When Fake Changed Everything

by J P Sayle

  “You win. I give in.” Even as I said it while laughing, I tucked the jeans back into the bag, away from his hands and danger.

  I followed him out of the bedroom, making sure I didn’t leave him with my stuff. You couldn’t be too careful; he could be sneaky sometimes.

  Sitting on the couch in my preferred spot, I watched him go to the fridge to grab my much-loved beer. The apartment wasn’t big, so they’d left the main room open-plan. The kitchen was tucked into the back of the apartment and was separated off with a breakfast bar.

  The modern décor left me cold, with all its sleek lines and white walls. I much preferred my small log cabin, which was homely with its warm colours. Though Jamie had put his stamp all over the apartment, with bold colours and matching soft furnishings, it still wasn’t my thing. I’m probably what you’d class a rough and ready kinda guy. Not at all smooth and sleek like Jamie.

  “Thanks.” I took the beer Jamie offered, my brow rising when he sat in the chair opposite instead of beside me as he’d normally do.

  Pulling the tab on the beer, I took a deep swallow, trying to quell the sudden nerves that tied my gut in a big mess. What was going on here?

  Jamie

  WHEN I SAT DOWN WITHOUT thinking, I realised my mistake. Todd tilted his head, his eyes appraising me.

  My nerves had been playing havoc with my insides ever since I’d opened the door. Everything about Todd was overwhelming and when I didn’t see him for months on end, I forgot how much he affected me. My body was on high alert and it was taking everything in my arsenal not to spring wood and show him what he was doing to me.

  The scent of wood shavings and the outdoors, a smell that was wholly Todd, seemed stronger and more potent in the confines of my tiny apartment. And for some reason I didn’t want to think too hard about, was making me feel all kinds of weirded out. I don’t know who I was kidding, but it wasn’t me. I knew why it was affecting me. It always had. I just liked to pretend it didn’t.

  Ever since Brent had forced me into a corner about the Thanksgiving party, Todd hadn’t seemed to be far from my thoughts. Two weeks and I’d hardly had a wink of sleep, working on figuring out how to ask Todd to pretend to be my fake boyfriend for one stinking night.

  The idea of faking an illness on the night was dicey at best after word got around that the big bosses were coming down from head office. As the PA to the bank’s branch manager, it would not be looked on kindly if I wasn’t there. The bank was the biggest in town and I had worked for them since I left college.

  I’d worked hard to gain the position as personal assistant to the manager. It was upsetting that poor ole Mr. Rigby up and had a heart attack, meaning they’d transferred in Brent Costain. The guy was a complete jerk, and seemed to think that me being his PA included other perks. That included letting the toad touch me whenever he wanted.

  I’d learned to keep him at arms’ length, but this new tack of trying to get me on a date was driving me to distraction. I’d tried saying no, but the man was clearly deaf, or stupid. Probably both. But that didn’t solve my problem. I really didn’t want to try and find another job, especially as PA jobs didn’t grow on trees in our small town.

  “What’s up Bluebell?”

  Nearly melting into a gooey mess at Todd reverting to his childhood nickname for me, I shifted my gaze from the wine I held to Todd. It’s now or never. Never sounds good to me.

  I sighed and took the bull by the horns, or I would have given half the chance. Stop it and get on with it.

  “Would you be my boyfriend?” I blurted it out so fast I wasn’t sure which of us was more shocked. It was a close call. My brain was trying to catch up with my mouth. Had I really meant to say it like that? Yeah, like I didn’t already know the answer to that.

  “You want what?” Todd’s eyebrows were now nowhere in sight, and the shock in his voice made any hope I might have stood a chance with him wilt faster than my shirt in the summer heat.

  His chest heaved like he couldn’t get enough air into his lungs and made me quickly explain, “No I mean fake boyfriend, not a real one. I mean, I know that’s ridiculous. You wouldn’t want me as a real boyfriend. I just need a date for a party. My new boss is hassling me about going out and I’d avoided it until this party was mentioned. He was insistent I go with him and I might have said you were my boyfriend and coming to visit, so I’d have a date.” I found myself licking at my lips, unsure if my rambling was making matters worse.

