by Mahi Mistry
“I am sorry, but I am overwhelmed right now.”
“Don’t apologize for it, love,” he massaged my skin, holding me close. “Tell me, why are you overwhelmed?”
I thought about it. I was overwhelmed because I didn’t expect to feel those emotions rush in as soon as I laid my eyes on him. I was overwhelmed because he knew everything about me, my secrets, read it and didn’t run away when he saw me. I was overwhelmed because I wanted him to be angry at me and push me away, but he didn’t. I was overwhelmed because he had accepted and understood my decision to leave him and told me that it made me into a better person. I was overwhelmed because he missed me. I was overwhelmed because I had missed him more.
Instead, I replied, “We were best friends before it grew into something more.” I paused before whispering, “We lost our virginity to each other.”
“Ah, so you were high school sweethearts?”
“You could say that.”
Jake’s lips curled. I leaned closer, “What? Why are you smiling like that?”
He turned to me, still smiling, but now that smile turned into a sad smile as he tucked my hair behind my ear. “I lost my virginity to my high school sweetheart, too. Unfortunately, it didn’t work out. We both wanted different things.”
Huh, he never told me that before. But again, I hadn’t told him about my first time with Ethan.
I grinned at him, “You wanted to be a basketball champion.”
“Damn, right,” he stopped smiling and cupped my cheek. “Look where I am now.”
I held his hand and snuggled closer to him. “You are one of the world’s best models and one of the sweetest men I know, Jake O’Neal.” Peering into his eyes, I kissed his cheek with a small smile, “I am proud to be getting married to you.”
He stayed silent for a while, watching me with his dark eyes before pulling me closer to his side.
“I love you,” he whispered, kissing my head.
“I love you, too.”
“What? More books?” Jake asked, shocked when I lifted the duvet and the cover of my bed and pulled out the boxes of my books which I had kept underneath the bed because I had no space to keep them.
“How many more are there? Should I check the attic?”
I snorted, opening up the box. “We don’t have an attic in the apartment, Jake. Come on, help me with them. You promised you would.”
He huffed and sat beside me on the floor. “I was thinking more of finding your old pictures, diaries, and even lingerie.”
His look was heated when he whispered the last word, making me shiver.
“I already packed most of them except my lingerie and books,” I replied and awed at the old Harry Potter book set my mom had bought me on my birthday. It was old but still held so many memories. Memories of me and Ethan sprawled on my bed or my bedroom floor reading books together, guessing each other’s Hogwarts house.
It was Friday afternoon. As the classes were over before noon, I had called Jake over to help me pack all my stuff for the move. Anya would have helped, but she was in her office and had called in to make sure Jake and Andrew were behaving.
“Is that Harry Potter?!” Andrew exclaimed, rushing into my room and leaning down to see the books with his big brown eyes.
I grinned at him and let him see the books. “My mom gifted it to me when I was ten.”
He grinned at me, “No way! My mom gifted it to me too. I love Ron Weasley!”
Our book fangirling came to a stop when my cell phone started ringing. As I was on the floor, Jake passed it to me from the dresser. Not before seeing the name flashing on the screen and raising his brows at me. I saw the name and my heart came to a halt.
I picked it up, “Hello?”
“Hey, Bella, what are you doing right now?”
My cheeks burned under Jake’s eyes as I replied, “Oh, um, I am packing my things and books with Jake. I have to move into his house next week.”
Ethan didn’t reply for a second, and I heard a shuffling on his side. He finally said, “Oh, that’s good. I called you to meet up with you. We can do this later if you’re busy.”
I almost forgot about this. Okay, I am lying. I didn’t forget about this. We had been texting each other since that gala, and even Jake was happy that we both were getting back on speaking terms. Jake presented the idea of meeting up with Ethan and catching up with him, so we had been planning to meet up even though I turned into a nervous wreck whenever I saw a text from Ethan.
This was the first time he called me.
