No Easy Choice

by Kathryn Shay

  “Compliments of my crew at work.” In addition to the one- piece suit, they’d also given her toddler shorts and a top, all with the firefighter insignia, and a hooded blue towel, again with the Maltese Cross emblazoned on the back.

  As he made a fuss over the carriage, Baby Bridget focused on him and so did her mother. Man, he was handsome, with dark hair and deep green eyes. When he stood, he held out his hand. “Nice to meet you.”

  She shook it. “So, are you a regular, too?”

  “Yeah. My wife and I have crazy schedules. She works, I stay home. I work, she stays home.”

  “Ah. My husband and I are thinking of taking the opposite shifts so one of us can be with Bridget when I do go back.”

  “That’s about what we do.”

  “Does it work?”

  “Yeah, most of the time. But I miss being with Lily. That’s what you sacrifice.”

  “Huh.” She didn’t want to sacrifice her marriage, for God’s sake. Colin had been her lifeline.

  “Dad-dy.” Brent turned around. “Come here.” Charlotte was lying in the grass in front of the slide.

  “Uh-oh.” He hustled over to his daughter.

  “He seems nice,” she said to the other women.

  “He is. He’s been coming off-and-on for years.”

  She watched him. “He looks familiar.”

  “He’s a famous author.” Barb made the comment with pride.

  Annie didn’t have time to read anything but baby books.

  “A thriller writer?” She used to like those stories.

  “No. He’s B.J. Winslow.”

  “Of The Daddy Chronicles?”

  “One in the same.”

  “I’m reading his first book now. About his life the very first year after having kids. It’s hilarious and very relatable.”

  “Who is?”

  She stared up at him. “You. They told me who you are. I’m reading your first book.”

  “Good to hear.”

  “Some time, you can tell me how this all happened to you. I’m sure the others know.”

  “I will.”

  “Now that’s a cute story.” This from Barbara. “Oops, Kevin’s crying again. That child needs to develop a thicker skin. Any ideas how to do that, Mr. Baby Man?”

  “Sure, throw him into a den of wolves.”

  They all laughed.

  It was a pleasant morning. They indulged in snacks and coffee. And time flew. Annie had come sporadically several times before but forgot what having adult company did for her state of mind. At 11:30, the group broke up.

  Annie thought about Brent on the way home, fascinated by his career and his family life. Once inside, she found a note from Colin, saying that he went to the garage.

  Of course he did.

  She fed Bridget, thankful she didn’t have to wind the nursing down for two more months. When her angel fell asleep, Annie put her in the port-a-crib in the corner and picked up the copy of The Daddy Chronicles from the end table. She turned to the back. And there he was, in full living color. From the photo, his green eyes sparkled like gemstones. His face was clean-shaven, not like today at the park, where he had some scruff. His shoulders…

  “Who’s that?” came from behind her. She hadn’t heard Colin enter by the side door, as the couch faced the front of the house.

  “The author of this book I’m reading.”

  “Ah.” He crossed to the kitchen open to the living space, as one of their renovations over the years had been to knock out the wall between the rooms. He poured coffee and before he sat, he leaned over and kissed her. “I’m sorry about last night.”

  “Me, too.”

  “You wanted to stay?”

  She had to be honest. Stuffing this would cause problems between them. “I said I did, Colin.”

  “I’m sorry that I didn’t let you. I had a shitty time after you left.”

  She shook her head to clear it. “Are you saying I made you feel guilty?”

  “No. Just that I did.”

  “This is so hard, honey. I knew it would be when I extended my leave, but I didn’t expect to be literally confined at home for ten days.”

  “And I’m not here enough to help.”

  “I tried telling you that, even earlier in my leave. You’re missing so much, and working at the shop every free minute you have is hard for me.”

  “Somebody has to support us.”

  That stung. “My maternity leave covered three months, then I took the last one as vacation time.”

  “I’m worried about these upcoming two months when you don’t make anything.”

