The Line That Holds The Kite

by J E McDonald

  “I’d just got my driving licence, my mum bought me a car for passing, it was a BMW M4 in black, we were cruising around London, thinking was gangsters. It must have been fifteen minutes later, we were being chased by police, so I increased the speed and started weaving through traffic, we weas driving so fast. I was shouting at the boys to put their seat belts on, and they did, except for Craig, he was so hyped up, laughing and arsing around. I kept telling him, put the belt on, but he wasn’t listening, I tried to slow down, but I lost control of the car, we was swerving across the road, we smashed into a lamp-post, I was thrown forward, smashed into the stirring wheel, I was knocked out.” My breathing is so heavy, palms sweating, I can feel the tears rolling down my face, I don’t look at Ellie, I can’t. I just continue.

  “When I regained consciousness, I was on a stretcher in the middle of the street, paramedics were fitting an oxygen mask to my face, Ryan and Charlie was already sitting in the back of the ambulance, they wasn’t as banged up as I was, just some cuts and bruises. I tried to sit up on the stretcher, Ryan ran over to me, pushed me back down, he whispered for me to keep quiet. As I was lifted into the ambulance, I seen the car, it was destroyed, there was blood and glass everywhere, and there was a body inside the car, in the driver’s seat, Craig’s body.” I stopped, my chest felt like it was caving in, I couldn’t breathe, I was sobbing, I felt Ellie’s arms go around me, before I even knew she had moved, she held me against her as I sobbed.

  “It wasn’t your fault Nathan, it was an accident, you lost control of the car, he didn’t put his seat belt on.” Ellie’s voice sounded so far away; I was consumed by the guilt I had buried almost three years ago. When I found my voice again, it came out like a strangled sob.

  “It was my fault Ellie, I was driving the car, he smashed his head into the front window, his mother couldn’t even see him one last time before she buried him, his head and face was so fucked up! It was my idea to go out in the car, everything was always my idea, they all just followed my lead like fucking lapdogs. All because my dad left me, and I couldn’t handle it. I turned into a heartless bastard!”. My body was shuddering as I continued to cry against her, clinging onto her, terrified if I let go, she would run.

  “What happened? Did you go to jail?” Ellie asked me, and the fact that she was still sitting here, wanting to know more, it baffled me.

  “No, I found out later, Ryan and Charlie dragged me out of the car before the police and ambulance got there, they put Craig in the driver’s seat, so the police thought it was him driving, the front of the car had mine and his blood splattered all over it, mixed together, it was believable. My dad, to this day, I still don’t know what he did, but his money made it all go away. We just, got away with it.” The sobbing stopped, my breathing started to shallow, but I still clung onto to Ellie.

  “So, all the trouble back home now? That is because of the accident?” she asks me, whilst rubbing my back, comforting me, I don’t deserve it nor do I understand, why hasn’t she run?

  “Yeah, I killed him, his brother couldn’t let it go, he wants revenge, he won’t stop until he has killed us, two down, there is only me left, Ryan told me, when he was dying in my arms. He said it was for Craig, and I was next. I wasn’t scared, I relished it, I wanted him to come for me, I deserved it, I did kill him, and I got away with it. And the guilt for Ryan, that was on me too, he is dead because of me, of what I did. I wasn’t going to come to New York, but Jack, he begged me too, said he couldn’t lose another brother, said mum was in danger, as long as I was in London. So, I moved here, like a coward, I ran.” I finally look at her, her eyes are red, and she is silently crying, but still she doesn’t let go. Neither of us say anything for a few minutes.

  *

  “This isn’t your fault, you didn’t kill Ryan, and you didn’t intentionally kill Craig, you made a mistake, but you didn’t force anyone to get in that car, you all got in it willingly, by choice. You wasn’t the one who covered it up, the other boys did, and so did your dad. You can’t keep blaming yourself, carrying this guilt.” Ellie says and I am floored, how can she possible justify this, still want to stick around, now she knows the truth? She presses her lips to my forehead, again I break down into sobs, I pull her tight and cry into her neck. I don’t know how long we sit like this.

  Chapter fifty – Nathan

  If you had told me four months ago that I would be spending Christmas and New year at home in London with both my parents, their partners, my two brothers and Ellie. I would never have believed it.

  Ellie is honestly the best thing that has ever happened to me. If I would never have met her, god knows where I would be now.

