I—”

  My finger pressed against his lips, stopping him from apologizing. “You don’t need to explain it to me. Ever. I know who you are, and I wouldn’t change a single thing about you.” It was as if someone had attached a string to my heart and tied the other end to Dash’s. We had no chance of severing or denying the connection. It just existed.

  “I don’t know what I did to deserve you.” He lowered his forehead, laying it against mine as he exhaled. “I love you, Freckles.” His fingers were at the small of my back, inching me closer. “And I’m never going to stop showing you how much.”

  “I love you too. That’s never going to change,” I vowed, needing him to believe it.

  His lips parted on an inhale. “You’re the only person in this world that doesn’t see me as a merciless killer. I only want you to be happy, but I’m afraid I’ll fail.”

  My belly fluttered. “You make me happy,” I whispered, tracing my finger over his bottom lip. I watched as the silver in his eyes flared, lighting up so they glowed like stars on a moonless night.

  “Ridiculously happy.” His low voice brushed along the side of my neck.

  My heart did a little boogie dance, and I tunneled my fingers into his hair. “You have got to stop doing that.”

  He sent a cheeky grin my way. “What?”

  “Saying things that make me want to kiss you.”

  “Is it working? because I plan on kissing you.” His lips trailed a hot line down my throat. “A lot.”

  “Is that so?” I replied, unable to stop a silly grin from covering my face, while my arms looped around his neck.

  His hands at my waist inched up the side of my body, causing heat to flood through me. “All night long,” he murmured. Slowly, he walked us backward until my calves bumped into the bed frame, all the while teasing my lips with his—little nips that had me aching for more.

  I needed his mouth on mine.

  “Dash,” I breathed, urging him without words to kiss me, really kiss me. More than anything I wanted him to make me feel alive, to remind me good still occurred in this world, and to show me that our love was the purest form of good.

  He lifted me up, placing me on the bed, and I wrapped my legs around his waist in case he got any funny ideas about putting space between us. His lips hovered just over mine.

  Then he kissed me, and everything inside me rejoiced. My body lit up in a scorching song of desire. Almost dying had apparently made me ravenous, for his lips weren’t enough. I thirsted for so much more.

  Fisting the cotton material of his shirt, I lay back and tugged him with me. The hard length of him was delicious against the soft parts of my body. Moaning, I arched my hips upward. Fast. That’s what I was craving. I didn’t want slow or sweet. I wanted hot and reckless. I wanted my body to tremble. I wanted to make him weak.

  Flattening my palms to Dash’s chest, I flipped our positions so I was on top, calling the shots. A prowess I didn’t know I possessed took a hold of me. I rolled my hips, watching his eyes darken and burn for me. It was the most intense and heady feeling. A small smirk escaped as I gained confidence from his reaction. He sat up, his fingers at the hem of my shirt, and swept it over my head in a quick swoop, leaving me in nothing but a pair of pink undies—the most frivolous thing I owned.


  His bright eyes smoldered.

  He hooked a finger inside the lacy band, slowly torturing me as the pad of his finger ran over my belly. “I don’t know what I did to deserve your love, but I won’t ever let you go.”

  “I was hoping you would say that.” Reclaiming my mouth, he met the urgency within me, heartbeat for heartbeat. I trusted no one else in the world with my body or with my heart—only Dash.

  It didn’t matter where he touched me. I felt it in every cell of my body.

  Tendrils of red curls tumbled over my shoulders, partially shielding my breasts as my fingers flipped the button of his pants through the loop. My gaze never left his. He consumed me.

  “You’re glowing,” he whispered in awe.

  A flush stole over my skin as I pulled down his zipper. I didn’t want to think about why my skin might be shining with hints of green. “Lose the pants.”

  He wiggled, shedding the last traces of fabric on him, and my eyes feasted. Every inch of him was golden and glorious. He held so much power within him, but for me, he offered only gentleness.

