Cross My Heart

by Carly Phillips

  A much easier subject, Ty thought. “He’s fine. He’s turned into a stuffed shirt. He’s a suit-wearing lawyer, believe it or not.”

  “So he can argue and stand up for himself legally now. Good for him.” She grinned, obviously pleased and proud of the news. “And you? Did you go to college the way we talked about?” she asked hopefully.

  Ty and Hunter had shared a room while Lilly had a bed in an alcove off the kitchen which Flo had turned into a comfortable nook Lilly called her own. Ty recalled sneaking into her bed one night and they talked until morning—about his mother’s desire to see her son in college and his plan to fulfill that dream. Back in those days he’d been so focused on making his mother proud and repaying her for all she’d given him, he hadn’t let his own dreams see the light of day.

  He still wasn’t sure what those dreams were since his plans were so tied up in his mother’s. Lilly’s hopes for him were based in the fantasy they’d woven as kids. Ty’s life now was based in a different reality.

  “I went to college,” he said. “And then I dropped out.”

  Her pretty mouth opened wide.

  “Now I’m a bartender.”

  She furrowed her brows, her curiosity and disbelief evident. “And what else are you?” she asked.

  “A bartender’s a good, solid job. What makes you think I’m also something else?”

  She leaned in close. “Because you never could sit still, and just tending bar would be too boring for you,” she said, obviously certain she still knew him that well.

  She did. “I’m a private investigator, too. Now are you coming home or not?”

  She exhaled, transforming in front of his eyes from secure female to exhausted woman. “I need time to think about it. And before you push me harder, you should know that maybe is as much of an answer as I can give you right now.”

  “I hear you,” he said, his tone laden with understanding. He figured she’d need time, and since Hawken’s Cove was three hours away, he knew her indecision would mean a night or two in New York.

  He rose and started for the door.

  “Ty?” she asked, rushing after him, dog at her heels.

  “Yeah?” He paused and turned too fast. She skidded to a halt, bumping into him, her hands coming to rest on his shoulders.

  All the questions he’d lived with for ten years were suddenly answered. Her scent wasn’t as sweet as he remembered, it was more sensual and warm, more enticing and inviting. Her skin glowed and her cheeks flushed as their gazes met and lingered.

  She licked her lips, leaving a tempting moistness behind.

  Understanding and yearning mixed together in one confusing yet arousing package.

  “Where are you going?” she asked.

  He’d looked into a local hotel, but thanks to conventions and who knows what else, all the affordable places were booked. He’d packed his bag anyway and decided expensive or not, he’d have to take a hotel room because asking Lacey if he could bunk on her couch seemed like a damn stupid idea.

  “To my car. I need to find a hotel.”

  “You could… umm… stay here,” she offered, her hand sweeping in a grand gesture toward the couch.

  He knew better than to say yes. But he couldn’t deny the desire to spend what little time they’d have together getting reacquainted.

  “I’d appreciate that.” He glanced at the couch, hoping the damn piece of furniture was comfortable. Because having made his decision, he sure as hell wasn’t.

  “Good. I’d like to spend more time catching up,” she said, her voice deeper and more throaty than before.

  Or maybe it was his imagination overloading his senses. It didn’t matter. Ty was in deep trouble, and probably something a whole lot more.

  Lacey couldn’t sleep. Ty was stretched out on her couch, and her traitor dog, who usually slept beside Lacey, had chosen to bunk with her guest in the other room. The worst part was she couldn’t blame the pooch for wanting to snuggle up against Ty’s warm, hard body. She had the urge to do the same thing herself.

  She’d missed him badly, especially in the early days, and seeing him again had opened the floodgates of feelings she’d kept walled off and in check. Her emotions were in complete turmoil. And Ty wasn’t the only reason.

