by Noelle Adams
“So you’re saying you don’t like me like this?” He gave her a hot smile and an eyebrow twitch he knew would make her laugh.
It did. She leaned over to kiss his shoulder. It was the sweetest thing. “No. I don’t.”
“Liar.”
“I’m not lying.”
“Do you need to be tickled again?”
“Asshole.” When he made a show of straightening up and extending his arms, she relented. “Okay. Fine. I don’t mind it too much, just as long as you keep it in the bedroom. I’m really not into alpha males in regular life.”
He smiled up at the ceiling, hoping she couldn’t feel how fast his heart was racing. “It’s a deal.”
ON SUNDAY, MADELINE drove to Norfolk with Ria and Skye so they could do some shopping. She loved hanging out with her friends and liked to look at stores, but she normally didn’t buy anything when she was with other people.
She didn’t know why, but all her life she’d always just browsed with other people and only bought things when she was alone.
She was in a jittery mood today, however. She kept thinking about Ken. Replaying how good the sex had been yesterday. Visualizing the appreciative look in his eyes. Not just when she was naked but afterward, when they were just teasing and laughing together.
It was a heady feeling and one she wasn’t used to. He’d even texted her this morning to tell her he’d had a really good time yesterday and he was available for another go if she was interested.
Those were his words. Another go. It sounded just like him and made her giggle.
It was especially nice not to have to wonder what the guy was thinking after sex.
So her good mood prompted her uncharacteristic lack of inhibitions at the stores. She bought a designer purse that was way too expensive, a cute dress, and a sexy nightgown that she claimed just to want for no reason. So maybe she’d visualized herself wearing it for Ken, but she didn’t have to admit that... even to herself.
Her friends didn’t question the purchase. Any of her purchases. So maybe they’d believed her when she said she just wanted to feel pretty for herself. Which was absolutely true. For the first time in a really long time, Madeline was starting to feel like herself and not Josh’s girlfriend.
They ate a late lunch afterward before they returned to Azalea, and they ended up at Ria’s house to drink the bottle of pink champagne they’d bought to cap the day.
Ria and her older sister, Belinda, still lived in their parents’ big old farmhouse in Azalea. Ria spent a lot of time now at Jacob’s apartment above one of the downtown storefronts, a block down from Madeline’s place, but she was still officially living at home until they got married.
Madeline was incredibly happy for her friend, who’d been in love with Jacob for a good portion of her life but had thought she’d lost him for good until they’d gotten back together in the spring. But the truth of the matter was that, ever since Ria had gotten together with Jacob, Madeline had seen a lot less of her, so she’d really enjoyed having her and Skye to herself all day today.
She was enjoying a lot of things about today, including lingering flutters from yesterday.
They were lounging in the living room, sipping their wine, when Skye said out of the blue, “Okay. Spill it.”
Madeline blinked. Skye was evidently speaking to her since her eyes were focused on her face. “What?”
“Spill it. What’s going on?”
“What do you mean?” To her annoyance, Madeline was starting to blush.
“You’ve been on some sort of high all day,” Ria said, clearly on the same page as Skye. “And we want to know why.”
“There isn’t any reas—” Madeline cut herself off. She shouldn’t lie to her friends, and there was no reason to do it. “Okay. Fine. There might be a reason, but I’m not sure I’m ready to share yet.”
“Why not?” Skye’s pretty, freckled face had sobered. “Are you ashamed of something?”
“No! No, of course not. I’m not ashamed. I’m just... I don’t know... It feels new and... it’s not something I’d normally do so...”
“Are you having a secret fling with a hot man?” Ria asked.
She’d always been way too clever for her own good. Madeline swallowed. “Maybe.”
“Oh my God! Who is it? Tell us, tell us, tell us!” That was Skye. As dramatic as ever.
“I... I...” Maybe she should just say it. There was nothing wrong with having sex with Ken. He was a good guy, and he was available, and they’d been honest about every step of the way.
