The Time in Between

by Kristen Ashley

  “Your family,” Coert remarked.

  “My family,” she stated firmly.

  “Caylen?” he asked.

  She looked confused but said, “If that’s what comes of this, then I want you to be open to that even though I know he’s going to have to prove to you he deserves to be in our lives.”

  “That’s not what I mean. When you said you’ll have your family, I was asking if you meant Caylen.”

  “No, I meant my family.”

  “Your family,” he stressed.

  She was no less confused. “Coert—”

  “Pat, Kath, Mike, Pam, Daly, Shannon and the kids?” he pushed.

  “Of course,” she stated like he’d temporarily lost rationality.

  “Pat told me you called them the family or Patrick’s family,” he shared.

  Her head jerked.

  “But they’re yours,” he told her.

  “Yes,” she whispered, like that just dawned on her.

  Christ.

  “You held yourself apart, didn’t you, because your parents and Caylen made you think you didn’t deserve that,” he guessed.

  “I . . . I don’t know,” she replied quietly.

  She might not know.

  But Coert did.

  “You did. And now you know. You know who they really are.”

  She nodded. “Pat went to you. He . . . he probably wasn’t sure about you but he knew I was giving up and so he went to you. Like a brother would do for—”

  Coert cut her off.

  “I don’t give a shit what made you believe. I’m just glad you get it now. And the only thing I disagree with you saying is you now have a chance to show Caylen the woman you really are. That’s not what’s happening. You’ve never been anything but you. The woman I fell in love with so deeply, I never let her go. The woman who earned her place in a family who’s devoted to her. So this is happening but what’s happening with it is not you doing dick to prove shit to your brother. You’re just gonna be you. And if he wakes up to the woman you’ve always been and you want him in your life, I’ll find a way to deal. But you’re not jumping through hoops for the man who shares your blood. You got three brothers. It’s up to him to prove he deserves to take his place and add to that number.”

  “His son is ill,” she reminded him gently.

  “And I’m a father, I feel that. But in this particular scenario, Cady, first and foremost I’m your man, so that factors, definitely. I’m still watching.”

  She slid her hand from his neck to his face and ran her thumb along his cheekbone and he saw in her eyes exactly how much she liked that, and it was a lot, but she didn’t say anything.

  “‘Fast Car,’” he whispered.

  Her eyes cut from her thumb to his but remained silent.

  Coert did not.

  “You never felt you belonged. They made you feel you were lacking. If anything good happened to you, you were always so surprised and acted like it was a miracle it dropped into your lap instead of being what it was, something you deserved because you’re all that’s you. So, baby, I hope you’re learning that there was always so much to you, you never had to work so hard to be someone, prove you belonged, to have all the things you got along the way. There was always so much to you, it was up to everyone around you to prove we were worthy of belonging to you.”

  Her lips trembled, wet instantly filled her eyes, spilling over, but Coert wasn’t done.

  “You ran out to that man in your nightie, cardigan with socks on your feet. From near on the moment I met you, my life became a lifetime endeavor to prove I was worthy to be yours.”

  “Stop it,” she whimpered.

  Coert didn’t stop it.

  “Patrick Moreland knew that before I even did.”

  More wet came and Cady’s entire body started trembling in his arms so much, Midnight sensed it, got up and started nosing her mom.

  “Stop it, Coert,” she whispered.

  “I’m glad he caught it.”

  Her hand slid back down as the other one came up to grab tight hold on his neck.

  “Stop,” she begged.

  “And I wish the man was alive so I could thank him for taking care of you after I fell down on that job.”

  He knew she wouldn’t like it.

  But Coert had to say it. He had to give it to her. He vowed it was the last time he’d bring it up, but he could do that because it was the last thing he had to do to put a line under the time in between.

  And he had no regrets even as she melted into him, moving a hand so she could burrow her face in his neck and let loose her tears.

  Midnight pushed into her as Coert turned his head so his lips were at her hair.

  “Be forever grateful to him for taking care of my Cady,” he murmured.

  Her body bucked.

  Coert absorbed it.

  And he absorbed her tears, stroking her back, alternately giving Midnight some love so she’d calm down and settle back on the floor.

  When it left her, Coert gave her more time before he turned her in his arms so they were both again facing the sea.

  She allowed it but stopped when she was where she wanted to be by digging her forehead in his neck.

  It took some time and her voice was so quiet, he almost didn’t hear her.

  But he heard her.

  “I know how much you love me and I love you the same so I want you to have more green. But when we make him, would you please give me a boy with your hazel? Because I love looking in Janie’s eyes but from the minute I looked into yours and fell in love with you, I wanted as much of that hazel as God would give me, so will you make that happen for me?”

  Coert could talk to God about that but in the end it would all be up to the Big Man.

  Still, he said, “I’ll do what I can.”

  She took hold of his hand, pulling it from around her, bringing it to her mouth where she gave his knuckles a kiss.

  She replaced it and only then did she say, “Thanks, honey.”

