Earth Below, Sky Above

by John Scalzi

“It’s not going to happen,” Wilson said.

  “Then I think we’re going to have a problem here,” Goosen said.

  “You mean, now you’re going to try to beat the crap out of me?” Wilson said. “Shocked, I am. If you had just admitted this up front, we could be done by now.”

  “We’re not going to try anything,” said Mothudi.

  “Of course not,” Wilson said. He squeezed the bridge of his nose as if exasperated. “Gentlemen. I want you to notice that there are four of you and one of me. I also want you to notice that I am not the slightest bit concerned that a quartet of clearly experienced military muscleheads such as yourselves are planning to attempt to pummel me into dogmeat. Now, what does that mean? One, it could mean that I’m absolutely delusional. Two, it could mean that you really haven’t the slightest idea what you’re getting into. Which is it? You get to choose.”

  The four soldiers looked at one another and grinned. “We’re going to go with absolutely delusional,” Kruger said.

  “Fine,” Wilson said. He walked into the wide public corridor directly in front of the bar. The four soldiers watched him walk away, confused. Wilson turned to look at them. “Well, don’t just stand there like morons,” he said. “Get out here.”

  The four of them walked out to him, hesitant. Wilson waved them closer. “Come on, guys,” he said. “Don’t act like you didn’t want this. Gather round.”

  “What are we doing?” Goosen asked, uncertain.

  “You guys want a crack at me,” Wilson said. “Okay, so, here’s the deal. Spread yourselves out any way you like. Then one of you tries to hit me. If you can hit me without me blocking you, you get to hit me again. But if I block you, then it’s my turn. I have to hit all four of you without any of you blocking me. If any of you block me, it’s your turn again. Got it?”

  “Why are we doing it this way?” Mothudi asked.

  “Because this way it looks like we’re having harmless high jinks rather than the four of you attempting to start a war between Earth and the Colonial Union by randomly assaulting a CDF soldier,” Wilson said. “I think that’s wise, don’t you? So, go ahead now, position yourselves.”

  The four soldiers spread out in a semicircle in front of Wilson.

  “Anytime,” Wilson said.

  “Harry Wilson?” said a female voice.

  Wilson turned to look. Kruger rushed him, arms raised. Wilson blocked Kruger and put him on his back. Kruger exhaled in surprise.

  “Attacking while I was distracted,” Wilson said. “Nice. Futile, but nice.” He hauled Kruger back up and pushed him back into his old position. Then he returned his attention to the woman who addressed him.

  “Danielle Lowen,” he said. “What a pleasant surprise.”

  “All right, I give up,” Lowen said. She was standing with a man wearing a uniform. “What exactly are you doing?”

  “I’m embarrassing these four knuckledraggers,” Wilson said.

  “Do you need any help?” the man next to Lowen asked.

  “No, I’m good,” Wilson said, and Mothudi took a lunge at him. Mothudi was on the deck shortly thereafter. “You went out of turn,” Wilson said, mildly, to him. He got off Mothudi’s neck and let him crawl back into position. Then he looked back to Lowen. “Where are you two off to?” he asked.

  “Actually, we were looking for you,” Lowen said, and nodded to the man standing with her. “This is Captain David Hirsch, United States Air Force. Also, my cousin.”

  “You’re the one taking the high dive with me,” Wilson said.

  “That’s right,” Hirsch said.

  “Nice to meet you,” Wilson said.

  “Hey,” Kruger said. “Are we fighting here or what?”

  “Sorry,” Wilson said to him, and turned back to Hirsch and Lowen. “Excuse me for a minute.”

  “Take your time,” Hirsch said.

  “Will take no time at all,” Wilson said. He faced the four soldiers again. “Three rounds,” he said.

  “What?” said Kruger.

  “Three rounds,” Wilson repeated. “As in, I hit all of you three times each and we’re done. I’ve got people to see, and you probably need to practice breathing through your mouths or something. So, three rounds. Okay?”

  “Whatever,” Kruger said.

  “Good,” Wilson said, and smacked each of them across the face, hard, before they knew what hit them. They stood, holding their cheeks, stunned.

  “That’s one,” Wilson said. “Here comes round two.”

