As soon as my drink came, I took a deep swallow and felt some of my nerves wash away on the oceanic, tangy tide.
Sterling ran his finger around the rim of his beer bottle. “What’s this about?”
“I need advice.”
“Okay, but advice about what?” He tilted his head. “What’s going on? What happened at the game today?”
“I…” I wasn’t brave enough yet. I took another drink, tried again. “I have been having feelings and I don’t know what to do about it. I want another perspective.”
Sterling seemed to relax. He must have been expecting me to say something disastrous after the way I’d run out here. “I’m always willing to listen. What’s going on?”
This was tricky territory. Not only my own feelings were involved, but also his. I played with speckles of salt on the tabletop, arranging the crystals in patterns. “There’s someone I like, but it’s different than any way I’ve ever felt before.”
“Is it a girl?”
“Uh, no.”
“Is it me?”
I laughed. “No!”
“Then, what’s different about it?”
“I don’t know. I feel stronger than I ever have about any alpha I’ve met in the past. And I hardly know him. That makes me think there’s something really special between us.” My heart twisted. I drank more, trying to fight back against the pain.
“We’re talking about Harrison, right?”
I choked on a mouthful of tequila. “What?” I sputtered.
Sterling shook his head. “Are you kidding me? Next you were going to drop hints about him, like, oh, he’s a basketball player, and he’s older. I’m not dumb, Kade. It’s obvious.”
I blushed hard, guilt burning my cheeks. “I’m sorry. I just didn’t want to be a jerk about it. ‘Hey, I stole your date and I want to keep him?’ You deserve better than that.”
“I prefer honesty over playing games.” Sterling shrugged. “I told you, it’s all cool. Everything’s been sorted out. If you like Harrison so much, you should go for him. After all, he’s on a sugar daddy app. He’s looking for something.”
“But what if what he’s looking for isn’t me? What if it was just a fluke? Or we won’t last?” I bit my lip. “I don’t want to hurt him.”
“So, don’t hurt him,” Sterling said, as if the solution was so easy. “You both have feelings for each other, right? It can’t hurt to try.”
“But…”
“What, you’re going to give up before you’ve even tried?”
I blinked. “Give up?”
“You wanted a second opinion. My opinion, as your friend, and unlicensed therapist, is that you’re trying to find excuses to keep from putting your all into this. You’re thinking what if it fails? But you should be thinking, what if it doesn’t? You really want to miss out on that?”
I sat back, stunned over the amount of truth that had been dropped so unceremoniously onto me. Giving up was what I always did but now, things were different. I was different. I was going to make this happen instead of waiting around and being disappointed when it didn’t. “No. No, I don’t want to miss out on it.”
“Then, go for it. Trust your gut.”
Is that what it comes down to? I asked myself. And then, I answered. Yes. It is. I’ve trusted my gut before. Why stop now?
I wanted Harrison. I wanted him to be mine, to get to know him better. If anything happened to get in the way of that, I could just trust my gut again to tell me what to do. With the two of us working at a problem together, we could overcome anything.
I picked up my drink. “I think you’re right, Sterling.”
“I know I’m right, Kade. Now, to pay your therapy bill, buy me another beer.”
11
Harrison
A kiss I couldn’t get enough of, a kiss that followed me into my dreams and left me sweating and horny in the morning when I woke. Kade’s kiss. His sweet lips, tender body pressed on mine, and the soft pressure of his weight on my lap; sensations right on the cusp of being felt again, yet locked so firmly in the land of memory.
I wanted to feel those things again. He had made me feel like the man I used to be;vibrant and strong and purposeful.
At the same time, I worried. I worried like the man I was, turning the thoughts over and over in my mind until they soured. Aside from another chance with Kade, what had I gotten myself into? Had I set myself up for failure? What if he decided he saw a better opportunity and left me behind him?