  Todd’s face now resembled a mask I’d seen on the TV of an Egyptian king. All stiff and full of a mixture of colours that on Todd, wasn’t all that pretty. My shoulders seemed fixed up somewhere by my ears and I wasn’t convinced my own skin colour looked any better than Todd’s.

  My mouth opened and his hand lifted, stopping me cold.

  “Keep quiet for a minute, Bluebell. I need a second to work through what you just threw at me.” His raised hand moved to rub at his chin.

  The sound of rasping bristles drew my attention to his lower face. It was Todd’s tendency not to shave for several days. My mind wandered off to a place it shouldn’t go and decided to think about what those bristles would feel like against my smooth thighs.

  My dick twitched and it took all my effort not to rock my hips forward when I noticed Todd’s gaze was riveted to mine. Had I been projecting my thoughts? Todd often said I could talk without saying one word and that I was easy to read. I prayed he’d not been able to read me now, because that would suck and not in a good way. Especially when he was taking so long to think about what I’d said.

  My stomach started to hurt, so I took another sip of my wine with the hope it would quell the nerves.

  When the silence continued, I couldn’t hold myself back. “If the idea of being my fake boyfriend for a night has you thinking this hard, then forget it. I’ll find someone else to go with me. I’m sure there is someone who wouldn’t mind being seen out with me,” I choked out, close to tears. I sniffed and wiped at my damp eyes, willing myself not to cry.

  I never saw him move, but the next thing I knew, Todd was crouched in front of me, placing my glass down on the table by the side of me, and taking hold of both of my hands. I sniffed again and blinked twice before my eyes stopped swimming with tears. “What?” I demanded in a huffy tone that sounded way too watery for my liking.

  “If you cry, I might just have to spank you. You know I’m no good when you cry. It makes me feel like a useless lump.”

  I couldn’t help but point out, “You are a useless lump,” even as my butt clenched at the idea of his hands on it.

  His head tilted back and he roared with laughter, making my insides quiver with need. His face lit with such pleasure, it made his chocolate eyes glow with happiness.

  His smiling eyes left me breathless and giddy and there was fuck all I could do about it. I was as defenceless against him as a child who had been introduced to ice cream for the first time.

  “Thanks for agreeing with me, Bluebell, but it stopped you cryin.”

  It took a second to realise he was right. I no longer felt the urge to blubber all over him. I wanted to do other stuff all over him, but blubbering was no longer in that equation.

  I sniffed, “You think you’re pretty clever?”

  “I know I am. So can we get back to the fake boyfriend thing?” He put such emphasis on the fake, almost spitting the word out like it tasted bad, my belly somersaulted as if it was full of jumping beans.

  Did he not want to be fake boyfriends? Or was it the idea that it was fake that made him say it that way? Get over it! He would never want to date me. Would he?

  There was that blasted question, and my heart yearned for the answer to be yes. But deep down I knew that was never going to happen. I was too… everything, for someone that wanted a simple life in his cabin in the woods.

  Don’t you want a simple life, where the one person that’s always been there for you, can love you all the time?

  I cringed at my own head askin
g such a stupid question, at how needy it made me.

  “Why do you need a fake boyfriend for this one night? Won’t it look suspicious if your boss doesn’t see you with me all the time?”

  Not sure what he was getting at, I asked, “What do you mean?” My lips pursed as I tried to figure out where he was leading me.

  “I’m here for a couple of weeks. Surely, we’d be going on other dates? I mean, if you told them I was here visiting for a vacation, I’d be taking you out, right? If this guy is hassling you that much, he needs to see you out and about with me to stop him getting any ideas.” Even though Todd spoke quietly there was underlying steel in his tone.

  There was something going on in his head, I could see it. His mind was working something out. He got these really cute wrinkles at the side of his eyes when he was figuring stuff out.

  I nodded, “I suppose so. But I wasn’t sure you’d be up for one night of pretence. I never considered faking it for more than that. Though it definitely could work in my favour if we were seen out on a few dates.” At the thought of going on a proper date with Todd, a wave of giddy excitement poured through me, leaving me a little breathless.