  “Wai—,” Kruger began, and the end of the word was lost in multiple smacking sounds.

  “Okay, that’s two,” Wilson said. “Ready for three?”

  “Fuck this,” Goosen said, and all four men rushed Wilson simultaneously.

  “Aaaaand that’s three,” Wilson said, to the four, who were all on the deck, clutching their necks and gasping. “Don’t worry, guys, your tracheas are just bruised. You’ll be fine in a day. Well, two days. Don’t rush it. So, we’re done here?…Guys?”

  Kruger vomited onto the deck.

  “I’m going to take that as a ‘yes,’” Wilson said. He reached down and patted the back of Kruger’s head. “Thanks for the workout, kids. It’s been fun. Don’t worry, I’ll see myself out.” He stood back up and walked over to Lowen and Hirsch.

  “That was impressive,” Hirsch said.

  “What’s really going to disturb you is that I am the Colonial Defense Forces version of totally out of shape,” Wilson said. “I’ve spent the last several years as a lab nerd.”

  “It’s true,” Lowen said. “He barely moved at all the last time I saw him.”

  “I did drink you under the table,” Wilson reminded her.

  “And ignored the pass I was making at you,” Lowen said.

  “I’m not that kind of boy,” Wilson said.

  “I’m not sure I want to be around for this conversation,” Hirsch said.

  “It’s just banter,” Wilson assured him.

  “Coward,” Lowen said, smiling.

  “Speaking of which, my friend Hart is back in the bar, holding a beer for me,” Wilson said. “Care to join us?” He jerked a thumb back at the four soldiers, still prone on the deck. “I tried to buy them beers, but they refused. Now look at them.”

  “I think we’ll join you,” Hirsch said. “If only out of self-defense.”

  “Wise,” Wilson said. “Very wise.”

  IV.

  “You wanted to see me,” Abumwe said to Coloma.

  “Yes,” Coloma said. “I’m sorry to take you away from your commitments.”

  “You didn’t,” Abumwe said. “I had scheduled an hour to eat and relax. This is it. And after forty minutes of a delegate from Kenya explaining to me how that country should be given Earth Station, on account of the space elevator having its base in Nairobi, anything you have to say to me will be a stream of clear rationality by comparison.”

  “I’ve been drafted,” Coloma said.

  “I withdraw my previous assertion,” Abumwe said. “What do you mean, drafted?”

  Coloma showed Abumwe her PDA, open to the order from the CDF. “The Colonial Defense Forces, with permission from the Department of State, has at least temporarily classified the Clarke as a CDF ship, and has at least temporarily drafted me into the service. Same rank, and I share a joint designation as captain with the Colonial Union’s civilian service, so none of my crew has to be drafted to follow my orders. I’ve also been ordered to keep this drafting, and the new designation for the Clarke, in strict secrecy.”

  “You’re telling me,” Abumwe observed.

  “No, I’m not,” Coloma said.

  “Understood,” Abumwe said.

  “Whatever this is involves you and your people,” Coloma said. “Orders or not, you need to know.”

  “Why do you think the CDF has done this?” Abumwe asked.

  “Because I think they expect something,” Coloma said. “We sacrificed the Clarke at Danavar—the former Clarke—
when someone set a trap for the Utche. We don’t know who. This ship was used by the CDF to try to ferret out a spy in their own ranks, unsuccessfully. When the Earth delegation came onto the ship, one of their own murdered another of their own, and tried to frame us for it, for reasons that have never been made clear to us. And then there was the Urse Damay, which fired on us when we were meeting with the Conclave, and controlled by forces unknown.”

  “We’re not to blame for any of those,” Abumwe said. “Those weren’t about us in particular.”

  “No, of course not,” Coloma agreed. “We’ve been in the wrong place at the wrong time. But in each case some outside, unknown group has been manipulating events for their own purpose. The same group? Separate groups? If separate, working together or apart? And to what end? And now we’re here, meeting with representatives from Earth. We know there’s still a spy within the CDF. We know that on Earth, someone is also pulling strings.”

  “And if either is going to make a statement or an action, this would be the time and the place,” Abumwe concluded.

  Coloma nodded. “Even more so because the Colonial Defense Forces have no ships at Earth Station and no personnel, other than Lieutenant Wilson.”

