An Amish Schoolroom

by Amy Clipston

  She smiled over at Glen. “Dat, there’s someone here who would like to speak with you. I’m going to put Glen on the phone.” She handed the receiver to Glen.

  Glen took a deep breath and then held the phone between them so she could hear too. “Hi, Gideon. This is Glen.”

  “How are you?” Dat’s tone was friendly.

  “Fine. Danki.” Glen cleared his throat. “I wanted to talk to you about Laurel. She and I have been getting to know each other, and we care about each other. I would like your permission to date her.” He looked over at her. “She’s become important to me, and I promise you I will be respectful. Also, I live with my parents, and they can be our chaperones. But I need your permission before we can officially date.”

  “Oh.” Dat sounded surprised. “How does Laurel feel about this?”

  “I would like to date him, Dat,” she said. “I’m listening in too.” Her heart began to beat wildly as she waited for his response.

  Dat hesitated for a moment. “Well, I’m not sure what to say. I’m a little surprised by this. Dating makes your stay in Colorado a bit permanent, and that’s not what your mamm and I envisioned when we gave you permission to apply for the job.”

  Laurel’s heart sank. “I understand. I wasn’t expecting this either, but I truly care for Glen.”

  “Does that mean you see a future with him?” Dat asked.

  She glanced over at Glen, and her heart gave a resounding Yes! Then her body began to vibrate with fear as she wondered if she could truly leave her family behind. The muscles in her shoulders tightened.

  Glen’s expression fell as he studied her.

  Oh no! She was hurting him too!

  “I’m—I’m not sure what the future holds yet, but I’d like to explore the idea,” she said, hoping not to worry her parents.

  Glen’s eyes twinkled, and she felt her shoulders relax.

  “Well, Glen,” Dat began, “Laurel’s mother and I had expected her to come home before she started dating, but she’s old enough.” He was quiet for a beat. “If you promise to be respectful, then I will permit it.”

  Glen released a breath. “Danki, Gideon. I won’t let you down.”

  “Danki, Dat,” Laurel said, relief flowing through her.

  “All right then,” Dat said. “I need to get back to the cows. You call again later in the week to talk to your mamm, Laurel.”

  “I will, Dat,” she said. “Give my love to everyone.” She hung up and then clapped her hands. “I’m so excited!”

  “Me too.” Glen pulled her against him for a hug, and she rested her cheek on his shoulder. “I’m so honored to be able to date you.”

  When he brushed his lips over her cheek, she closed her eyes, savoring the feeling.

  “Let’s go celebrate,” Glen said.

  He held out his hand, and she took it before they headed out of the shop and toward his parents’ house.

  “Are you sure it’s okay if I come for supper?” Laurel asked as they climbed the porch steps.

  “Ya, I told mei mamm I was going to invite you.”

  She followed Glen into the kitchen and greeted his parents before helping his mother serve the meal of hamburger casserole. Then she took a seat at the table across from Glen and bowed her head in silent prayer.

  After everyone’s prayers, Glen cleared his throat. “I have an announcement to make,” he said, scooping a mountain of casserole onto his plate. “Laurel and I are dating.”

  Laurel smiled as she looked over at Glen. She turned, and when Magdalena’s mouth twisted downward, Laurel’s heart sank.

  Moses looked surprised. “You are?”

  “Ya, we are. We called Laurel’s father, and he gave us permission.” Glen’s smile widened. “And I’m honored to call Laurel my girlfriend.”

  Laurel blinked as she took in his parents’ scowls. Her hands began to tremble, and she stared down at her plate.

  “That’s-that’s fantastic,” Moses said. “I’m froh for you.”

  Magdalena looked down at her plate. “Ya.”

  “Laurel?” Glen asked.

  “Ya?” Laurel pushed the ties to her prayer covering over her shoulders.

  Glen gave her a concerned expression. “You’re not eating. Are you okay?”

  “I’m fine.” She forced her lips into a smile, but it felt more like a grimace.

  Glen seemed to study her, but she cast her eyes down and nibbled her casserole while he and his father discussed work.

