Playing For Love

by Dana Burkey

  After pretending to do a little more of my homework, I put on my practice clothes and hopped on my bike to head to school. Much like when I have to go to school on Saturdays to catch the bus to my soccer games, it felt kind of wrong to be heading there on a weekend. But, at the same time, it was totally different. I was going there to see Jordan, and I'd gladly do that any day, even during Christmas break! Apparently my excitement and energy were overflowing since I got there in no time at all. I set my bike near the bleachers and started stretching. I tried to act casual when Jordan pulled into the parking lot in his dad's old truck. The red exterior looks like more rust than paint, and it kind of sounds like it might blow up at any moment. In fact, it’s the main reason Jordan rides with Ross to school. He doesn't want to risk breaking down every time he heads to school.

  “Should we run to get started?” Jordan asked once he finally reached me. It only took a few second after he parked for him to make it to where I was standing, but if felt like time was forever since my heart was racing and it made it look like Jordan was moving in slow motion.

  “Sure,” I nodded, knowing it would be a good way to get my nervous energy out. So, with that, we took off.

  I lost track of how many laps we were running since we were chatting about the movie the whole time. The movie had been based on a book, but neither of us has read the book so we talked about maybe checking it out. It made running feel like not a lot of work. Granted, we were only jogging, or at least we were until we decided it was the last lap. Once Jordan mentioned it was time for the final trip around the track I kind of started to speed up. At first it was just a little bit, but then for some reason when I made the final turn I just got this idea in my head that I should really go all out. Well, Jordan noticed me speeding up and then he started to run as well. So I went a little faster. And then he did too. Before I knew it, we were in a full out sprint!

  Even with the recent conditioning and practices, Jordan is way faster than me. Although, he only beat me by a few steps. I was okay with that since it was still a fun way to end the running. We both collapsed on the field and just laid there catching our breath. That I realized we were only getting started. With that in mind, I tried to really slow my breathing down so I'd be ready for whatever was next.

  “Okay, should we try some actual soccer now?” Jordan laughed after we had been resting for a while in silence. I nodded, drinking from by water bottle before standing up and pulling my soccer ball out of my bag.

  “Ross and I usually just play for a while, but we could do drills or something too I guess,” I explained while Jordan got a drink from his water bottle. The idea of practicing with him was great, but I wasn't sure what we actually do. Running was a good way to start without really having to do anything or think about it, but now that we were standing there just staring at each other, it was hard for me to know what the best idea would be.

  “Let’s just play then,” Jordan shrugged. “I’m not super good, but I might come up with a few moves to keep you guessing.”

  So that's what we did. We played one on one using a basketball rule Jordan thought would make it a little fairer. Basically, if you stole the ball you had to take it back to the half line and then try to come in for a goal. It was really easy at first. I would start with the ball and then really easily fake right, then go left and score. Then, when Jordan got the ball, I would pull it back with my toe, turn it around, and go for the goal. I was starting to think playing with Jordan wasn't going to be much help since it was so easy. But then I realized what was going on, he was learning from me!

  Jordan had been watching me for a little while to see what moved I did all the time. So, when I went for the goal in the same way yet again, he anticipated my move and stole the ball from me. I was so shocked he almost made a goal before I even caught up with him. And then, when I went to steal the ball from him next, he anticipated the way I was going to steal it and was able to stop me and score. It was only the first one he made, but it lit a fire under me instantly.

  “Okay,” was all I said, my brain focused only on beating Jordan at getting a goal.

  Up until that point I think we were both mostly just playing for fun. I would laugh a little if I messed up, and Jordan would sometimes make a little comment me if I did something really good. But, once he scored that first goal, it got super series. We started playing all out, and I realized that even though Jordan hadn't played in a long time he was pretty good. He was able to sneak around me quickly, and even though he didn't always kick accurately for the goal, he was getting more shots in thanks to beating me out for the ball.

  There were a few times after that first goal that we honestly were playing a little rough even. Jordan would lean his body into mine to get the ball, and I elbowed him in the ribs once when I turned too fast. Normally I would say “sorry,” even though my coach always told me to be tough, but with Jordan I just kept going. It was like the adrenaline was pumping too much for me to care about being nice. Well, maybe that, and also the fact that I knew he would be okay. We were so into playing that we didn’t realize how late it was until the stadium lights automatically came on.

  “Should we stop?” Jordan asked. I stepped closer to see that his watch read 5:30.

  “A little longer,” I smiled, before I took off for the goal. I scored easily since Jordan had to race after me.

  After retrieving the ball from the goal, I passed it to him so he could take it back to midfield to re-start. Dribbling the ball slowly as he walked, he paused for a second to do something I was not expecting! Clearly overheated from the hard work of our 1-on-1 game, Jordan pulled his shirt off and tossed it to the sidelines. Now, I know guys like to play sports shirtless, and we were both working up a sweat, but it was kind of weird being alone with Jordan on the soccer field and he was there in just his gym shorts and shoes! I had seen him without his shirt on before and knew he looked great and all of that, but this was suddenly different.

