HeartsandWishes

by Shiloh Walker

  Nik sneered. “Running away. You make it sound as though she is fleeing something ugly. Something unbearable.”

  “She is.” Chelly moved away from the table, walking slowly, feeling as though every muscle in her body had been worked over with a metal pipe. I’m not really doing this, am I?

  But she didn’t see that she had much of a choice.

  “She’s running away from the prison you created for her,” Chelly said softly. She grabbed her bag and slung it over her shoulder and then moved to stare out the windows over the sprawling vista. The town spread before them, looking in some ways like a European village, and in other ways like the most metropolitan of cities. “Will you force Rhys to bring her home?”

  “This is where she belongs.”

  Chelly nodded. It was nothing more than she’d expected. “You would have him bring her home, as if she is some sort of criminal.”

  He hesitated and for one brief second, she felt hope flare in her heart. “Chelly, she is too naïve. Too immature. She doesn’t know how the mortal world works. This is the only place she is safe.”

  “And yet even here, you feel the need to dictate her every move.”

  Tears stung her eyes when he moved up behind her and rested big, strong hands on her shoulders. “It will be fine, Chel. Perhaps…” He blew out a sigh. “Perhaps, now that Rhys has managed to contain the security threat, we could take her with us when we go to Rome.”

  In December, before the mess with the rebels and the equally complicated mess with Holly, they’d decided they’d spend Valentine’s Day in Rome. Chelly loved Rome. And under normal circumstances, she would have been overjoyed about Nik’s words—so what if he was talking about sharing what should have been a romantic little getaway with their daughter. That he would even consider letting Holly leave the Reach should have had Chelly ecstatic.

  But it was too little, too late. Way too late. “No.” She shook her head and slipped away from his hands, backing away from him, hardly able to see his face through her tears. “I can’t force Rhys to not find her and I do need to know she’s safe. But if Rhys had refused, you’d simply send another. More, you might even be obstinate enough to have a formal charge levied against Rhys for daring to disobey.” A tear fell free and she reached up, wiped it away. “If you insist on doing this, I will not be here when Holly is brought home.”

  It was disturbing how silent Nik suddenly went. It was as though he had stopped breathing, stopped moving. His lids didn’t flicker and his face was as still and smooth as a doll’s. A handsome, breath-stealing, sexy doll but still just a blank doll’s face. The temperature in the room dropped and she could see the wild magick fighting to spill free from him, turning the skin of his hands white and the air around him became so cold she could see ice crystals forming. He finally spoke, his voice a mere whisper. “What did you say, my wife?”

  Chelly swallowed. “I’ve got to be honest. A lot of this is my fault. I wanted to protect her. I wanted to coddle her and keep her close. Even when I saw that you were taking it too far, I said nothing. And now Holly is in trouble, could be in danger and I blame myself. If I had stepped up before this got so out of control, maybe—” then she broke off, laughing. “Who am I fooling? Nothing I did or said would ever have made you do anything less than what you want. But since I didn’t even try, I’m as guilty as you.”

  She closed her eyes. Then opened them and stared at Nik’s handsome face. “Not anymore, Nik. I won’t be party to you keeping her in this pretty little cage.”

  “You speak as though you intend to leave me, wife.”

  “I don’t intend to. I am.” She lifted her chin and faced him down as he approached. When he reached out to catch her chin, she held still and didn’t jerk away. She wanted to, though. His midnight blue eyes were swirling and glowing with his temper and the feel of his skin was so icy cold it hurt when he touched her. Even after all these years, Chelly wasn’t much for confrontations, even with her husband. Especially with him. But she couldn’t back down on this.

  “I love you, Nik. But I love Holly too. And I can’t watch you destroy her.”

  Turning around, she headed for the door. It started to slide open for her but one word from Nik had it sliding shut again. It closed with a rather decisive sounding snick and Chelly stopped in her tracks, stunned and then feeling damn stupid for being even just a little fazed. Spinning on her heel, she glared at Nik.

  “What makes you think I’d allow you to leave me?”