I looked at Jake who was smiling at me with a raised brow and he mouthed at me, ‘Call him over.’ I stared at my fiancé and back at the phone in my hand.
Taking a deep breath, I pressed it back to my ear and said, “I-if you don’t mind, why don’t you come over?”
God, I sounded like a nervous teenager asking her crush to hang out at her place when her parents were away.
I held my breath and waited for Ethan to reply.
“To your apartment?”
Even he was confused by my offer.
“Yes, if you want.”
I could hear the smile in his voice when he said, “Text me the address, I will be there in half an hour.”
I sent him the address and exhaled a deep breath after keeping my phone aside. I waved off Jake’s grin. “Stop smiling like that.” I paused and narrowed my eyes at him. “Why do you want me to get along with him so bad?”
Jake came closer and pinched my cheeks until I batted his hands away. “Because I know he is important to you, and I know he is a good man despite what the media says. I would like you to have him as your friend because our wedding is next month, and I have already invited him.”
I knew that, we had already talked about it. I also knew how many tabloids turned him into a person he was not. Yes, he had a wonderful taste in dating a new woman every month, but that didn’t mean he was a heartless player. Not once had I read an article that his relationships were bitter with any of the women he dated. Paparazzi only shared what they wanted with their audience to feel about him. He had a bad rep as he had punched one of the famous reporters, Richard something. But I knew he wouldn’t just go around punching reporters for no reason.
Ethan arrived at the apartment sooner than expected, and it was Andrew who opened the door, exclaiming, “Hey, Kiara! An Olympic Swimmer is at our door. And he is asking for you.”
“Andrew, let him in! He is my friend.”
My cheeks were warm with blood when I introduced Ethan to him, who was inspecting Ethan as if he was a new species. Jake and Ethan exchanged a few pleasantries while I tried to focus on going through my books and deciding which ones to keep and which ones to donate.
Ethan helped me and exclaimed when he picked out the classics we had read together for our English assignments. The pages were annotated with both of our messy handwriting.
“God, I hated reading classics,” he said, closing yet another book and keeping it in the growing pile.
“I thought you were always excited to read the next one as soon as we finished one.”
Ethan looked at me, his blue-green eyes warm in the sunlight splattered across my room. He gave me a small secret smile and said, “It’s because I loved reading them with you.”
My breath hitched in my throat hearing his words. I stared at him while he picked up another book from the pile. I didn’t know that teenage Ethan was excited to read classics because he read them with me.
I did not like knowing that.
I heard Jake pick up his phone and looked at him as he stopped taking out my jewelry and accessories from the drawer. I frowned when he ended the call and looked at me.
“You have to leave?” I asked, trying to hide the fact that he would leave me with Ethan alone, even though Andrew was in the living room, playing video games.
Jake nodded, pocketing his phone and came closer to me and pecked my cheek, “Sorry, sweetheart, I have to meet my agent for an urgent meeting. Don’t
wait up for me, I will call you as soon as I can.”
I didn’t like the sound of that, but I agreed because he had taken a month off for our wedding, so work was piling up for him, and he wanted to get it done before the end of this month. Jake left. Ethan and I went back to talking about books, organizing them and laughing at the old times when we used to read books together.
He told me how he and Liam were friends again, how he and Liam made it to the Olympics. How Jake met him and presented the idea of doing modelling on the side and how it worked out for him.
I told him how I moved to London, finished my bachelor’s and my debut novel. How I impatiently waited to hear from a publisher for a year while doing small, odd jobs in London and moved back to San Diego when I got the book offer. How I became a teacher and wrote part time and how it worked out for me.
I sighed, dropping the last box of books in the corner of my room which looked empty without them and turned to Ethan who had helped me arrange them and tape the boxes.
I wanted to hug him like old times. Instead, I said, “Thank you so much for this, Ethan. You are staying for dinner tonight. Anya Wu makes a mean chicken satay and you will love it.”
He flashed me a grin. “You know me, Bella. I love free food.”