  “Colin, you’ve been working overtime at the garage since the baby came. We have money.”

  “I need to be sure we have enough.”

  “We started saving when we first got married.”

  “I will not dip into our 401K.”

  “Like I said before, we have other bank accounts.” She knew she was beginning an old argument, but she had to try. “Or we could put some things on credit cards, or a line of credit, which I also suggested before. You don’t have to be gone all the time. I don’t resent you being a firefighter, even the overtime there, but working at your parents’ garage is another thing.”

  “It’s what I need to do.”

  “Don’t I get a say in this?”

  “Not that.”

  “Don’t you see what’s happening? Bridget spends little time with you. You missed her first smile. When she started to babble.”

  “Hell, Annie, I stayed home for two weeks.”

  “And I loved that. But you’ve been MIA for three months after.”

  “I think I do my part.”

  She was losing the fight again. And she loved this man to pieces. But his absence was hurting them both.

  The modern grandfather clock in the corner ticked loudly. He sighed. Finally, he said, “Okay, I see your point. I had to go in for a special appointment on this guy’s sports car that Pa set up for me. But I told him I couldn’t work the rest of the day.”

  “You did?”

  “I have to work there some, Annie.”

  “I know. All I’m asking is for it to be less.”

  “I’ll figure something out with Pa and see if I can cut down on my hours so I can be here for you. And I’ll check the finances again. See where we can cut back more.”

  She sighed. “All right. I guess that’s all I can ask.”

  He leaned over and kissed her, a tender one, like they always had after they argued. She sighed with it. “Why don’t you go take a bath? I’ll stay with her.”

  Annie stood. “I don’t think so. Our bedroom is right down the hall. We can hear her from there.”

  He gave her that boyish grin she’d fell in love with at fifteen. “The bedroom, huh?”

  “Yep, and we’d better hurry. The kid could wake up any time.”

  He bolted to his feet, scooped her up into a carry and headed for the bedroom.

  * * *

  Colin eased off her sundress. She’d gotten tanned this summer and he kissed the skin of her shoulder. The underwear came next. He sighed when she was naked. “You’re so beautiful.”

  She laid on the bed and studied him while he undressed, then joined her. Her intense gaze made him hard in seconds. He sat back against the headboard and drew her over his legs. Locking their gazes, he caressed her breasts, still full and heavy. She closed her eyes and moaned. He suckled. She moaned some more. He loved those sounds.

  Then she slid back, straddled his shins, and bent her head. Colin practically bolted off the bed when she took him in her mouth. Sucked. Licked. The sounds of their lovemaking echoed around the small room, making him more aroused. He let her ministrations go on for as long as he could.

  Annie knew when he gripped the sheets that he was ready too. She sat up and knelt near his groin. She lifted herself up and slid down onto him. He was rock solid and heavy inside her.

  “I missed this,” he grunted out.

>   It had been a while.

  “Me, too.” She raised up again, and he grasped her hips. Held her still for a few seconds. He sucked in a breath, then slid her back down. She raised up again. And again. Soon, her mind got fuzzy and her womb clenched. Her release burst upon her like lightning striking and she lost herself in total and complete pleasure.

  When she came to, she realized he was still hard. “Colin?”

  “One more time for you.”

  And he began to thrust.

  Chapter 2

  Not long after Colin left for his night tour, the front bell rang. Holding Bridget in the crook of her arm, Annie opened the door.

  “Hey, girlfriend.” JJ stood on her stoop with Lynne.

  “Hey, you two. Come on in.” Once they stepped inside, she added, “How nice of you to visit me.”

  “We aren’t.” JJ was still smiling.

  “What do you mean?”

  “I’m kidnapping you to play basketball in my league tonight.”

  “And I’m going to stay with Bridget,” Lynne announced. “I haven’t helped out enough these few months, but I’m planning to make up for it.”

  Annie’s eyes widened. “I’d love to go.” She took a bead on them. “Trish told you about last night.”

