Spun Out

by Lorelei James

“Will do.”

  She hung up.

  Streeter stared at the phone for a moment. Then he said, “Huh. I guess when one door closes—”

  “I always close the door, Daddy,” Olivia interjected.

  He glanced over at his daughter sprawled on the couch, wondering how much of his conversation she’d paid attention to. “Most of the time you do.”

  “Did I get a new babysitter?”

  So she had been listening. “Yep. Someone will be here this week.”

  “Is she old like Mrs. McC?”

  “Nope.”

  She rolled on to her stomach and looked at him. “I heard you tell ’em I don’t got a mommy.”

  “That’s something they need to know, squirt.”

  Olivia crossed, uncrossed and recrossed her ankles as she studied him.

  He braced himself. Any change in her life triggered questions about her mother. He just hoped it didn’t trigger her night terrors too.

  “Can I ask you something, Daddy?”

  “Sure.”

  “If I had my mommy would I still have a babysitter?”

  How was he supposed to answer that? “Maybe.”

  She considered his response for a moment. “Gramma Deenie always tells me that my mommy loved me so so so much.” Cross, uncross, recross. “But I think she’s lyin’.”

  Jesus. “Why would you think that, Olivia?”

  “Because Gramma cries every time she says it.”

  “Talkin’ about your mom always makes your gramma sad.”

  “Maybe Gramma was sad because she knew my mommy didn’t love me.”

  He took a deep breath in and let it out softly. The therapist told him to let these types of conversations run their course. Don’t correct her. Don’t change the subject. Ask her questions and listen to her answers. “You still haven’t given me a reason why you think your mother didn’t love you.”

  “Because if she really loved me then she wouldna died.”

  Streeter moved to sit beside her. He smoothed back her staticky hair. “Darlin’ girl, we’ve talked about this. All the love in the world can’t keep anyone from dyin’. My mama loved me and she died too.”

  She crawled onto his lap and rested her head on his shoulder—an odd reaction for her, and he held his breath. Several long minutes went by as she fiddled with the buttons on his shirt. “Do you think Mommy loved me?”

  Such an innocent question shouldn’t require him to take a couple of breaths before he answered. “Yeah, sweetheart, she did.”

  “You love Mommy, right?”

  “I did.” Thank god she was too young to pick up on the past tense.

  “Gramma Deenie said I don’t need another mommy as long as I’ve got her.”

  He kissed the top of her head. “Well, you needed another babysitter today after Mrs. McC quit.”

  “I hope this new one doesn’t smell mean.”

  “Me too. Speaking of smellin’ bad . . .” Then he sniffed her whole head like a pig searching for acorns. “Girl, you need a bath.”

  Olivia giggled and tried to wiggle away. “Daddy! That tickles!”

  “You sure?”

  “Yes!”

  He kept doing it. She kept giggling.

  This was what his child needed. Just him.

  “Come on, in the tub with you.” He grabbed her by the ankles and carried her into the bathroom, amid her happy shrieks and laughs.

  Later, after he’d tucked her in, he returned to his email and saw Helping Hands had sent another document as well as a payment link.

  A document that requested more details about his financial situation.

  He couldn’t blame them. They were covering their own asses to make sure a ranch hand earned enough to pay for a part-time private nanny.

  Just to be ornery, he filled in the salary he’d earned at his last full-time job, when he’d been part owner at the Hale Ranch.

  That seemed like a lifetime ago, although it’d only been four and a half years.

  Back then, he’d had everything he ever thought he wanted. A stake in the family business, getting paid to do what he loved. A house nicer than the one he’d grown up in. A brand-new, beautiful, healthy baby girl. And most of all, he had Danica, the woman he’d loved for fifteen years, the woman he’d married, the woman he wanted by his side for the rest of their lives. He’d believed she was happy, they were happy.

  That had turned out to be a lie.