  After they were finished eating, she helped Magdalena clear the table and then wash the dishes. Laurel tried to pull Magdalena into a conversation about cooking, but Magdalena gave her short responses to any of her questions.

  Laurel was relieved when the kitchen was clean and she and Glen stepped out into the brisk night air. He held out his arm for her, and she wrapped her hand through it as they walked together to her little house.

  “You hardly said a word at supper,” he said, the cold ground crunching beneath their feet. “Are you naerfich? Worried?”

  “Your parents don’t like me,” she mumbled. The words nearly broke her heart.

  “That’s not true.”

  She spun to face him. “It was obvious your mamm was not froh with the news we’re dating, and your dat seemed more stunned than pleased. How can this possibly work if your family doesn’t approve of me?”

  “Laurel, I care for you more than I’ve ever cared for anyone. If you care for me, then this can work.”

  Her lip trembled. “So, I’m right. They don’t like me.”

  “They do like you. Just give them time to get used to the idea that we’re dating, okay?” He moved his finger over her cheek with a featherlike touch, and she inclined her face toward him.

  Cupping his hand to her cheek, he leaned down and gently kissed her. An unfamiliar quiver of wanting danced up her spine, and she closed her eyes and enjoyed the feel of his lips against hers. Laurel was certain she was dreaming, but the heat rushing through her veins was as real as the feel of his lips.

  No, she wasn’t dreaming. This moment was as real as any other. And as Glen’s lips left hers and his eyes shimmered at her in the darkness, she was certain that everything would somehow be okay.

  Chapter 8

  Laurel walked up the Troyers’ back porch steps Saturday afternoon. She had spent the morning cleaning, writing to her family, and preparing for the next week of school. Now, she needed a break—and to spend some well-earned time with her boyfriend.

  Her heart lifted at the thought. It had been five days since Glen had asked permission to date her, and she hadn’t stopped smiling since. Her lips burned at the memory of their first kiss! She had joined Glen and his family for supper every night before they sat and talked on her porch. She was so happy. In fact, she couldn’t recall a time when she’d been so happy.

  She felt as if the Lord had led her to Colorado to meet Glen and fall in love. And that notion sent bliss curling through her.

  But she still couldn’t shake the feeling that his family wasn’t pleased with their new relationship. If only she could figure out why they didn’t approve. Her gut told her they preferred he date a member of their community, but what did that matter if she was a baptized member of the Amish church?

  When she climbed the back steps, she glanced up at the gray clouds in the sky and breathed in the scent of rain. She shivered and pulled her heavy coat closer to her body as a cool breeze moved over her.

  Squaring her shoulders, Laurel knocked on the back door. She heard footsteps and then the door opened, revealing Bethlyn.

  Laurel smiled. “Gut to see you, Bethlyn.”

  “Come in.” Bethlyn beckoned her to enter the house.

  Laurel followed her into the kitchen and greeted Magdalena, who looked over from the counter, where a large bowl, a cookbook, and ingredients sat.

  Laurel looked back and forth between Magdalena and Bethlyn as they watched her with uneasy expressions, sending more anxiety coursing through he
r. “I was looking for Glen. I knocked on the shop door, but no one answered. I thought maybe he was here.”

  “They went for supplies,” Bethlyn offered.

  Laurel forced a smile. “Oh. Will you tell him I stopped by?”

  “Of course,” Magdalena said. “We’ll see you later.” Then she turned back to the counter and looked down at her cookbook.

  Bethlyn nodded and then sidled up to her mother.

  Laurel opened her mouth, ready to ask if she could join them, but then she stilled. If they had wanted her to cook with them, they would have invited her. A coldness swept through her as the truth smacked her in the face: She wasn’t welcome in their kitchen.

  She heard little voices in the family room, and she peeked in to where the twins were coloring. They sat on the floor and leaned against a coffee table, their backs to the doorway. She lingered for a moment and considered saying hello, but the overwhelming urge to leave the Troyers’ home propelled her toward the doorway.