“I know he’s not married,” Ria added. “You’d never do that. So what’s so wrong about it that you need to keep it secret?”
“There’s nothing wrong with it. It’s just not the kind of guy I would normally...” She took a shaky breath. “It’s not going to last. It’s just a random thing I’m doing to have fun. And it feels... I’m not sure I’m ready to talk about it.”
Skye made a frustrated sound, but Ria sighed. “Okay. Fine. I think I might understand. I didn’t tell you guys when I slept with Jacob again. I thought it was just a onetime fluke, but it felt private. Because I secretly knew I was feeling a lot more.”
“No!” Madeline explained, her eyes wide and her cheeks burning. “That’s not what’s going on here!”
Her friends didn’t argue, but she wasn’t sure they believed her either. It made her very uncomfortable.
Before she could figure out how to remedy the misunderstanding, Belinda came striding into the house through the front door with a scowl on her face. Belinda was thirty-one—five years older than Ria. She had the same dark hair and dark eyes, although she wasn’t as tall. She wore plain clothes and always pulled her hair back in an unforgiving low ponytail, so she always came across as studious and no-nonsense.
“What’s the matter?” Ria asked, straightening up immediately at her sister’s expression.
“Would you please do something with that man?” Belinda was normally an even-tempered person, so her biting tone was surprising. She made a gesture at the front door.
“What man?” Ria got up to peer out through the front window. “Oh. What is Fitz doing here?”
“He’s being a jerk,” Belinda gritted out. “He claimed that you asked him to come, so you’re going to have to deal with him. I’ve had enough.” She scowled again at the closed front door. “I’ll be in my room until he’s gone.”
Madeline was fascinated by Belinda’s reaction, and she exchanged curious looks with Skye as Ria went to open the door.
“Hey, Fitz,” Ria said, waving him in. “What on earth happened?”
“I apparently got on her last nerve.” Fitz strolled inside in his worn trousers and army jacket, full beard, and generally unkempt appearance. He’d been hanging around Azalea for a few years now, doing odd jobs and not much else. No one knew where he came from or the life history that had led him there, but he was a fixture in town now. A rather eccentric one. “At least that’s what she told me in no uncertain terms.”
“What did you say to her?”
“I just suggested she relax a little and have a little fun.” His vivid blue eyes were intelligent and amused. “She’s always so uptight.”
“You didn’t actually say that she’s uptight, did you?” Madeline asked, choking a little at the blasé shamelessness of the man.
“Course I did. Never seen someone so uptight. Not sure what it would take to loosen her up a little.” He paused, his eyes twinkling at her. “Told her that too.”
“Oh come on, Fitz,” Ria groaned. “You knew perfectly well that would upset her. She already doesn’t like you. Why do you poke at her that way?”
“Well, someone has to. She’s way too used to people doing what she tells them.” He grinned endearingly at Ria. “You wanted me to fix your kitchen cabinet?”
“Yeah. The hinge broke. I’ll show you.”
Ria led the man into the kitchen while Madeline and Skye hid their giggles.
The g
ood thing was that the distraction had successfully concluded the conversation about Madeline and her secret fling.
Hopefully it wouldn’t come up again.
AT SEVEN O’CLOCK THAT evening, Ken was sitting in his recliner with Marlowe on his lap, drinking a beer and restlessly flipping the channels in the hopes of finding something on television that would hold his interest.
He wanted to see Madeline. Or at least talk to her.
But he’d texted her this morning, making it clear he would be happy to get together with her anytime she wanted. He’d left the ball in her court, and he needed to keep it there. Anything more would be pushy, and he was determined not to do that.
Just because he was aching to see her, touch her, kiss her, bury himself in her, didn’t mean she wanted to see him.
They’d had sex yesterday. She probably wouldn’t want a repeat performance for at least a few more days. Maybe not even for a week.
Maybe not ever.
That thought made his heart sink, so he didn’t dwell on it. Marlowe evidently sensed his shift in mood because the dog stretched up high enough to give his chin a sympathetic lick.
