The Rancher's Return

by Kathy Douglass

  “Okay.” He dumped a handful of cookies into a paper towel and refilled his cup. “See you later, Donovan.”

  “I expect to see that cup in the sink before the night is over,” Raven said as Elias sprinted from the kitchen.

  “I know. You will.”

  “He’s a terrific kid,” Donovan said when they were alone. “You’ve done a great job with him.”

  “It wasn’t me alone. My parents did most of it when he was a baby. I didn’t have a clue how to care for him. I was barely able to care for myself.”

  “Because you were stressed out about me?”

  “Yes. It wasn’t until I realized Elias was turning to them to get his needs met instead of me that I knew I had to do better. It was a struggle to hold myself together enough to be the mother he deserved, but I did it.”

  Donovan stared into his lemonade before taking a swallow. “I hope I didn’t overstep about the movie. I’m just trying to find a way to fit in his life.”

  “Not at all. You’re his father. You belong in his life. The fact that you’re just as invested in superheroes as him is a bonus. My father wouldn’t know the Green Lantern from the Green Hornet. In fact, I doubt he’s heard of either of them.”

  “And Carson?”

  His question was tentatively asked, as if he was worried about stepping on her toes again. They might have had a good dinner, but neither of them was sure of their footing. It would take time for them to find their way. “He wasn’t really a fan. That won’t be an issue in the future. He ended our engagement.”

  “Because of what I told you?” He sounded shocked and guilty.

  “No. Not at all.”

  “Then why, if you don’t mind my asking? Karl Rivers was a murderer, but from what I could tell, Carson is nothing like him.”

  “He’s not.” Raven was too confused about everything to discuss the matter any further. She and Carson had done the right thing by ending their engagement, but she still felt bad for having hurt him. “I’d prefer not to talk about this, if you don’t mind.”

  “No problem. I understand. I know we’re only beginning to rebuild our friendship but I’m here if you want to talk.”

  “Thanks.”

  Donovan drained his glass, stood and put his dishes into the sink. “And on that note, I’d better get going. We both have to get up early tomorrow.”

  She followed him to the door and stepped onto the porch. It was a nice night, so she might just sit outside for a while. He seemed unsure of himself, lingering on the porch for a moment before descending the stairs. He looked back at her before getting into his pickup and driving away.

  She crossed the porch and sat on the cushioned love seat. She’d been aghast when her mother had replaced the old, familiar porch swing with this new furniture. After spending a couple of quiet evenings out here, she’d seen the wisdom of her mother’s way. The furniture was very comfortable and relaxing and Raven found herself spending more time out here than she had before. Best of all, the chest that doubled as a table provided precious storage, holding one of her mother’s handmade quilts for cooler nights.

  Tonight, though, she only wanted to enjoy the tranquil evening. The sun had set and the stars were becoming visible in the indigo sky. Lightning bugs flittered in the growing darkness. This was her favorite time of the day. She loved the tranquility. Elias was ensconced in his room, happily reading one of his many books, and she had some time alone. Usually that would be enough for her to relax, but tonight there was a nagging sense of disquiet.

  She’d expected to feel a bit sad about her broken engagement and she did. Carson had been a good, supportive friend and he was hurting. Deep down she knew they’d done the right thing. He deserved a wife who would love him with her whole heart. A wife who wanted his love and devotion. Raven wasn’t that woman and never would be. Ending the relationship would give him the opportunity to find the right one.

  Now that things had been set right between them, she should be at peace, but she wasn’t. It didn’t take long to recognize the source of her unrest. She’d just spent the last few hours with him. Donovan Cordero. She’d been restless since he’d come back into her life.

  She’d often dreamed of the day he would return, but nothing was the way she’d imagined it would be. In those dreams, they’d taken one look at each other and fallen into each other’s arms. Nothing close to that had happened. Okay, she’d gotten a little bit woozy and he’d carried her to the couch, but that didn’t count.

  Her dreams had never included anger and resentment. She hadn’t even known she’d harbored those feelings until they’d consumed her. She’d been glad to have him back, but she’d resented him for staying away for so long. Now that she knew it wasn’t by choice, most of the resentment was gone, but a stubborn remnant held on. Hopefully she could shake it soon.

  In her fantasies, she’d never accounted for the fact that they would be different people. Ten years had changed them. Of course, maturity caused some of the differences. But they’d lived different lives and seen different things. They hadn’t shared a single experience in ten years. They were more different than they would have been had they been together the past decade.

  Yet different or not, there was something about him that appealed to her. A certain elemental something that called to her on a basic level. But was it real? Was the part of her that had refused to let go of him manufacturing the attraction? Was she trying to convince herself that they belonged together because she’d spent a decade waiting for him to come back to her? She didn’t know. But she was old enough and wise enough to know that pretending they were still in love would be a mistake.

  The truth was, despite their agreement to put the past behind them, it was still questionable whether they would get along. Right now they were being polite, feeling each other out. Would they even like each other after they set down their company manners? If the answer was no, co-parenting could become difficult.