  Oh now that does it. Closing the distance between them, she hauled off and punched him. If she’d tried to hit him like that twenty-five years ago, or even ten, she probably would have broken her hand. But as Nik’s bonded mate, she was elf-mate, and the longer she spent with Nik, the more elvish traits she would take on. Not their magick and not some of the physical anomalies unique to the elves but the strength, the speed, the longevity would be hers.

  Which meant, when she hit Nik full force, she sent him stumbling. Chelly would have preferred to knock him on his arrogant ass but she settled for seeing a deep red mark bloom on his cheek. “You can’t keep me here, husband,” she said, her voice mockingly sugar-sweet. “I remember my vows to you quite well and I remember the meaning behind them. I came to you of my own free will, taking your name and the gifts that a mating with you bequeathed upon me. Should I ever renounce them, then I am to be returned to the mortal world, where I will lose those very same gifts.”

  “Which means in time you will be naught but a mortal woman, you will age. You will die.” Closing the distance between them once more, he grasped her shoulders and shook her. “You go nowhere.”

  Tossing her hair back, she glared back at him. “The hell I don’t. I won’t watch you destroy Holly, Nik. She’s a woman, she’s a wonderful woman—smart, funny, sweet and she has your pride. She deserves a life. She deserves some happiness. But you don’t want that for her. All you want for her is safety.” The word, so simple, so innocuous and well-meaning, left a bitter taste in her mouth.

  Taking a deep breath, she waited until she could finish speaking without screaming. “You’ve made it damn clear that you are the final authority on all things here, including your daughter’s welfare. Since I mean nothing, I won’t stay here.”

  She shoved him back and turned around, facing the door. “Open this door, Nik, or you will be very, very sorry.”

  He swore. Hesitated. Swore again. Then finally, he said, “Reengage auto scan.”

  There was a faint humming sound as Chelly’s molecular makeup was scanned. “I only do what is best for Holly, Chel,” Nik said, his voice hoarse.

  “No. You do what is best for your own peace of mind and comfort,” Chelly replied woodenly. She passed through the doors the second they opened and as she headed down the hall, she heard Nik call out behind her once more.

  “There are none who will dare take you away from here, Chel. They know I won’t allow it.”

  Glancing back at him, she smirked and said, “Oh now that is where you’re wrong. You might have the lion’s share of arrogance here but there are one or two others who dare to think for themselves.”

  Before leaving, she paused and turned back to him. A bitter smile curled her lips. “You know, Nik…thirty years ago, you were my dream come true. My greatest wish come to life. You’ve made me so damn happy. You know what my biggest wish is now?” Chelly didn’t bother waiting for an answer. “The only thing I want out of my life now is for my kids to be happy. That’s my wish. Bryan, he’s happy enough for now. But Holly isn’t happy. She’s miserable, Nik. And you, damn it, are the cause of it.

  * * * * *

  Rhys could feel Chelly coming from a mile away. He’d sought the solitude of the workshop, though it was torture being there. It didn’t really seem possible but he felt as though he could still catch a lingering trace of Holly’s sweet scent.

  After a month, it wasn’t possible but tell that to his memory.

  Calling on his iron control, he sank i
nto a deep trance and focused on Holly but there was only the faintest lingering trace of her magick. From when she’d teleported out, most likely. Sinking deep, deeper, he extended himself even further only to come flying back into his physical body with a resounding thunk as he grew aware of Chelly’s presence.

  Her very angry presence.

  Rhys was a master of his own magicks but he was riding on the edge with his emotions. Throw Chelly’s volatile state into the mix and his concentration was shot. He opened his eyes just as he heard the hard pounding on the door. Rising from the floor, he gave the verbal command for the doors and watched from the middle of the room as Chelly came storming in.

  Her eyes were bright with tears and he realized that she wasn’t just pissed, she was hurt. “You can find her, right?”

  He inclined his head. Under most circumstances, he wouldn’t have made the promise. But this wasn’t most circumstances. This was Holly. He would find her—he had to. “I’ll find her,” he said quietly.

  “And then you’ll bring her back here?” Chelly said but her voice was oddly rigid and she wouldn’t look at him.

  “I don’t know yet.”

  “Will you do it because Nik says so?”

