The Pirate Who's More Terrified than Ever

by Annabeth Bondor-Stone

  “But—”

  Before Margo or Shivers could say another word, Dana started banging on her tambourine as loud as she could, shouting “LIMBO TIME!” over and over again. Everyone on the beach abruptly stopped what they were doing and eagerly formed a line, their faces brimming with anticipation.

  Margo turned to Shivers. “The key to stopping Captain Crook must be in that treasure chest! We have to win the limbo!”

  “I don’t even know what limbo is,” Shivers said nervously.

  “IT’S THE GREATEST GAME ON EARTH!” Dana shouted. “You stand in a long line, then you walk under a stick!”

  Shivers was confused. “And then what?”

  “If you don’t touch the stick, you get to stand in line again! You’ll love it!” She grabbed Shivers and Margo’s hands and pulled them over to the group.

  Margo knew how much Shivers hated lines. Droplets of sweat were already forming on his forehead. She could see from the noses on his bunny slippers that his toes were twitching. And then they brought out the broom. Dana held one end while Carl from the cargo ship held the other end.

  “AAAAGH!” Shivers screamed. “Not a broom!”

  “Shivers, how can you be afraid of brooms?” Margo asked. “You love mops!”

  “It’s not the same thing at all!” said Shivers. “That’s like comparing apples and oranges, peaches and plums, popcorn and . . . unpopped corn!” He winced. “A broom is like a mop that shriveled up and died!”

  Shivers tried to step out of the line, but Margo pulled him back in. “Come on, Shivers, we can do this! We need to do this!”

  Shivers let out a deep sigh as the line began to move. One by one, the happy partygoers wiggled under the broomstick to the beat of the steel-drum music. Some were just able to duck their heads under, while others collapsed in the sand, laughing. As Margo and Shivers moved closer to the front, Shivers’s broom doom swept him into a frenzy.

  “I’ve got to stay as far away from that thing as possible!” he squeaked.

  “That’s the whole point,” Margo said. She bent backward and waddled under the broom. But it was harder than it looked, especially while carrying Albee in his bag. Margo lost her balance and came crashing down in the sand.

  “Oh, no! Albee pulled you down!” Shivers cried.

  “It’s the water weight!” Albee huffed, swimming in a circle.

  Margo stood up and dusted herself off. “It’s up to you, Shivers!”

  Shivers took a deep breath and tiptoed over to the broomstick. As he got closer and closer, he was filled with terror at the sight of the wooden handle and the spiky bundle of straw. His eyes widened. “The only thing a broom is good for is giving a scarecrow a high five!” He threw his head back and sprinted under as fast as he could.

  “I did it! I did it!” Shivers cheered. “What do I do now?”

  “Get back in line!” said Dana. “Isn’t this fun?!”

  With every round, Dana and Carl lowered the broomstick, and more and more partygoers got out of the game. But not Shivers. A lifetime of screeching and flailing had made him quite flexible, and he was so afraid that the broom might give him a splinter that he avoided it at all costs. Soon, the line had dwindled down to just Shivers and a circus performer named Pierre whose big tent had caught the wind during storm season and sailed him all the way to the Bermuda Triangle. The broom was barely a foot off the ground. Pierre stretched backward as far as he could. But apparently the circus isn’t what it used to be. He couldn’t get low enough and his head hit the broom.

  “I’ve been conked!” Pierre cried.

  Shivers just had to clear the broom one more time and he would win the limbo. The crowd looked on to see if his scrawny legs would bend under the pressure. They chanted, “How low can you go? How low can you go?”

  Shivers bent back as far as he could. For all the times he’d been scared stiff, his spine still had some bend to it. As he wobbled under the broom, a single bristle nearly brushed the brim of his feathered pirate cap.

  Margo thought fast. “Shivers!” she yelled. “A broom is a witch’s favorite mode of transportation!”

  Shivers arched back even farther and screamed, “THIS IS AS LOW AS I GO!” He wiggled his way past the broom with nothing but sheer terror keeping him up.

  “We have a winner!” Dana announced. The crowd burst into applause.

  “It was a clean sweep!” said Albee. But his wit went unappreciated.

