Baked with Love

by Peggy Jaeger

  And as a man now of the world, he’d felt it was his duty to protect someone he regarded as a little sister. I couldn’t be mad at him, but it did, however, explain certain things about prom night I’d mulled over afterward. Like how Tick, whose real name was John Alan, had his eyes glued to his watch all night long. In an era before cell phones were as common as colds, we’d never known the time without one. Tick had checked his watch from the moment we arrived at the gym and had rechecked it every few minutes thereafter. He’d stayed, as his horrible nickname implied, stuck to my side the entire night. He hadn’t even left me alone when I’d snuck off to the bathroom. He’d followed behind and waited for me outside the door. He’d neither interacted nor spoke to anyone else at our table, including my sister who could make an igneous rock talk back to her if she put her mind to it.

  When the dance ended, a few people stated they were driving up to Eagle Rock to have an after party, drink, spend the night, and watch the sun rise. Tick had grabbed my hand and escorted me to the limo he’d rented. Eileen’s date wanted to go with the throng, but even though she was a rebel in many ways, she never blatantly disobeyed an edict from our father and ditched the after-party idea, hopping into my limo. Her date had gone on with the others.

  Tick walked us both to the door, and after Eileen disappeared inside, I waited to see if he’d kiss me goodnight. He hadn’t, tossing me a quick “Thanks for going with me” over his shoulder while he ran back to the car.

  Monday, and for the rest of high school, he’d look away whenever he saw me coming down the hallways.

  “That poor boy.” I shook my head. “You put the fear of God into him for no reason. He was totally harmless.”

  “Oh, there was plenty of reason, Maureen. Like I said, I remember what it was like being a seventeen-year-old. Raging hormones and sense of entitlement run rampant. Plus…”

  “Plus what? You just wanted to act like a big, badass army ranger in front of a pitiful teenager? Assert your macho manliness? God, Lucas, I can’t believe you. John Alan Jones was never a threat to me or any teenage girl. He was gay. Everyone knew it, but since he wasn’t out yet, we all left it unsaid.”

  He had the grace to look slightly abashed. In a heartbeat, that changed. “I didn’t do it for the reasons you think I did, Maureen.”

  “Why then? Why torture a poor boy and make me feel even more inadequate? More lacking?”

  “What the hell are you talking about?”

  “Tick was the only boy to ask me to prom. Remember the conversation we had yesterday about me being the boring twin? Well, despite what you think, I was. Eileen had guys falling over themselves to take her. I didn’t. Just when it looked like I’d have to either go alone and be mortified at being dateless or stay home, John Allan asked me. Do you have any idea how pathetic and unworthy I felt at seventeen? How I felt”—I flapped my hands in the air—“less than my sister or any of my friends?”

  “Maureen—”

  “No, Lucas, you had no right to say those things to him. I was more safe with John Allan Jones than I’d have been with any other boy in my class. It wasn’t your responsibility to make sure I was. I wasn’t your younger sister or a little girl or anything else you can dream up to justify needing your he-man protection. I’m still not.”

  The silence following my angry tirade was thunderous.

  My chest heaved, banging against my ribcage with every jagged breath I hauled in. The pulse at Lucas’s neck visibly slammed against his skin with the rapid beat of his heart, our gazes locked and holding. I couldn’t decide if he was angry and pissed off because I’d called him out on his overprotective, unnecessary behavior, or mad at himself for what he’d done.

  “No, you’re not,” he whispered, darkly. “You’re certainly not my sister, and you’re not a little girl anymore. If you were, I couldn’t do this.”

  Before I could ask what he meant, he cupped my cheeks in his palms and tilted my head upward. With his hot gaze locked onto mine, I knew he meant to kiss me.

  Part of my brain screamed for him not to, arguing if he did it would change everything between us. I couldn’t allow this, had to fight it.

  The other part commanded I shut the hell up and kiss him back like I’d been wanting to for a lifetime.

  Funny—that voice sounded an awful lot like Nanny’s.