Those thoughts kept me from actually doing anything. I didn’t even call him, like I’d said I would. Something about talking to him over the phone seemed... lacking. If I couldn’t look into his eyes while we talked, how would I know he meant what he was saying?
Kade didn’t call me either, though. No doubt he thought the ball was in my court and was waiting for me to do something.
I couldn’t afford to stay in this limbo of indecision. It was time to act, before this situation turned into another misunderstanding.
I went to the next tournament game a few days later and, as expected, found Kade and Sterling as the referees. Knowing they both watched made no difference. I only cared about what Kade thought. I threw myself into the game with everything I had, and more than made up for my lackluster performance last time. All my shots were three-pointers, hardly ever touched the rim of the hoop. I intercepted like a maniac, wove my way with effortless and serpentine grace through the players on the court around me. The kids, sensing my vigor, even if they couldn’t have put it into words, rallied around me and put on their best performance, laughing and teasing each other all the while. Even the audience laughed sometimes at some of the antics going on, laughter that melted into gasps and cheers as baskets were scored, passes were completed, daring maneuvers undertaken.
In the last thirty seconds, the scores were tied. Sweat soaked my skin, dripped on my jersey. The ball flew, an orange projectile. The kids swarmed after it. Someone from the opposing team caught it, launched it in a fierce pass that sailed by the intended recipient. I saw my chance, pushed hard on my wheels, stretched out my fingers. Textured rubber grazed my skin. I knew I couldn’t catch it.
I slapped it, bunting it up in the air like a volleyball player. The thwack of contact reverberated off the walls. The ball sailed, arching up through the air. Heads turned. Eyes bulged. The ball reached its apex, spun on its way down, hit the rim of the hoop, wobbled, and swished through.
The timer went off and everyone in the gym stood up, cheers and howls of disbelief mingling. Someone called, “He bitch-slapped it! Is that legal?”
The kids clamored around me, laughing and slapping me five.
“It’s legal! It’s legal!” Kade shouted, waving his arms. “The basket is good!”
If anything, the uproar in the gym went up several more notches in volume. A dozen hands grasped my wheelchair and lifted me up an inch off the ground. It felt as if I was flying. Not because of the elevation, but because Kade was watching me with a broad grin on his lips.
I grinned back and mouthed, “Stay after.”
He nodded, just once, almost imperceptible. My heart soared and I pumped my fist in the air, laughing. “We won!”
The winning celebrations lasted longer than usual, owing to my brilliant and daring feat of slapping a basketball. The other team was no less happy, congratulating me over and over. Activity surged into a frenzy as people came up to speak with me, equipment was put away, and families left, until, at last, the center was quiet again. No one around except me.
I went in search of Kade and, peering around a doorway into the gym, found him. He held a basketball in both hands, walking up to the freethrow line.
“That’s traveling,” I said, entering onto the court.
He glanced at me, surprise flashing across his face before being swiftly replaced with happiness. “You’re one to talk about breaking the rules! I don’t think I’ve ever seen anyone slap a basketball before.”
I came up
beside him and held out my hands for the ball. He tossed it to me and I caught it. “You said it was legal.”
He grinned and covered his mouth secretively. “Did I say that?”
“Kade!” I said, laughing. “You lied?”
“I didn’t lie so much as omitted the truth. There’s no real rule about it, although in a real game you’d probably be given a penalty for mishandling the ball.”
I tossed the basketball to the side and moved in, sweeping Kade into my arms and onto my lap before it bounced even once. “I’ll give you a penalty,” I teased, looking up into his eyes.
He looked down at me, perfect pink lips parted. He felt so good in my lap, desire sweeping through my body from where his ass pressed on my thighs. “What’s my punishment?” he whispered.
I brought my lips closer to his, murmured, “No punishment. Lucky for you, I like troublemakers.”