  Dana held out the treasure chest, and Shivers looked inside. It was packed with junk. He pushed aside giant pink plastic sunglasses, feather boas, and bags of candy. Finally, all the way at the bottom, he found a big silver key.

  “I GOT IT!” Shivers declared, waving the key above his head.

  “I didn’t even know that was in there.” Dana laughed. “Everyone always goes for the giant sunglasses.”

  Margo rushed over to Shivers and hugged him with joy. “You did it!” She placed the silver key securely in her pocket. “Now let’s get out of here!”

  A confused murmur rippled through the crowd.

  Dana’s face fell. “You’re . . . leaving? But you just got here! The fun is just getting started! I know—let’s play Twister!”

  “What’s Twister?” Shivers asked.

  “It’s a game where everyone gets tangled in a big knot until they fall over,” said Dana. “You’ll love it!”

  “We really have to go,” said Margo.

  Pierre pointed at Shivers. “I know the problem! He’s too tense!”

  “What you need is a relaxing massage,” said Dana.

  “What’s a massage?” Shivers asked, backing away.

  “Everybody grabs your arms, legs, and back, then pinches you as hard as they can. You’ll love it!”

  The partygoers held up their hands and closed in on Shivers, looking like a pack of bears about to maul him. They mashed his measly muscles and smooshed his squishy shoulders. One lady massaged Shivers’s feet with her hands while another massaged his hands with her feet.

  Margo could tell that Shivers didn’t find this very relaxing, because he was crying, laughing, and screaming all at the same time. It sounded like this:

  Margo grabbed Shivers by the arms and pulled him out of the crowd. She felt like she was dragging a giant noodle.

  “Thanks, Margo,” Shivers panted. “That was awful. The message in a bottle was terrifying, but at least it wasn’t a massage in a bottle.”

  Dana hurried over to Shivers. “You’re still not having fun? I know just what you need!” She darted away, then returned leading a giant horse by its reins. “A soothing horseback ride!”

  “Huh?” Shivers sat up and looked at the horse, which was snorting and stomping. Its dark eyes were as big as blackberry pies.

  “It’s the most fun thing in the world!” said Dana. “We’ll hoist you up onto the hairy back of a two-thousand-pound animal, then send it running down the beach while you try your best not to fall off! YOU’LL LOVE IT!”

  Shivers let out a scream so high-pitched it sounded like air escaping from a balloon. Then he tore off across the beach in such a panic that he looked like a balloon escaping from air. He took a sharp turn and ran toward the swimming pool. As soon as he burst through the gate, the lifeguard barked, “NO RUNNING NEAR THE POOL!” and blew his whistle as hard as he could. Unfortunately, right next to the lifeguard was a woman reading in a lounge chair. The shrill noise was so alarming that she screamed and flung her book in the air. It landed in front of a tennis coach who was pushing a cart full of balls toward the court. The book snagged one of the wheels and tipped the cart over. Bright green tennis balls spilled out everywhere. It looked like a lime tree had exploded.

  The tennis balls rolled down to the bottom of a grassy hill where there was a small group of people in the middle of a yoga class. Unfortunately, it was a yoga class for beginners, so everyone had terrible balance. They tripped on the tennis balls and crashed into each other like sweaty dominoes. The yoga teacher tried her be
st to stay on her feet but she stumbled backward and fell into a golfer who was teeing off on the first hole of the golf course. The golfer swung his club wildly and sent the ball sailing off in the wrong direction. The golf ball flew over the beach all the way to the ocean, where it bounced right off a Jet Skier’s head. The Jet Skier teetered from side to side.

  “Did it just get dizzy in here?” he said. Then he fell into the water, leaving the Jet Ski without a driver. The out-of-control Jet Ski zoomed up onto the beach. It plowed through the volleyball net, ripped down the hammocks, and then collided with the tiki torches, which tipped over and set the entire buffet table ablaze, melting the ice cream, burning the biscuits, and over-roasting the chicken. The broomstick got burned, the steel drums were smoldering, and even the basket of tambourines was torched to a crisp. The party was officially over.

  Shivers, Margo, and Albee stood in stunned silence, staring at the destruction.

  Dana marched over to the pool, clutching her straw hat. “What. Have. You. Done?!”

  “Um . . .” Shivers slowly backed away.