  After Danica’s death, Streeter had been forced to go to part-time on the family ranch since his daughter required his full-time attention. After working with his dad and older brother Driscoll his entire life and doing more than his fair share of chores for most of those years, he assumed they’d understand his changed circumstances.

  That had turned out to be a lie too.

  They’d revised his pay from a salaried position to an hourly wage, claiming that he didn’t “need” the money after Danica’s life insurance policy paid out.

  Streeter had never felt so completely abandoned, so he abandoned them and quit.

  By the time Olivia was a year old, Streeter had moved an hour and a half away from the only home he’d ever known to work at the Split Rock Ranch and Resort, job-sharing the ranch hand position with his younger brother, Tobin.

  That turned out to be the best decision he’d ever made.

  Not only had he and Tobin worked well together, his little brother had become his rock when he needed someone to lean on. When discussions about recouping his share of the Hale Ranch went south, Tobin had accompanied him to the lawyer’s office. After their father and brother had grudgingly given Streeter one third of their herd and a cash buyout, Tobin offered his acreage as temporary grazing land.

  The temporary solution had become a permanent operation. Streeter had used the payout money from Hale Ranch to purchase land adjoining his brother’s. After they’d decided to go into the cattle business together—All Hale Livestock—they’d built a barn and corral halfway between Jade and Tobin’s place and the area where Streeter had tentatively platted for a house.

  Most days he was content working at the Split Rock part-time and living in a trailer on the property. He appreciated the flexibility in his hours and being part of a community that understood the real meaning of family first.

  But some nights, he hated the loneliness of his life after Olivia went to bed, even when he knew it’d take a miracle for his single status to ever change.

  Chapter Two

  Look at you, little Angel. Your name fits. So soft, sweet, cute and cuddly.” Bailey smooched her niece’s chubby cheek. “I could just eat you up, Angel cake.”

  “Good lord. You’re almost as gooey with her as her daddy is,” Harper complained with a smile.

  Bailey rolled her eyes at her older sister as she nuzzled the red gold hair on the baby’s head. “Oh, I think Daddy Bran would disagree.”

  “I’d disagree with what?” Bran said behind Bailey as he peered over her shoulder. “There’s my darlin’ Angel girl.”

  Angel smiled at him and cooed, squirming as if she wanted to leap into his arms.

  “Obviously it’s a mutual admiration,” Harper said dryly.

  “Can’t help but adore the girl who is as sweet as her mama,” Bran cooed back at his baby.

  Bailey looked at Harper. “Tell him this is my baby time and he’s not allowed to horn in.”

  “Hogging my girl again,” Bran grumbled. Then he kissed the top of Bailey’s head. “I’m agreeing to this only because I gotta head to town and I’m happy you’re here, brat.”

  Brat. Her brother-in-law’s pet name for her. He claimed he called her that because she’d been in the army—aka a brat—almost the entire time he’d known her. But Bailey suspected the nickname initially started because she had been an eighteen-year-old brat when B
ran had gotten involved with Harper. She cringed, thinking of the horrible way she’d treated her sweet sister who’d stepped up to raise her after their mother had skipped the country with a married man.

  “I’m just happy to be welcome in your house, bro.”

  “Always. And you can stay here as long as you like, Sergeant Masterson.”

  Then he crossed over to Harper and cupped her face in his hands as he kissed her. He murmured something to her that had Harper wrapping herself around him and burying her face in his neck.

  These two. Even after being married for years they were still so gone for each other. The first few times she’d witnessed such intimacy between them, she’d purposely looked away. But now Bailey watched them closely, wondering if she’d ever have that kind of deep connection with someone.

  But these days, she was better off with a hookup that was brief and shallow.

  The sound of a slamming door and rushed bootsteps ended Harper and Bran’s private moment. Arguing preceded Tate and Jake, Bran and Harper’s two oldest boys, as they burst into the kitchen, their little brother, Gage, dragging in behind them.

  “I told you it wasn’t gonna work, dumb butt,” Tate snapped at Jake.