  When she reached the mudroom, she looked down and found her shoe untied. She rested her foot on the bench and began to tie her laces.

  “I’m not froh about any of this,” Magdalena grumbled in the kitchen. “I have this terrible feeling she is going to convince Glen to move to Pennsylvania with her, and I’ll lose mei sohn forever.”

  Laurel froze, her breath caught in her throat.

  “I understand,” Bethlyn said. “I keep praying he’ll break up with her and find someone in our community. I don’t want to lose mei bruder either.”

  “She’s made it clear that she’s homesick,” Magdalena continued. “She never should have come here if she knew in her heart that she didn’t want to leave her family. Why does she have to break up mine?”

  A black feeling settled in the pit of Laurel’s stomach. She gasped and choked on a sob as she finished tying her shoelace. Then she hurried out the back door, closing it gingerly behind her before she stepped out into the cold, misty rain.

  She looked up at the sky as the truth rained down on her with the raindrops—the Troyers didn’t approve of her. They only saw her as a threat to their family. She didn’t belong here. She needed to go back home.

  Laurel started toward her house and then stopped and looked over at the shop. She needed her family. No, she needed her mother.

  She rushed over to the shop and was relieved when she found the door unlocked. She stepped in and hurried to the office. Then she dialed her family’s number and prayed her parents would hear the phone ringing.

  Please, God. Please let them be home. Please let my family help me heal my broken heart.

  “Hello?” Her middle sister’s voice sounded through the line after several rings.

  “Maranda?” Laurel sniffed and wiped her face with a tissue from her pocket.

  “Laurel? Are you okay?”

  She couldn’t catch her breath with her grief packed around her heart. “No, not really. Is Mamm around?”

  “What happened?” Maranda sounded frantic. “Are you hurt?”

  “I just need to talk to Mamm.” She needed her mother so badly it felt like a hunger pang.

  “Hang on.”

  Laurel held her tears at bay and wiped her eyes and nose while she waited for her mother to come to the phone. After a few moments, her mother’s soothing voice rang through the line.

  “Laurel,” Mamm said. “Was iss letz?”

  “I don’t belong here.” Her hand fisted and she held onto the truth as she shared her concerns about Glen’s family. Then she repeated what she’d heard them say. “I never should have come here at all. I want to come home.”

  “Ach, mei liewe. I’m so sorry. I thought you were so froh there.”

  “I was, but I’ve realized I made a terrible mistake.”

  “Have you spoken to Glen about this?”

  “Not yet.”

  “Talk to Glen and then pray about it. Then if you’re still certain you want to come home, tell the school board.”

  “You and Dat won’t be disappointed in me if I come home?”

  “No, mei liewe. Your dat and I just want you to be froh.”

  “Danki.”

  “Go make yourself some tea and calm down. Call me later.”

  “Okay. Ich liebe dich, Mamm.”

  “I love you too,” her mother said.

  Feeling heavy and yet hollowed out, Laurel hung up the phone and then headed back out into the rain. As she walked toward her house, her heart broke a little more with every step.

  * * *

  Glen walked into the kitchen later that afternoon and breathed in the delicious scent of carrot cake.

  “Oh, it smells heavenly in here,” he told his mother and sister as they sat at the table together looking through a catalog.

  Mamm looked up at him. “Laurel stopped by earlier. She was looking for you.”

  “What did she want?” He moved to the refrigerator and poured himself a glass of water.

  “She didn’t say,” Bethlyn responded as she turned a page in the catalog. “She asked us to let you know she was here.”

  He drank the water and then set the glass in the sink. “I’ll go see her.”

  The cold rain soaked through his coat and dripped from his straw hat while Glen walked toward the daadihaus. He climbed the back steps and knocked on the door.

  After a few moments, the door opened, and Laurel stood before him, her eyes bloodshot and her cheeks bright pink as if she’d been crying.

  Panic scratched his throat. “Laurel! Was iss letz?”

  “It’s time for me to go home.” She turned and walked toward the kitchen.

  He followed her and reached for her arm. “What do you mean?”