  To that, Coert stated the obvious.

  “It’s gonna be my pleasure, Cady.”

  She snuggled closer.

  Coert held her.

  And the beam of the lighthouse that was the last thing Patrick Moreland gave to the daughter he met at a convenience store went round and round, constant and tireless in offering safety.

  She was asleep in her bed with Midnight when Coert left her, got dressed and went over.

  It still wasn’t late, but it was too late to knock on a man’s door.

  He did it anyway, not hammering like only a cop knew how to get the door opened.

  But he did it in a way it wouldn’t be ignored.

  Elijah didn’t ignore it but he was barefoot, in sweats with a thermal he was still pulling on when he opened it.

  “Shit, Cady okay?” he asked the minute he saw Coert at the door.

  And so he’d be buying the man a peephole because for Christ’s sake, no one should open a door not knowing who was on the other side. Even a man the size of Elijah with his door being inside a garage.

  “Want you to know Cady got bad news today. Her nephew has leukemia.”

  When Elijah’s eyes went from alert to alarmed, Coert quickly assured him, of a sort.

  “Not any of the boys you know. Her biological brother’s son. You might have noticed the lights on in the studio, her brother is staying there. We’re all leaving tomorrow to go to Denver so she can get tested to see if her bone marrow is a match, and if it is, there isn’t a delay in doing the transplant.”

  “Shit, shit, shit,” Elijah cursed, leaning forward to look toward the lighthouse like he could do that and make sure Cady was okay.

  “While we’re gone, my ex and daughter are gonna look after Midnight, my buds Jake, Mickey and Junior are gonna keep an eye on the lighthouse, and you’re goin’ down to New Haven.”

  Elijah reared back and stared at him.

  “Life is too short, brother,” Coert whispered. “Don’
t waste a second.”

  Elijah started shaking his head. “Coert, man, I—”

  “Don’t waste a second.”

  Elijah shut his mouth.

  Coert stared him in the eyes.

  Elijah opened his mouth.

  “What if I can’t give her—?”

  “All she wants is you.”

  Elijah shook his head. “She’s too young to know what she wants.”

  “Then suffer the heartbreak of losing her if that happens. But trust me on this, the pain of wondering what could have been is a fuckuva lot worse than the pain of losing something that isn’t working. And the thing about that is, at this juncture, you still got the chance to find out all it can be. If you don’t go for it, you’ll never know. You think you’re not worthy so you’re settling for something you’ve decided you’re worthy of. So I gotta ask you to trust me on something else. You’re worthy because I know the man you are and that’s just the plain truth. But you won’t believe that so you gotta learn to believe this. You’re worthy simply because she thinks you are. So believe in what she sees and get your ass to New Haven.”

  “I’d never forgive myself if something happened with Verry and I lost her just because of that. But also because, at the same time, I’d be losin’ Cady.”

  “You’re never gonna lose Cady and if you don’t know that by now, she’ll just have to show you. But take it from me, I know. You’re in her heart, Elijah, and once you find a place there, she never lets go.”

  “Verry reminds me of her,” Elijah said quietly.

  “Then get your ass to New Haven, man.”

  They stared at each other again.

  Then Elijah looked beyond Coert to his truck.

  And Coert knew his decision was made.

  “The sheriff in me has got to ask you to get a decent night’s sleep,” Coert shared.

  Elijah returned his attention to Coert. “You think I’ll sleep?”

  Coert grinned. “Right, then if you don’t have a huge-ass travel mug, Cady does so we’ll set you up with some coffee.”

  “I got a mug.”

  He said that but didn’t move.

  Coert lifted a brow. “You want me to help you pack?”

  That was when Elijah grinned.

  “Naw, bud, I’m good.”

  Coert nodded and started to move away.

  “You’ll keep in touch . . . about Cady and her nephew?” Elijah asked.

  Coert looked back. “Definitely.”

  Coert was nearly to the door when he heard Elijah call his name.

  He turned back again to see Elijah standing in the garage holding open the door to his place.

  “Do you believe in what she sees?” Elijah asked.

  From the minute I looked into yours and fell in love with you, I wanted as much of that hazel as God would give me.

  “Absolutely,” he answered.

  Elijah dropped his chin and lifted his hand.

  Then he disappeared behind his door.

  And Coert returned to Cady.

  Drink to That

  Coert

  Present day . . .

  HE DIDN’T WANT TO DO it. He really didn’t.

  But standing in the waiting room seeing Caylen at the window while Kath, Pam and Shannon performed an emergency adoption of Alice, Caylen’s ex-wife, and Pat, Mike and Daly put herculean effort into not incinerating Caylen with their eyes (and not surprisingly it was Mike who was failing at this), Coert had to do it.

  So he moved from the man huddle to Caylen at the window.

  It was at the last second that Caylen started and turned to Coert, telling Coert his mind was planted firm elsewhere.

  Also not a surprise.

  Cady’s part in the test for a match wouldn’t take very long, and if Caylen wasn’t involved, the entire adult Moreland clan probably would have just waited for Coert to bring her home.

