What Every American Should Know About Europe

by Melissa Rossi

The Knights Hospitallers became legendary for battles with Arabs, but the original charge of the chivalrous group—most of them European aristocrats—was to tend to pilgrims who fell ill while trekking to the Holy Land. Running hospitals in Jerusalem for seventy-four years, the Knights were ousted in 1187, when Saladin’s Arabs took the city. The Knights then sailed to the island of Rhodes, which they fortified so heavily that they remained there safely for two centuries. In 1522, however, Suleyman the Magnificent unleashed 200,000 of his Ottoman fighters, who so ravaged the Knights’ population that the few survivors were given free passage in exchange for a promise they’d stopped attacking Muslims—a false promise, as it turned out. The homeless knights wandered about the Mediterranean until 1530, when Holy Roman Emperor Charles V waved a tempting offer under their noses: if they battled pirates, particularly the Berbers who plundered ships nearing North African waters, they could have Malta. The Knights held their ground well on the island—too well, thought Suleyman, who sent out his warriors again in 1565. This time the Knights, with the help of the locals and the limestone caves that served as shelters from cannonballs, fought back the invaders; when the Ottoman warriors tried to break into villages, they were greeted with swords and vats of hot grease. Ottoman ships sailed back to Turkey after four months, and the Knights rebuilt and refortified the islands splendidly, thanks to their aristocratic tastes and the bags of gold that Charles’s successor, Philip II, paid as reward. The pope sent over his chief engineer, who designed a grid system for Valletta, and Europe’s finest architects and artisans were shipped in to create the most sumptuous palaces of the day. Poets, artists, musicians, and thousands of courtesans turned up as well, as Malta launched its rollicking golden age. Before long, however, the brave Knights had degenerated: famous for battling pirates, the Knights became pirates themselves, not only plucking riches from passing ships, but running a slave trade of the passengers taken captive. By the late eighteenth century, the sodden, bloated Knights couldn’t even hold down their fort. So worthless were the island’s defenders that when Napoleon arrived in 1798, his forces captured Malta without firing a shot.

  Napoleon booted out the Knights and the Inquisitors in 1798, but his fondness for looting gold- and silver-laden churches ensured the French wouldn’t last long. The religious Maltese were so distraught at the theft of the holy riches that they called for British help. Brits sent the French packing in 1800, and kept control of the island—a key Mediterranean port. Officially British territory by 1814, Malta remained a crown colony for a century and a half. And it might have stayed longer had not Dom Mintoff (rightly) had a fit when Britain refused to fork over any Marshall Plan money.

  Bombed during the Second World War, Valletta’s opera house still hasn’t been repaired.

  Despite an outward appearance of happy homogeneity, the Maltese are a deeply divided people. And much of that division stems from the land’s most infamous politician, Dom Mintoff, whom some Maltese worship and some out-and-out despise. Beak-nosed and bespectacled, Rhodes scholar Mintoff flew to fame in the 1950s, grabbing control of the Labor Party and becoming prime minister in 1955. Upset when Britain denied reconstruction funds to Malta—devastated solely because of her association with the British—Mintoff flew another idea: change Malta’s status to more than a colony, but an actual part of Britain, and get Marshall funding that way. The Maltese people backed his idea in a vote; but the British scoffed at the idea. Mintoff stormed out of office—the prime minister’s seat remained vacant for the next five years—and hatched a new plan: independence.

  And that’s when the Catholic Church came into the picture—dividing the island as never before, and so recklessly abusing power that even the pope told local church authorities to back off.

  A DIFFERENT SORT OF INQUISITION

  Civil marriage—marriage outside the Church—is not such a fiery issue today, but in 1960s Malta it was on par with signing your soul to the devil. When Dom Mintoff ran for prime minister in 1962, promising to allow civil marriage on the islands, he might as well have sprouted horns in the view of Malta’s archbishop Sir Michael Gonzi. The archbishop took the extreme step of excommunicating not just Mintoff but his whole Labor Party. Soon called the Iron Archbishop, Gonzi declared that voting Labor—even reading the party’s newspaper—was a mortal sin. The archbishop forced priests to devote entire masses to lecturing about the evils of Labor—and, more outrageously, to use the confessional as a spying tool to discover how parishioners planned to vote. Sinners voting Labor were not absolved—and were told they would be damned to eternal hell if they dared cast a vote for Mintoff’s party. Even children were pushed by priests to grass on their parents and confess the adults’ political affiliations. Whenever Mintoff gave a public speech, the Church drowned it out with the ringing of bells. Priests distributed whistles to the devout Catholic—they were to blow them at Labor gatherings, and were directed to chant, throw stones, or do whatever was required (murder was hinted at) to ensure Labor did not win the election. The archbishop won that round at least. The Labor Party finished second, and Mintoff came into parliament as opposition leader only to see the Nationalists lead the country to the independence he’d campaigned for. But the archbishop’s actions had raised plenty of eyebrows in Rome; the pope finally shipped over a replacement in 1969.