  Not a proper date, fake boyfriend remember!

  Not listening to my inner voice trying to put me on a downer, I grinned at Todd. “Let’s do it.” The agreement left my mouth and I prayed I wasn’t going to live to regret my own eagerness.

  Todd

  I ROLLED ONTO MY BACK, sleep evading me. How had I got myself into this mess? Easy answer, when I let my dick take charge of my mouth, for pity’s sake!

  What are you supposed to do when your best friend flashes his baby blues at you and says he wants to be your boyfriend? Fake boyfriend, it’s not real.

  But by god, I wanted what Jamie had blurted out initially to be real. I’d thought I’d died and gone to heaven for a moment, till he’d rushed in and ruined it. I was lost in my happy place, my ability to talk gone. Then he’d explained it was a fake boyfriend he wanted. Not a real one, and not me.

  I shifted, the sheets rumpling under my ass from all the restless tossing and turning I’d been doing as I huffed out a sigh and stared up into the inky blackness. The heavy-duty curtains Jamie had bought to block out the street lights doing their job.

  I blinked to make sure my eyes were actually open. It was so dark. I wasn’t used to it. At home my curtains would be open to allow the moonlight to pour into the room. This darkness was a little unsettling. Like that’s the only reason for being disconcerted.

  Choking back the exasperated laugh bubbling up inside like a mini-tornado waiting to cause havoc, I took some shallow breaths. Seeing that it wasn’t going to help, I rolled off the bed and hesitantly took several steps to where I thought the window was. Feeling along the wall, I pulled open the curtains and let the street light flood the room. The brightness was enough to light the room and leave my eyes watering for a second.

  A little dazed, I stood blinking, my mind taking the time to circle right back to where I didn’t want it to go. What was I thinking? Dates! Shit, real dates, where we go out in public together. A shiver raced down my spine.

  How was I going to stop myself from revealing how I really felt? I cursed under my breath and stared out of the window, gripping the window ledge. For years I’d managed to hide my real feelings, keeping a safe distance. All so we could remain friends and I wouldn’t lose the one bright light in my life.

  Groaning aloud, my mind searched for a way out. After several minutes, my shoulders sagged, my heart tripping all over itself. There was nothing for it, I was going to have to honour what I’d suggested. Who stupidly proposed more than one date? Me, it would seem. Oh stop!

  Raking my hands through my hair, a sudden thought hit. I didn’t have any suitable clothes for the kind of party we’d be going to. It was bound to be a formal occasion. I cursed Jamie, “You shitter.”

  That meant one thing: shopping.

  My blood turned to slush in my veins at the thought of what that involved with Jamie. Oh lord almighty, I was in for it now. I walked on unsteady legs back to the bed and sat before I fell down. Sweat broke out all over my body at the thought of going near a shop with Jamie.

  I had only ever been stupid enough once to agree to go with him, and I’d burned the memory from my brain. The torture was too great to recall. How was I ever going to survive a shopping trip to the mall?

  I flopped back on the bed and shut my eyes, willing myself home and the vacation to be over, like now. This was not going to end well.

  At least you’re not worried about revealing your feelings now.

  “Oh shut the fuck up,” I muttered under my breath, praying the voice in my head would keep its opinions to itself, though I didn’t hold out much hope.

  My thoughts from the night before resurfaced as I dragged my feet behind Jamie, who was on a mission to improve my education on clothes shopping. The moment he’d come into my room this morning, intent on rifling through my clothes, I was screwed. Hung out to dry so fast by my obvious lack, my head still hadn’t caught up.

  Whoever said coming to visit your best friend was a great way to relax, had lied. We were on the seventh shop and I still had no shopping bags to show for it. Nothing fitted. Either I was too big or the clothes were all wrong.

  If they fitted me then Jamie hated them. I couldn’t see anything wrong with them.

