Fight
Page 17
I don’t think anything can truly change Shaw, but let’s face it, the world is a cruel place.
Who really knows what will happen?
I climb out of the shower and look at my reflection in the mirror of the master bathroom. My bare feet are warmed by the floor, because that’s what rich people spend their money on. There’s a heater in the tile.
Crazy.
I don’t want to sound ungrateful. Of course, I enjoy the luxuries that come with living with Aiden, but I’m not sure this is all me.
I look over at the sparkling dress hanging on the door. Aiden gave me his credit card yesterday and told me to buy something fitting for a dinner at the country club. Like I would know what that means. I have no idea what people wear there, but with help from the saleswoman I grabbed a beautiful sparkling charcoal cocktail dress.
I pull my hair up, leaving some strands down to frame my face before doing my makeup, hoping like hell I can pull off a classy look, before slipping into the fancy dress that cost way too much.
I examine myself in the mirror and smile. I love how the dress hugs my waist and dips low in the front, but not ridiculously so. It goes to right above my knees, showing off my legs, but I have a coat and I don’t imagine being outside too long tonight.
It will be fine.
I walk into the bedroom and slip into high heels just as Aiden comes in, his eyes sliding over my body. I stand and let him see everything, but he doesn’t look happy.
“What’s wrong?”
“Is that what you’re wearing?”
I look down at the dress, smoothing out the fabric over my legs, and then look back up at him. “Yes. You don’t like it?”
He walks closer to me almost snarling, “You smell like that fucking place. I told you to quit.”
I stare up at him, hurt and angry. “I showered.”
His nostrils flare as he looks down at me. “It’s too late to change now. And it’s definitely too late to shower.”
He’s mad that I worked today? Or does he know that Carter stopped by?
I try to shake that off. That’s crazy. For him to know that Carter stopped by he would have to be following me, or having me followed. I can’t keep up with his mood swings lately. It’s becoming exhausting.
“I’m sorry. I thought the dress was pretty.”
His eyes only focus on my face now like he can’t stand to look at the dress again. “I wanted my family and friends to meet my girlfriend, not a cheap hooker.”
I’m overtaken by anger now, placing my hand on my hip and glaring at him. “I would say I’m pretty damn expensive. Wouldn’t you?”
He walks away from me, stripping off his clothes and heading toward the bathroom. “Very.”
I sit on the edge of the bed as he showers, trying not to cry. I won’t let him see me cry. I don’t understand what I did. I don’t know how he can be so kind some days and so nasty the others.
He walks out of the bathroom with a towel around his narrow waist and walks to his closet, changing into a tux. I hate that he’s attractive. Like it would be easier if he wasn’t charming and handsome.
But maybe it would be.
He walks over to me. “Let’s go.”
I shake my head. “Why? If you’re ashamed of me, why do you want me to go with you?”
“I’m not ashamed of you, Shaw. I just think you could have done a lot better. I’m disappointed, but we will handle it. Now come on.”
I stand up, folding my arms over my chest and not budging. “I don’t want to go.”
He looks like he’s losing patience with me. “I got a call from your mother’s doctor today. He wants to put her in experimental steroid therapy. I told him it would be a good idea, but if you’re going to sulk…” he tucks my hair behind my ear, “then maybe I should call him back.”
Bastard.
I swallow tightly, almost painfully, because there are so many things I want to say right now. But my mother’s health is the most important thing to me and he knows that. “Does he think it will help?”
He nods, “He’s optimistic.”
I drop my hands to my sides and try not to clench them into tight fists. “Okay. I’ll go.”
He eyes me with cold suspicion. “And you’ll behave?”
I glare at him, biting my tongue when I really just want to tell him to go fuck himself. Carter doesn’t think I’ll ever change, but I can feel myself slipping away with each argument with Aiden. “Of course.”
He nods and we walk downstairs, putting on our coats and driving in silence to the party. When we arrive, it’s even worse than I imagined. He introduces me to his father, an older similarly handsome version of Aiden, and his stepmother who looks to be the definition of trophy wife.
Not that I can talk.
She can’t be much older than me though, and I don’t miss her judgey glare as I stand at Aiden’s side all night. Listening to stock tips and portfolio shit I have no interest in. I think about Carter being in this same place, eating steak and probably drinking whiskey even if we aren’t of age.
I can hear his laugh and I wish he was here. I wish Dane was here.
I can feel the gazes of the people that look down their noses at me and my skin is crawling with disdain by the time we get out of there.
When we get back home and into our bedroom Aiden removes his black tux jacket, almost too slowly. His eyes looking far too calculating as he takes in my appearance and approaches me.
My heart is thundering in my chest when he stops a foot in front of me. “You will quit that place.”
“Excuse me?”
“You heard me, Shaw. I won’t do this anymore. I’ll take care of you and your mother, pay for your education, but you have to stop this defiance.”
“Working is defiance?” I can’t believe him and I want out of this dress. I unzip it, not asking for his help because I don’t want it.
“Yes, when it’s at that place.” He says it with a disgusted sneer.
I step out of the dress and drape it over the chair, pulling a silk robe over the bra and panties I’m currently wearing. “It was my home.”
