“So I read about your clinic online. It sounds… nice. You and your sister working with your father.”
“My mom works there, too, in the office.” Rafe didn’t know if it mattered or not, but he was going for full disclosure.
CeCe rubbed her finger around the rim of her cup, making a tiny squeaking noise. “Family means a lot to you; you’re close to them.”
“Yes.”
“Do you think your family would… like me?” Her voice was mouse quiet.
Rafe scooted closer and put his hands on her arms. “Of course, CeCe. What’s not to like? You’re perfect.”
CeCe’s cheeks filled with color and she dropped her head. “I’m not perfect, Rafe. And as much as I like to deny that being blind is a disability, not everyone sees it that way. You don’t think they’d prefer if you found a normal woman?”
He pushed a lock of hair behind her shoulder and stroked her cheek. “They want me to be happy, CeCe, and you make me happy. Besides, I’m not exactly normal, either.”
“I tried to research the Celestia Divisa,” she said, her mouth stumbling on the foreign term. “I didn’t really find much.”
Rafe nodded. “We’re pretty good at hiding in plain sight. We aren’t all that different from humans.”
“What I read said that you have… special powers? But I didn’t really understand what they are.”
“They’re all different, but they’re not like super hero stuff; they’re more… spiritual, I guess you could say. Some are gifted with love or kindness, some with faith, some with patience. We can impart our gift to humans when they need a little supernatural help.”
“So, what’s your gift?”
Rafe smiled widely. “I thought you’d never ask.” CeCe could feel the excitement radiating from Rafe, and she moved in closer till their knees were touching. Rafe took her cup and set it on the coffee table so he could capture her hands. He stroked her knuckles with his fingers, his own hands jittery with nerves.
“I can heal, CeCe. I could heal you.”
CeCe gasped at the revelation, and she pulled away, yanking her hands from his and standing up.
“Wouldn’t that be incredible, CeCe? You could get your sight back, and you would be normal again.”
His words hit CeCe like shrapnel, sparking pain all over her body. There it was, the sting of rejection. She wasn’t good enough for him like she was; he’d meant to fix her all along.
“I thought you said I was perfect Rafe. I thought you said I made you happy.” Pain twisted her voice.
Rafe jumped up next to her and reached to grab her arms, but she backed away. “You are! You do! But wouldn’t it be so much better if you could see?”
“Better for me, or better for you, Rafe? Because I’m happy being blind. You know that. My blindness isn’t a problem that needs to be fixed, it’s part of who I am. You told me you love me just the way I am, Rafe, but that’s a lie. You’re just like everyone else.” CeCe grabbed for Dexter and took off towards the door, trusting the dog to help her find her way.
Rafe followed close behind. “CeCe, wait! Don’t leave. Let’s talk about this.”
“There’s nothing to talk about, Rafe. If you can’t love me like I am, you don’t deserve me.” CeCe grabbed the door handle and flung it open, marching herself down the hall.
Rafe stood at the door, staring after her, his heart sinking like an anchor with a broken chain, down to the deepest depths, and he clutched at the doorframe, trying to hold himself afloat. How had he managed to screw things up again? She was right — he couldn’t look past her blindness, not when he had the ability to heal her, and he couldn’t understand why she’d deny herself that precious gift.
Rafe tried calling CeCe a few hours later, but she didn’t answer. He wasn’t sure what to say to her, so he didn’t leave a message. It was true, he desperately wanted to heal her so she could enjoy the beauty of the world around her. He still thought he could convince her to let him if he gave her a little time to let the idea sink in. Surely she’d come around eventually.
Rafe tried again the next day and the next, sometimes calling three or four times, but she never picked up.
By the next week, Rafe had sunken to a new low. God had given him another chance to fix his relationship with CeCe, and he’d blown it again. He just didn’t understand what he’d done wrong. He was a Celestia Divisa after all, gifted with special powers to help those in need. When he first met CeCe and felt an immediate attraction to her, it seemed almost too obvious that she was the one he was intended to heal, but she made it clear she didn’t want that.
