A Soldier's Honor

by Regan Black

  Bethany had thought he’d been asleep when she’d whispered those words against his chest. It had taken every ounce of willpower to hold back his response. He’d wanted to share the moment, to give her those same words back, over and over, until she believed it, accepted it, and him. Until he’d smothered all of those fears she wouldn’t share and they could be a complete family.

  His mother had raised a knowing eyebrow when he’d come down early for coffee, but otherwise nothing was said about the two of them sharing a room. When Bethany had made her way downstairs sometime later, her long hair pulled back from her face, damp and fragrant from a shower, he was swamped with contentment.

  “Tea?” He tipped his head toward the carousel of options next to the machine. Her shy smile as she tried to avoid his gaze left him grinning.

  “Good morning,” she said as she waited for the machine to fill her mug with black tea. “Where is everyone?”

  “Outside on the deck,” he replied.

  “Mom!” Caleb barreled in from outside, swim trunks and T-shirt plastered to his skin, along with a fine layer of sand. “Aunt Gracie is teaching me to surf. Come watch.”

  “On my way,” she said. When he bolted back outside, she turned to Matt. “He’s been surfing before.”

  “Not with Aunt Gracie,” Matt said with a shrug. The kid was happy. He was more startled by her easy acceptance of an Aunt Gracie in Caleb’s life. Was it too soon to hope they were gaining ground as a family?

  He escorted Bethany out to the deck, where they joined his parents, both of whom were engrossed with the action on the beach.

  “He has excellent balance,” Ben was saying, leaning forward in his chair.

  “Better than Grace at the same age,” Patricia noted.

  “Weren’t we in Germany when Grace was that age?” Matt asked, subtly calling out his mom’s favoritism for her grandson.

  “We vacationed in Hawaii that Christmas,” she said, not missing a beat.

  “And there’s no difference at all between the Pacific and Atlantic surf.”

  She pointedly ignored him.

  “I can’t wait to tell Grace Ann her star’s been replaced.”

  Ben patted the chair next to him. “Come on over here, Bethany.”

  Matt wondered what his dad was about, but his mother gave him a “let it go” look. He supposed it was a need-to-know type of conversation. He sipped his coffee, pretending not to listen.

  “Caleb chattered for quite some time last night about Matt’s Camaro,” Ben said. “Have you given any thought to what kind of car you want for him?”

  Getting an idea of where this conversation was headed, Matt wanted to intervene. He should have expected his parents to make grand gestures to compensate for what they saw as lost time. At the very least, he should have mentioned the possibility to Bethany.

  “General, s-sir, Ben,” Bethany stammered. “He has another year or two before he’s ready to drive and care for a car.”

  “On the contrary,” Ben said with a smile. “I think he’s just the right age to appreciate what it takes to keep a car in working order. If you think he has the interest and the time.”

  “What are you suggesting?” Bethany asked, her gaze moving swiftly past Matt and on to where Caleb was sitting on a surfboard out in the water, dialed in to whatever instruction Grace Ann was offering.

  “Caleb didn’t give me the impression that your dad worked on cars,” Ben said.

  “Well, no. They usually go fishing or hiking,” she replied. “Caleb hasn’t had much exposure to basic mechanics.”

  Matt stiffened at the apologetic note in her voice. No one had the right to make her doubt her parenting. He’d only met her parents once. It had been their freshman year at West Point, on the same family weekend when she’d met his parents.

  In his vague recollection, he thought they’d been nice, decent people, full of love and pride for Bethany. She’d always claimed they were supportive of her choices as a mom, a student and a professional.

  “I didn’t want to bring it up until I knew we wouldn’t be stepping on any toes,” his dad was saying. “Yours or your dad’s.” Ben’s enthusiasm was clearly building.

  “What is he up to?” Matt whispered to his mom. She ignored him, pointing to the water, where Caleb was watching rollers push to shore. Matt wasn’t so easily distracted.