  Mintoff finally snatched back the premiership in 1971, and went on a rampage. He upped fees to the British to use Malta for bases, charging an exorbitant $40 million annually, which was initially used to fund education. Several years later, he pushed the British out of port, along with NATO. Disgusted by the supposed white knights of the Cold War, he befriended Libya’s Muammar Qaddafi (who gave him great prices on oil) and North Korea’s Kim il-Sung, the slightly less nutty father of current leader Kim Jong-il. Mintoff invited Soviet ships to refuel at the facilities NATO had built, signed a multimillion-dollar trade agreement with Russia, and nearly derailed a 1975 U.S.-Soviet global arms agreement because he wouldn’t sign. Increasingly autocratic, Mintoff took on the Church—seizing property, barring priests from visiting prisons, and outlawing religious schools—and his alleged henchmen made high-profile appearances on Malta’s streets. Many of Mintoff’s political foes soon disappeared; some fled, and at least one turned up dead. The Mintoff administration began talking of making Malta a one-party country, and there was little dissent in parliament, at least in 1981. That year, the Nationalist Party won the majority of votes, but Labor took the most seats—and the Nationalists walked out in protest. By 1984, Malta was a mess. Tourism was down, foreign investors had pulled out, and unemployment shot up to 20 percent. Mintoff, under pressure, finally pushed back his chair from the prime minister’s desk.

  Mintoff made Malta stand out for all the wrong reasons, and when he stood down as prime minister in 1984, many heaved a sigh of relief. (However, he wasn’t done with politics: he simply took a place in Malta’s House of Representatives.) When the Nationalists, with Eddie Fenech Adami at the helm, took over running the country in 1987, they sought to undo almost all that Mintoff had done. Adami welcomed NATO ships back into port and signed Malta up for NATO’s Partnership for Peace program. The prime minister also reached out to Europe, and in the early 1990s began negotiating for Malta’s entry into the EU. That move blew up in his face; in 1996, voters threw the Nationalists out of power. The new Labor government pulled Malta out of the NATO group and ditched plans to enter the EU. The appearance of Malta in the 2004 enlargement looked most unlikely—until, that is, Mintoff rattled the country again.

  By then seventy-two years of age, Mintoff, who was rabidly against joining the EU, apparently didn’t see what he was doing that tumultuous day in 1998, when he ripped the carpet from under his own party. Mintoff had made no secret that he had little respect for Labor’s new leader, Prime Minister Alfred Sant, who was Harvard-educated and modern. When parliament was voting on giving the Knights of Malta their own sovereign state on a Maltese fort, Mintoff snapped. Not only did he not like the idea,
he didn’t like Sant, and he so ripped the prime minister over the next hour that the House of Representatives fell apart. Sant was forced to call early elections when he lost a no-confidence vote, and Labor lost. Nationalist prime minister Adami was soon on the phone to Brussels putting Malta back on the road for EU entry, assuring the enlargement commissioner that yes, this time, Malta’s application would stick.

  Hot Spots

  Valletta: The sixteenth-century palaces shimmer as the sun drops into the red bay in this fortress city, built up by Malta’s Knights. Renowned as one of the world’s finest showcases of Baroque, capital Valletta was also one of the first European cities designed on a grid. Space is getting tight in Grand Harbor, where cruise ships vie for moorage with NATO warships.

  Mdina: The walled city on the island of Gozo is a tumble of garden-wrapped squares, sixteenth-century cathedrals and palaces (still owned by nobles) housing valuable Renaissance paintings, including the famous Beheading of St. John by Caravaggio.

  Valletta: Famous for her wild knights

  Malta’s second-largest island Gozo claims that she was made famous by Homer’s Odyssey: it was here, Gozans claim, that the sea nymph Calypso nursed Ulysses back to health, keeping him captive for seven years, but never convincing him to marry. Homer called the island Ogygia.