  That was enough thinking. She’d worry about the future when it arrived. The present was complicated enough. She headed into the house and the distraction of the television. Hopefully she would find something compelling enough to remove every thought of Donovan Cordero.

  * * *

  “What are we going to do today?” Elias asked.

  Raven sighed. This was so unlike her son. Generally he found ways to entertain himself. He was either helping her father or reading. Kenny had gone to visit his grandparents on the last day of school and would be there until the end of the week. Elias had other friends, but most of them lived in town, an hour away from the ranch. The youth center had a lot of activities for kids, but again it was in town. Raven didn’t like the idea of leaving him at the youth center all day, but it didn’t make sense to spend two hours in the car if he was only going to spend a few hours there.

  “What do you want to do?” He was old enough to come up with ideas of how to occupy himself.

  “I was thinking we could go for a horseback ride. We haven’t done that in a long time.”

  His definition of a long time differed from hers. They’d gone riding just last week. But since she did enjoy riding with him, she didn’t quibble. She could fit in a ride and still get her work done. “That sounds like a plan. Get changed and meet me in the stables in fifteen minutes.”

  Elias was dashing from the room before she’d finished her sentence. He was just as crazy about riding his horse as he was about superheroes. He’d grown bored of riding on the acres near the house, but he was too young for her to consider letting him ride to the far reaches of the ranch by himself.

  She rummaged through the refrigerator and pulled out leftover fried chicken and cold cuts. In under ten minutes she put together a large lunch then met Elias in the stables. He’d saddled Evening Dream as well as his horse, Dark Knight, and was holding them by the reins.

  As they mounted their horses s
he asked, “Which way do you want to ride today?”

  He didn’t hesitate but pointed toward the Cordero ranch. “That way.”

  She hadn’t ridden that way since the night she’d forced her heart to say goodbye to Donovan. Of course, that goodbye had turned out to have been a bit premature. She wondered if her letting go of Donovan and his unexpected return were somehow linked. She shook her head. That was a crazy idea.

  “Why not?”

  “What? Oh, I wasn’t saying no to you. That’s a good idea. Let’s go.”

  As they went, Raven took time to actually look at the ranch. It really was beautiful. She might be biased, but their ranch was the most scenic in all of North Carolina. The grass was a deep shade of green and the trees were mature, filled with thousands of leaves. There was nothing but untouched beauty as far as the eye could see.

  After about twenty minutes they came upon several deer drinking from a stream. A ranch kid used to being exposed to nature, Elias stopped talking so as not to startle them. The deer continued drinking for another minute or so. When they’d had their fill, they ran away, disappearing into the trees.

  “Do you think Donovan is home?” Elias asked out of the blue.

  “I guess. He’s working on his family’s ranch again.”

  “We should stop by. He might want to ride with us. And you brought a lot of food. We could share our lunch with him.”

  “Their ranch is really big. We might not be able to find him.”

  “Can we try?”

  “I don’t see why not. But remember, even if we do find him, he might not be able to hang out with us. He has work to do.”

  After riding for a while without seeing him, Raven was going to suggest they turn around. Then she saw him in the distance. He was sitting on a stallion, talking to two ranch hands who were repairing a fence.

  Raven took the opportunity to get a good look at him. Majestic wasn’t a word she normally used, but it suited him. Dressed in a light blue button-down shirt that looked tailored for his muscular torso and well-worn jeans, he could have been a male model in an ad for the outdoor lifestyle. His hat partially obscured his handsome face, but she could see it in her mind’s eye.

  When he finished talking, he turned and spotted them. He smiled as he expertly guided his horse in their direction, quickly closing the distance between them. He and his horse moved as one. It had been so long since she’d seen Donovan on a horse that she’d forgotten what an expert rider he was.

  “To what do I owe the pleasure?” he asked when they were close enough to communicate without yelling.

  “We’ve come to invite you to lunch,” Raven said. “That is, if you have the time and haven’t eaten yet.”

  “No, I haven’t eaten. And yes, I always have time for you.”

  Raven’s heart stuttered although she believed he probably meant her and Elias, not just her. “Great.”

  “Did you have a particular destination in mind or were you just looking for a good place to sit down?”

  “We were looking for you,” Elias said.

  “Is that right?” Donovan shot Raven a sly grin before turning to their son. “Looks like you found me. I haven’t had time to just ride for the fun of it since I got back. I visited one special place my first night back, but that’s about it. Every other ride has been work.”

  Raven’s stomach tumbled as the thought of the night she’d gone to their place. She did a quick calculation in her mind and determined that he’d been at their spot on the same night. What would she have done if she’d seen Donovan that night? What would he have done? Did it mean anything that both of them had felt drawn to the spot? The idea was too complicated to think about now.

  “Do you have any other special places?” Elias asked.

  “Too many to choose from. Maybe we can make a special place just for us three.”

  “Yeah,” Elias said.

  They went silent and she realized they were looking at her and waiting for a response, so she nodded.