  It’s New Year’s Eve and also Jack’s eighteenth birthday. When we landed at Heathrow my dad had organised for a Bentley to collect us, obviously pulling out all the stops for Jack, like a fancy car will make up for his Houdini act. Once we were dropped off at my mother’s house the car then drove Ellie home to her parents for Christmas, she had only been away from me for a week and I couldn’t settle, it was like someone had cut off my arm. When I woke to find her lying next to me, I felt like my arm had been reattached.

  “Morning baby.” I wrap my arms and legs around her; I feel her giggle as she twists her body around to face me.

  “Morning Sunshine.” She wraps her arms around my waist and leans in, kissing me softly on the lips, she smells of lemons and Chanel chance Eau Vive. My favourite smell in the world.

  “When did you get back?” I say in between kisses.

  “Hmm about an hour ago, I didn’t want to wake you, you look so cute when you sleep.” She kisses the tip of my nose and my whole-body warms.

  “Cute? Not rugged and manly?” I tease.

  “No cute! You’re rugged and manly when you’re awake, or naked.” She grins at me and again I feel heat rise from my feet to my head.

  It’s been four weeks since I told her the truth of what happened with Craig and Ryan, the way she has handled it, has made me love her even more, the fact that she forgave and accepted me, still astounds me. I don’t think I have ever been this happy and content. Once we get new year out of the way, we are going to her parents together for a couple of days before we fly back out to New York. Apparently her family refuse to let her leave before they have met me, seeing as I have never met a girl’s parents, I am terrified, even more so because I don’t think I will know what to do if they don’t like me or realise she is way too good for me.

  “What are we doing today? What’s the plan for Jack’s birthday?” Ellie asks as I kiss her neck and collar bone, I hear a little moan escape her lips and I smile against her throat.

  “Well first of all, I’m doing you.” I say as I roll on top of her, she giggles, and it is my favourite sound in the world.

  Chapter Fifty-One - Ellie

  “Hi El, I didn’t know you was here.” Jack says as I walk into the kitchen holding hands with Nathan. His mother lives in a 19th century, grade II listed townhouse in Belgravia, it has seven floors, swimming pool, gym, sauna, a lift to each floor and 24hr concierge. It is without a shadow of a doubt, the most beautiful house I have ever seen or been inside of. I honestly thought the house and apartment in New York was extraordinary, but this house takes the trophy. It is modern but still has the original features, just meticulously restored. Every room and hallway are immaculate and decorated to the most luxurious standard, right down to the floors and ceilings. His mother has exquisite taste.

  “Hi Jack, Happy birthday!” I say as I hug him. When I pull away, a beautiful, blonde woman strolls into the kitchen with the warmest smile. I instantly know she is their mother. She is dressed in a violet, pussy-bow cashmere jumper, which compliments her eyes and pale complexion, grey cigarette trousers and Chanel ballet flats. Her teeth are perfect, she must be around 9 stone and 40 odd years of classy perfection. I cannot for the life of me, see any reason for Michael Crane to up and leave this woman. I have seen and spent a lot of time with Casey in recent months,
and she is a very pretty woman, but even being half the age of Lillian Wade, she has not got a patch on her.

  “You must be the famous Ellie who has got my eldest boy head-over-heels.” Lillian pulls me in for an embrace, I say embrace because hug just wouldn’t cut it.

  “Hi, it is lovely to finally meet you, Ms Wade.” I say and my voice shakes slightly on the end. Why am I so nervous?

  “Darling girl call me Lilly. Did you enjoy being home with your family? I am sure they miss you terribly, as I do my boys.” Lilly says everything with a smile that makes her eyes crinkle, the only tell-tale sign of her age. She moves to Nathan and hugs him so tight, as if it’s the first hug she has gotten out of him in years. Maybe it is.

  “Morning mum, can we stop embarrassing Ellie now? What’s for breakfast?” he says whilst kissing her on the cheek and brushing a strand of her hair away from her eyes, in a loving gesture. I swear I see her eyes flood, but she composes herself quickly.

  “Franco has made eggs benedict.” Lilly says clearing her throat. I smile as Nathan pulls me to sit with him at the breakfast bar.

  “Where is dad? And Matthew?” Nathan asks as he starts eating his eggs.

  “They went back to the Dorchester about an hour ago, Casey was calling his phone incessantly. She seems needy that one.” I chuckle at Lilly’s jibe.

  “I wouldn’t know, I haven’t paid a blind bit of notice to slutty the entire time I’ve lived with them.” Nathan says in-between mouthfuls.

  “Nathan, you know how I feel about that language, I don’t care how old you are, or how true it is!” she scolds him, and he genuinely laughs.