  Birds’ balconies: Back in the 1500s, when respectable women were forced to stay at home (making lace, one supposes) while the menfolk went out cavorting, the gals could watch the movements of their guys from balconies with far-reaching views—and potential consequences, considering the place was chockablock with courtesans.

  Summer homes: With Malta already one of the most densely populated chunks of land in the world, the Maltese government negotiated EU waivers to prevent Europeans from buying second homes on their island. After Malta became independent in 1964, the British kept hanging around for another decade, until the Maltese pressured many out of their summer cottages.

  The media: Both major parties own their own newspapers, TV, and radio stations—in which they air the dirty laundry of the other party’s politicians.

  Freemason lodges: Never mind that none is officially registered with the police, freemasons and secret societies are rumored to run rampant on the islands.

  Although it’s part of Malta mythology—February 10 is the Feast of St. Paul’s Shipwreck—some religious scholars say Paul’s ship did not hit the rocks here, but in Greece.2

  Maltese territorial waters: When the Maltese government recently sent out a team to survey the coastal shelf for petroleum, the Libyan navy blocked the move and sent the ship packing back to Malta. Now Libya is muscling into Malta’s oil exploration.

  Hotshots

  Eddie Fenech Adami: President, 2004–present; Prime Minister, 1987–1995 and 1998–2004. Devout Catholic and Nationalist Adami is a man of his word. He vowed to get Malta into the EU (succeeding in 2004), and vowed to resign from the premiership when he turned seventy in 2003; he did, simply walking into the presidential role instead.

  Lawrence Gonzi: Prime Minister, 2004–present. Nationalist Gonzi is also devout. It may be in his genes: his uncle Sir Michael Gonzi was the “Iron Archbishop” who led the anti-Labor movement of the 1960s.

  Birdlife Malta: The organization that tends to wounded winged creatures and campaigns for bird rights, is often under fire from hunters. Some active members have received death threats.

  Adami led the Maltese flock into the EU

  Knights of Malta: They once brought hospitals, churches, and palaces to Malta, along with plenty of prostitutes. Now supposedly a do-gooder group, they number in the tens of thousands and are considering starting their own mini-country—complete with passports, stamps, and postal system—in the same Maltese fort where they fought off Ottoman invaders in 1565. The organization also plays a starring role in numerous conspiracy theories.

  Notes

  Unless otherwise noted, all information in “Fast Facts” boxes is from the handy 2006 edition of the CIA’s World Factbook.

  Chapter 1: France

  1. Forbes Global 2000 for 2005.

  2. Source: EU: Financial Report of European Agricultural Guidance and Guarantee Fund, Annexe 11, Évolution des Dépenses du Feoga—garantie par état membre.

  3. Paul Gallis, “France: Factors Shaping Foreign Policy and Issues in U.S.-French Relations,” CRS Report for Congress, Congressional Research Service, Jan. 3, 2006.

  4. Source: BBC.

  5. Bruce Crumley and Adam Smith, “Sisters in Hell,” Time International, Dec. 2, 2002.

  6. Ibid.

  7. Lowell Ponte, “France’s Rising Right,” FrontPage Magazine (www.frontpagemag.com), Apr. 23, 2002.

  8. So sniffed U.S. State Department spokesman Richard Boucher.

  9. So admonished Christopher Hitchens in the Wall Street Journal, “The Rat That Tried to Roar,” Feb. 6, 2003.

  10. “In Pursuit of Genius: Jean-Antoine Houdon and the Sculpted Portraits of Benjamin Franklin,” Philadelphia Museum of Art (http://www.philamuseum.org/exhibitions/special/97.html).

  11. So estimates Napoleon expert Paul Johnson, as noted in Stephen Goode’s “Napoleon’s Legacy leads to Gulag…,” Insight Magazine, Sept. 12, 2003.

  12. Dan Bloch, “Bonaparte Founded G-Men,” Washington Star, Aug. 18, 1935 (http://www.fbi.gov/libref/historic/history/historic_doc/docstar.htm).

  13. Rashid Tlemcani, “Islam in France: The French Have Themselves to Blame,” Middle East Quarterly, Mar. 1997.

  14. Source: Library of Congress Country Studies: Algeria, “France in Algeria, 1830–1862.”

  15. Robert Hughes, “Sublime Windbag: Writer, Lover, National Hero, Victor Hugo…,” Time, Apr. 27, 1998.

  16. “Franco-Prussian War,” Microsoft Encarta Online Encyclopedia, 2004.