  Memories of her family overwhelmed her, as well. Losing her parents had left a hole in her heart that had never been filled. Certainly her awful uncle hadn’t helped ease the pain. Like Cinderella, who’d lost her father and been left with an evil stepmother, Lacey had been abandoned and betrayed at an age when she didn’t know how to handle it. She hadn’t even had grandparents to turn to, she recalled sadly.

  Her parents had had Lilly later in life and all her grandparents had already passed away. Although her father had two brothers, Marc and Robert, her parents weren’t close with either one. Only Marc, her single uncle, lived nearby. Robert had married and moved to California years ago, so it made sense that her parents left her with Marc. And at least she’d had a recollection of seeing her uncle Marc on the occasional holiday. There was no family on her mother’s side because her mother had been an only child.

  Ironically, the money Ty wanted Lacey to claim had been handed down on her mother’s side for generations. Lacey was the sole heir. There might even be stipulations in the event of her death about the money going to her father’s family. She didn’t know because her parents had rarely discussed the inheritance. Instead, her father always focused on his day job, the auto body shop he owned that specialized in restoring classic cars.

  After her parents’ car accident in hurricane-like weather, Uncle Marc had come to live in her family home and he’d taken over her father’s business. And he’d loved the concept of the estate, the grounds, and playing lord of the manor. Lord of Lilly, she remembered bitterly.

  From the beginning, he’d tried to make her obligated to him in any way he could. At first, he’d been the kindly uncle and she’d fallen for his act. How could she not when at sixteen, she desperately needed someone to count on? But she’d noticed his drinking right away and she’d learned to stay far away the drunker he became. One afternoon she’d come home early from school and heard him on the phone discussing how he needed Lilly to sign her rights to the trust over to him while she was young or else he’d lose his chance to manipulate her in any way. By the time she turned twenty-one, he needed her to trust him enough that she’d sign anything he asked without question. Including the rights to invade the principal on her trust fund.

  Even at sixteen, she’d understood the concept of betrayal, and this was a big one. Anger and hatred had welled up inside her, and she’d decided then to make his life as difficult as possible. She’d become a rebellious teen. He’d responded by cracking down and becoming increasingly abusive in the hopes that she’d back down out of fear. When her behavior didn’t change, he’d carried out a threat she never believed he’d implement.

  He’d had her placed in foster care—temporarily, he’d said—just long enough to scare her. He’d wanted her to be so grateful to come home that she’d not only toe the line, she’d be easy to control, trust fund and all. Thanks to Ty and Hunter, he’d never gotten the chance.

  Back then Lilly hadn’t been concerned with the legalities or with the money since she knew it wasn’t hers until she turned twenty-one, as her uncle constantly reminded her. By then she’d had the beginnings of a life and enough inbred fear of her uncle to remain far away. She assumed the money had remained untouched and had been content to let it stay that way.

  She swiped at the tears that had begun running down her face. Remembering her parents and all she’d lost was never easy, but recalling the time afterward caused her stomach to churn and the old anger and resentment to flare up. She’d gone from her parents’ princess to her uncle’s piece of property, something he could kick out of her own home on a whim.

  That thought cemented her decision. Lacey didn’t need the money her parents had left her. After all, she’d lived without the e
xtras for so long, she rarely thought about them now. But there was no way she wanted her bastard uncle to profit from her parents’ deaths. He’d run her father’s business into the ground shortly after taking over, and he’d claimed ownership of her childhood home. She wasn’t about to let him have anything more.

  Lacey wasn’t vindictive by nature. She had a life here that she was proud of, one she’d worked hard to build and maintain, which had prompted her initial reluctance to return home with Ty. But the thought of her uncle enjoying anything more at her expense churned her stomach nearly as much as thinking about her uncle and her past.

  Ty was right. She’d have to go home.

  Chapter Three

  Lacey climbed out of bed and slipped on her favorite pair of slippers, a fuzzy pair that were soft enough to feel like an old friend. She headed to the kitchen for a midnight snack, tiptoeing on the way, careful not to wake Ty. Careful not to stop and watch him sleep and risk rousing warm feelings for a man she no longer knew, but one she wanted to know again.