  “And now you,” Abumwe said.

  “Right,” Coloma said. “My primary orders are to pay close attention to any incoming ships. They’ve given me a schedule of every ship, from the Colonial Union or elsewhere, that is expected at Earth Station in the next ninety-six hours. They’ve also given me access to Earth Station’s flight control systems, so I can track ship communications. If anything looks suspicious, I’m to alert Earth Station and ping a drone they’ve placed at skip distance, which will immediately skip back to Phoenix Station.”

  “There’s the possibility that the threat might come from Earth, not outside of it,” Abumwe said. “The beanstalk to Earth Station has been bombed before. There are riots happening on Earth right now because of this summit and the CDF. Any of that could be cover for an event.”

  “It’s possible, but I don’t think that’s the CDF’s main concern. I think whoever it is that’s modeling this over there thinks an attack from a ship is the likely play,” Coloma said.

  “What makes you sure?” Abumwe asked.

  “Because the CDF gave me something else besides orders,” Coloma said.

  “So what the hell is the Colonial Union really up to?” Lowen asked Wilson. They, Schmidt and Hirsch were on their third round together at the bar.

  Wilson smiled and leaned back in his chair. “This is the place where I’m supposed to feign surprise and exclaim that the Colonial Union is acting only from the best and purest motives, right?”

  “Smart-ass,” Lowen said.

  Wilson raised his glass to her. “You know me so well,” he said.

  “It’s a serious question, though,” Lowen said.

  “I know,” Wilson said. “And my serious answer is that you know as much about it as I do.” He motioned to Schmidt. “As either of us does.”

  “We got our new directives about an hour before we set foot on Earth Station,” Schmidt said. “We were taken as much by surprise on this as you folks were.”

  “Why would you do it that way?” Hirsch asked. “I’m not a diplomat, so I might be missing out on some deep-level chess moves, but it seems like you guys are flying by the seat of your pants, here.”

  “That’s what it’s supposed to look like,” Lowen said. “Spring the idea of leasing the station here on the delegations from Earth to disrupt their plans to act in concert addressing legitimate grievances they have with the Colonial Union. Spring it on the actual diplomats from the Colonial Union so they don’t have any real authority to do anything other than listen to the Earth delegations grovel for a shot at the station lease. Change the conversation and change the direction of how Earth sees the Colonial Union. No, David, it’s supposed to look like confusion. But I’d bet you long odds that the Colonial Union’s been planning this little strategy for a long time. And for right now it’s working exactly how they wanted it to.” She drank from her beer.

  “Sorry,” Wilson said.

  “I don’t blame you,” Lowen said. “You’re just a tool like all the rest of us are. Although you seem to be having more fun than most at this point.”

  “He’s been drinking beer and beating up people,” Schmidt said. “What’s not to like?”

  “This from a man who hid at the bar while I was taking on four guys at once,” Wilson said.

  “You told me to go,” Schmidt said. “I was just following orders.”

  “And anyway, Captain Hirsch here and I will be doing some very important business tomorrow,” Wilson said.

  “That’s right,” Hirsch agreed. “Come fourteen hundred hours, Lieutenant Wilson and I will jump out of a perfectly good space station.”

  “It’s the first step that gets you,” Wilson said.

  “I’m not worried about the stepping,” Hirsch said. “I’m mildly concerned about the landing.”

  “Well, leave that to me,” Wilson said.

  “I have to leave it to you,” Hirsch pointed out. “You’re the one with the computer in your head.”

  “What does that mean?” Lowen said.

  “The suits we’ll be inside of are controlled by a BrainPal,” Wilson said, tapping his temple. “Unfortunately your cousin lacks one, and doesn’t seem likely to get one between now and the jump. So I’ll be controlling the deployment of both suits.”

  Lowen looked at her cousin and then back at Wilson. “Is that safe?” she asked.

  “We’re dropping to the Earth from the darkness of space,” Wilson said. “What about this is safe?”

  Hirsch cleared his throat, loudly and obviously.

  “What I meant to say is, of course it’s safe,” Wilson said. “Couldn’t be safer. Safer than going to the bathroom. Lots of people die pooping, you know. Happens every day.”