He scoffs. “You’re quitting, and if you won’t, I’ll only assume it’s because you want him to know where you are at all times.”
I snap my gaze over to him as he undresses and looks unaffected by my anger. “You are having me followed?”
He shakes his head at me like I’m a child. “Don’t be so naïve, Shaw. Do you really think I would trust you after you had him in my house?”
My mouth hangs open in shock because I really didn’t see this coming. “Nothing happened.”
He nods his head, pulling on plaid pajama pants. “I know.”
“And if I won’t quit?”
He’s a cold bastard, unbothered by my rageful tears that I can’t stop now. “Then maybe you don’t care as much about your mother as I thought.”
I gasp, “Wow.” I take a seat on the edge of the bed. “So I’m just supposed to behave and do what you say?”
“What did you think this was?” He sits down next to me.
“A relationship.”
He laughs at me and it’s cold. “That is a relationship, Shaw. You have a lot to learn, but I provide and you in turn do what I ask.”
I look at him through the tears, hating that I have no idea if he’s right or wrong. I’ve never seen a real relationship in person. It certainly appeared to be that way at the country club tonight. My mother was never married. Carter’s parents weren’t ever together. I have no idea what a relationship looks like.
But right now, all I feel is cold hatred.
“I’ll quit tomorrow.”
He nods, patting me on the head like I’m a good girl. Obedient and docile.
And that’s exactly what I am for him.
“Come on, kid. You have a fight.” I look over at Will as I hold my phone.
“I have fifteen minutes. I need to reach Shaw. I haven’t talked to her for a while.”
He sighs and takes a seat next to me on the bench. “Shaw Hayes, right?”
I nod my head. “Yes. Shaw. The Shaw that Dane told you all about.”
“Right, and also Aiden Sharpe’s girlfriend. Live-in girlfriend no less.” I stiffen and turn to look away from my phone and towards Will now.
“How do you know that?”
His face is grim. “We’re on the Sharpe’s payroll, kid. And have been for many years. Long before I was even here.”
“Payroll for what?” I glare at him, not liking this new piece of information. I thought this douchebag was just another financial planner, suit-wearing motherfucker. Not someone that would need the mob on their side.
He shrugs, “Whatever they need. Protection. Women. Other things…”
“Like hits?”
He gives me a pointed look. Saying he isn’t going to admit to anything. “What the fuck?”
“The Sharpe’s are powerful. They’ve been a big part of Kansas City history and Aiden Sharpe is untouchable.”
I grimace, bile rising in my throat. “Why are you telling me this?”
He places a hand on my shoulder. “Because for whatever reason, kid. I like you. And I don’t want to see you killed because you’re sticking your dick where it shouldn’t be.”
My jaw is clenched tight. “It has nothing to do with my dick. She’s my friend and has been for a long time.”
“A friend that you have no intention of trying to steal away from him?”
I lift my chin in defiance. “Are you telling me that I won’t have your support?”
His jaw ticks and he looks close to being sad. “No. If you fuck with him, it’ll be me in charge of putting a bullet in your head. And I really don’t want to do that.”
I turn away from him and dial Shaw, willing her to answer the video call. I almost give up, but on the fifth ring I see her face.
She looks beautiful, but worn again. Not as bright and happy as she was the last time I saw her. She’s sitting in a chair that has a shelf full of books behind her wearing a tank top that hangs low and loose, and I’m certain she isn’t wearing a bra the way her nipples are poking through the fabric. Her hair is wet and down, and she has a lit cigarette between her lips. “Hi, Carter.”
Her voice is quiet. What the hell is going on? Her gaze is distant in the phone. “What’s wrong?”
I can feel Will tense next to me but I don’t spare him a look. If she needs me, I’m going. I don’t give a fuck if he wants to try to stop me. “Nothing. I’m fine.”
“You’re not fine. Since when do you smoke?”
She laughs, pulling a deep drag from the cigarette and then taking her time blowing smoke upward. “I’ve smoked around you and Dane before.”
Something isn’t right. “What’s wrong, Shaw? Tell me.”
“Nothing is wrong. I’m fine. I just…” Her voice is raspy and quiet as she looks at me through the phone. “I just realized who I really am. And it’s not pretty.”
I shake my head, confused. “What are you talking about? Who are you?”
She laughs, but it’s not happy. It’s almost scary. “I’m a whore. And a good one. A really good one.”
I feel my fingers clench tightly around the phone. “Why the fuck do you think that? Did he call you that?”
I can see Will shaking his head next to me, silently telling me not to get involved but he can fuck off. “No. He didn’t. You see, Carter, those movies I used to love…they’re real. I didn’t realize how real they were.”
“What the hell are you talking about? Do you want me to come get you?”
She shakes her head and I see her putting out the cigarette. “No. I don’t. My mother is getting the best possible care and she’s still alive. We both know that if Aiden wasn’t footing the bill, she’d be dead. And me?” She places a hand over her cleavage that I’m ignoring because I’m so fucking pissed. “I’m going to college. I’m getting a great education.” She shrugs, “All I have to do is suck dick occasionally and spread my legs. I even enjoy it most of the time.”
