A surge of murmurs broke from the group, no one had ever defied Samuel in this way. But as I observed the council more closely, over half appeared to be nodding in agreement.
Samuel glanced around, aware that friends no longer surrounded him. His face tensed, and he looked back at Aydin, anger flashing in his amber eyes. ‘It appears I may be wrong,’ he said humbly dipping his head. ‘Please accept my apologies.’
I watched Samuel slip to the back—this was not over.
***
The moon completed a full cycle before I spoke to Samuel again. He requested a formal meeting in the Great Hall, conveniently asking to see me when Aydin was out of the palace. More than once Aydin had requested I let him confront Samuel, but I couldn’t prove he’d done any wrong, and his hold over the guard was still too strong. I knew meeting with Samuel alone was dangerous, but curiosity got the better of me, and I went to the Great Hall at the time requested. He kneeled as I entered.
‘Samuel, my dear friend, it has been far too long since we’ve spoken,’ I said, hoping he sensed the irony in my greeting, and that fear was no longer a weapon he held over me.
His lips drew into a thin smile. ‘My Majesty, I must say how well you are looking, you are positively glowing.’ I nodded curtly and sat on my throne waiting for him to continue. He cleared his throat dramatically. ‘I wanted to meet with you to discuss some matters of utmost importance.’
I struggled to keep my face neutral. ‘I’m listening.’
‘Your work has been great, and your people love you ardently, but they have become restless wondering if you will soon marry and provide an heir for our kingdom.’
I almost laughed. ‘This is what you came to discuss with me?’
His smooth features wrinkled into a mildly pained expression. ‘I realize that my Majesty has been very busy, but this is an issue we must address, and as your chief advisor I feel it is something we must settle. Perhaps you already have someone in mind?’
So, this was it, this was his feeble attempt to be rid of Aydin. A million thoughts raced through my head, there was more to this than a simple conversation. Samuel knew I’d no desire to marry anyone other than Aydin, and as an advisor, this was now possible. But Samuel also knew I couldn’t marry Aydin if anything made him unsuitable. A shudder of fear ran through me—did he know something I didn’t? Despite all our time together I still hadn’t questioned Aydin on his past, and he’d never brought it up. I wondered what Samuel knew.
‘Why Samuel, as my chief advisor, shouldn’t I be asking you who’d be a suitable candidate?’
He seemed ready for this question. ‘Well, there is a multitude of noblemen in your kingdom, many of whom live right here in your court.’ His mouth twitched before he continued. ‘Though, there does seem to be one you favor above all others.’
I huffed dramatically. ‘I make no secret of my feelings for Aydin.’
He nodded thoughtfully, with the hint of a grin. ‘You must then be quite disappointed that his suitability for marriage is, shall I say, flawed.’
Damn him, he knew such a comment would enrage me. I tried to slow my breathing. ‘Tell me, Samuel, why would he fall short of any other man in my kingdom?’
He feigned shock. ‘My Majesty, my humblest apologies. I assumed you already knew. I appear to have spoken out of turn. I shall promptly excuse myself and beg your forgiveness.’ And with one quick bow, he rapidly retreated, I could see his pleasure in the way he walked.
Left alone in the hall I wanted to scream. I’d played perfectly into his hands, and he had delivered his final cut with deadly accuracy. I wanted to chase him, to demand he tell me what he knew, but that would have only pleased him more. I sat there, clutching the arms of my throne, till my anger subsided only to be replaced by fear.
I would finally have to question Aydin, and I couldn’t have been more terrified.
***
I waited in my chamber for Aydin to return. We had fallen into a pattern, with all formality lost some time ago. Evenings with him were usually my favorite time, but tonight I was dreading it.
Not long after dark, I heard knuckles rap firmly on my door. ‘Enter.’
He burst in like a force of nature, his dark eyes found me, and he strode across the room pulling me into his arms. The electrifying sensation that his touch always brought, swept through. His embrace was so tight I could barely breathe; his full lips fell with a passion that never faltered, and I felt like we were the only two people on Earth. I was so in love with this man that it physically hurt, and I longed to ignore the conversation of today, but I couldn’t stand another moment without the truth.