  My mouth parted as I leaned forward, pressing my lips to the scars marring his chest—imperfections caused by the Institute. To me, they only added to his sexiness. A sharp inhale whistled through his teeth. I lifted my head to look at him, seeing the center of his irises illuminate under long, hooded lashes. My heart tripped, and I fell ever deeper in love with him.

  His hands landed on my upper thighs, and I slid down the length of him until there was nothing between us, only desire.

  I sealed our lips together with greedy kisses, slipping my tongue in to tangle with his. Drunk on the taste of him, he captured the moan of his name as it escaped my mouth. The hunger that consumed us both exploded, and I was moments away from melting.

  In the quiet stillness of twilight, with the fireplace crackling, our hearts and bodies twined together. A current of electricity filled the air, and we became one.

  I never wanted the night to end. I never wanted the feeling of being loved to dull. Nothing more perfect or beautiful existed, and I wanted a thousand more nights like tonight in our future.

  I woke to Dash’s restless sleep, his legs kicking me. He called out. Sweat beaded on his forehead, and I bit my lip, instantly concerned.

  “Dash,” I whispered, gently laying my hand on his brow. At contact, a vision whipped through me.

  Dash was chained to a wall, shirtless. Blood and dirt covered his golden skin, but it was his eyes that stopped my heart.

  Black. Empty. Soulless.

  Like a Forsaken.

  The chains rattled in the damp, dark room. He fought against them, not caring about the cuts on his wrists and ankles.

  “It’s pointless to fight it.” A voice came from the shadows. “You know who you truly are.”

  “Never again,” Dash seethed. His gaze was laser-focused on the hidden figure.

  “Everyone has a breaking point. And I will find yours.”

  The vision vanished, leaving me shaking. I blinked, wrapping my arms around myself.

  Holy shit.

  Was that the dream he was locked in right now? Being held prisoner and tortured? It wasn’t just a dream; it was a nightmare.

  Rage consumed me. I wanted revenge against those responsible for trying to break the defiant and proud man I loved. He wasn’t a tool or a weapon. His gifts didn’t make him who he was. They were only a part of him, not all of him.

  Dash was staring at me, rubbing the sleep from his eyes. Something in my expression must have sent up his internal alarm. His body tensed. “What happened?”

  “It’s nothing. Go back to sleep,” I said, keeping the emotion churning inside me at bay, forcing my voice to remain soft and leveled.

  He saw right through me, sitting up so his back rested against the headboard. “Freckles?”

  The bed sheets draped around me like a silk robe, my skin shining like a pearl in the stream of moonlight. “I had a vision.”

  “What did you see?” he asked.

  “Nothing pretty.”

  His eyes narrowed. “I’m going to need more details. I can tell whatever you saw is bothering you, and since neither of us is going to get any sleep, you might as well explain it.”

  We had never really discussed his dark past, and I hadn’t pushed the issue. What if he didn’t want me to know? I sighed. “It was you, chained to a wall in the dungeons.”

  It felt like I had ripped off a Band-Aid on an old wound. He gritted his teeth, slipping out of bed to stand in front of the window. “Memories have a way of sneaking up on you when you’re most vulnerable. I’m sorry you had to see that.”

  I sat up, clutching the sheet to my chest. “I didn’t mean for it to happen. You were restless, and I tried to wake you up. Before I knew it, I was sucked into the memory.”

  Heavy silence followed.

  “Dash?” I wanted to touch him but was afraid he would reject my comfort. The silence left me clueless to his state of mind.

  Suffering and battle wounds had created a barrier around Dash’s heart, and only recently had I been able to put a crack in that barricade. He loved me, but it hadn’t been an easy road.

  I wasn’t letting him pull away from me.

  He cleared his throat. “I’m okay. You don’t need to worry.”

  A darkness dwelled inside him, one that hadn’t been there before. Or maybe I hadn’t noticed it, but the shadow was definitely there now. And it was my fault.

