Helga- Out of Hedgelands

by Rick Johnson

  Breister said nothing. He saw there was no reason to argue with WooZan further.

  “Come. Come with me and we will eat with the WooSheep brethren. It is the time of Common Bowl.”

  WooZan showed Breister a small boat, just large enough for the two of them and her attendant. They boarded the boat and the servant began to paddle through the darkness. Leaving the Golden Grotto, WooZan explained: “The Golden Grotto is a place for retreat and reflection only. I, WooZan, come here daily to reflect on my duties as chieftain. Woonyaks are also brought there immediately after being rescued. It assures them that they are truly safe and delivered after their terror. The entire community of WooSheep comes here on the Days of Great Light—the days when the light is brightest from the LuteWoo. Hunjah!”

  “But how do you live down here?” Breister wanted to know. He could not believe that beasts could actually survive in such a place. As they left the Golden Grotto, the darkness gradually again became so intense that Breister could not see WooZan, although she sat just a few feet away. “Surely you can’t just live...”

  “Just live here like ‘normal’ beasts?” WooZan said, shaking her head. “Woonyaks are all the same. You do not believe, yet. But you will believe when you see! Hunjah!”

  Although the complete darkness left Breister unable to see anything, WooZan’s servant seemed to paddle with a purpose toward a definite destination. Then, they apparently rounded a corner and Breister saw a dazzling sight. Thousands of lanterns glittered within a huge, water-filled grotto. “Welcome, Woonyak, to WooPeace,” WooZan said. “Hunjah!”

  Breister was astounded. Hundreds of houses were carved into the rock. Wherever he looked, lanterns twinkled in rock-hewn windows. The rock-houses were built at all heights. Some were just above water level. Others were far up the sides of the grotto, reached by narrow, winding stairways carved in the rock. “The OmpotoWoo gives us our life,” WooZan observed. “Wood and other items from smashed boats, other kinds of driftwood, fresh fish, and new Woonyaks who join and refresh our folk!”

  Breister had lost all sense of time. How long had he been below the surface of the earth? What day was it? What time was it? Such questions seemed not to matter to WooZan.

  Tying up the boat at a landing, WooZan stepped out of the boat and said, “Come, join in the Common Bowl; you are welcome among us. Hunjah!”

  Breister followed WooZan up several flights of stairs onto a large landing where many creatures were gathered to eat. The WooSheep, Breister saw, were not all Sheep. There were many other kinds of beasts as well—Foxes, Cougars, Coyotes, Goats, Badgers, and Rabbits.

  WooZan watched Breister’s reaction to what he was seeing. “Yes, the WooSheep are a diverse folk,” she commented. “Woonyaks come from many clans. But any who join the life of the WooSheep become one of us. The WooPeace is for all. Our life is for all. Our hospitality is for all.”

  And the hospitality was, indeed, marvelous, Breister discovered. He feasted with the WooSheep until his gut hurt. The WooSheep used fire in their candles, oil lanterns, and a few other ways, but not in their cooking. All food was eaten raw, usually marinated in a vast array of tasty sauces. Fish was the basic staple of the WooSheep diet, but the array of fish dishes was vast. On his first plateful, Breister had Shadowgrass and Smeed Smod Salad, Spicy Salamander Soup, Thick Cave Bass Frumplets, Deep Grotto Bat Cream Sauce, and Rawski Booglehead Filets with Moondles. Breister would not have believed such scrumptious foods could exist underground. His stomach was definitely impressed with the WooPeace!

  Breister learned that the WooSheep used almost every element of the underground world for something. In a world that Breister had thought was limited, the WooSheep had found great abundance. As Breister ate happily and laughed with his new friends, he felt a deep sense of love and acceptance. The WooSheep warmly opened their life to him. He felt accepted and happy. Yet, one question kept puzzling him.

  “The river pours so much water into the underground,” Breister asked. “Where does it all go? The water level does not rise, although there is constantly new water pouring in through the OmpotoWoo...The water is getting out somewhere. Your folk are brilliant, WooZan; surely they have explored this question. Surely, the water must somehow flow out. Isn’t there a way to follow the water out of here?”