  The rest of the day goes by like this, warm laughter and genuine happiness. Around noon Lilly’s partner comes home, apparently, he is some sort of doctor, and he is as handsome as Nathan’s father, just opposite, where Michael Crane is Dark haired and tanned skin, Dr Thomas Carrol is fair. He looks at Lilly like she hung the moon, it’s the sweetest thing.

  Once 8pm rolls around we are all dressed in black-tie attire and celebrating News year’s eve and Jack’s eighteenth birthday in the Dorchester hotel. The room where the party is being held is decadent with chandeliers hanging from the ceiling, chairs covered in taffeta silk, and the centre pieces on every table are large crystals vases with hydrangeas tumbling from them. The Bond theme is evident throughout the room. The waitresses are in rotation around the hall handing out cocktails to the guests whilst wearing cocktail dresses.

  The Bond movie songs are playing through-out and the party is filled with family and friends all laughing and playing on the casino tables and games that have been set up in the hall. There is balloons on each table with photographs of Jack at different ages inside them. No expense has be spared, and the effort put into the party is breath-taking. Considering his favourite movie is Casino Royale, the event organiser got the party pretty close to perfect.

  “This is so amazing; every detail is perfect!” I say as I admire the party.

  “Yeah they made a good job didn’t they babe, what is the Martini like?” Nathan asks.

  “Honestly? I don’t get the hype” I grimace.

  “Tastes like shit doesn’t it?” Nathan laughs.

  “Oh, you arsehole! you knew it was horrible and let me drink it anyway?” I playfully punch him in the arm.

  “How happy does our kid look though? I’m so glad he’s enjoying this, I never in a million years thought the whole family would be here like this, actually enjoying each-others company.” Nathan says as he watches Jack laughing with his friends across the room.

  “Yes, so happy” I agree with Nathan, but not about Jack’s Happiness. I look at Nathan and I am completely consumed by my feelings for him, this wonderful man is the sole reason for my own happiness. I never thought I would find my soul mate, especially not at eighteen, but I did. If only he knew that my entire world revolves around him and I could never live without him.

  Chapter Fifty-Two – Nathan

  It’s eight minutes to midnight, everyone in the party has now migrated outside on the quiet street to bring in the new year. People are laughing and joking and talking amongst themselves.

  Ellie is shivering against me; So, I wrap suit jacket around her shoulders and cuddle her into me, kissing her forehead. She reaches up and places a small kiss on the side of my neck.

  Jack and Jessica are standing in the centre of the quiet road talking and giggling, he genuinely looks so happy and it warms my insides.

  I tilt my head down and kiss Ellie, slowly deepening our kiss, before I pull away to look into her grey/blue eyes.

  “I’m Like a kite and you are the line. Before I met you, I don’t know what I was doing with my life, it’s like I was just floating, wild and lost. You keep me grounded and stable. I love you so much” I tell her.

  “I love you too, Nathan” Ellie replies, smiling her perfect smile.

  I hear it before I see it. The deafening screech of car tyres at a high speed. A black Range Rover is practically flying down the road driving at the speed of light. It is charging at speed straight towards Jack and Jessica. I instinctively grab Ellie’s both arms and shove her onto the steps of the hotel, she stumbles as she tries to regain her balance. Before my brain catches up with my body, I am running as fast as I can towards Jack, to shove him out of the way of the car heading directly for him.

  I can hear Ellie screaming “NATHAN!” amongst the echoes of other cries and screeches. I am almost off the kerb when an iron-like grip seizes my arm and drags me backwards, I am fighting with everything I have but I can’t release myself from the grip.

  Everything happens so quickly. The Black Range Rover smashes into Jack seconds after he throws Jessica across the road out of harm’s way. There is the sounds of glass smashing, horrified cries, tyres screeching, the Range Rover speeds away. I turn and prise the unknown hand of whoever has me by the arm, releasing their grip. I run to my little brother, falling to my knees and pulling him into my arms.

  Oh, please god, not again. Please don’t do this to me again! Jack!

  There is so much blood, glass clings to his face, he isn’t moving, I can’t even feel him breathing against me. I hear a whaling noise and it takes me a few seconds to realise, the noise is coming from me.

  A hot rage, like my blood has turned into malting lava, takes over my body. Another car swerves into the street and comes to an abrupt stop a few feet away, the headlights flash twice. I am running. I climb into the car and its speeds off. A number of voices screaming “NATHAN, NO! DON’T! are the last things I hear.

  To Be Continued.