  “She did.” JJ was no-nonsense. “So what? How we got here doesn’t matter. Go in and change. We’re gonna star together on the court like we did in the academy pickup games.”

  “Lynne, you sure?”

  “Absolutely. It’s no hardship spending time with that little bundle of joy. Now give her to me and go.”

  Annie handed Bridget off to Lynne and hurried to the bedroom. Annie was thrilled at their appearance. And she’d seize this opportunity.

  They left Lynne rocking Bridget. JJ drove them to the academy gym. Once inside, they found the other firefighters warming up. Loud smacks of the balls on the wooden floor were familiar. So was the faint hint of sweat in the air.

  “Huh.” JJ pointed to one of the blue-colored shirts. “That’s my team. We’re down a person.”

  “I’m glad I came, then. Glad, anyway.” She squeezed JJ’s arm. “Thanks for doing this for me.”

  “Don’t go all mushy on me, kiddo.” She shrugged out of her light summer sweat pants, and headed to the court.

  Annie followed suit.

  “Hey, O’Shea, glad to have you here.” A lieutenant on the Rescue Squad called. He grabbed a jersey and tossed it to her.

  Another member of JJ’s team yelled hello.

  “This is your squad, JJ. Think I can keep up?”

  JJ snorted and picked up a ball. Bulleted it to Annie, who grabbed it, bounced it on the floor. She turned toward the basket. Took a shot. Damn, it was way off.

  “No worries. You might be rusty. Here, I’ll rebound you. We’ve got five more minutes of warm up.”

  Annie dribbled around the key to get her bearings, then went in for a layup. The ball circled the rim then dipped into the net. She raised her fist in the air. “That’s more like it!”

  “See, I knew you’d rise to the occasion.”

  The shrill burst of a whistle ended warmups.

  “Time to play. I’m point guard.”

  “Of course you are, girl.” The most important position in the game belonged to her friend.

  “You can be a guard. You’re taller than some of the others.”

  Annie huddled with the others. It was uplifting to be part of a team. To be valued by the team. She thanked her lucky stars for the two of the Sisters of Fire who’d come to help her out tonight.

  * * *

  “Hey, Colin,” His lieutenant, Ben Benedeski called out to him from his office. “Can you come in here for a minute?”

  “Sure.” Colin was riding high. He’d made the right decision for his family today, and he and Annie had great sex before he went to this night tour. It was so good to be close to her, physically and emotionally.

  “Have fun last night?”

  “Yeah, sure. Close the door.”

  “Am I in trouble?” he asked after he followed orders and sat.

  “Did you do something wrong?”

  Not at work. “I don’t think so.” He frowned deeply. “Um, really, I can’t think of anything.”

  “That’s because you didn’t. In fact, you pretty much do everything right.”

  “What’s up, then?”

  Ben smiled. “Headquarters is opening a fire house they closed down about five years ago. Apparently the CCFD’s budget is on solid ground now. This is all on the downlow, now, but they’re in the planning stages.”

  “You wanna get rid of me, Cap?” He was only half-joking. He hoped Ben liked having him on board.

  “I’d hate like hell to lose you, but if I was in your shoes, I’d be pissed if my lieutenant kept me back. All the officers were asked to provide the records of our best guy, and I picked you.”

  He warmed inside. Apart from Annie and the baby, being a firefighter was his life.

  “You can’t be modest if you want this.”

  “About going to another house?”

  “No, kid. A lieutenant’s position. There’ll be a captain in the house, but on a different shift. If you’re picked, you’d be in charge of a group. It’ll only be four people on one truck when it opens, but that might grow into a bigger station.” Some houses had two trucks, or even three with the Med rig.

  “But I’m not a lieutenant. Besides, isn’t there a list of seniority for officers?”

  “Believe it or not, we don’t have spare lieutenants on board. We have to train one for this. The house won’t open for a few months. It can be you.”

  “Why didn’t Julie Jensen get the position?” JJ was a friend of Annie’s and had qualified a few months ago.

  “They’d already decided to fast-track her to captain.”