  17. Figure according to Globalsecurity.org.

  18. “Pétain’s Crimes Still Split French,” Jerusalem Post–AP, Aug. 2, 1995.

  19. Richard Cavendish, “Months Past: Death of Marshal Pétain,” History Today, July 1, 2001.

  20. Sources: Wikipedia, The Free Encyclopedia (en.wikipedia.org); New Statesman & Society; The Economist.

  21. Information drawn from numerous sources, including Library of Congress Country Studies: Algeria and Robert Rinehart, Countries of the World: Algeria.

  22. Source: EU: Financial Report of European Agricultural Guidance and Guarantee Fund, Annexe 11, Évolution des Dépenses du Feoga—garantie par état membre.

  23. “Cometh the Hour, Cometh the Ghost,” The Economist, Oct. 20, 2005.

  24. As noted on “About France” (www.ambafrance-au.org/aboutfrance/home.en.htm).

  25. Dominique Pobel and Jean-Francois Viel, “Case-Control Study of Leukaemia Among Young People Near La Hague Nuclear Reprocessing Plant…,” British Medical Journal, Jan. 11, 1997.

  26. Paul Webster, “Le Pen: Populist Who Rose from Ashes,” The Guardian (London), Apr. 22, 2002.

  Chapter 2: Germany

  1. Forbes Global 2000 for 2005.

  2. See: “Background Notes,” Germany-info.org.

  3. Christopher Booker and Richard North, The Great Deception: The Secret History of the European Union. London: Continuum, 2003.

  4. Source: CIA World Factbook (www.cia.gov/cia/publications/factbook/).

  5. Margaret MacMillan, Paris 1919: Six Months That Changed the World. New York: Random House, 2001: p. 161.

  6. Source: “Weimar Republic,” Wikipedia, The Free Encyclopedia (en.wikipedia.org).

  7. Ibid.

  8. Source: “Adolf Hitler,” Wikipedia, The Free Enyclopedia (en.wikipedia.org).

  9. Dorothea von Schwanenfluegel Lawson, “World War Memories,” Germanculture.com.

  10. Matthew White’s war-death statistics Web site (http://users.erols.com/mwhite28/warstat1.htm).

  11. “Germany’s Deadly Legacy,” German Life, July 31, 1997.

  12. Jacob Hellbrunn, “Springtime: Germany’s Newfound Strength,” The New Republic, Oct. 16, 1995.

  13. �
��History of the Federal Republic of Germany,” Wikipedia, The Free Encylcopedia (en.wikipedia.org).

  Chapter 3: United Kingdom

  1. Forbes Global 2000 for 2005.

  2. Source: WTO.

  3. “United Kingdom: Unemployment,” European Foundation for the Improvement of Living and Working Conditions (www.eurofound.eu.int).

  4. The 2001 report by Professor David Warburton of the University of Reading is discussed by Richard Alleyne, “Celebrity Chefs Dish Up Dinner Party Neurosis,” The Daily Telegraph (UK), Dec. 4, 2001.

  5. Alan Travis, Richard Norton-Taylor, and Rosie Cowan, “July 7 Reports Fail to Silence Inquiry Calls,” The Guardian (London), May 11, 2006 (http://www.guardian.co.uk/attackonlondon/story/0,,1772161,00.html).

  6. “Hamza’s Sermons,” The Telegraph (London), Feb. 8, 2006, (http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/main.jhtml?xml=/news/2006/02/08/nhamz408.xml&sSheet=/news/2006/02/08/ixnewstop.html).

  7. Kevin Sullivan, “Foes of Foreigners grow vocal in Britain,” The Washington Post, May 4, 2006.

  8. “British National Party,” Wikipedia, The Free Encyclopedia (en.wikipedia.org).

  9. Jamie David, “Expelled BNP Founder Plans Court Battle,” Aug. 24, 2003 (http://politics.guardian.co.uk/farright/story/0,11375,1028498,00.html).

  10. Nick Cohen, “Bigots, Racists, and Worthless Buffoons…” The Observer (London), May 7, 2006 (http://www.guardian.co.uk/commentisfree/story/0,,1769485,00.html?gusrc=rss).

  11. “Life of Crime: Yob Culture,” BBC News, (http://news.bbc.co.uk/hi/english/static/in_depth/uk/2001/life_of_crime/yob_culture.stm).

  12. Assorted organizations, including UN Development Program, International Adult Literacy Survey, and Organization for Economic Cooperation and Development.