  Every single person on the island scowled at him with fury.

  Margo called to Shivers, “I know I say this every time we go on an adventure, but . . . RUN!”

  They both sprinted toward the Groundhog as fast as they could, kicking up clouds of sand behind them. The angry mob chased after them.

  “Margo, help!” Shivers pointed down at his slippers. “My bunnies can’t go any faster!”

  Margo spotted the horse up ahead, grazing on a patch of golf-course grass. “Then we’re going to need a faster animal!” She grabbed Shivers’s hand and jumped onto the horse.

  “Margo!” Shivers wailed as they landed in the saddle. “Didn’t you see the rules at the pool? No horseplay!”

  Margo kicked her heels and shouted, “Giddyup!”

  “No! Giddydown!” Shivers screeched as the horse bolted across the sand.

  Margo held on to the horse’s mane. Shivers held on to Margo’s ponytail. Albee held on to the hope that one day he’d just get to relax in his bowl. The horse skidded to a stop in front of the Groundhog. Shivers and Margo raced onto the ship and raised the sails as quickly as they could just as the mob reached the edge of the shore.

  As the Groundhog crashed through the waves, Shivers and Margo looked back at the crowd. The expressions on their faces suddenly shifted from anger to confusion. It was like a spell was being lifted.

  Dana blinked and shook her head. “Wait a minute. How long have we been here?”

  “I don’t know! I was so caught up in all the fun!” said Carl from the cargo ship.

  “I haven’t seen my wife in months!” one guy said.

  “I missed my kid’s graduation!” said another.

  “Oh no!” a woman cried. “My parking meter expired six years ago!”

  The crowd dispersed. Everyone returned to their ships and prepared to head back to wherever it was they came from.

  Back on the Groundhog, Margo steered straight out of the Bermuda Triangle. Actually, it wasn’t really straight. It was a twisted, curvy, wobbly, swervy way out—anything she could do to keep the boat as far away from all the eels as possible.

  AS THEY SAILED BACK to New Jersey, Margo and Albee had the wind at their backs while Shivers had the wind in his face. But that’s because he was facing backward. If he faced forward, he might have to face his fears, and that was one ugly face. Earlier today, he was certain that the Bermuda Triangle would be the most terrifying place he went, but now Margo wanted to go someplace even scarier: Captain Crook’s ship.

  Margo could see that Shivers was terrified.

  “Don’t worry, Shivers! We have the key to stopping Captain Crook!” she said, pulling the silver key out of her pocket. “All we have to do is sneak onto his ship, figure out what this key opens, and defeat him! The hard part is over!”

  “Well, then when does the soft part start?” Shivers moaned. He really wanted to take a nap.

  It wasn’t long before they heard the clucking of New Jersey’s famous sewer chickens and they knew they were close to home.

  “If Captain Crook is going to attack New Jersey, he must be around here somewhere,” said Margo. She took a pair of binoculars out of her backpack and handed them to Shivers. “Any sign of him?”

  Shivers looked through the binoculars and screamed, “AAAGH! A tiny ship!”

  Margo sighed and flipped the binoculars around.

  “AAAAGH! A HUGE ship!” he screeched.

  Captain Crook’s ship was anchored just up ahead. Shivers recognized the rotting black hull and the iron lock painted on the sails. “Margo, this is a bad idea! If Captain Crook catches us, he’ll feed us to the jellyfish. . . . We’ll be sleeping with the stingrays. . . . We’ll go to whale jail!”

  “Shivers, we’ve made it this far.” She grabbed him by the shoulders. “Remember, if you want to conquer your fears, you have to face them head-on. And I’ve got a plan. But first, we have to disguise the ship. Quick, Shivers! Lower the flag!”

  Shivers lowered the Groundhog’s flag, which was a picture of a big smiley face, while Margo grabbed a marker from her backpack. She scribbled out the smile and replaced it with a frown.

  Shivers shook his head. “I do not like the message that sends.”

  “It’s only temporary,” said Margo. “If we’re going to defeat the people-hating pirates, I’m afraid we’re going to have to pretend to be people-hating pirates.”

  “But that looked like a permanent marker to me,” said Shivers.