  “All Woonyaks think this way at first,” WooZan replied. “They constantly fight against the reality of our life. Until they discover that the only peace is to become part of the WooPeace. There is no peace apart from the WooPeace. Hunjah!”

  “Has any beast ever tried?” Breister asked again.

  WooZan looked at Breister solemnly. “There is no peace apart from the WooPeace. It is the only way. All Woonyaks come to see this. So, too, will you,” WooZan repeated.

  “But has anyone tried?” Breister asked with firm resolve. “Has anyone tried to find a different way than just sitting here accepting the story that there is no way out?”

  “It is not a story, friend,” WooZan replied sharply. “There is only one way and that is the way of the WooPeace. To go apart from it is to die. Hunjah!”

  “But, WooZan, I keep asking you if any beasts have tried?” Breister said.

  “There is no peace apart from the WooPeace. To go apart from it is to die,” WooZan repeated. “This is the truth you must find. You will find it for yourself. The water flows out in a myriad of small springs and seepages, but there is no river flowing out. The only way to survive is the WooPeace. But you must find this truth for yourself. Spend some days and nights in the Golden Grotto. Meditate on its beauty and the bounty and fellowship you have found here. Rejoice in the miracle that saved your life. Reflect on the reality of the situation. You will find your way into the WooPeace. We will warmly welcome you. You will become family to us. All Woonyaks feel the same. We show them the Golden Grotto and the WooPeace and give them time in the Golden Grotto to meditate. They all come to understand the truth. There is no peace apart from the WooPeace. Hunjah!”

  “Thank you, WooZan,” Breister said. “I appreciate your kindness, but I already have a family. Tomorrow, I will begin my work of finding my daughter.”

  Later, as WooZan and her servant conducted Breister back to the Golden Grotto, neither said anything. In this instance, both knew what the other was thinking.

  Before turning in to sleep in the Golden Grotto, Breister sat gazing out through the LuteWoo. One by one, he saw stars begin to twinkle in the night sky. They passed before his gaze, as the turning earth brought different stars past the LuteWoo ‘window.’ It seemed to Breister that the ‘other world’ was spinning past him as he lay helplessly alone, deep within the earth.

  Slasher Annie Meets WooZan

  Water from the OmpotoWoo fell in a downpour on the figure of Slasher Annie. Sprawled across a piece of debris from her smashed boat, she struggled out of the main flow of the waterfall. Dazed and hurt by the fall through the whirlpool and the destruction of her stolen boat, Annie felt a little uncertain whether she was dead or alive. As she considered her situation, she realized that she seemed to be alive, but she wasn’t sure what that meant at that moment.

  “Where am I?” she thought to herself. “Am I dead and this is the gates of the underworld? Or is this some underground lake?” In the complete blackness, her eyes were useless. The downpour from the waterfall was deafening, making it impossible to hear beyond the closest sounds. It was as if everything she had known before had vanished.

  Panic-stricken, Annie slashed at the water, paddling with all her strength. Unable to see where she was going, she had no direction or goal, except to escape the unending sound and flow of the cascading water. The terrified Cougar swam with insane intensity. Trying to get...where?

  At last, finding nothing but water and more water, unable to escape the roar of the falls, crazed with the terror that perhaps this was eternity and there was no escape, Annie sank into exhausted immobility, sobbing with the terror of one completely without hope of safety and deliverance.


  “Hunjah! Woonyak!” Peering into the intense blackness with eyes closed to narrow slits by fear, Slasher Annie could see nothing. Then a strong grasp pulled her into a boat. Feeling a strange sense of peace flood over her, Annie did not lash out with her claws as would usually have been her instinctive response to such a situation. Instead she went limp with exhaustion and collapsed in the bottom of WooZan’s boat.

  In the Bone Forest

  Helga’s small party followed the sand ridge for several days. Gradually, the terrain began to change. The watery marshes and wetlands of the Drownlands gave way to firmer ground and drier country. With each step they left the Drownlands further behind and the land became sun-baked and harsh.