  At that, Rhys laughed. “I’ve never done a damn thing simply because Nik says so. He’s a friend, true, though right now, he’s an arrogant ass and making me forget that we’ve been friends for decades. But he is a friend, even if…or maybe because I’m not as impressed with him as most of the population. I know him too well.”

  “That’s not really the answer I was looking for,” Chelly whispered.

  Gently, Rhys said, “I know. But I can’t give you that answer yet because I just don’t know. If I do bring her back, it will because I don’t trust any other soul to do it. I can leave her a little bit of pride, but others…” His voice trailed off and he blew out a disgusted sigh. “Others would be more concerned with impressing the Claus, obeying the Claus, currying favor. They will care little if they bruise her pride.”

  “It will do more than bruise her pride if she’s brought back here, Rhys.”

  Haunted, he slid Chelly a glance and murmured, “I know.” He glanced back at his workroom. “I need peace and quiet for this, Chel, else you’d be welcome to remain.” Reaching out, he laid a hand on Chelly’s shoulder and squeezed. “Keep working on him, Chelly. He’ll listen to you before anybody else.”

  She scoffed. “Oh no he won’t. He won’t listen to me at all.” Taking a deep breath that made her shoulders rise, then fall, she looked him square in the eye and said, “I’m leaving.”

  Rhys squinted at her. Shook his head. Closed his eyes and pinched the bridge of his nose and then asked, “What did you just say?”

  In a sad voice, Chelly murmured, “You heard me well enough, Rhys.” Wandering away from him, she went to the windows, staring outside. The sprawling vista of the Northern Reach had taken on a decidedly urban look over the past thirty years, greatly changed from when Chelly had first arrived. As their technology had allowed them to better hide their presence from the mortal world, the elves of the Reach had grown bolder.

  It had been her home for half of her life and here lived the man she had loved even before she understood what love truly was. Even when she’d thought Nik was little more than a lonely girl’s daydreams, she had loved him. But she couldn’t remain here any longer. Nik, damn his stubborn hide, had every intention of controlling their daughter for the rest of the poor girl’s life and Chelly couldn’t get through to him.

  At least not in any other way she’d tried.

  What she was getting ready to do would be like giving herself an amputation but sometimes, a desperate woman had to act desperately. “I don’t see any other option, Rhys.”

  He winced and murmured, “Please tell me that you are not asking my assistance.”

  She grinned at him. “If I did, you wouldn’t tell me no, would you, Rhys?”

  Few things truly terrified Rhys. While he wouldn’t bat an eyelash over trying to help Holly in the situation with her father, Rhys had no desire to have anything to do with the problems that Nik was having with his wife. Not even a starving polar bear would be stupid enough to come between Nik and his wife.

  You were fool enough to sleep with his daughter.

  That was different, Rhys insisted to that taunting mental voice. He couldn’t exactly explain how. He did know the answer, he just wasn’t certain he wanted to face it yet. In a reluctant voice, he asked, “Does that mean you’re asking me?”

  Her smile fading, Chelly murmured, “No, Rhys. I won’t ask that of you. You have your plate full right now just trying to deal with Nik and find Holly.” Reaching out, she caught his hand and squeezed. “Find her, Rhys. I’m worried about her.”

  “Holly isn’t a child, Chelly,” Rhys replied.

  “Perhaps not, but she is my child. It hurts to think of letting her go but I know I need to. The fear, though, that’s never going to go away completely.” Reaching up, she tucked her hair behind her ear and forced herself to smile. “At least I’m willing to let her grow up. Nik…”

  “Nik only sees what he wants to see,” Rhys finished for her. “He’s always been that way, Chel. He will not change.”

  Her lids flickered. Lowered. But not before he saw the hope that had been lingering in her eyes wither just a bit more. “No. I don’t imagine he will. Find her, Rhys. I want to know she’s safe, but more, I want to know she’s happy.” She reached out and squeezed his hand. “Keep in touch with Bryan, will you? He’ll know where to find me.”

  A soft, melodious voice filled the workroom, the automated drones announcing Bryan’s arrival. Glancing at Chelly, he said, “Getting a bit crowded in here.”