  They began riding away from the Cordero family home in a direction that led farther away from the more traveled part of the ranch to a hilly area. The terrain became more rugged and steep and they slowed down so that the horses could pick their way more carefully up the incline. Donovan was leading the way with Elias right behind him and Raven bringing up the rear where she could watch him. Not that she needed to worry. Elias was a good rider. More than that, Donovan was keeping an eye on him, as well.

  After a few minutes they’d reached the top of the hill. From this vantage point they were able to see the vast expanse that was the Cordero ranch. Cattle grazed in the distance, looking like dark specks against the green grass.

  “Wow,” Raven said, sliding from her horse. “This is what I call a view. I’d forgotten how beautiful everything looks from a distance.”

  “Me, too. While I was away I tried to picture the ranch. Sometimes I could, but I could never capture the feeling that came from being here. As time went by, I lost the ability to remember what it looked like. There was only one place that I could picture.”

  “Here?”

  He shook his head. “You know better than that. Our spot. Sometimes I could see it so vividly I felt like I could reach out and touch our tree. Touch you.”

  Donovan reached out and caressed her arm. Though her blouse had long sleeves, she felt the heat from his fingers. His eyes met hers and held. The heat in them startled her and she took a step back. He immediately dropped his hand and turned away. A second had passed before she realized he’d interpreted her moving away as rejection. It wasn’t. Before she could correct him, he’d walked away and struck up a conversation with Elias.

  Perhaps it was for the best. She didn’t know what she was doing and she certainly didn’t want to further complicate the situation. Not only that, they hadn’t told Elias that Donovan was his father. They needed to do that soon. At first she hadn’t trusted Donovan, but that fear had been put to rest. She’d also been concerned that Donovan and Elias might not get along, but that clearly wasn’t the case. After they’d gotten over their initial wariness, they’d clicked. She didn’t foresee any problems with telling Elias the truth. She’d make sure Donovan agreed before she said anything.

  Donovan and Elias found a spot they determined was just right for lunch and took it upon themselves to unpack the food. Donovan spread the quilt she’d packed on the ground and gestured for her to take a seat. As she approached, he smiled and whatever distance she’d unintentionally put between them vanished. She decided to enjoy the moment and not worry about what would happen between them. If there was one thing the past had taught her it was that she wasn’t in control. No matter how carefully she planned, life took unexpected twists and turns. It was better to buckle up and go along for the ride.

  * * *

  Donovan watched Raven from the corner of his eye. She was nothing if not a bundle of contradictions. One minute she was keeping him at a distance and the next she was inviting him to dinner or showing up for a surprise lunch. For a moment today, it had been like old times. When they’d been younger, she’d often brought him lunch while he was repairing fence along their shared property line. Of course in those days, she’d have been just as likely to be working alongside him. She’d always joked that he’d starve if not for her. He’d been trying to win her heart, so he’d never told her that he’d had lunch in his saddlebag.

  Elias grabbed his plate, then wandered away to watch the cattle.

  “Don’t go too far,” Raven called. The wind blew her hair into her face and she brushed it behind her ear impatiently. Raven was so beautiful, but didn’t seem to notice. Or maybe she did know—she’d be blind not to see how gorgeous she was—but didn’t care. Appearances had never been the most important thing to her, not hers or anyone else’s. It was what was inside that mattered to her. What the heart held that was reflected
in a person’s actions. That’s what Raven cared about.

  Those things mattered to Donovan, too. A pretty face could mask an ugly heart. But he wouldn’t say that Raven’s outward beauty didn’t appeal to him. Her unblemished dark brown face, with high cheekbones, bright, clear brown eyes and full lips entranced him. And when she flashed a smile, he couldn’t help but notice her straight, white teeth.

  Her slim, curvy body with her firm bottom and slender legs was perfect. He’d seen plenty of women in his lifetime, but none had come close to comparing to Raven. True, he hadn’t been in a position to start a relationship, but even if he had been, he’d known that none of the women could ever measure up to Raven. Over time he’d convinced himself that he’d inflated her appeal. Like the fisherman recounting the story of the fish that had grown larger with each retelling, he’d believed that Raven had become more beautiful each time he thought of her. He’d been wrong. If anything, he’d underplayed her beauty.

  Although he wasn’t ready to commit to anything—there was still too much of the past lingering in the air and too much uncertainty about the future—he was beginning to wonder if his teenage self hadn’t been wiser than he’d known. Maybe Raven was not only more wonderful than he’d remembered, maybe she was the person who was right for him. Perhaps she was the person he could fall in love with again.

  Then he recalled the way she’d recoiled at his touch. He might be considering rekindling their relationship, but she certainly wasn’t. Touching her had been like grabbing a live wire. It had been electric. Sparks had shot through his body all the way to his toes. He was amazed that his hair wasn’t standing on end. What had been such a thrilling thing hadn’t affected Raven at all. At least, not positively if the way she’d moved away from him had been anything to go by.

  But then, she’d been engaged only a few days ago. Carson had been the one to end the relationship, not her. Perhaps she was still in love with him and hoping they’d get back together again. It was possible that Raven believed that once he’d dealt with his shock and horror they’d reunite.