  “I don’t belong here.” She stepped away from his touch and yanked a tissue out of the box on the counter. “I stopped by your parents’ haus earlier and asked where you were. Your mamm and schweschder were cold to me, and when they thought I had left, I heard them talking about me.” Through tears, she shared what his mother and sister had said.

  Glen’s mouth fell open as confusion and ire warred inside of him. “Are you sure they said that?”

  She gave a derisive snort. “Why would I make that up?”

  “I-I don’t know what to say.” He felt a stab of shame.

  She wiped her eyes and nose with the tissue and then stared down at the counter. “Coming here was a mistake. I’m going to tell the school board that I quit and then book a ride home.” Her face crumpled.

  “No, don’t say that.” He walked over to her, and she backed away from him. “Please, Laurel. Don’t leave. We can work this out.”

  “No, we can’t. It’s obvious your family doesn’t want me here, and if they feel that way, then certainly other members of your community do too.” Her voice was gravelly as her eyes shimmered with unshed tears.

  He shook his head as his throat dried. “No, that cannot be true. Faith and Jerome like you. And Rena does too. Everyone in the youth group likes you as well.” He pointed in the direction of his sister’s house. “And look at how much mei bruderskinner love you, and all the good you’re doing for the students.”

  Then he pointed to his chest. “And I love you, Laurel. I’ve known if for a while now, but I was afraid to tell you because I thought you might feel it was too soon for me to say it. Ich liebe dich. And if you left, it would break my heart.”

  “And that’s the problem. I’m a threat to your family. They don’t want me to steal you away. You need to give up on me and find someone in your community, just like Bethlyn said.” Her lower lip and chin quivered as she spoke.

  Oh, how he longed to take away her agony! He reached over to brush away her tears, but she moved away from him.

  “Please leave, Glen.” She looked pained.

  “You don’t mean that.”

  “Ya, I do.” She lifted her chin. “We can’t date or be together. I want to be left alone.”

  Her words were like a knife to his stomach. “I’m so sorry. I�
��I don’t know how to fix this.”

  “Go now.” She brushed past him and disappeared into the bathroom, her sobs sounding through the little house.

  He started toward the bathroom and then stopped. His heart shattered as he listened to her cry. He looked up toward the ceiling and opened his heart to God.

  Lord, help me! What am I supposed to do for the woman I love?

  Suddenly, his anguish transformed as white-hot anger boiled under his skin. His family needed to know how badly they had hurt Laurel.

  Glen wrenched open the door and stalked back toward his house, his body vibrating with his rage. He found his mother, sister, and grandmother sitting in the kitchen.

  Mamm looked up at him, and her expression flickered with worry. “Are you okay?”

  “No, as a matter of fact, I’m not.” He pointed toward the daadihaus. “I just spoke to Laurel, and she’s planning to quit and go home. Do you want to know why?”

  Mamm’s mouth opened and then closed, reminding him of a fish.

  He sat down across from them. “I’ll tell you why. She stopped by earlier looking for me, and when she went to leave, she heard you and Bethlyn talking about her.” Then he shared what she overheard.

  Mamm glanced over at Bethlyn, and his sister’s cheeks reddened as she looked down at the tabletop.

  Mammi gasped. “Did you say that about her?”

  Mamm gave a solemn nod.

  “She’s a sweet maedel, and she and Glen obviously care for each other. Why would you want to break them up when Laurel makes your sohn froh?” Mammi demanded. “Don’t you want your kinner to have a happy life?”

  Mamm also studied the tabletop.

  “Mammi is right,” Glen said as admiration for his grandmother swelled within him. “Laurel is a sweet, schmaert, and kind maedel, and I love her. Do you realize how much you hurt her and me? Now she wants to leave!” His voice rose as his body shook with renewed fury. “She’ll be leaving the schoolchildren behind, and you’ve ruined everything between her and me to boot!” His voice was flinty and sharp.

  “What’s going on in here?” Dat’s voice boomed.

  Glen turned and found Dat and Roy standing behind him.