  My pulse drummed in my ears and my vision tunneled in on his mouth right before he touched his lips to mine.

  Lucas’s kiss was everything I’d always fantasized it would be: hard and commanding, yet silky smooth and seductive.

  Any protests the logical part of my brain continued to bellow I simply disregarded. Powerless against the rush of emotions surging through me, I simply gave in and let Lucas take control.

  The pads of his thumbs caressed my jaw as his mouth moved across mine, learning the contours, memorizing the feel. Tiny tingles, like champagne bubbles popping, burst over my mouth. A subtle shift and he tilted my head back. With a gentle swipe of his tongue, he slipped through my lips and mated with mine. Each intimate tug caused a raging river of erotic sensations to flow through me from head to curling toes. My panties grew tight, my lower body swelling against them, begging for relief, clamoring for it.

  I slid my palms up the boulder hardness of his chest to curl around his neck and thread into the coarse, thick pelt of his hair. I stretched up on my toes, barely touching the ground with the tips while I pressed in tight against his body. A body thrumming with desire.

  It was impossible to think. Impossible to move. I’d waited a lifetime to discover this man’s touch, yearned for it when I knew I shouldn’t.

  His hands roamed down to cup my butt, palmed it through my jeans, and molded me even more against him. His chest wasn’t the only thing hard or throbbing.

  The simple notion this man wanted me was overpowering, and I couldn’t prevent the moan of pleasure that broke from within me.

  At the sound, Lucas stilled. The drum of both our hearts beating was audible in the quiet surrounding us.

  Then, with torturous slowness, he moved back from the kiss, deliberately waiting to slide his hands from my backside until I stood surefooted.

  Our gazes locked, held. There was an unfathomable question crossing his eyes.

  His mouth was swollen and wet from kissing me, and when he swiped his tongue across his bottom lip, my eyes went wide. I dragged my fingers across my own lips, still able to taste him.

  I backed away from him, stopping only when my hip hit the counter edge, still staring at him.

  Lucas took a step toward me. “Maure—”

  “Dad?”

  He spun around to face Robert. The boy stood in the doorway, staring at the two of us, a look of bewilderment on his face.

  “You coming, or what? I’ve been waiting, like, forever.”

  “Yeah, son. Yeah.” He shook his head like a dog shucking water. “I was just talking to Maureen about…something.” He turned back to me. Swallowed. “We should go.”

  I summoned up a smile for Robert, hoping it appeared natural.

  “See you tomorrow morning, Bobby-Boy.”

  He tossed me a quizzical eye flick and a nod.

  With one last head bob at me, Lucas placed a hand on his son’s shoulder and walked him out.

  It was as if he’d taken all the air, all the energy in the room, and me, with him.

  When I was finally alone in my kitchen, I let out a slow, deep breath and slid down into one of my chairs, my legs finally giving out.

  I dropped my head down onto the table and closed my eyes.

  Chapter 8

  “I think I’m bigger today than I was yesterday and even the day before,” Colleen said, from her perch on her couch. “Do I look like I am?”

  Cathy threw me a warning glare over our sister’s head, a silent message to hold my tongue.

  While Colleen did look a little larger than when I’d seen her on Wednesday, I wanted to chalk it up to the cavernous dress she was garbed in. It
had no shape at all, something my always fashion-conscious sister didn’t usually wear.

  “It’s because you’re sitting down with your feet up,” I said. “Everyone looks bigger that way.”

  “So I do look bigger?”

  Answering her question was a no-win situation, so I handed her a teacup filled with decaf tea and shook my head. “You’re almost due, Coll. What you look is pregnant and ready to deliver.”

  “You have no idea how ready I am,” she said, squirming. Cathy reached behind her and adjusted the slipping pillow at her back. “I swear this kid is gonna come out walking.”

  “Let’s hope not,” I said. “Although Nanny would probably be delighted because then she could buy shoes for her.”

  One of their cellphones pinged.

  “That’s mine,” Colleen said. “Can you get it for me, Mo? I can’t reach.”