He tilted his head down and our lips met between us. What I had been remembering paled in comparison to having the actual thing again. His scent surrounded me, making me feel weak from elation. I rubbed my lips on his, pulling him closer with my hands on his waist, cherishing the feel of him so I could save it for later and remember better than last time. I never wanted to forget his taste, the soft warmth of his mouth underneath mine, the way his lips yielded. My tongue slid into his mouth amidst wet heat. He moaned, breathily, and squirmed his hips around in my lap.
His hands tangled into my hair, tugging handfuls. “Harrison,” he murmured, and thrust his tongue on mine.
Pleasure spiraled through my body, my veins tingling. My toes curled. Any doubts I might still have had were entirely gone now, chased away by building need. I wanted him and I was not going to let anything stop me from having him.
I slid my hands lower, then up underneath his referee shirt. His skin was soft and smooth, silky under my touch. He arched his back and kissed me harder, his tongue rubbing on mine, thrusting, mimicking an act of sex.
My groin throbbed with an almost uncontrollable desire to claim him, my cock stiffening between my thighs. Pressure built, my bulge straining at the front of my pants. The restriction was aggravating and now it was my turn to squirm around, my body craving release.
Kade dropped one of his hands down to my thigh, slid inward, right on top of my cock. He curled his fingers, holding me, causing my muscles to tighten. Heat started to build deep inside me, like a storm cloud on the horizon that signaled a coming hurricane.
“I need you,” I whispered. My nails pressed into his skin. I pulled his body much closer to mine, so that he fit right against my stomach and chest. His mouth met mine again and again, stealing my breath. I forced more words out each time we parted. “I’ve needed you since the gala. ”
Kade looked at me, surprise in his eyes. “Then why didn’t you call me? After the kiss we had and the promise you made, I thought you would have got in touch with me before now.”
Guilt hit me hard. I’d been afraid, stupid. I wouldn’t make that same mistake again, but whatever this thing was between us, it was a two way street.
“You could have called me.”
“I wanted to give you some time to be sure about the promise you made.”
“I don’t need time. Not anymore.”
“Then take me.” He moaned, putting an end to the conversation. He rubbed my cock, pushing the palm of his hand on me. I twitched in his grasp, and the storm cloud suddenly seemed much closer than simply the horizon. My orgasm was coming fast. I could hardly believe how fast. “My apartment…”
“No. Here.” I pushed his shirt up, exposing his back and his sculpted abs. “Here. Now.”
“But… cameras?”
“No surveillance in here.” And thank god for that.
“What if someone comes in while we’re…” Even as he protested, trying to be cautious, he kept rubbing and stroking my cock. I was so erect it was painful.
“They won’t.”
I shouldn’t have promised, but something told me I was right. Some gut instinct, some undeniable moment of foresight I could neither explain, nor question. Maybe it was as simple as wanting to be right. Either way, I felt deep in my heart we wouldn’t be interrupted. The gym was deserted, the center quiet.
We were owed this by some force of the universe, some bit of karmic justice.
Plus I don’t think I would be able to drive properly.
Kade bit his lip. He looked so sexy doing that I kissed him again, thrusting my tongue into his mouth. He thrust his back at me, curled his around mine and sucked, the pull intimate and exciting. I felt my control slip another notch, my muscles starting to tremble from being held so taut. At any moment, I would snap like a rubber band, release the torrential rains held inside me.
Kade slid his touch over my cock again, this time tugging and pulling on my pants. My cock sprang free before he could get to me, as if so impatient to get out that it had taken on a mind of its own. My shaft stood up straight, the very limits of my length revealed and on display for Kade to admire.
But, he wasn’t admiring.
Hands shaking, fumbling, he yanked at his own pants and pulled them down just enough to pull out his dick. He had to stand up a little to do it and, as I watched, my heart melted. His face was red, flushed with need, his eyes narrowed; his expression was one of raw, primal focus, the look of man that hadn’t changed for as long as he had existed. He wanted something, and he was going to get it.