  “At least I’m not too chicken to try something new,” Jake retorted, tacking on “butthead” under his breath.

  “I shouldn’t hafta remind you boys there’s no name-callin’ in this house,” Bran told them. “Now what’s the ruckus about?”

  While Jake jumped in to overexplain before his big brother could utter a single word, five-year-old Gage sidled up and got right in Angel’s face. “Hiya, sissy.”

  Angel kicked her legs with pure baby happiness.

  Bailey watched Gage’s animated face as he talked to his baby sister. Gage had inherited his mother’s sweetness and helpful nature, but in appearance the kid was his dad’s mini-me with dark hair and piercing blue eyes. All of Harper and Bran’s kids were born blond, yet none of them had the same hair color or eye color. Bailey, Harper and their older sister Liberty all had different physical attributes, but they’d chalked up the differences to the fact that they didn’t have the same father. But all four of Harper’s kids had the same dad and none of them looked alike either. Genetics were weird.

  “You like babies, huh?” Gage prompted.

  She smiled at him. “Yep. I snuggled you up when you were a baby too.”

  He furrowed his brow. “I don’t remember that.”

  “I know. But I do and that’s what’s important.” She picked off a long piece of grass that had stuck to his shirt. “Were you out playing in the weeds?”

  “Uh-huh. Then they started fightin’ and it wasn’t no fun no more.” He held out his index finger for Angel to grab onto. “At least she likes me.”

  “I like you too, G-man.”

  He flashed her a shy smile that just melted her.

  So much for being the tough army sergeant.

  “How about when Angel goes down for her nap you and I do something fun.”

  Gage’s face turned hopeful. “Just the two of us?”

  “Yes, sirree. But I’ll warn you, no skydiving or bungee jumping. I’ve got a sore back today.”

  He giggled. “You’re funny, Aunt Bailey. I like you bein’ here.”

  “I like being here too.”

  Gage bounded off.

  In the two weeks she’d been staying here, Bailey noticed that Gage spent a lot of time by himself. Not that he was ignored, but Tate and Jake were closer in age and were always together. And a three-month-old baby took most of Harper’s attention, leaving Gage to entertain himself.

  As the third child, Bailey knew how that felt. She remembered when she was Gage’s age, she tried to find a quiet corner when Mom and her oldest sister, Liberty, raged at each other. Then after Liberty joined the army, Mom focused her attention on turning Harper into a beauty queen and Bailey was ignored. She never resented her sisters for being bold and beautiful, she resented her mom for not bothering to get to know her at any stage of her life.

  Bran whistled loudly to break up the bickering. “Enough. Since I can’t trust you two not to set the hayfield on fire with your rocket ship shenanigans, you’re comin’ into town with me.”

  “But I thought we were spendin’ the day with Aunt Bailey,” Tate said.

  “Yeah, she promised she’d show us how to rappel out of the hayloft,” Jake added.

  Bailey felt both Harper and Bran’s suspicious stares. “I said I’d do that if you two could keep from fighting for one entire day. So far, that hasn’t happened.” Little doubt in her mind that they couldn’t uphold their end of the deal . . . oh, ever, so she wouldn’t have to uphold hers.

  After Harper handed Bran a list, she wandered over to where Bailey sat at the table and smiled at her now-snoozing daughter. “This kid can fall asleep through anything, thank god.”

  “She’ll have to be resilient with three older brothers.”

  “I can put her in her crib,” Harper offered.

  Bailey shook her head and looked down at the babe’s sweet face. “I like holding her.”

  “You’re really good with kids, Bails.”

  “You sound surprised.”

  “Maybe I am. I mean, you never babysat or anything when you were old enough.”

  She sent her sister a sharp look. “What are you talking about? I started babysitting when I was twelve.”

  Harper blinked at her. “You did? Why don’t I remember that?”