  The rugged land became more and more difficult to travel. When not strewn with rocks, hillsides were slippery with sand. Finding it too exhausting to climb the forbidding bluffs or sandy slopes, the tiny band followed an easier, but somewhat longer route along the lower, more level ground.

  The lush marshes of the Drownlands gave way to bare, yellow-brown sandstone as far as the eye could see. Except for scattered patches of dry grass, there was no vegetation. With each step they took, there was less evidence of water. The provisions they had carried with them would soon be gone. Especially, their dwindling water supply was of great concern.

  Ominously, they came upon what appeared to be the remains of one of King Stuppy’s exploring parties. Strung out across the treeless waste, one by one, they came upon the skeletons of the King’s explorers sent to look for the Mountain That Moves But Stands Still.

  “Look at these fools!” Bwellina commented as they walked past the gruesome remains. “They died rather than leave their banners, golden ensigns, uniforms, and weapons behind.”

  “It’s true,” Helga replied. “Although they were dying of thirst, they never discarded their heavy uniforms and still carried along their useless paraphernalia!”

  “And still dragging their canoe!” Burwell observed, shaking his head in disbelief. “Miles and miles from water, dropping dead one by one, yet even to the last beast, carrying King Stuppy’s golden ensign...” Burwell’s voice trailed off as he stood looking down at the eerie remains. “This poor beast staggered a few more steps beyond the last of his comrades, clutching the heavy gold, and then collapsed with it wrapped in his arms. Poor fool—”

  “There, but for the blessing of the Ancient Ones, go we,” Helga replied grimly. “We may well be fools in other ways. Just because we avoid one road to folly, does not mean we will not take another. If we do not find water soon, we will perish just as surely.”

  “Well, the Ancient Ones are all about us,” Bwellina exclaimed, pointing ahead. “It is no wonder they call this the Bone Forest!”

  Massive bones poked out at all angles from eroded hills and bluffs. An ancient graveyard of giant beasts was being revealed by the erosion of centuries.

  “The Bone Forest!” Helga breathed, feeling for the first time real hope that perhaps she could find her father. The astonishing sight of ancient fossils, and the recent reminder of how deadly this land could be, left Burwell and Bwellina in solemn silence. It seemed hard to be hopeful. But Helga’s heart was truly happy for the first time in many months. Had her father been here? Had he gazed at this landscape she was now seeing? Would she find clues here that would help her find him? Somehow, she sensed she was on his track.

  Helga’s band of stalwart friends trudged onward, moving deeper into the Bone Forest. Burwell lagged behind, awe-struck by the fossilized bones. He began climbing up an eroded hillside.

  “Burwell!” Bwellina called. “Where in the name of good beasts are you going?”

  “This is the land I have always dreamed about,” Burwell yelled back, excitedly. “Since I was a wee beast, sittin’ on my Mama’s lap, I’ve been hearing stories of the Ancient Ones, the greatest beasts that ever lived, the giants of old! Here they are! All around us! I want to pay my respects. I want to imagine what it was like when they ruled the earth! I want to sit a while among them. Just a little while, my dear...Just a little while on the hill taking it all in. Yep! Yep! Yep!” Burwell kept climbing.

  Helga looked at Bwellina and sighed. “Well, I guess we could sit a spell and rest,” she mused.

  “But, Helga,” Bwellina protested, “every second we sit, I become thirstier, and my life ebbs away. If we don’t keep moving, we have no hope of finding water. We’ll sit here and become dusty bones ourselves! We’ve got to keep moving.” She called after Burwell again. “Burwell! Now you come back here. You can look at the Ancient Ones anytime you want—just as soon as we find water! Get back here, you sun-silly scalawag!”

  “No, my dear,” the old dog wheezed back, as he continued his scramble up the hillside. “I’ll not just walk by the remains of the Ancient Ones without remembering them with due respect. I’ve waited my whole life for this chance, which I never thought I’d get. I’d rather die of thirst than move on just now! Yep! Yep! Yep!”

  “Let’s do wait a bit,” Helga said to Bwellina. A few minutes cannot hurt us that much...and Burwell is right. I have so often called on the memory of the Ancient Ones to help me...I want to do what is proper.” She stopped and reached for the water pouch slung over her shoulder. “Here, Bwellina, wash your mouth out with a sip of water...Just a small sip, we have to make it last as long as we can.”