He figured she just needed a little time to get used to the idea, but eventually she would see the appeal and return to him. He knew the feelings she had for him ran deep; why else would she have come back and forgiven him for deceiving her? But she still wasn’t answering his calls, and Rafe was afraid he’d lost her forever.
It was Saturday night, and instead of going out on a date with a beautiful woman that he loved, Rafe was heading to his parents’ house for pizza and movies. He shook his head at the irony of it. If he was with CeCe he might be doing the same things, but they sounded a whole lot more exciting when she was involved. He loved his family, but his heart longed for the woman he hoped to start his own family with.
He pulled into the guest parking spot in from of his parents’ unit. They had downsized from their sprawling suburban estate several years ago into a small but still luxurious condo. They appreciated not having to care for a large property, and Tammy admitted the tiny kitchen gave her an excuse not to cook much anymore.
Rafe hefted the pizza boxes from his front seat and gave a quick knock on the door to announce his arrival before letting himself in. His mother and sister were in the kitchen, pouring drinks and tossing a simple salad, and his father was lounging in the living room, flipping through the channels on the television.
“I hope you didn’t get the kind with the cheese in the crust; that looks like a heart attack waiting to happen,” Rafal said, glancing up as Rafe dropped the pizza boxes on the table.
“I got you and Elethea a thin crust with all the veggies.” He clapped his dad on the shoulder then went to kiss his mom.
“I got a stuffed crust meat lovers’ for you and me,” he whispered in her ear, grinning.
She reached up and pecked him on the cheek, then pinched the other one, patting his flat stomach. “How come you and I like the same foods, but you have washboard abs and I look like the Doughboy?”
“You look beautiful, Mom. Real women have curves, right?” His mind drifted to thoughts of CeCe and her curves, and his fingers flexed, wishing he could hold her.
His sister propped a skinny arm on her hip and rolled her eyes at him, picking a cucumber slice out of the salad and popping it in her mouth. “I take it you’re free tonight because you haven’t made up with CeCe yet?”
“No, she still won’t take my calls.” Rafe sighed and busied himself with carrying drinks to the table to avoid making eye contact.
They congregated around the table and said a quick prayer before digging in to their dinner, the conversation on hold until they got a few bites in.
Eventually, Rafe broke the silence. “I thought she would be excited at the chance to get her sight back. I mean, she manages just fine being blind, but who wouldn’t want to have their vision restored if they could?”
Rafal pointed the tip of his pizza at Rafe. “Don’t try to understand the female psyche, Son. You’ll just mess things up even worse. You just have to accept their feelings for what they are and do whatever makes them happy.”
Tammy grinned and squeezed her husband’s arm. “Your father’s right, honey. If CeCe doesn’t want to be healed, can you love her even if she’s blind?”
“Of course I can. I love her now.”
“Well, then why do you want to change her?”
Rafe looked at his mother with incredulity, his slice of pizza suspended between his hand and his mouth. “I
’m a Celestia with the gift of healing. I thought that was what I was supposed to do! Are you suggesting I give up on the idea of healing her?”
Tammy shrugged. “If that’s what it takes to keep her, then why not?”
Rafe shook his head. His mother just didn’t understand. She wasn’t a Celestia, after all. “Why would God want me to be with a woman who rejected the gift he gave me?”
“Just because she doesn’t want to be healed doesn’t mean she’s opposed to you healing. Maybe your miracle is meant for someone else.”
“Well, what’s the point of pursuing a relationship with CeCe if I’m just going to fall in love with someone else later — someone who does want my help?”
“Who says you can only work miracles on eligible bachelorettes?” Rafal piped in.
“That’s right — whatever happened with that little girl you and CeCe were helping?” Elethea asked.
Rafe’s heart and face softened at the mention of Emily. He wanted desperately to heal her, but he didn’t know how it could possibly work out. “As Dad said before, how could a single guy with two demanding careers possibly take care of a blind orphan?”