  It turned out good they’d come, however, because Alice was making clear she wanted to be involved in everything, including Caylen’s estranged sister being tested. And since Caylen and Alice did not have a good relationship, the unique “You don’t know us, but bad shit is going down, so we’re not going to smother you and we’re here if you need us” approach of the Moreland women was turning out to be a good thing.

  So Alice had them keeping an eye on her and keeping her distracted, as well as her mother, who had come with her.

  Cady also had them at her back when she’d met a gracious and exceptionally grateful Alice in that same waiting room twenty minutes before.

  It was Caylen who was the odd man out in this and Coert didn’t know him, didn’t want to know him, and what the man could want was to be an island.

  However Cady would want Coert to make sure that’s where he wanted to be.

  “You hanging in there?” he asked low.

  Caylen slid a glance toward Cady’s brothers before he looked at Coert. “I honestly don’t mean to be difficult but is it really necessary for all of them to be here? The test is non-invasive and takes ten minutes to perform.”

  “Is them being here upsetting you or Alice?” Coert asked.

  He didn’t answer. He looked to the window.

  Coert already knew it wasn’t upsetting Alice, and if it had, they would have taken off.

  But it was getting under Caylen’s skin.

  There were a lot of things Coert could say, not many of them nice, so he took a second to make sure he had it in check before he said, “Patrick Moreland didn’t marry her to make her his wife. He married your sister to adopt her.”

  Caylen’s eyes came right back to him.

  Coert kept going.

  “This is a bad time for you and I hope you understand that I get that. But years ago, Cady was in a really bad place and her family turned their backs on her. Patrick gave her a new family and those men and women consider her their sister. It’s healthy. It’s right. They’re loyal to her. They love her. You’re not unaware of how things have always been between you and Cady so I hope with that you get that they’re understandably protective. So they’re here. But if they’re making you uncomfortable, I’ll ask them to go order us some coffees and Cady and I’ll meet them after she’s done.”

  “Adopt her?” he asked.

  “Patrick and Cady’s relationship was entirely platonic. He offered to adopt her at first but she refused.”

  “She was an adult,” Caylen scoffed.

  “She was alone, terrified and heartbroken. She’d lost everything. Including her family,” Coert returned.

  Caylen looked back out the window and Coert watched his jaw get tight.

  He sighed.

  Caylen spoke.

  “Now I get it. Thought it was weird, they showed here. If it was me, I’d hate her. Girl that age marrying my father.”

  Coert turned his own eyes out the window and crossed his arms on his chest.

  He felt Caylen’s regard but didn’t look at him when Caylen asked, “Did you know that . . . the adoption thing?”

  “No.”

  “Is that why you dumped her?”

  “That was my excuse. But no.” He looked at Cady’s brother. “I let her go because I’d put her in harm’s way, I’d lied to her and I thought she would be better off without me.”

  “But she stayed married to him.”

  “She stayed married to him because he got cancer and beat it back for twelve years with Cady’s help, and she couldn’t be involved in that as a family member unless she was legally tied to him.”

  Caylen’s jaw got tight again as he looked back out the window.

  “Maybe we shouldn’t talk,” Coert suggested, losing his hold on keeping it in check.

  Caylen’s attention came back to Coert and he looked genuinely confused.

  “Why?” he asked.

  “Not bein’ harsh but you’re still being judgmental about Cady when—”

  “I’m not being judgmental about Cady. I’m being judgmental about them,” he jerked his head
to indicate Cady’s family, “and you.”

  Coert’s body locked.

  Caylen went on.

  “If they had some score to settle with my sister and were doing it by pretending to care about her, set her up for a fall, I don’t want them here.”

  Astonished, Coert stared at Caylen Webster.

  Caylen stared back but he did it talking.

  “And I’ve got a lot on my mind and part of it is that I’m not sure how I feel about you. You think I’m an ass for turning my back on my sister but you did the same thing. Now you think you’ve got the high ground because you two somehow found your way back to each other but you’re no different than me. You’re being protective of her because you think I’m going to treat her like trash. But I’m in the position of having no ground to stand on because I’m concerned about the same coming from you and I can’t do anything about it.”

  “That’s the first time I’ve ever seen you behave like an actual brother,” Coert remarked.

  “That’s because another part of what’s weighing on my mind is driving the entire time from my place to her thinking that Cady would close the door in my face when I came to ask her for help about something that’s life and death for my son.”

  He was losing it, his voice breaking on the last three words.

  He took a second to gather himself, Coert gave him that, and then he continued.

  “And instead she did the exact opposite, so I’m dealing with my son being ill and it hitting me in the face how I destroyed my family, all of it, including my relationship with Cady.”

  “There’s only one thing I can put at ease in your mind and that’s to tell you I love your sister. Truth, I’m not bein’ a dick when I say it’s not yours to have how we got back what we lost. But I’m making her happy and that’s really all you need to know. The rest, straight up, is up to you.”