  “I’m not sure if you’re stepping on toes or not,” Bethany said. “What do you have in mind, sir?”

  “Ben,” he reminded her. “We’re family now, honey.”

  Bethany nodded, her lips pinched between her teeth and her hands clinging to her mug of tea. This really wasn’t the right time. She’d barely had a chance to wake up.

  “I was thinking we might take Caleb out to find a car this afternoon.”

  “What?” Her mouth dropped open in shock. She leveled an accusing glare at Matt. “What?” she repeated.

  He opened his mouth, to explain he’d had nothing to do with this, but his dad drew her attention. Good. Matt didn’t want all the progress they’d made to get undone because his dad saw a chance to raise another grease monkey.

  “I haven’t mentioned it to Caleb yet,” Ben said. “In case you didn’t approve.”

  “No.” Bethany’s shoulders rolled back. “I do not approve of you buying a fourteen-year-old a car.”

  “To be fair, calling it a car might be overstating it,” Ben said. “I’d like to buy something he and Matt can work on, take their time with.”

  Bethany had opened her mouth to argue and snapped it shut again when the words sunk in. Her lips slowly formed a small circle that dumped Matt’s mind right back to last night and scenes he’d rather not dwell on while sitting next to his mother.

  “How about Dad and I take him out this afternoon and gauge his interest?” Matt suggested. “We won’t push him into anything.”

  “That’s a great plan,” his mother said, chiming in. “That leaves the three of us time for a girls’ day. I’m overdue and I bet you are, as well.”

  Bethany smiled and murmured a gracious agreement and let the ensuing conversation swirl around her. Clearly they’d overwhelmed her. Damn. That would probably backfire on him.

  Matt was sure he was the only one who caught the flicker of sadness in her pretty brown eyes. He wanted to know what she was thinking, though he wouldn’t press her in front of his parents.

  At the sound of a sharp whistle, Matt’s attention snapped to the beach. “Check him out!” He stood up and pointed to the beach, where Caleb came in on a low wave, executing a cut back to ride the wave right into shore as if he’d been born to it.

  His parents and Bethany stood as well, applauding and cheering. Caleb hopped off his board as the wave fell apart on the beach, and he punched a fist into the air and then took a deep bow.

  The kid was fitting right in as a Riley. Matt wished he could feel simple pride about that. Instead, his mind kept drifting back to whatever was haunting the woman he loved. Setting aside his coffee mug, he headed down to the beach, pleased to hear Bethany excusing herself to join him.

  Caleb, surfboard under his arm, came loping up to them. With a flick of his head, he shook the water from his hair and pushed it off his face. Laughing a little. Matt gave him a high five.

  “You did a great job,” Bethany told him.

  “Aunt Gracie’s awesome,” Caleb launched into the key things he’d already learned while the three of them waited for Grace Ann to ride in to the shore near them.

  “Hey, squirt,” Matt said as his sister joined them after a few minutes. He slipped his arm around Bethany’s shoulders and made the introductions.

  Grace Ann’s dark eyebrows twitched just a fraction as she correctly interpreted his possessive gesture. “Pleased to meet you,” she said. “Your son is a quick learner.”

  “I think he comes by
it naturally from the Riley side of the family,” Bethany said.

  “Mom has decided you’re having girl time while Dad and I take Caleb out this afternoon.”

  “Where are we going?” Caleb asked.

  Matt shook his head. “Pop wants it to be a surprise. You’ll find out soon enough.” He wasn’t about to steal his dad’s thunder. “Tell them we’ll be back in a bit.”

  For several minutes, they walked along in silence, not touching. Finally Matt couldn’t take it anymore. “You okay?”

  “Sure,” she said. Her lips twitched with the fib.

  “Is that code for you’re feeling blindsided and don’t want to talk about it?” He caught her hand and swung it a little as they walked on.

  “Sure,” she repeated, laughing a little. She tipped her head back to study the clear sky above. “The idea of a car bugged me, but thinking of it as a project you can share, it makes more sense.”