  Margo ignored Shivers and turned her attention to the gleaming grand piano in the middle of the deck. “The piano is too suspicious. We need to cover it up.”

  “I’ll get my shower curtain,” Shivers said proudly. “I’m never using it again anyway.”

  As Shivers draped the shower curtain over the grand piano, Margo raised the new flag back up the mast. “Okay, we’ve disguised the ship. Now, we have to disguise me—”

  “I’ve still got my peacock costume from last Halloween!” Shivers said excitedly.

  “As a pirate, Shivers.” For as fierce as Margo was on the inside, she still looked like a ten-year-old kid on the outside, with her sneakers, T-shirt, and bouncy brown ponytail. “Do you have any extra pirate clothes?”

  “Just these,” Shivers said, pointing to the clothes he was wearing. “The rest are all jammies.”

  “Okay, then. I’ll have to get creative.” She took off her backpack and dropped it at the helm. Then she flew down the stairs to the main deck and dashed into the kitchen.

  Shivers followed, curious to see what she was going to do and also hoping to grab a quick snack in the process. Margo grabbed a dish towel and tied it around her head like a bandanna. Then she found a box of raisins in the pantry.

  “AAAGH! Zombie grapes!” Shivers screamed. “What are you going to do with those?”

  “Check it out,” she said, shoving the raisins onto her teeth so it looked like they had rotted right out of her mouth.

  “Gross”—Shivers recoiled—“but effective. You’re really starting to look like a pirate.”

  “Speaking of looking . . .” Margo said. She looked in the fridge and found a piece of baloney, which she taped over her left eye so it looked like an eye patch . . . kind of. It would have to do.

  She put on her most menacing face and marched back outside as they were drifting into the shadow of Captain Crook’s enormous ship. They were just a sword’s slice away from the black rotting hull. It was anchored to the ocean floor, rocking back and forth slowly.

  Shivers’s teeth began to clatter with concern. “What if Captain Crook sees us?”

  “Don’t worry, Shivers. It looks like the coast is clear,” said Margo.

  There wasn’t a pirate in sight on the deck of the ship. Margo hooked a rope onto the railing, grabbed Albee’s bag, and climbed aboard in no time.

  Shivers followed, gripping the rope so tightly that his knuckles turned white. Once
he was close enough, Margo grabbed him by his pirate coat and yanked him on board.

  She looked around the empty deck. “Where’s Captain Crook’s evil pirate crew?”

  Shivers clasped his hands together. “Maybe they decided they don’t want to be pirates after all! Maybe they gave up and got new jobs like teachers and bankers and popcorn-ball makers! Why don’t we sail to the beach and check?”

  Just then, Margo spotted movement at the helm, all the way at the other end of the deck. It was Captain Crook. His long, crooked fingers cast long, crooked shadows in the evening sunlight. Next to him was his first mate, Spitball. Her wiry hair stuck out in every direction and even from all the way across the deck, Shivers could see the menacing look in her wild eyes. They were deep in conversation, pointing at the coastline.

  Margo pulled Shivers behind a barrel of old fish carcasses that said LEFTOVERS. “Get down, or we’ll be spotted!” she whispered.

  “Oh no! I never want to be spotted!” Shivers squeaked. “I wouldn’t mind being striped, though. I love zebras.”

  Margo wasn’t listening. “Now’s our chance! Let’s make our way inside and start searching!”

  Margo, Shivers, and Albee scampered across the deck, trying to stay as low as they could. Margo opened a rickety door, and they entered a long, dark hallway. The only light came from a flickering candle that was placed inside a skull.

  “Yikes.” Shivers shuddered. “This guy needs a new decorator.” He peered into umbrella stand that said USED SWORDS. “Wow, the crew must make a lot of hamburgers. Their swords are all covered in ketchup!”

  “That’s not ketchup . . .” said Albee.

  “Over here!” Margo said, standing in front of a door at the end of the hall. Carved into the rotting wood were the words CAPTAIN CROOK’S QUARTERS—COME IN! (IF YOU WANT TO DIE!).

  Margo took a deep breath and slowly pushed open the door.

  Inside, there was a large wooden desk topped with pelican quills and squid ink. Captain Crook’s bed was covered with a salmon-skin quilt, and the bedposts were made of blue coral.