I feel sick. This is not Shaw. She seems beaten down. Like she’s giving up. “Shaw…” I growl.
She rolls her eyes at me. “Stop. Please don’t act like there aren’t a ton of little boxing groupies doing the same thing for you.”
I ignore that. “You are not his whore.”
She laughs again, sounding bitter and cold. Nothing like Shaw. “I am. And I’m okay with it.” She scoffs, “I’m more than okay with it. I would say I’m getting the better end of the deal. And besides… like I said, those movies are pretty spot on. Except Julia Robert’s character was a little bit stupid thinking that he would ever actually love her. He had the power and she got security. That’s all it was.”
No. This cannot be happening. I stand up looking into the phone at my best friend, trying to find the real her again. “I’m coming to get you.”
She shakes her head at the same time Will stands doing the same. She looks into my eyes. “No. Carter, I’m fine. The price we pay and all that.”
I hate that she’s throwing Dane’s words back at me. “You’re better than this.”
“No. I’m not.” She shakes her head and forces a smile that looks more like a grimace. “This is the life I chose. I’m okay with it.”
“I’m not.”
She doesn’t laugh this time. “I know. You think I’m really okay with the life you chose?” I shoot a glance toward Will and then back at her. “I’m not, but we don’t get to decide what the other one does. Just like we didn’t get Dane out before he was killed.”
Now Will winces.
“Shaw, if you need me, call me.”
She nods her head, but we both know she won’t call. She hangs up and it feels like my heart is going to explode as I sit down.
“You have a fight.”
I nod my head absently feeling half dead. “If he hurts her, I’ll kill him.” I lift my eyes to meet Will’s. “I don’t care what happens to me after that.”
He nods his head knowingly.
“We have to go.”
I stand up, walking out to the ring to perform for the crowd.
Because it’s the price I pay.
I know I smell like smoke and that Aiden will hate it. I also don’t really give a damn. I strip out of my tank top and shorts, slipping into the rose color gown he bought and had delivered for tonight.
He doesn’t let me shop alone anymore, and most of the time just calls the store describing what he needs. They cater to him. It seems everyone does.
Carter looked good in the call, strong and muscled. No doubt about to go into the ring.
I look at my reflection. The gown goes to the floor but has a slit up the side of it going nearly up to my hip. I guess this is classy enough for Aiden.
I would love to say I told him to fuck off and left, but I didn’t. Instead I just accepted my role. Became compliant and stopped being disobedient because the alternative seems worse. I’m tired of struggling to barely get by. And as long as my mother is getting care, I know I can’t fight Aiden.
I’ll do anything for my mother. Anything at all.
And I meant what I said to Carter, it’s really not even that bad now that I’ve decided not to fight my fate. Aiden is good looking and a good lover. Nothing at all like Carter, but still fine. He pays for college and my mom’s treatment. He rarely even hits. He usually likes to limit his abuse to the verbal type.
I was a fool before. Thinking that I had found the fantasy. That a girl like me could have that. It was ridiculous looking back.
I find the silver flask of whiskey I keep in my nightstand and take a drink before tucking it away. I put on some mascara and lipstick before walking down the stairs, seeing Aiden st
ride in. He’s dressed in his suit as usual, but he’s not alone.
“Shaw, there you are. This is my friend, Senator Thomas.”
I glance over the handsome older man next to Aiden, also dressed in a suit. “Hello, Senator Thomas.”
He holds out his hand for mine and I extend my arm out for him. He places a kiss on the back of my hand, and I don’t like the way he’s leering at me. Shouldn’t Aiden be pissed about the way his friend’s gaze lingers on my tits?
He doesn’t look pissed in the slightest. Instead he looks pleased and then pulls me into an embrace where he leaves a kiss against my lips. “I thought we could stay in and eat tonight, Shaw.”
I can feel his friend’s predatory gaze on me and I wish I would have taken a bigger swig of whiskey.
After an almost silent dinner with wine that I took full advantage of, we all go into the living room. I take a seat on the couch and Aiden sits next to me, brushing my hair to the side of my neck, breathing against my exposed flesh. “You look beautiful tonight.”
No. I don’t like where this is going. My neck heats and I see Senator Thomas’s gaze is locked on me. “Thank you. I just did what I was told.”
He grins as his lips press against my neck. “You did a wonderful job. I was thinking you should be rewarded.”
I look over at the senator and then turn to Aiden, uncertainty creeping through me. “What do you mean?”
He smiles, his eyes full of desire that I wouldn’t mind except his friend is still here. “I think you know.”
I shake my head slowly. “I thought you didn’t share.”
He's never done this before and I can’t shake the uneasiness in my gut. I feel his hands on my zipper, lowering it down my back. “I never said that. What I said was… I didn’t want your little friend here without me.”
I snort as he removes the straps of my dress, freeing my breasts as my breathing increases and I can’t tell if I’m horrified or turned on.
What is wrong with me?
I’m grateful for the alcohol flowing through my veins.
“So, you would be fine with Carter fucking me as long as you were too?”