  Jordan didn't seem to notice that I was distracted and jumped right back into the game. He scored easily, and thankfully that got my head back into things. I tried not to focus on what he was wearing and instead focus on where he was moving his body and shifting his weight so I could anticipate and steal the ball back. My brain did a good job of not paying attention to his chest, and I managed to stop him a few more times and score a few more goals before we finally took a break.

  “What time is it?” I asked while we sat drinking the last of our water.

  “Almost eight.” Jordan panted, clearly as tired and exhausted as I was.

  “Okay, I think that's enough for tonight!” I laid back on the grass for emphasis. Jordan just laughed and did the same.

  After a few minutes, however, Jordan stood up and slipped his shirt back on. “Want a ride home?”

  In response, I sat up and nodded. Moving to stand in front of me, Jordan reached his hands out to help me up. I hopped up easily and stood there looking at him for a second. Although he had helped me up before, this time was different. After working so hard and getting so hot and sweaty, it was like being that close to him at that moment was more intense all of a sudden. If my life was a movie, I think this would be where dramatic music would fade in. There we were, standing on the soccer field. We were covered in sweat but still in a happy mood. The stars were just visible if you looked past the field lights. It was all kind of perfect. And then, if this was a movie, Jordan would kiss me. Right there, on the field, without even caring if anyone could see us.

  But this wasn't a movie. So, Jordan let go of my hands and picked up my bike while I grabbed the soccer ball and water bottle to stuff into my bag. Then, we walked to his truck, him wheeling my bike for me the whole way. I know I should've been really sad that there wasn't a kiss or anything, but I think at the same time I was making progress. I mean, what guy plays soccer with a girl for five hours on a Sunday night just for fun? The whole ride home Jordan talked about how good I was going to do in the game on Tuesday against
North Lake. He gave me some pointers that he picked up on, like changing things up when I was trying to steal the ball, and then told me a few times how good I was getting.

  When he finally dropped me off at home, I was sad to say goodbye, but at the same time it was all pretty great! I was surprised that no one really made a big deal that I got back so late after I left and went in search of food. My dad asked me how practice went, and I told him it was great without really telling him too much. Both of my parents knew I was practicing with Jordan, but I wasn't going to go into all the details. Keeping things like the fact that Jordan was shirtless for a bunch of the time was best kept to myself. After I ate a ton of food and took a shower, I was watching TV in the living room when Ross got home. He had been out with Skyler all day so he grabbed a plate of everything he could find in the kitchen then plopped down next to me.

  “How was your hike?” I asked, flipping to a show I knew we both liked.

  “Good,” he said between bites. “How was soccer with Jordan?”

  “Exhausting,” I said as casually as I could manage. “He’s a lot better than you.”

  Ross just laughed and said that maybe we should play some two on two sometime so he could try to play Jordan with Skyler on his team. This meant Ross wanted me and Jordan to be a team against him and his girlfriend. Would it count as a double date if we just played soccer? Ever since I found out Skyler knows about my crush on Jordan, I am getting a little worried that word of my feelings will make it back to Ross as well. I’m trying not to think about it too much, though, at least not until there's actually something between Jordan and I. Until then we are nothing more than just two people who practice soccer together and ride in the same car to school, right?

  OCTOBER 6TH-MONDAY

  This week is about to get crazy! I mean, I thought I knew how important the next few games are, but it didn’t really hit me until today. It started when Jordan asked me about it this morning in the car. I struggled to even roll out of bed after all the soccer last night, so I was worried I looked the part as well. I tried my best to do my hair and makeup enough that it looked like I was somewhat awake, and I guess it worked.

  “Of course the soccer star is fine after last night,” Jordan joked when he got into the car. “I feel like my whole body is falling apart, and you look like you could do it all again right now.”

  “Not quite,” I assured him. “I’m going to be feeling it tonight for sure!”

  “I bet,” he nodded. “This week's going to pretty tough for you ladies.”

  “We’ll be fine,” Skyler said, turning in her seat to join the conversation. “As long as we keep doing what we're doing and take down North Lake on Thursday then it'll be pretty smooth sailing the whole rest of the season.”

  I nodded in agreement, without really knowing. Thankfully Ross turned up the radio and I got out of saying anything else about it. I felt kind of lame not knowing how hard North Lake could be, or what the rest of the season might look like. When I got to practice, though, I found out just what Skyler was talking about.

  “Get ready ladies,” Coach Gary warned us while we were stretching before practice. “Tonight isn't going to be fun.”

  Talk about the understatement of the year! I was so tired by the time we were done with warm-ups I wanted to fall over! We did a lot of sprinting, and then would follow it up with longer distance runs so we had to go from super-fast to more of a paced running for a longer period of time. It wasn't easy, and even some of the girls on varsity were having a hard time keeping up with it all. Once we were done warming up, we did some really hard drills were we had to defend the goal against basically all of the rest of the team or go for a goal against the whole team. JV and varsity were working together, so it was also hard to get used to working with Chelsea and Skyler instead of just Torri or Hayley.