  I glanced at the face. “It’s Slade. Again.”

  “Honestly, the man is supposed to be out enjoying himself,” Cathy said, hands fisted on her hips. “That’s the third time he’s texted in the past hour.”

  “He’s worried I’m gonna go into labor when he’s not around,” Colleen told her, “and he’s afraid I won’t get to the hospital in time.”

  “Doesn’t he trust us to get you there? We’re the ones”—she pointed to me and then at herself—“who’ve been driving these roads since we were teenagers. The both of us know every twist and turn and shortcut this town has to offer. I’d bet money either of us could get you there faster than he could.”

  “Don’t tell him that, or he’ll ask you to start sleeping here so if I go in the middle of the night, you’ll be Janey-on-the-spot.” She read through the text. “They’re at the Love Shack. Slade says to call if he’s needed.”

  “Text him back to enjoy himself and not worry. We’ve got you covered, and nothing’s gonna happen. I want Mac to enjoy himself tonight, have a few beers, and relax. This book tour has been exhausting for him.”

  “At least now he’s off for the next month,” I said. “You two can get married, go on your honeymoon, and relax together.”

  “I can’t wait.”

  My sister got the dreamy, faraway look in her eyes usually accompanied by a sappy grin whenever she thought about her fiancé.

  A heartbeat later, the grin showed up.

  “Uh-oh.” Colleen glanced up from texting when she heard me.

  “There she goes. The girl with the stars in her eyes,” Colleen said with a smile. “Can I tell you how much I love how much you love your man?”

  “I truthfully never thought I could feel like this.” Cathy shook her head and drank some of her tea. “It’s a little…scary.”

  “And all kinds of wonderful, too, right?” Colleen asked.

  “Yeah.”

  I’m not an envious person, not usually, but right then that emotion shifted through me. Both my sisters had what they’d always dreamed of, always wanted. They each had a man who adored them and had changed their lives just to be with them, and the bonus of babies on board made their lives so much sweeter. Why wouldn’t I be a little jealous?

  Colleen’s smile drifted toward me, Cathy’s following.

  “What?” I asked, although from their inquiring gazes I could guess what they both were thinking.

  “I saw Lucas in court yesterday,” Cathy said.

  With a simple shrug, I replied, “Not an unusual occurrence.”

  “He told me you went shopping with him and Robert.”

  Another shrug, different shoulder this time. “Because you asked him to wear a tuxedo, and he wasn’t certain what kind. Colleen’s on a no-travel ban from Slade, you were tied up with work, and time was running out for him to rent one. And speaking of tuxedos—” Cathy pulled back whatever she was going to say. “Where are the old family albums?”

  I explained about Robert and the blue velvet tux. Colleen directed me to one of the hall closets, and I found the large plastic container my mother had stored the albums in.

  “Ooo, let’s go through these,” Cathy said when I dragged it into the living room. “We haven’t looked at pictures in forever.”

  I handed each of them an album and then flipped through a few to find Cathy’s prom photos.

  “Oh, my God. Here’s my high school graduation.” Cathy held the album up, face out, so we could see. “Look at the outfit on Nanny.”

  True to form, our grandmother, who was close to seventy at the time, was decked out in a body-hugging cherry red suit with a skirt ending above her knees and a jacket so tight the indentations from her bra straps were visibly pushing against the fabric.

  “Danny and you look cute,” Colleen said. “I can’t believe a week after this was taken you got married.”

  “Here’s her wedding album,” I said, holding it up.

  “Let me see.”

  I handed it to her, and she started flipping through the pages.

  “We were so stinkin’ young, and I was so stupid,” she said after a few minutes. “It still boggles my mind Mom and Daddy didn’t try to talk me out of getting married at barely eighteen.”

  “You weren’t stupid.” Colleen reached out and rubbed Cathy’s arm. “Young, yes, but you’d known Danny practically since birth. Everyone who knew the two of you knew you were going to get married someday. And we all loved Danny. He was perfect for you.”