“Well, she wouldn’t be a blind orphan anymore if you took her in,” Tammy said blankly, popping a piece of sausage in her mouth. “And nobody is forcing you to be a workaholic. You set your own priorities, Rafe.”
Rafe dropped his pizza and wiped his forehead with a napkin, shaking his head. “Mother, are you suggesting I should quit my job, adopt Emily, and heal her?”
Tammy’s face broke into a huge smile. “I can help with babysitting.”
Chapter 16
Rafe glanced at the little girl in the backseat of his car, her happy smile thawing his cold, lifeless heart. She was his lifeline, a place for him to channel all his unexpressed love and affection, and also a way for him to keep tabs on CeCe. He always asked Emily about her when he saw her, and she’d tell him about their trips to the playground and McDonald’s, and even about the games they played together when they hung out at the group home.
At first, Emily was disappointed when Rafe and CeCe didn’t come together, but she quickly realized that she got more visits when they came separately, so she quit asking when she’d get to see both of them at the same time.
Today, Rafe had something special planned for her, but he’d kept it a surprise, and Emily had pestered him every two minutes, wanting him to tell her where they were going.
“Is it the playground?” she asked, kicking her little legs up and down in the seat. She was dressed in a yellow tee shirt featuring half a dozen Disney princesses and blue shorts with a ruffle around the hem.
“No, but kids play there.”
“Do you think they’ll want to play with me?” Rafe could hear the worry in her voice. She still struggled to fit in with other children.
“They might be more interested in chewing on you.”
“Ew, gross! Why would they do that?” Emily stuck out her tongue and scrunched up her face.
Rafe chuckled at her. “Goats will chew on anything, even little girls. They like to head-butt, too, so watch out for their horns.”
“Goats?”
“Yeah, baby goats — they’re called kids.”
“Huh. So when Miss Ann says, ‘hey kids,’ she’s really saying, ‘hey baby goats’?” Emily giggled, and her face lit up Rafe’s rearview mirror.
“That’s right. Come on, baby goat, let’s go play with some kids.” Rafe pulled into the parking lot and helped Emily from the backseat, taking her little hand in his. She skipped to the entrance, confident as long as he was next to her.
“So, are we at the zoo, since there’s goats?” Emily asked as Rafe bought tickets and led her into the petting zoo.
“Sort of, but this is a special zoo, perfect for baby goats like you!” Rafe bent down and tweaked her nose, and she giggled.
They walked into the chicken enclosure first, and Rafe told her to kneel down and hold out her hand. He bought a handful of chicken feed and poured a tiny pile in her outstretched hand, directing her where to hold it. A few seconds later, a big, brown hen came bobbing over and pecked a piece of food from Emily’s palm.
She squealed and pulled back her hand, dropping the food. “What was that?”
The hen started pecking at the food Emily had dropped, and Rafe took Emily’s hand and stretched it out till she was touching the chicken. “What do you think it is?”
Emily slowly stroked the distracted chicken who was used to the attention, her fingers ruffling the feathers as she moved her hand back and forth. “Well, I’m pretty sure it’s not a goat,” she said in a deadpan.
Rafe guffawed, slapping his knees and throwing his head back, frightening away the chicken. Emily giggled at his reaction, and the look of happiness on her face sent bolts of pleasure through Rafe.
When their laughter had settled, the chicken dared to return, along with a few others, and Emily cooed as she stroked their backs, careful not to scare them. “I like chickens, they’re nice.”
“They taste pretty good, too. Maybe we should have one for dinner,” Rafe said, and Emily’s face dropped. “Kidding! Kidding! We’ll have goat, instead.”
Emily propped a hand on her hip and gave him a stern look. “We don’t eat goats, silly.”
“That’s right; goats are for petting only. Wanna go check ‘em out?”