Ethan and I played video games with Andrew, who was more than excited to win every round against us. Anya arrived home cursing at a racist client she had to deal with.
“Oh, wow,” she paused and looked at Ethan who was sitting beside Andrew with a gaming console in his hand. “And who must you be?” She asked, keeping her hand on her hip, giving Ethan her mom look.
No matter how handsome the guy was, she wouldn’t get wooed unless she was sure that her son was safe and sound in good care. I knew because her parents had shunned her as soon as she told them she was pregnant at the age of seventeen. I had tried to get her dates, play her wing woman, but it never worked because she was always worried about her son. Still, in the past I had seen handsome men leave her room when Andrew was staying with her sister.
“Mom, he is my new friend, Ethan. Do you know he is Kiara’s childhood friend? He even swims and has two moms and a sister. How cool is that!”
I smiled warmly looking between him and Ethan whose face was flushed. God, even at twenty-five, he blushed just the same. It was adorable, and I wanted to pinch his cheeks. I quickly scolded myself for having that thought. No. No pinching cheeks.
I knew Anya had accepted Ethan to be around her apartment when she told him to stay over for dinner. I had to excuse myself from them because I had a video call therapy session with my therapist, Sabrina Young. Ethan’s face was hard to read when I announced that.
By the time the session was over, I felt lighter, like I did every time after a session. I had told her about Ethan, and after listening to me, her suggestion was to talk to him.
Great.
When I stepped out of my room, Anya and Ethan were in the kitchen. They both paused and looked up at me as if I had interrupted their important talk. I narrowed my eyes at her while she smirked at me and showed him how to marinate the chicken. I asked her if she needed any help, but she denied. Ethan just gave me a warm smile, making my gut churn.
How could he still smile at me like that after I left him?
Dinner was served on the dining table and we all thanked Anya for it before we tasted the delicious satay. Ethan sat across from me, beside Andrew, while Anya sat beside me.
“So, I heard you punched a reporter.”
I coughed and swallowed the food before glaring at her. Ethan seemed to be amused by it.
“Yeah, I did,” he shrugged and looked at Andrew who stared at him with wide eyes. Poor kid had the same reaction when his mother explained to him that Santa wasn’t real.
Ethan cleared his throat and added, “I punched him because he was harassing a woman.”
His dark eyes flickered to me when he said the last words. I clenched my hand in a fist under the table. I didn’t know that there was a woman involved when he punched the reporter.
My friend smiled at Ethan, “I am glad you punched him then. So, that’s why your image is bad right now in the media.”
I kicked her leg underneath the table, but she kicked me right back. What was she up to? Why was she grilling him with questions? This was none of our business.
“Ethan,” I said, “You don’t have to . . .”
He flashed me a small smile, “I don’t mind, Bella.” He looked at my friend and answered, “You are right, my sponsors have paused my endorsement deals until I volunteer for some community service.”
I talked to him about the charity for kids fighting cancer and that I had their office card too. I had yet to pay them a visit, so taking a deep breath, I asked him if we could go there sometime together.
“Andrew, didn’t you complain about the swimming coach needing help for your school?” Anya asked and then looked at me, “Didn’t you say this too? That the swim coach was going on her maternity leave?”
“I did, she is already on her maternity leave, so Mr. Davis is looking for a swim coach to fill in for a few months,” I explained.
Then it struck me. When I saw the mischievous glint in Anya’s dark eyes.
But I was too late.
I snapped my head at Ethan, and he was looking at me, searching my face for any emotion while Andrew exclaimed, “Wait, Mom, Kiara! Ethan is a swimmer, right?”
“Why don’t you ask him, Son?”
“You are a swimmer, right, Mr. Ethan?” he asked politely.
Ethan smiled at him, his cheeks flushing, “Yes, I am a swimmer.”
“Then can you be our swim coach?”
Ethan turned to me, raising his brow. Then Anya and Andrew looked at me. When I didn’t give in, they tried harder with their puppy-dog eye looks.