  “Not everyone,” I said, flipping through another album. “Eileen didn’t like Dan and never had, even when we were little.”

  “What! Why not?” Cathy asked.

  I put the album down and took another out of the container. “You know Eileen. She was a natural bullshit detector. Inherited the trait from Nanny.”

  “Truth,” Colleen said, then sipped her tea.

  “She told me she didn’t think Danny was the wonderful guy he seemed and he wasn’t being totally truthful, maybe even lying to you about something. She never told me what it was, but she believed it right up until he died.”

  “How come you never told me this?”

  “Why would I? From the outside, you two appeared happy, and you never gave any indication you weren’t. Neither Coll nor I knew anything to the contrary until you confessed what had been going on in your marriage.”

  “Eileen was always a little fey, as Nanny would call it,” Colleen said. “Sensitive to what was going on around her.” She flipped through the album in her hand.

  I nodded.

  “Hey, found your picture,” Colleen said a moment later. “Good gravy, I forgot all about Lucas’s hideous tuxedo.”

  “Let’s see.” Cathy stretched out her hand for the book.

  There were about a half dozen pictures of Cathy and Danny, then a few of Lucas, taken in the same living room we were all currently sprawled in.

  Cathy laughed as she flipped a page and found a photo of Lucas and Eileen and me. He was dressed to attend prom, that dumb tuxedo shining back from the camera flash, while we were in our pajamas. “I remember when this was taken. Eileen dragged you down the staircase screaming she wanted a picture of the three of you. What were you guys, ten?”

  “Nine,” Colleen said.

  Lucas had picked us up and settled us each on a hip. Eileen was smiling like she’d just won the lottery, while I was staring at Lucas.

  “She loved him so much,” Cathy said, a mote of wistfulness in her voice. “Followed him around every time he was here, wanting to sit in his lap, show him some new gymnastics move she’d learned in class.”

  “He was always so patient with her, too,” Colleen said. “With the two of you, really. He never got annoyed about all the oxygen Eileen sucked out of a room whenever she was in one.”

  “Lucas never got annoyed at anything,” I said, staring at the picture. “Still doesn’t.”

  Cathy peered over the album at me, her head at an angle and a question in her eyes.

  “Eileen wasn’t the only twin who thought Lucas hung the moon,” she said, pointedly.

  When I did
n’t respond to her baited statement, she held the album up. “Look at this picture.”

  I did. “Okay. So?”

  “You’re the only one not staring at the camera. All your attention is focused on Lucas, like you can’t take your eyes off him.”

  “In these pictures, too,” Colleen said, flipping through Cathy’s wedding and graduation album. “There isn’t one time you’re not staring at him.”

  I’d never noticed it before, but they were right. We’d had hundreds of pictures taken over the years before camera phones became a thing, and in almost every one where Lucas was present while I was, I was looking at him.

  “And now he looks at you whenever you’re in a room together,” Cathy said with a smug smirk gliding across her mouth.

  I rolled my eyes and took a sip from my teacup.

  “She’s not wrong,” Colleen added.

  I shrugged and flipped through the album in my hands.

  “I find it interesting she isn’t arguing with us on this,” Cathy said to Colleen.

  “Hmm. Makes you wonder why not.”

  “Oh, I know why she isn’t. You do, too. I just wonder if she realizes we know.”

  I tossed the album down onto the cocktail table and stared at both of them. “You know, that crap didn’t work when I was a kid. It certainly isn’t going to now.”

  “What crap? We were simply discussing something.”

  “Save the innocent, wide-eyed look for your husband, Coll. He’s still getting used to you, while I know all your info-gathering tactics.”

  “That’s insulting,” she said, looking anything but offended.

  “It’s the truth.” I turned my attention to my oldest sister. “Now, can we please finish with the menu for your wedding? I have a business to run and need to get back to it, and I’d like this to be finalized before I go.”

  “Tell me one thing first,” she said.

  “Oh, for the love of Mike, what?”

  “Did you have a crush on Lucas when you were a kid?”