I placed my hands on his chest, gently pushing him back. ‘I thought tonight we should spend some time talking,’
His eyes shone as he dipped into a mock bow. ‘I’m at my Majesty’s command.’ He straightened and a mischievous grin shaped his face. Deep creases ran the length of his cheeks joining the lines of his eyes.
I inhaled deeply; I had to keep going. ‘I’ve been wondering for a while now, about your past. I know so little about you.’
His smile faded, and darkness clouded his face. ‘What would you like to know?’
‘Tell me about your childhood, your parents, where you grew up,’ I said, trying to sound enthusiastic.
His head dropped, and instantly he was a slave again. Seeing him like this hurt beyond imagining, and I quickly covered the distance between us to ease his chin back up.
He took my hand. ‘You are my life now. My past is unimportant.’
His voice was like velvet, and I could tell he meant it, but I had to know. ‘Please Aydin.’ He looked at me, his dark eyes imploring me to let this go. ‘Please, tell me.’
He nodded reluctantly. ‘Perhaps we should sit down.’
‘Yes,’ I replied.
I followed him to the nearest couch. He placed my hand on his lap, his eyes were downcast. ‘I was born and grew up close to where you found me,’ he began softly. ‘I’m the son of a fisherman, the eldest of four boys. Life with them was simple. They educated me in the basics and taught me to fish. My mother and father, I hear, are well, and my brothers continue our trade.’
I was a little shocked by his last comment. ‘I’m surprised that they still see the need to fish. Did my guards not give them the money?’ I realized how this sounded and I instantly regretted the question.
He flinched but did not look up. ‘My parents kept very little,’ he mumbled. ‘Most of it went…to my wife and child.’ The world seemed to tilt, I pulled my hand free of his and stared into the distance. He put his arms around me and pressed his mouth to my ear. ‘Please, please let me explain. You need to hear me.’
I was too horrified to do anything. He continued speaking, announcing each word as though trying to force it into my head. ‘The woman I married, was my neighbor. Our parents were friends, and they arranged our marriage the day she was born. As we grew up a special bond form between her and my younger brother, and when I confronted them they admitted their feelings. We went to our parents, to convince them they were a better match, but they wouldn’t listen, and we were married regardless. She was pregnant when I came here, and she gave birth to our son soon after. The money you gave them has provided a good life, better than I ever could have. Last I heard my brother was caring for them in my absence. It was hard for me at first, but now I know coming here righted many wrongs. This is my home now. Here, with you, is where I belong.’
He released me from his embrace and retook my hands. His story had eased the ache, but the flame of guilt was far from extinguished. I turned to meet his gaze. ‘But your son, he doesn’t know you.’
Tears grew in his eyes. ‘That is not entirely true… I have been to see Elijah.’
‘His name is Elijah?’
‘Yes, and he is a healthy, happy, well-loved child. I couldn’t ask for any more.’
‘And have you seen your wife?’
He looked away. ‘I have. But she cries every
time as she is ashamed of her happiness.’
I stared at him—I wanted to believe what he said, but I couldn’t. This was so wrong. ‘Why don’t you hate me?’
His face stilled. ‘You really don’t remember, do you?’ I didn’t know what he was talking about. His lips pulled into a painful smile. ‘The river was my life when I was young. I was there more often than I wasn’t. But the best days were always the ones when you came. My friends and I would spend hours watching you on the boat. They dreamed about having your life, but I didn’t. I always thought you looked, lonely.’ He took a moment to stroke my cheek. ‘One day I saw you staring, and my curiosity got too much. I knew better than to approach the royal boat but I wanted to talk to you, to see if I could make you smile. I dived into the water and swam through the reeds. When I reached the boat, you were above me. You looked even sadder up close. I was about to call to you when someone grabbed my arm.’
My sudden gasp stopped him. ‘That, was you?’ He nodded slowly. I searched his obsidian eyes. ‘The scar on your back…that was where he hit you.’