I sighed as if it was my decision when it clearly wasn’t. My lips curled into a small smile. “I will give you Mr. Davis’ number and talk to him about you.”
Andrew cheered and started rambling how he was going to tell Ben and every one of his classmates that he knew Ethan and that he was my close friend. I hid my face with my hair when he said that and focused on eating. But I could feel Ethan’s warm gaze on me.
It was late when I stepped out of the elevator with Ethan to bid him goodbye. The night air was chilly. It was a polite thing to do, and I needed to thank him for today.
“Are you sure about me being a swim coach?” Ethan asked.
By the tone of his voice, I knew he thought he wouldn’t be able to do it or might be a bad influence on the kids. My heart tugged at the vulnerability behind his voice.
I grinned at him and nudged his shoulder, “Of course, E, you will be a great swim coach, and I am sure Mr. Davis would accept you in a heartbeat. So would the kids.”
He gave me a relieved smile, and when he opened the door of his car, I told him to wait. Without thinking, I leaned closer and wrapped my arms around him.
“Thank you for today, Ethan. I missed you.”
His arms embraced me tightly, and I felt his lips on my hair, kissing it. “I missed you too, Bella.” He pulled away to cup my cheek and my breath hitched in my throat at the intensity of his piercing blue-green eyes. “Promise me you won’t leave again.”
I squeezed his hand on my cheek, “I promise, E. Never again.”
As soon as those words left my mouth, I knew I would keep this promise no matter what happened. Ethan was important to me. Losing him once had wrecked me, and I didn’t want to go through that again. He meant too much to me, even after all these years. He was still one of the few people who truly knew me, understood me and accepted me for who I was. So, for him and me, both, I wouldn’t even dream of leaving him again.
“And this is the swimming pool . . . as you can see,” I said, watching Ethan’s eyes light up when he noticed the pool and the bleachers.
It was the next day after our dinner and Ethan had agreed to join the parents’ meeting in the school, becaus
e somehow in the span of a few hours, he could be the school’s interim swim coach. He had picked me up after lunch. Jake still hadn’t called. I had sent him a voicemail in the morning, but he hadn’t replied.
Ethan walked around the empty swim hall, his hands in his pockets. “It reminds me of our school,” he whispered to himself, a small smile playing on his lips.
“Yes, it does,” I said and walked toward the side to show him the locker room and the small office, keeping far away from the pool, because if I tripped in these heels, I was sure I was going to ruin my beige dress which I had chosen just for the parents’ meeting.
“These are the male and female locker rooms. Mr. Davis said you can take over this office for the time being.”
The office was small, but it had a desk, shelf, and in the storage room behind it, all the necessities for swimming.
“It’s small, but you don’t have to use this if you don’t want to. You can come over to mine whenever you want,” I said, turning around.
A small gasp escaped my lips when I saw how close Ethan was standing. I swallowed the lump in my throat when I noticed his familiar cologne. The mild musky scent with cinnamon and something woodsy. When I trailed my eyes over his black shirt, which was stretched across his broad shoulders, I found his dark eyes pinned on me. It took my breath away. I forced my legs to stand and not tremble when he stared at me like that.
He took a step closer to me, my chest brushing with his shirt, and stepped around me to look around the tiny room. I released the breath I was holding and fixed my dress, noticing how big Ethan looked in the office.
I tucked my hair behind my ear when he surveyed the desk and smiled at me, “It’s perfect. Thank you, Kiara.”
I returned his smile, my heart beating faster than before. “You don’t have to thank me for it, Ethan.” I glanced at my wristwatch. “It’s time for the parent-teacher meeting. Are you ready?”
“As ready as I can ever be.”
All the kids were seated beside their parents while Ethan and I stood beside each other behind the table of the classroom. Every teacher had to explain the syllabus regarding their subject. I had just finished explaining my syllabus for this semester and also told the parents how they could help their kids with their academics without pressuring them into studying more.