I reached out to Kade and wrapped my hands around his ass, pulling him back onto my lap. I squeezed him, massaged him, and he let out a strangled sort of half-yell, clearly trying not to attract more attention than was necessary. I had no such qualms, was beyond thought, beyond anything but paying the utmost attention to the object of my desire.
My mind was wrapped up in thoughts of him, the world of my senses narrowed down to him. Without him, I couldn’t exist. It was only the sex talking, but damn, it felt so right to feel that way.
Kade held his dick in his hand, bucking his hips softly while his ass moved in my hands. “Now?” he panted. “Now?”
In response, I shoved my hips up and pushed my cock on his.
I hadn’t ever done this before and, from the burning, thrashing lances of pleasure that struck at my core, I knew I had been missing out. Could hardly believe how much I was missing out. His dick was so soft, so firm, so wonderful to fuck on.
My control finally broke. I started thrusting underneath him, bucking up against him, and he responded to my movements and met me with quick, rapid strokes. Static built between us, an electrical charge building in the unstoppable storm front that had taken over me.
I cried out, tossed my head back. Kade grabbed my face in his hands, as he had done when we were outside by my van, and kissed me. His hips bucked faster, his dick thrusting on mine.
I held his ass and pulled him flush against me, grinding my hips against his. Our cocks were trapped between us, pressure mounting, mounting…
Kade lifted up and then shoved his body against mine a final time. Heat burst out of me, climbing up the tube of my shaft, erupting like a lash of burning rain. His cum hit my stomach in return. ushing his face into my shoulder, he strangled his cry of release. I buried my face in his hair, panting while my orgasm rolled through my body, spasms shaking me and shaking me until I thought I might shake myself apart.
Then, as swiftly as it had come, the whirling cyclone dissipated into mist. I collapsed back into my chair with Kade slumped over me, his breath hot and fast on my neck. Little tremors ran up and down his spine.
I touched his back, stroked my hand down to his tailbone. There were raised ridges on his skin where I’d scratched him without noticing.
Marked him.
Kade stirred, letting out a little moan. After a moment, I realized he’d said something. “What was that?”
“Wow,” he repeated. He shook his head, hair tickling my neck. I resumed stroking his back, because I wasn’t sure what else to say in response. “That w
as amazing. I’ve never… had sex like that before.”
Pride formed in my chest. To think that I, of all people, had given him a new experience, was more than I ever could have asked for. “Well,” I said, my voice husky, “we can do it again anytime you want. I sure as hell would love to.”
“Can you…” His voice was quiet, suddenly hesitant.
“Yes?”
“Can you do it other ways?” His cheek grew warm against my neck. He was blushing.
“Yes, I can. I haven’t tried, but I can.” I frowned, my heart pounding with sudden panic. How much was too much to share?
He might not want me anymore if…
Cut it out, I scolded myself. He knows I’m in a wheelchair. How I got here makes no difference.
It was time to be honest, even though it was hard, even though I had never talked about this sensitive subject before.
“It’s my spine that’s damaged,” I said. Kade seemed to be holding his breath. “Not my spinal cord. You’ve seen me move my legs. I’m not paralyzed, but I’m not ever going to run a marathon. I can use them enough to move around from one seat to another. That’s about it.”
“I’m sorry, Harrison.”
I shook my head. “My accident was too long ago for you to be sorry. I live differently, not less. My cock works just fine.”
Kade suddenly laughed and kissed my throat, touching his lips to my skin. Even though I had just came, I felt more heat stirring inside me. “Yeah, it does.”
The awkwardness between us disappeared. I relaxed, rubbing my cheek on Kade’s soft, messy hair. “We should probably get out of here before anyone does come in.”
“I agree.” He tilted his head to look up at me. “I’m going to hit the shower. Do you want to come with me?”
“Of course I want to,” I said. “But there’s something I need to do.”
Sweet Emotion: East Coast Sugar Daddies: Book 1 Page 9