  “Don’t you have to go through the application process and eligibility check?”

  “You’re eligible, I checked. Our department chooses officers mostly based on their service records whether there’s a list or not. You do have to take the lieutenant’s exam in six weeks.”

  “Can I get ready that fast?”

  “I dunno.” Ben arched a brow. “Can you?”

  “Oh, I get it. Yeah, I can. Of course, I can.”

  “You wanna talk to Annie about this?”

  She’d say no. He should say no. They had enough on their plates and preparing for the physical and written part of the exam would take even more time away from her and the baby. But he couldn’t bypass the opportunity to be the boss of a group before he was thirty. “No, need. Annie supports my career.”

  “And the significant increase in pay will help while you’re on only one salary.”

  “Yeah.” He pictured Annie over him, professing her love while he professed not to let her down. “You know what though, Cap. I should talk to her first.”

  “I wasn’t gonna say anything, but I think you should, too. I learned a long time ago that keeping things from your wife hurts your marriage.”

  “I want this, Ben. I’ll have my decision tomorrow night.”

  “Good luck, son.”

  When Colin left the office, he felt a sense of fulfillment. Things had always come easy for him—high school football, finishing a two-year college on firefighting with accolades, and joining the department with Annie. But, man. This was great.

  A blast from the P.A. brought him back to reality. “Fire on Cameron Street. Apartment building in a four-story house. Engine 1 and 2, Trucks 1 and 2, Med 1, Rescue 1 go.”

  Jogging to the bay, Colin yanked on his turnout pants and boots, grabbed his coat off a hook and picked up his air-pack, all of which were set up in the garage. The muggy August night hit them in the face when the bay opened. The engine of the rig roared to life and the smell of fuel stung his nose. He hopped onto the truck, took his place in the backseat. The Cap road shotgun. Banks drove. They arrived at the apartments in four minutes.

  Battalion Chief L
andry was at Incident Command, the place where the whole operation was run. Their group all followed Ben over to the jeep. “What do you need?” Ben asked.

  His tablet sat on the hood. “Engine 1 and Truck 2 are gettin’ control of the first two floors. Rescue will work their way through. Three of you from Truck 1 follow Engine 2 inside and go to the fourth floor. The other two of your team put up a ladder to the balcony. We got a clinger holding on for dear life to the railing. Don’t spook him. We’re afraid he’ll jump. We’ll wait to raise the ladder until we get your signal.” Colin noticed smoke billowing from some of the top windows.

  After donning their facemasks, Colin, Benedeski and Callahan followed the hose of Engine 2 upstairs while Mac and Banks went back to the truck. Colin began to sweat not long after he entered the building and climbed up a steep, dark stairway. Ahead of them, Engine 2 reached the fourth floor, which consisted of one big apartment. They sprayed the wet stuff on the fire, dousing the main room in minutes. Still, it was pitch black in here. Colin hated working blind. Into the radio, Ben said, “Flashlights, everybody. Callahan, search for other tenants. O’Shea, you’re with me. There’s some light on the other side. Must be the balcony door where the guy went out.”

  Bracing hands on a wall, they trudged forward, stepping over timbers and other smoldering debris. Ben went first to the open doorway. “Hey, there. We’re here to take you out, sir.”

  Colin heard, “No. I’m stayin’ put.”

  “You can’t.” Ben held out his hand. “Come on, buddy, I’ll get you to safety.”

  “No.”

  Callahan joined them when he heard the fuss.

  Ben took a step out—and holy cow, a lawn chair came hurling toward him. “Fucking shit!” Ben got hit front-on and stumbled back inside.

  Colin and Callahan caught him before he fell. But Ben could barely stand.

  “O’Shea, you get the guy off the balcony,” Callahan ordered. “I’ll take Ben out.”

  Colin watched them leave in case Callahan needed help, then turned back to the door. He took a step forward, gingerly checking for flying objects. When none came, he walked onto the balcony. It was empty of furniture.