  “I can hear your mind droning on all the way over here. Those pants were awful, the cut was all wrong and don’t get me started about the shirt.” He shuddered and took hold of my hand, pulling me into the next shop.

  I wanted to beg when the cute shop assistant wiggled his tight little butt over to us, his eyes appraising us both. He definitely found me more than wanting, when his lip curled up in what could only be described as disgust at my clothes.

  “Good afternoon gentlemen, can I be of any assistance?” The guy’s gaze roamed over me again, this time with a spark of interest when he eyed my body. I cowardly stepped behind Jamie, only too pleased to see him give the guy a back off smile he’d learnt from me. The one I’d made him perfect to see if it helped keep the bullies away when his tiny fists did nothing.

  “My boyfriend needs a new outfit for a party we’re attending for Thanksgiving. I was thinking of a suit, but a pair of pants and a decent shirt would work as well. He’s so muscular you might struggle with a suit to fit his broad chest.” As he said it, Jamie’s hand ran down my body, his beaming smile turning on me before he gave a flirty wink.

  This is not real. This is not real.

  It didn’t matter how many times I repeated it, the ball of lust curled low in my gut didn’t want to listen. Any chance I could keep control of myself appeared to have stayed with my common sense, in the car park, with my truck. There could be no other reason for why I allowed my feelings to take control.

  I swooped down and claimed his pouty lips. The fruity taste of his lip gloss was my first taste of his mouth. Then he opened and it was all Jamie. The sweet taste of him filled my senses until it left me breathless and gasping for more.

  Too mindless to figure out who was making the whimpering noises, my arms wrapped around Jamie’s small frame and pressed him to me. The overriding need to delve into him overtook everything. Dark desire pulsed and thrummed through my body so fast I was lost on how to stop it.

  A loud cough infiltrated past the lust, pulling me back to my senses… just. I glanced over to the sales assistant who was watching us with envy shining in his eyes.

  “This is a department store, not a…”

  “We’re well aware of that. My boyfriend struggles to keep his hands off me, don’t you Pookie Bear,” Jamie said in a breathy voice I’d never heard him use before.

  My mind, not having recovered from the kiss, was trying to process what Jaime was saying.

  When it struck me he’d used some stupid name, my eyes narrowed on the cheeky ass. What the hell? Pookie bear, what was that all about? My head must still be stuck in the
clouds because there was no way Jamie would call me, “Pookie bear—”

  A small hand covered my lips before I could get another word out. The softly scented palm rubbed at my now sensitive lips, causing my dick to imagine how it would feel to have those fingers wrapped around me. Gulping, I closed my eyes willing away the images. Oh this was going from bad to worse.

  Pull it together, get the clothes and then get the hell out of Dodge. Solid plan, now all you have to do is stick to it. No more poking your tongue down Jamie’s throat.

  “We have a section for the larger gent over this way if you’d like to follow me,” the shop assistant said, sounding a little strained.

  I gave him ten out of ten for keeping going when Jamie was still stood with his hand on my mouth, his body all but plastered to my side. I could feel his cock trying to poke a hole in my thigh. Did he like me kissing him?

  He’s hard.

  How had I missed that?

  Because you were otherwise occupied with your tongue down his throat.

  On a sigh, I shut out the voice that was really starting to piss me off and shifted Jamie’s hand. “Come on troublemaker. Let’s see if we can find something you approve of in here.”

  “I already found something I approve of.”

  Having taken three steps, I stilled, before glancing over my shoulder. “What did you say?” I wasn’t sure I’d heard him correctly.

  A sheepish grin covered his face. Shrugging he strolled to me, “Me? I didn’t say anything.” With that, he walked after the guy, a red stain covering his cheekbones.

  Why was he lying? I knew damn well he’d said something. Stomping after him, I kept my distance, not convinced I wouldn’t lose control again if I touched him. My gut twisted when I realised we’d have to talk about my moment of insanity. How was I going to explain away the kiss?

  I stopped and plucked at my lower lip. Why wasn’t Jamie losing his shit over me kissing him? My gaze narrowed on Jamie, who was now rifling through clothes racks. Did he want me to kiss him?