  She poured a glass of milk, pulled the Oreos out of the refrigerator and settled into the corner she jokingly called her kitchenette. In reality it was a small table at the end of the entry hall.

  “Mind if I join you?” Ty asked, just as she dunked her first cookie into the cold milk.

  Without waiting for a reply, he sat in the only other chair that fit around the table, Digger curling at his feet. Ty was shirtless, wearing only his partially-zipped jeans, unsnapped at the waist. A low light glowed from the kitchen, casting them in shadows, but even in the darkness surrounding them, she could see enough to admire how broad his chest had become, how drop-dead sexy he was.

  She ran her tongue over her suddenly dry lips. “I hope I didn’t wake you.”

  He shook his head. “I couldn’t sleep.”

  “Me neither. Obviously.” She gestured to her midnight snack.

  “So you resorted to your old standby, cookies and milk?”

  She slowly lowered the Oreo onto the table. “You remember that?” He’d often caught her snacking in his mother’s kitchen late at night. That’s how comfortable she’d been in his childhood home, she thought.

  “I remember lots of things about you,” he said in a husky voice.

  “Such as?” she asked, her curiosity not the only thing that he aroused.

  “Such as the fact that Oreo cookies are your comfort food. You like them cold and hard from the fridge even though you’re just going to dip them into milk and make them soggy. And you keep the cookie in the milk for about five seconds so it doesn’t get too soft. Like this.” While speaking, he reached out, snagged a fresh cookie, dipped it into the cold milk, then held it out for her to taste.

  She opened her mouth and bit down, the cookie partially crumbling, partially melting in her mouth exactly the way she liked it. Her lips brushed over his fingertip, the accidental touch causing an unexpected rush of physical sensation to sweep over her.

  She laughed, keeping things light, and wiped her mouth with a napkin, but what she felt was anything but funny. Her breasts grew heavy and a pulse-pounding awareness thudded through her veins along with a heaviness between her thighs. She managed to suppress what surely would have been an orgasmic-sounding groan. Because somehow her comfort food had turned erotic and sharing memories with an old friend had become something much more sensual.

  From the reciprocal yet clouded look in his eyes, she doubted that had been his intent. He was holding himself back from her now, and she missed the closeness they’d shared when they were kids and they didn’t think things through all that much.

  There had been something special between them, something they’d never acted on, either because they’d been afraid to sever a friendship that represented the only stability in their young lives, or because neither quite knew what to do with what they were feeling. Maybe even back then, they’d subconsciously realized that sex alone wouldn’t be enough.

  Although Lacey had to admit, at the moment, sex sounded awfully appealing. Still, they’d never had the chance to scratch the surface of that first love, leaving them emotionally wanting more. Leaving her wanting more. She never really knew how Ty had felt, whether he’d really liked her or whether he just enjoyed being her hero.

  At least now they were adults, capable of making grown-up choices and dealing with the consequences, she thought. Consequences that for Lacey included Ty showing up when she had an unanswered marriage proposal from another man.

  “Tell me about the time after you ‘disappeared’.” Ty spoke, his voice a welcome distraction from both her thoughts and her desires.

  Apparently he didn’t intend to take things any further, and she found herself feeling both disappointed and relieved at the same time. “Look around you. I’ve done okay.” More than okay, as her business proved.

  But as she spoke, she realized this was the second time tonight she’d defended her small apartment and her life. For no good reason. Ty hadn’t belittled who and what she’d become. She wasn’t used to feeling defensive—usually, she was more than proud of all she’d accomplished.

  Ty’s presence reminded her of the good and the bad things in her past and forced her to face how different her life had turned out than what she’d envisioned as a child. It wasn’t what her parents would have wanted, but given the reasons and the things she’d been through, Lacey felt sure they’d be proud, too. Which was just another reason Odd Jobs meant so much to her. It was something tangible she could point to that proved Lilly Dumont had survived.