  “Good.” He tried to wrap his head around what he wanted to say. It was important to state things in a way that she wouldn’t argue with him.

  “Have you heard anything more on the investigation?”

  “Eager to get out of Riley territory?”

  “No.” Her smile was sincere, calm. She pressed up on her toes and kissed him lightly. “It’s peaceful here, which is a nice feeling.”

  Agreeing with her, he kept the lack of any developments to himself, and just let them enjoy these moments, not sure what to expect when this interlude ended. Eventually, they turned back and watched Grace Ann and Caleb bodysurfing.

  “He’s a Riley to the bone,” she said, leaning into his arm. “I’ve always seen you in him, but he moves like Grace Ann.”

  Matt knew what she meant. “You know what I see when I look at him?” He waited until she dragged her gaze away from their delighted son. “I see you. In every school and team picture, I see your fire and grit.”

  He’d never held his son as a baby, never played catch out in the yard or taught him to swing a bat. And with every hour, he discovered how little those missed moments mattered. None of what they hadn’t done lessened his love for Caleb or Bethany.

  They’d reached the house and his mother was calling all of them up for breakfast. He kissed her fast before anyone had a chance to notice.

  “When you’re out today, try to relax and have fun,” he said. “I know it’s not a foreign film, but there will probably be mimosas or margaritas.”

  He stole another kiss. If he could keep her dazzled, he might have a better chance making this permanent. “They like you already,” he promised. His hands on her hips, he urged her up the stairs. “And take notes,” he whispered at her ear, pleased when she shivered.

  “Notes?” She cocked an eyebrow. “On a girl day?”

  “Yes. Then we can compare tonight,” he wiggled his eyebrows, “in bed.”

  It made her laugh, which is exactly the Bethany Trent he wanted his family to see.

  They ate breakfast amid a great deal of happy chatter before the three women dashed off to do their thing. From Matt’s perspective, life didn’t get much better than three generations of Riley men on the hunt for the right project car. Caleb had been a bit wary about the search when they set out, but once Ben, aka Pop, shared a few stories about the potential, he got into it.

  * * *

  Now with the sun going down, Matt stood under the bright lights of his dad’s garage, shaking his head at the little rust bucket his son had chosen as a first car. It was going to take a solid year of weekends to get it in working shape.

  And when it was done, Caleb would be careful with it on the street, making him a more conscientious driver, which was the real point of this endeavor. His parents had handled each of their new-driver children in a similar fashion. Matt smiled to himself, looking forward to every greasy, frustrating hour in store with his son.

  He had so much to be thankful for and yet he couldn’t drag his mind from all he would lose if the persistent predator had his way. There hadn’t been any real trouble for either the men or women this afternoon, and so far nothing new had happened to his siblings, but Alex’s team wasn’t any closer to identifying the opposition that had been working them over. He’d squeezed out a few minutes alone with his dad, talking over various missions and problematic soldiers. He’d passed along another few names, though it would be some time before they knew if the names panned out.

  Matt wanted to insist that Caleb and Bethany stay here with his parents, out of harm’s way. They would happily stock the boat and head out to sea for a few days while Matt flushed out the troublemaker. He could go back to Washington and draw out this vengeful jerk.

  Of course, he already knew Bethany would never go for it.

  The garage door opened and Bethany walked in as if his thoughts summoned her. If only life was so easy. “I came to tell you to stop thinking about it,” she said, planting her hands on her hips.

  “You’re back.” He started to move to her and then stopped, a little dazed. Her hair was voluminous, artless waves cascading all over. Her fingertips were painted with a shell pink. He glanced down, and found a brighter hue on her toes. He nearly scooped her up, intent on taking her to the nearest flat surface. Girl day had been good to her.

  “Stop looking at me that way. I’m serious, Matt.”

  “About what?” he asked, in case they weren’t on the same page.