  When practice was over, I thought I'd need to be carried to the car, but I made it home and even got a little homework done before I did something super crazy. I decided to text Jordan! I don’t know why I thought it was a good idea, but I kind of figured if we could hang out outside of school and even hang out without Ross or anyone else with us then it should be okay to text him.

  “I wish I'd practiced with you tonight instead of the team. We must have run at least 6 miles as a warm up before we even got down to drills!” I sent the message before I could change it or overthink every word.

  “Ouch! Well, if it'll make you feel any better, I’m still so sore from yesterday I got tired walking up the steps at school all day. And here you are at practice running and actually doing something other than feeling exhausted!”

  I read his text a few times, shocked that he had replied so quickly! I mean, it had only been about 5 minutes since I sent the text to him, and he was already writing me back. Sure, it could have just meant that he wasn't doing anything, or that he was just texting me so he didn't forget or something, but it honestly still made me feel pretty important and excited. I tried to wait a little bit before texting him back so it didn't look like I was just sitting there waiting for him to reply, and I think I may be managed about 2 whole minutes. Sad, I know, but I was just too excited!

  “Sounds like you need a lot more practice before basketball season starts. We might need to make time for more running on your weekends.” I added a wink emoji and hit send. Pretty much right away I started to doubt the whole text, but it was too late. And thankfully it wasn't too long before Jordan wrote back once again.

  “Works for me. But first you have your big game against North Lake to get through.”

  Once again I felt like he was talking about something that I knew nothing about. I'd heard people mention that Lakeway were good and all, but all day today it was like everyone knew something I didn’t! So, before I even wrote Jordan back, I went online and looked them up. That was more than likely a bad idea since it just made me nervous. Last year, North Lake was undefeated up until the end of the season tournament. JV went downhill from there thanks to some injuries that occurred during the first game, but varsity won every game all day! Then, at state, varsity won against a team that barely made it and just had a really good tournament day. As if that wasn't enough to make me nervous, they've been doing really good all season so far and everyone's already saying that both of their teams were going to make it to state for sure!

  “Better cross your fingers….I don’t know if we can beat them no matter how hard we practice.” I sent the message to Jordan complete with a frowny face then laid down on my bed to basically mope.

  “I don’t know, from where I’ve been sitting during games I think North Lake needs to be afraid!” The addition of a whole string of emojis had me smiling right away.

  “Thanks, but I think you’re just saying that because you helped me practice.”

  “No. I’m saying that because thanks to you both teams are playing like a real team instead of just a bunch of girls that play the same sport. That kind of heart's going to be beat a team like North Lake every time!"

  As if that wasn't sweet enough, Jordan ended it with a heart! I kind of freaked out a lot at that moment, actually making this really lame squeal sound that made me feel like I was back in middle school or something! But I just couldn't help it. I wrote a quick “Thanks,” complete with a matching heart then immediately sent a text update to Corra and Beth. It was kind of weird though when I almost sent a text to Taylor as well. It was this kind of pause moment where I didn’t know what to do. But then I came to my senses, and remembered the fact that she can’t even look at me without a glare on her face, so there's no way she'd want to hear from me. Any friendship between us is clearly over, and I even took the time to delete her from my phone so I wouldn't make that almost mistake ever again.

  OCTOBER 9TH-THURSDAY

  The past three days have been insane! First of all, I've been so busy every time I went to write I either had something come up or I feel sleep! Literally, last night I laid down on my bed after practice to write for a lit
tle while and then before I could even write anything at all I fell asleep!

  So, to play recap, Tuesday on the way to school Jordan and I got to chat some in the car. Basically, he was encouraging me about the game that night against Bradley Prep. It was an away game and since it was going to rain not a lot of people were going to come. I was okay with that since I was super worried I was going to get out there in the rain and get sick again! My mom brought me hot tea to drink as soon as the game was over and I even took cold medicine that night when I went to bed just in case! It for sure helped since I woke up Wednesday feeling great.

  Sadly that feeling didn't last. School was pretty long and Taylor seemed to be going out of her way to glare at me. This might have something to do with the fact that Jordan stopped by my table at lunch today to tell me congrats on the game. He didn’t ride to school with us since he had a doctor’s appointment or something this morning, so he made time to tell me “great job” in person. And I guess when Taylor saw it at lunch it made me her more annoyed at me. I tried not to think about it, though, and honestly by the time I got to soccer practice I'd totally forgotten about it.

  Practice, however, was when the pain really started. We did a few drills, but it felt like all we did was run. We did sprints, we did some distance intervals, and then when practice was over, we had to do a lap around the whole school complex before we could head home. That means after a full two hours of practice we had to end with another 3 miles! It was exhausting and I honestly felt like our coaches were trying to kill us or something!

  Like I already said, when I got home I was so tired by the time I got around to writing I feel asleep right away! And that made school this next morning really hard too. Even since I first broke my nose, I have been doing such a good job of getting up and getting ready and looking nice every morning, but today I was half asleep the whole morning! I brushed my hair and did enough makeup so I looked at least a little cute, but then I actually fell asleep on the way to school! I didn’t even wake up when Skyler or Jordan got in the car. And then, when we got to school, Jordan had to wake me up since I didn’t wake up as everyone started getting out of the car.