  “Because you weren’t there. You went away to school. I needed my own money since Mom spent hers on booze and slutty clothes. By the time I was fourteen I was staying overnight with people’s kids at least one weekend night, maybe two.” Bailey would’ve been stuck home alone anyway; she might as well be making money. “How do you think I ended up attending a private Christian high school?”

  “Huh. I guess I never really thought about it. How did you?”

  “My friend Amy introduced me to some families in her church. I made a good impression and they got the school to offer me a partial scholarship. I was excited until I talked to Mom . . .” Until she laughed in my face.

  Shame bloomed whenever Bailey recalled the nasty words her mom had spewed out like poison that day.

  If you think I’m gonna stay in this dirty little town, working a dirty job where everyone treats me like a dirty whore, while you strut around, acting holier-than-thou, kissing the tight asses of the family values set, think again. You want their Christian charity so bad, take it. But nothin’ is free, daughter, and they’ll have you on your knees one way or another.

  “Bailey?” Harper said softly. “What haven’t you told me?”

  “Just that Mom never paid a dime for my tuition.”

  “How’d you pay the difference?”

  “By babysitting. Right before Mom left, they raised the tuition and I couldn’t earn enough to pay for it by myself. And I didn’t want to change high schools my last two years, or seem pathetic, so I lied to you and said Mom covered the difference.”

  “So you let me believe that you were out partying with your friends, without a care in the world, when you didn’t come home on the weekends during high school?”

  She felt her cheeks heat. “You worked two jobs, Harper, and it still wasn’t enough. Rather than ask you for more money, I earned some on my own.”

  Harper shook her head. “I thought I knew everything about you, Bails. Come to find out . . . I didn’t know you at all. We were so determined to put up a front to everyone in town that we were all right after Mom skipped out on us that we kept up that same front with each other.”

  “That’s why you were so shocked when I joined the army.”

  “I still blame Liberty,” Harper retorted.

  “She never suggested it, but I knew she loved army life. I couldn’t think past g
etting as far away from Wyoming as soon as possible. I didn’t want to go to U-Dub and take general classes and try and figure out what I could be when I grew up. Taking the Armed Services Vocational Aptitude Battery—ASVAB—gave me an idea of where my strengths were, and the military taught me to hone those skills.” She looked at her sister. “The nomadic, hand-to-mouth way we grew up made me crave stability. In the army I didn’t have to worry about housing or food or healthcare. All I had to worry about was learning to do my job better than everyone else so I could move up the ranks faster.”

  Harper sighed. “I’ve said it before, but you did the right thing for you. Still chaps my hide how you went about it, though.”

  She smiled at baby Angel, then at Harper. “It worked out well for you too, sis.”

  “No argument from me.” She folded her arms on the table and leaned closer.

  Bailey’s gaze was immediately drawn to Harper’s enormous boobs—even bigger than normal since she was still breastfeeding. “Since Bran isn’t here to salivate and Angel cake here is snoozing and not looking for a snack, put those knockers away. Sheesh. I don’t need to be reminded that I’m the only Masterson girl with tiny tits.”

  “Most days I’d trade ya. Especially now that I’m once again in the milk cow stage of my life.”

  Bailey reached for her hand. “That’s why I’m here. To help you with your boys and get my baby fix.” Since I doubt I’ll ever have a baby of my own.

  Harper squeezed her hand back. “I worry you’ll be bored out here on the ranch all the time. Would you wanna mix it up and help out at the clothing store?”

  “Doing what?”

  “Filling in, mostly. Now that the boys are out of school for the summer, I’d like to spend more time at home.” She sent Angel a soft smile. “I’m lucky to own my own business and I can take her to work with me. That said, I don’t get a whole lot done while I’m there either.”

  “Either?” Bailey repeated.

  Harper’s chin quivered. “I feel like I’m failing as a mother and a business owner. Doing a half-assed job at both.”

  Whoa. Harper never swore unless under extreme duress. “I’m here in any capacity you need. I’ll even put on a damn dress and convince your customers I know everything about fashion. But I draw the line at wearing heels on the job.”