  Taking a sip for herself, Helga swished it around in her parched mouth, savoring it. Slumping down by a boulder, which provided some shade, she gazed across the expanse of the Bone Forest. She felt an overpowering sense of gratitude. “Oh, thank you, Ancient Ones, thank you,” she breathed. Helga’s reliance on the help of the Ancient Ones had never failed her. Surely, somehow they would assist her.

  WooSheep Bottoms

  “Lookee out ya big galoop! Here I come! YAHOOOO!” KER-SPLASH! Winert Otter landed in the swimming hole, creating a tremendous wave, right beside Ferrker Coyote. Both of them laughed as the huge splash washed over them. It was almost the end of summer and Winert, Ferrker, and their other best friend, Snorrnt Sheep were among the several dozen other youngsters enjoying the swimming hole at WooSheep Bottoms.

  “WheeZEEE! LOOOK AT ME!” Snorrnt screamed happily as he swung on a long rope out over the shady pool and let go. KER-SPLOOSH! He was followed by others swinging on several other ropes from other directions. KER-SPLASH-SPLASH-SPLASH-SPLOOSH! Happy little beasts ran to swing again, pushing and shoving to get in line.

  Swimming back to the bank, Snorrnt was about to yell, “You can’t make one like that, you big galoop!” when he stopped. “Who in the world is that?” he wondered, seeing a dusty old Dog standing on a hilltop not far away. The stranger’s clothes were worn and dirty, and he looked very tired.

  But, he soon learned the old beast was not too tired to run. In a flash, he was running full speed down the hill and diving, clothes and all, into the pool! Burwell Oswego had never felt such a glorious feeling in all his life. His worn, tired, parched body was immersed in the most wonderful cool, clear water! “YAAHOOOO! GOORGLE-OOOO! SPLASH! SPLOOSH!” Leaping and diving like some crazed monster fish, Burwell left all the young beasts howling with laughter at his antics.

  Finally, exhausted, he pulled himself up on the bank, gasping happily for breath. “Woooo, whew...That was so wonderful,” he wheezed with contented delight. Gazing dreamily out of his half-closed eyes, he might have simply dozed happily off into a nap, had he not seen a sight that made him burst out in wheezing laughter.

  Bwellina was running down the hillside toward him. Helga hobbled quickly after her, also heading straight for the swimming hole. KER-SPLASH-SPLASH! Clothes and all, she too plunged in with glorious joy!

  Winert and Ferrker looked at one another. “Wow!” Ferrker said, “Hey, Cow-Lady, that was super!”

  Helga, spouting cool, clear water out of her mouth, laughed. “You haven’t seen anything yet! Just let me have a chance at that rope swing and I’ll show you some waves you’ll remember!”

  The t
ravelers discovered that for many, many miles they had been struggling along within easy reach of water. The dry lands they had been traveling sat atop a wealth of underground water. Spreading out from the Drownlands, the huge aquifer was completely hidden in most places. What seemed to be a “barren wasteland” actually contained plenty of water, if you knew where to look. The top of the vast reservoir was deep underground in some places, but as at the swimming hole, it was at the surface in valleys between hills. Water so close to the surface produced a large number of lakes, “wet” meadows, and constantly flowing streams—in close proximity to large expanses of parched lands. WooSheep Bottoms, as residents called the area, had an abundant, but mostly invisible, supply of water.

  “Had we only climbed to the hilltops sooner...” Helga thought ruefully, as she sat on the bank splashing in the cool water. “But I guess the Ancient Ones had their own ways,” she reflected. “There probably is a reason that I should be here. That is the way of the Ancient Ones.” The happy yells of the young beasts swimming and splashing seemed to assure Helga’s heart that she, too, could again be happy.

  The travelers were invited to join in the annual community picnic that was being held that day. In a shady grove of cottonwood trees, all the beasts of WooSheep Bottoms were gathered. Helga was surprised to find that the ‘WooSheep’ were actually, for the most part, not Sheep at all.