Aydin’s nostrils flared. ‘But he only hit me once.’
I tore my eyes from Aydin as long-forgotten images flooded back. I could see the young boy being dragged from the reeds; a large man pulling him by the arm. He grabbed a whip from his belt, and I heard myself scream as the leather broke the boy’s skin. I ran from the boat and into the river, screaming at the guard to stop. I could see the man so clearly, his calm smile as he held the boy aloft, his whip raised ready to strike again. I made him let the boy go, and his amber eyes narrowed with disgust.
I looked back at Aydin. ‘Samuel. He was the one who hit you. How could I have forgotten? I hated him for that. I remember now. You were always there, every time we came to the river. Even after he hit you.’
His eyebrows dipped. ‘I wanted to protect you from him, from your sadness, but then you lost your family and stopped coming. I looked for years, but you never came back. Then one day, you were there again.’ His voice deepened. ‘But now it was Samuel who stood by your side, and I felt sick every time he spoke to you. I would’ve done anything to take you away from him.’
‘And instead…I brought you into this hell.’
He paused, the anger melting. He cupped my chin in his hand. ‘Hell could not hold an angel as beautiful as you,’ he whispered.
I shook my head and looked away. ‘I don’t deserve your kindness.’
He coaxed my face back. ‘You still don’t understand, do you? That day I sang, I was singing for you, because it has always been you…that I love.’
***
It was at the end of another tedious meeting, several weeks later, when Samuel finally approached me. ‘I was wondering if you would permit me a moment, my Majesty.’
His voice irritated me beyond belief. ‘Of course Samuel, what is it?’
‘I was wondering if you had given any thought to our last conversation?’
‘I have barely considered it,’ I lied. ‘I’ve been far too busy.’
‘I see, but I assume your Majesty realizes that people will only ask louder.’
This man knew how to get to me. ‘The people will be far too busy adjusting to their new lives to worry about such things.’
‘How I wish this were so, but the masses do love to talk,’ he replied, one eyebrow raised. ‘It is advantageous that the queen does not have to hear the idle gossip of the commoners. Unfortunately, I do not command the same respect, though at times I do hear some interesting information.’
My frustration grew. ‘Very well Samuel, share some of this wisdom with me,’ I said through clenched teeth.
‘Oh, I’m sure even the most interesting of information is still based on falsehood. For example, we all know, your trusted friend Aydin is completely devoted to you. Despite the rumors he has reunited with his wife.’ He spat out the last few words like cold poison.
I’d stepped right into his trap again. Jealousy screamed in the very corners of my soul. Every muscle tensed and his smug face only made it worse. Why was he always a part of the worst moments of my life? I wanted to let it go; I wanted to walk away, but it was like I was caught in a trance.
‘And would you know where his wife lived?’ I asked without even thinking.
He could barely mask his pleasure. ‘Please, my Majesty, I didn’t mean to upset you. I am sure it is only gossip, but if you wish to see her...’
I paused, trying to control my anger, but I couldn’t fight it. ‘Take me to her.’
He delivered his most perfect smile. ‘Yes my Majesty, we will leave immediately.’
Several chariots already awaited us in the courtyard, and my fury blinded me to the strangeness of this. Samuel climbed up and helped me in.
‘Go!’ he yelled at the guard.
I sped through the city with Samuel by my side, and I should have noticed the happier, healthier people, but my mind was consumed by only one image. We were headed for the river but veered left before reaching it.
As we approached a farmhouse, Samuel suddenly raised his hand, halting our convoy. ‘The house where she lives is up ahead, my Majesty. I thought perhaps an element of surprise would be beneficial.’
I nodded. ‘Go on foot,’ I instructed the soldiers—only our chariot continued.
When we reached the small mud building, I leaped down, storming inside. Everything was beautifully neat, and a delicious fragrance seeped from the fireplace. At any other time, I would have noticed how homely it was, but the sickening rage in my stomach drove me forward. I walked towards the back of the house—still no one. Confusion started to displace the anger…then I heard soft voices from a window. Six guards stopped short behind me, and Samuel appeared by my shoulder.