Emily nodded, and Rafe led her over to another enclosure. They approached an animal, and Rafe encouraged her to kneel down and pet it. Emily ran her hand gingerly over the smooth, fat belly of a pig, a curious look on her face. Her confusion grew when she got to the ears, and she turned and smirked at Rafe when she felt the snout.
“This isn’t a goat, either; this is a piggy!” She declared, and the pig snorted in agreement.
“You’re very smart for a baby goat,” Rafe teased, ruffling her hair. “You must pay really good attention in school.”
“Do they even have goats at this zoo, Rafe, or are you just pulling my leg?”
“Oh, they have goats all right. The biggest, meanest, scariest goats you’ve ever seen! Are you sure you want to go pet them?”
“Yes! Take me to the goats. I’m not afraid of them.” Emily’s auburn curls bobbed as she talked, throwing her head back confidently.
“All right, little miss Braveheart, let’s go pet some ferocious goats.” Rafe took her hand from her hip and led her to the goat enclosure where Emily carefully examined every inch of the animal before officially declaring that it was indeed a goat.
There were even some baby goats, and Emily seemed fascinated by the pair of them suckling from their mother. “They have a good mommy,” Emily said, a forlorn look on her face. “Do they have a good daddy, too?”
“I don’t think goat dads take care of their babies. I think only the mommies do that.”
“They should. Kids need good daddies.”
Rafe’s heart broke at her comment, and he longed to heal her pain.
“So, did you like the petting zoo, Em?” Rafe asked as he buckled her back into the car. Emily reached out and grabbed him, throwing her arms around his neck.
She nodded into his shoulder then mumbled, “I love you, Rafe.”
Rafe stroked her back and returned the squeeze. “I love you, too, Emily. You’re my favorite girl.”
“I wish you were my daddy.”
Rafe gulped and stared at her innocent face for a moment. “I wish I was, too, princess.”
When they returned to the group home, Rafe said his goodbyes to Emily then pulled Ann aside. “I want to adopt Emily, Ann. How can we make that happen?”
Ann smiled at him knowingly. “I was wondering when you would ask that. You need to talk to her caseworker, Margaret Slabaugh. It’s a long process, so you better get started.”
Rafe called Mrs. Slabaugh that evening and started the ball rolling. Maybe he couldn’t help CeCe, but he could help Emily, and she actually wanted his help. Rafe was determined to do everything he could f
or her.
Chapter 17
Rafe stared at the results of his weekend project with satisfaction, a smile brightening his face as he imagined Emily in her new room. He’d purchased a twin-size bed and a dresser and painted the walls bubble-gum pink. A Disney princess-themed comforter and matching curtains softened the space, and a Barbie dream house sat in the corner.
It would still be months before the adoption was finalized, but Rafe had done all the paperwork, attended the classes, and passed the home study. He was a licensed foster parent now, so Emily could come live with him while they waited for the state to approve the adoption. He’d even cut back on his classes for the next semester and his hours at the clinic so he’d have more time to take care of her.
He hadn’t told Emily yet, because he didn’t know how long the process would take and he didn’t want to get her hopes up too early, but today he was finally ready to reveal the surprise. He couldn’t wait to see her face when he told her she was finally getting a new daddy.
She bounded down the steps and threw herself at him like a kamikaze as he arrived at the group home and stepped out of his car. Rafe quickly reached to grab her, swinging her around and plunking her on his shoulders. “Hi princess! You ready to go?”
“Go where?” she asked, grabbing him by the ears and prodding his sides with her feet like she was a cowgirl and he was the horse.
“It’s a surprise,” Rafe said with a mysterious voice.
“I like your surprises. Are we going to the petting zoo again?”
“Well now, it wouldn’t be much of a surprise if I told you, now would it?” He reached up to tickle her, generating a stream of giggles.
Rafe drove her to his apartment and led her up the stairs. “Are we climbing to the top of a skyscraper?” Emily asked when they reached the top of the third flight.
Date with Destiny Collection: Angel Romance Series: Books 1 - 4 Page 57