  She pinned him with a sharp look. “Your mother and Grace Ann were hinting all afternoon about taking a cruise on the boat. If we do that, you’ll stay behind and try something stupid.”

  He was insulted by that. “We’d make a smart plan.”

  She flicked that away. “We’re better off sticking together.”

  “Beth, come on.”

  “No, Matt. A divided front never wins.” She came over and leaned against the workbench with him. “You may have the West Point diploma and ring, but I got you through that first year of Military history.”

  “You’re delusional,” he shot back, laughing now. Ben Riley’s children knew their history, Military and otherwise, backward and forward. “And it’s clearly hereditary.” He lifted his chin toward the sad little car. “Our son thinks that’s a car.”

  “Hmm.” She tilted her head, as if a fresh angle might make it look better. “I could make a similar argument, if you believe I’ll go sailing off and let you handle this alone.”

  He reached for her. The knot in his stomach loosened as she slid her arms around his waist. “You do understand I’m trying to protect both of you.”

  Her mouth curved. “Of course I do. The same way you understand I won’t let you go into this alone. He fired bullets at my son.”

  And him too, Matt thought, keeping it to himself. “Feeling bloodthirsty?”

  “More than a little,” she admitted. Her hands smoothed up and down his back. “I know you’re the real target, that Caleb is a bonus or something, but I won’t let you just handle this for me.” She stepped back.

  He immediately closed the distance again. “Beth, you’ve done everything for me,” he countered. “I respected all of your choices and boundaries. Can’t you give on this one thing?”

  Her lovely eyes went wide and then she laughed, dropping her head to his chest. “Is that how you saw it?”

  “Saw it?” He frowned, tipping up her chin so he could look into her face. “That’s what you did,” he said. “You left West Point and your ideal career plan. You flat-out told me to go have a career and leave you and the baby alone.”

  “I should’ve known you’d see my selfishness as an honorable sacrifice.” She hugged him hard.

  “Bethany Trent, you’ve never been selfish a day in your life.”

  “Self-preserving then,” she said. “Matt, I refused to marry you because I wanted to say yes. Desperately.”

  “That makes no sense.” He’d
loved her, never actually gotten over her. She’d just told him last night she loved him too, though he wasn’t supposed to know that. Starting a career with a young family wasn’t an insurmountable challenge. People did it every day. “You told me a child needed stability.” And in those words, she’d flat-out condemned the way he’d been raised. It had taken a long time for him to get over that.

  “Matt.” She reached up and stroked his jaw, her fingers toying with the scruff since he hadn’t shaved since their arrival. “I’m sorry for hurting you in my effort to...to survive us.”

  “Us?” He felt about as intelligent as a brick wall in this conversation, but she was finally opening up and he was determined to understand what went wrong then so he could fix it now. “Can you spell that out for me? Please?”

  “I loved you more than any of my plans. It scared me, Matt. I would’ve done anything to stay with you. Neither one of us could have grown into who we needed to be under that kind of pressure.”

  He shook his head as if he’d just come up for air after a deep dive. His chest constricted and his heart raced. “You thought it was better going alone as a single mom rather than trying a family with me?” he asked through clenched teeth. It was water under the bridge, nothing to be gained by rehashing it, and still his temper had him by the throat.

  Her gaze lifted to his. “Yes. I was barely twenty, and you?” She stepped back and flung an arm at him. “Well, you were General Riley’s legacy.”

  He blew out a long slow breath. “You were the only person I knew who didn’t hold that against me.”

  “I held it against me,” she said. “I didn’t want you feeling trapped or limited by obligations I thrust on you.” She bit her lip and pushed at her freshly styled hair. “Caleb and I watched your graduation.”

  “What?” She had to be lying. He would have seen her.

  “We were there,” she said. “I asked another friend in your class for tickets. I was so proud of you. The ceremony made me more determined than ever to keep going on my own. When you reached out and proposed again that next week, I wanted to say yes, but—”