I edged towards the window not sure what I would see. A small courtyard came into view, and I noticed two figures standing at the side. As I looked closer, a sharp pain entered my shoulders and shot down my spine—it was Aydin, holding a woman. His arms were wrapped around her and he stared at something behind her.
‘My, she is as beautiful as they say.’
Samuel’s whispered words hit like a dagger. The anger surged again, ripping through my body. ‘No,’ I uttered.
Aydin’s head jerked sideways, and the color drained from his face. The woman glanced up, and they leaped apart. Aydin turned to face me, and she backed away with a look of terror; there was a wooden box behind her, and she leaned on it before bowing her head.
Aydin stepped forward his hands extended, pleading. The door to the courtyard was open, and my guards rushed through ironically ready for battle. I followed slowly, keeping the guards between us.
Aydin’s eyes locked on mine, his fear was palpable. ‘This is not what you think, please let me explain.’
I’d never seen Aydin so vulnerable, but before I could soften a voice hissed in my ear.
‘It is exactly what it looks like my Majesty. Don’t be fooled by his regret.’
It was Samuel again, so close I could feel the heat of his skin. My anger flamed with each word.
Aydin’s focus shifted to Samuel. ‘Whatever he’s told you, it’s all lies.’
‘Your eyes are the only things that do not lie,’ Samuel persisted.
Aydin lunged at Samuel. ‘Get away from her!’ he screamed, but his attack was thwarted by two guards. ‘So help me Samuel, one day you will regret ever meeting me. I promise you that.’
‘End this nonsense now my Majesty. This is clearly treason. Look at her, she does not even kneel before her Queen. She should be put to death for her disrespect alone.’
My eyes broke from Aydin sweeping towards the shaking woman. I examined her flawless skin, shimmering dark hair and perfect face, and my jealousy screamed even louder.
Aydin continued to struggle with the guards, begging me to listen, but I couldn’t take my eyes off his beautiful wife.
Why would he want to be with me when he could be with her? And why didn’t she kneel in my presence? She just c
lung to that box shaking. None of this seemed real anymore. My head filled with noise—Aydin’s yells, Samuel’s whispers, the guard’s grunts. I just wanted to be anywhere but here. I was so angry, so jealous, threatened by her in every way. She was the enemy, so easy to blame.
‘Kill her,’ Samuel hissed. ‘Kill her, my Majesty.’
It was all I could hear. The remaining guards braced, waiting for my command. I turned to meet their bewildered faces. In a barely audible voice, I commanded. ‘Kill her.’
‘No Callie, don’t!’ Aydin screamed. The guard struck his face for using my name.
I strode out leaving the chaos behind me. The noise intensified, and the woman cried out. I stepped through the front door, her pleas escalated until she yelled one last word.
‘Elijah!’
I froze—Elijah; the baby; the wooden box—it was his crib. What had I done? I shook my head violently. The scene I’d witnessed wasn’t a lover’s embrace, it was two parents admiring their child. Aydin’s wistful gaze had been for his son; the embrace had been comforting, not passionate. How could I have read it so wrong?
I spun around, but Samuel was directly behind. He sprung, propelling me backward with incredible strength.
‘Let me go. I have to stop them,’ I cried.
A guard emerged, halting in confusion.
Samuel tilted his head. ‘You cannot go back my Majesty. It would compromise your safety.’
I turned to the bewildered guard. ‘Go back immediately and tell them to stop.’
He rushed in. I heard her scream again, but it was cut off so quickly it could only mean one thing…I was too late. A wail broke from Aydin, and I physically felt his pain. The baby was crying, and I collapsed to my knees in horror.
Samuel towered above me with his eyes closed and lips curled into a cruel smile. In an instant, I was on my feet again. I slapped his face with everything in me. He didn’t even flinch; it was like hitting stone. ‘You lied to me.’
Guardian Page 6