  If I had just gone back to the Institute instead of insisting on fighting alongside him, this possession or stain on his soul never would have happened. “Everything is not okay,” I whispered.

  “It will be,” he assured me.

  “Is it because of what happened?” I was treading on thin ice, but the words were out of my mouth before I could check myself.

  Again I was met with silence, and I wasn’t sure he was going to answer me. With a deep exhale, he turned from the window, and faced me. “The dreams? Maybe. I don’t know.” He ran a rough hand through his disheveled hair.

  My head hung as I looked down at my hands. “It’s my fault.” I was the reason he’d let loose the side of himself he kept carefully boarded up.

  He sat suddenly beside me on the bed, his hands grasping my cheeks and lifting my face up to meet his luminous eyes. “Shh.” His soft lips caressed mine. “I don’t want to hear you say that. I’m grateful for what happened. It gave me the strength to save you.”

  His admission tugged at my heartstrings, but at what price had he saved me?

  His soul?

  Chapter Twelve

  Ember, Ryker, Dash, and I were summoned to appear in front of the council the day following our return from the attack on Hurst.

  “Who gave you the orders to aid Hurst?”

  “How did you know there would be an attack?”

  “How were you able to defeat them?”

  “What weapons did you use?”

  The questions were rapidly fired at us as we stood in a line. Five founding members, including my father, sat high and mighty behind a long table that spanned from wall to wall. Alone, I would have been intimidated by the group, but standing beside the others gave me a boost of confidence. Ryker, Ember, and Dash seemed to not hold them in high esteem. If anything, the three looked bored.

  “I made the decision to leave and warn Cyan of an attack.” Dash spoke up for the group. “These other fools just followed me.”

  I suppressed the eye roll that threatened to come out. Dash would try to shoulder the blame and protect the rest of us. “I had a vision,” I added, refusing to allow Dash to take the fall. We were in this together.

  Dash’s furious scowl snapped in my direction, and I could feel it in my bones. He had wanted me to keep my mouth shut.

  Sorry to disappoint.

  “I went along for the benefit of the Institute,” Ember added like a good little ass kisser, “to make sure they didn’t try anything that would put us in jeopa
rdy.”

  I snorted, and the sound echoed in the room, drawing disapproval from all directions.

  Dash struggled to maintain his composure beside me.

  A bald man, with thin lips and an extraordinarily round face that was turning crimson, slammed his palm into the table. “What the four of you did was careless and put the security of the Institute at risk.”

  Another man nodded. “They should be locked up.”

  “You’ve tried that before. It doesn’t work.” Dash stood nonchalantly, not in the least bit threatened.

  The third councilman had a pencil-thin mustache and his boxers were in a wad. “We can’t allow them to make any other rash decisions without informing the council first.” The hairs on his mustache twitched as he spoke, like a cartoon character.

  “We can leave if you prefer,” Dash offered, knowing damn well they wouldn’t want to lose him.

  “No,” my father quickly responded, a bit too eagerly. “That won’t be necessary. Tell us about the attack.”

  “The Forsaken didn’t want Hurst.” Dash continued as our spokesperson. “They were after Charlotte.”

  My stomach twisted into knots of dread.

  He thought so too?

  Why hadn’t he said anything to me?

  Did Ryker and Ember think that as well?

  I had told myself that I’d imagined the Forsaken singling me out on purpose.

  “You’re positive?” my father asked, staring directly at Dash. His fingers dug into the wood grain of the table. Rather than disbelief, as I’d expected, I saw his face light up with intrigue.

  Dash, Ryker, and Ember nodded as I stood with my mouth open.

  An icy chill skated down my back. Son of a bitch.

  Why was I always the last person to know what was going on?

  “Why do they want you?” My father directed the question at me.

  How the hell should I know? I shrugged. “I don’t know,” I admitted, feeling more confused than ever. “They trapped me. It wasn’t like we went to dinner and talked about their demands.”