  Chelly gave him a tense smile. “That’s my ride.”

  “Your…” Rhys turned his head, watched as Bryan came striding through the door. He could still remember when Bryan had been but a lad, lying near death’s door when Nik had brought him to the Reach. Looking back at Chelly, he murmured, “This is going to piss Nik off royally, you know.”

  Chelly shifted from one foot to the other. Nervously, she shrugged. “This isn’t a sudden decision, Rhys. Believe me, I’ve thought it through. I have. I know it’s going to cause some problems for Bryan but my staying will just lead to more heartbreak. It’s just that—”

  “It’s just that Bryan isn’t as afraid of Nik as he is of his mama,” Rhys said in a dry tone.

  Bryan flashed him a wide grin. “Has nothing to do with being afraid of her. Although, naturally, I am.” He sent his mother a smile that had her rolling her eyes and faintly, she smiled back. “Nah, this just has to do with the fact that we’ve seen that Holly is a grown up. But Da…he can’t.”

  “And you’re not overly worried that he’ll send you back to the shops for what you’re getting ready to do?”

  Bryan shook his head. “I don’t see that happening.” Shrugging, he added, “Besides, if I have to, I can make my way in the mortal world. If it comes down to it, that’s what I’ll do.” He slid an arm around Chelly’s shoulders and hugged her, rubbed a soothing hand up and down her back.

  Silence fell and Chelly forced one more wobbly smile for Rhys and then patted Bryan’s arm. “Come on, hon. It’s going to be late when we get there, as it is.”

  Unable to think of anything else to say, Rhys stood there, stunned into speechlessness. It wasn’t until the door slid open and they started to pass through it that anything came to mind. “Chel, you know he isn’t going to let you go so easily.”

  She went still and then slowly turned her head, staring at him over her shoulder. Tears gleamed in her eyes. “You think this is easy?” she asked huskily. Then she simply shook her head and walked into the elevator, her head downcast and her arms wrapped around her body.

  Before the doors slid shut, Rhys caught one last glimpse of her as she leaned against her son.

  “This is messed up,” Rhys muttered, shaking his head and turning back to stare a
t his workroom. He couldn’t keep from remembering the night he’d left here with Holly and they’d ended up in that empty building by the Axis—the heat, the hunger and the need. He remembered following her into the locker room after the lesson here and making love to her against the wall. He’d held a woman in his arms, not a child. Not some criminal who needed to be hunted down and not some recalcitrant teenager, either. A woman.

  Yet what was he getting ready to do?

  Track her down. Bring her back home.

  Back home to a place where her mother wasn’t going to be, to a place where her older brother possibly wouldn’t be. Aside from Rhys, Bryan and Chelly pretty much made up Holly’s circle of friends and that wasn’t just a little sad, it was downright dismal. And if Rhys knew Nik, Nik would react to Holly’s return by putting her under even more strict supervision.

  “Supervision,” Rhys snorted, shaking his head. “No. This isn’t messed up. This is just totally fucked up.”

  Talking to himself really didn’t help all that much and his words bounced off the walls, reminding him of just how silent the workroom was. How empty it felt. He wanted Holly back here. Back with him. But not just for their lessons. As that thought formed in his mind, it was followed closely on the heels of another and he hissed out a breath as something occurred to him.

  Something a little too incomprehensible and more than a little frightening. As the thought formed, he shoved it out of his mind, denying it. It wouldn’t happen. Nik wouldn’t do such a thing, would he?

  Hell.

  Grim thoughts turned even grimmer though as the next three hours passed and he sensed nothing from Holly. He’d taught her well. That was for certain. Well enough that he couldn’t seem to track her beyond the location she’d teleported from. North Hall. Naturally…but the “to” escaped him.

  She’d teleported with a seamless skill that made Rhys realize she’d been holding back on him. Yes she was good, she was talented and she’d shown tremendous growth when it came to controlling her magick but now he realized that Holly had been planning this for a while. Working toward it. There was no other way to explain the deft, smooth transition. A soul new to teleporting left ripples and Rhys had thought he had a good idea of her control.