  Lowen narrowed her eyes at Wilson. “I’m not supposed to say this, but David is my favorite cousin,” she said.

  “I’m telling Rachel,” Hirsch said.

  “Your sister owes me money,” Lowen said. “Now shut up. I’m threatening Harry, here.” Hirsch grinned and shut up. “As I was saying, David’s my favorite cousin. If something happens to him, I’m going to have to come for you, Harry. And I won’t be as easy on you as those four soldiers were. I will, and this is a promise, kick your ass.”

  “Have you ever kicked anyone’s ass?” Hirsch asked. “Ever? You were always kind of a girly-girl.”

  Lowen slugged Hirsch in the arm. “I’ve been saving my kick-assery up for a special occasion,” she said. “This could be it. You should feel honored.”

  “Oh, I do feel honored,” Hirsch said.

  “If you’re so honored, you can get the next round,” Lowen said.

  “I’m not sure I’m that honored,” Hirsch said.

  Lowen looked shocked. “I threaten a Colonial Defense Forces soldier for you, and you won’t even get me a beer? That’s it, you no longer have official favorite cousin status. Rachel is back on top.”

  “I thought she owed you money,” Hirsch said.

  “Yes, but you owe me a beer,” Lowen said.

  “Family,” Hirsch said, to Wilson and Schmidt, and then got up. “Anything for you two?”

  “I’ll get Harry’s,” Schmidt said, getting up. “Come on, David. Walk you to the bar.” The two of them made their way through the crowd toward the beer taps.

  “He seems like a good guy,” Wilson said, to Lowen.

  “He is,” Lowen said. “And I’m serious, Harry. Don’t let anything happen to him.”

  Wilson held up his hand, as if pledging. “I swear I will not let anything happen to your cousin. Or at the very least, if anything happens to him, it will happen to me, too,” he said.

  “That last part doesn’t inspire me with confidence,” Lowen said.

  “It will be fine, I promise,” Wilson said. “The last time I did this, peopl
e were shooting at me on my way down. I missed having a leg blown off by millimeters. This will be a cakewalk compared to that.”

  “I still don’t like it,” Lowen said.

  “I sympathize entirely,” Wilson said. “This wasn’t exactly my idea, you know. But, look. David and I will have to get together tomorrow before the jump anyway in order to go over dive protocols and to walk him through what we’ll be doing. In your ample spare time, why don’t you tag along with him? I’ll give the impression I know what I’m talking about, I swear.”

  Lowen pulled out her PDA and scrolled through her schedule. “Can you do it at eleven?” she asked. “I have a fifteen-minute hole in my schedule then. I was going to use it to pee, but I can do this instead.”

  “I’m not responsible for your bladder,” Wilson said.

  “I’ll keep that in mind,” Lowen said. She put her PDA away. “At least I have time to pee. There are some people I know who have so many meetings now that they’re positively at risk for peritonitis.”

  “Busy schedules,” Wilson said.

  “Yes, well,” Lowen said. “This is what happens when one party drops a bomb onto everyone’s schedule and turns what was going to be an orderly summit into a goddamned mess, Harry.”

  “Sorry,” Wilson said again.

  “This goes back to that arrogance thing,” Lowen said. “You remember. You and I talked about this before. The Colonial Union’s biggest problem is its arrogance. This is a perfect example. Rather than sit down with the nations of the Earth to discuss the ramifications of keeping us bottled up for centuries, it’s attempting a sleight-of-hand maneuver, distracting us with this station lease.”

  “I remember also saying to you that if you wanted someone to defend the Colonial Union’s practices, you came to the wrong shop,” Wilson said. “Although I’ll note, strictly as a matter of observation, that the Colonial Union’s plan seems to be working perfectly.”

  “It’s working now,” Lowen said. “I’m willing to concede it’s a reasonable short-term solution. But as a long-term solution it has problems.”

  “Such as,” Wilson said.

  “Such as what is the Colonial Union going to do when the United States, China and Europe all say that as a matter of restitution, the Colonial Union should give us Earth Station?” Lowen said. “Forget all this leasing crap. The cost of one space station is a substantial discount on the profits accrued from two centuries of essentially free labor and security for the Colonial Union. You’d be getting off cheap.”