  Ty nodded. “You’ve done more than okay, but what I see now doesn’t tell me how you got here.”

  She drew a deep breath. The past was something she preferred to keep there, but as her onetime co-conspirator, Ty had a right to some answers. And just maybe, talking about it would help her release some of the pain she still held inside.

  She glanced down at her intertwined hands, remembering the dark night with too much ease. “I walked for about half an hour and right outside of town, I met up with your friend. The one who’d stolen Uncle Marc’s car. We drove to a place far enough away where no one would recognize me. Then I took a bus to New York City.”

  “Just like we planned.”

  “Right.” But no one had planned beyond that. “I crashed on the bus and when we arrived, it was the next day. I had the small stash of money you and Hunter had given to me. I slept in a YWCA one night, a bus terminal another.”

  He winced.

  She ignored it and kept talking. “I washed dishes and I got by. Eventually I met someone who cleaned apartments. She worked for a Spanish woman who hired immigrant girls. By that time, my hands were rough enough from detergent and water, so somehow I convinced her I could handle the work. That pretty much saved my life because I’d run out of free or cheap places to sleep, and it was getting harder and harder to duck the johns and pimps in the bus and train stations.”

  “God, Lilly, I had no idea.”

  The raw distress in his voice touched a place deep inside her. She didn’t want him holding himself responsible for something he hadn’t caused. He’d saved her life and she’d never forget.

  He reached out and grabbed her hand. Ten years too late, and yet it was exactly what she needed now.

  “None of us did.” She curled her fingers around his, the warmth and strength giving her the motivation to continue. “But things got better after that. The woman who hired me—her name was Marina—let me sleep on the floor in her apartment until I found a dirt-cheap rental.”

  “How bad was it?”

  She hadn’t wanted to upset him, but he’d asked. “The place came with company. There were cockroaches on the walls.” She tried not to gag on the vivid memory. “And a drunk lived next door. He liked to wander the halls in the dead of night. The locks on the apartment door didn’t work and the superintendent ignored my requests to fix it. I couldn’t afford to pay for a locksmith myself, so I’d drag a dresser in front of the door at night for secu
rity.”

  “God,” he said again. He ran a hand over his face.

  She didn’t know what to say, so she remained quiet.

  Finally, he asked. “And what’s your life like now?”

  A much easier topic, she thought, and smiled. “I run a business called Odd Jobs that caters to the working man or woman,” she said with pride in her voice. “I have about fifteen employees depending on the day and their moods. We walk dogs, clean apartments, food shop, whatever the busy person needs us to do. Over time I’ve accumulated a loyal clientele and I’ve been able to increase prices. Things are going pretty well.”

  He grinned. “You’ve made an amazing climb.”

  The way she’d seen it, she had no choice but to keep going.

  “I admire you, you know.”

  His words took her by surprise but warmed her at the same time. Still, she wasn’t looking for his pity or admiration.

  “I only did what I had to do to survive. What about you?” she asked Ty.

  She wanted to know why he had dropped out of college when that had been his goal for so long. And what explained the difference in his tone when he’d spoken of his mother? The shift had been subtle, but she’d noticed it just the same. She wondered what had caused it.

  “Ty? What happened to you and Hunter after I left?” she asked, curious to fill in those years.

  “That’s a story for another day.” He glanced down, and his eyes suddenly widened as he realized he still clasped her hand in his.

  She wished he’d pull her up and into a long, lingering kiss. The kind she used to dream about when she slept in his house, his room a few feet away. And later, the kind that kept her warm at night when she thought she’d go crazy from fear and loneliness.

  Tonight wasn’t the first time she’d seen longing and desire in the depths of his eyes, and it wasn’t the first time she’d allowed herself to let the present disappear. Just like before, when they were together, little else mattered.

  “It’s late and we should get some sleep.” He rose from his seat, lifting his hand away from hers.