He’d gone through all his channels at least three times without finding anything to watch for more than a few seconds when his phone buzzed. He grabbed it, his heart lurching when he saw that the text was from Madeline.
You doing anything?
He pushed Marlowe down enough to tap out a reply. Nothing.
He waited a few seconds after he’d sent the text. When there wasn’t an immediate reply, he couldn’t help but add, You want me to come over?
I wouldn’t say no.
The rush of relief and excitement he felt was almost embarrassing. He was like a teenage boy getting lucky. On my way.
I’m worried about everyone seeing your truck in my visitor spot.
He replied quickly. I’ll walk.
It was maybe a mile to her place. Hardly anything. And the truth was he’d walk ten times that distance if it meant he could see her tonight.
Marlowe wasn’t happy about being deserted for the evening, but Ken could hardly show up for sex with a fifty-pound dog in tow. So he got Marlowe settled for the night, locked up, and started walking toward downtown.
He’d taken a shower earlier in the evening in the hopes of Madeline wanting to see him, and he was wearing jeans and a gray Henley. He would have put something better on, but Madeline would think it was weird if he looked like he’d dressed up for her. This would have to do.
It didn’t take long for him to get to Madeline’s block. It was already dark, and most of the town had shut down. Anna’s was still open, but there was no one on the sidewalk as he strode quickly to the exterior door of her building and went in.
He climbed the stairs and knocked. Madeline answered almost immediately.
When she’d let him in and closed the door, she asked, “Did anyone see you?”
“Nope. Not a soul. I was careful.”
“Thank you.” She slanted him a quick look. “You don’t mind, do you? If we keep this secret?”
“I couldn’t care less about that,” he told her, speaking mostly the truth. “Whatever makes you comfortable is good with me.”
“Good. Thanks.” She gave him another shy, little look. She wore a silky blue bathrobe. It smelled like she’d recently gotten out of the shower. “Did you want something to drink? Or did you just want to...”
She trailed off, and it was enough for Ken. He stepped over and pulled her into a kiss.
It was just as hot and intoxicating as it had been yesterday. The kiss got deep quickly and soon turned into him carrying her over to her dark red couch. They tumbled onto it together, kissing until he’d gotten rid of her clothes.
He didn’t seem to have a lot of control today. He was hard almost immediately. But it didn’t seem to matter. She was just as eager as he was, rocking up into him and making pretty moans as he caressed her. In a matter of minutes, he was buried inside her, and her legs were wrapped high around his waist.
He took her hard and fast and deep until she came with a loud sob, completely genuine, completely uninhibited. Then he came too, even before he wanted to. He simply couldn’t resist the feel of her inner muscles clamping down around him.
They panted together, tangled up on the couch, until he had the ability to extricate himself and take care of the condom. They ended up in her bed, where they did it again, this time going slower, lasting longer.
Every time he made her come, he felt a thrill of awed surprise. He couldn’t believe she responded to him so easily, so authentically. And late in the night, after they’d both dozed off and recovered, he put her on her hands and knees and took her from behind until she was actually screaming.
He was pretty awed about that too.
He wanted to do it again and again, but eventually his body stopped cooperating. He lay in her bed exhausted, stroking her hair as she curled at his side.
It was a long time before he could focus enough to form words. “We’re pretty good together,” was what he said when he could speak.
She made a soft huff. Maybe amusement of the very dry kind. “Yeah.”
She felt thoughtful, serious, intelligent. Even lying naked in bed beside him. This observation made him murmur, “Bet you never thought a good ole boy like me could make you feel that way.”
She shifted her position, as if she were trying to peer at him in the dark. “I never thought anyone could.”
His chest expanded so much he could feel the satisfaction pushing out against his ribs. “Really? You never had sex like that before?”
“No. Never.” She paused. “Have you?”
“No. Honestly, I feel like the regular old me has been changed into some kind of porn star. Didn’t know I could do all that.”
She laughed, which made him feel even better (if that were possible).
They lay for a while, enjoying the aftermath, until Madeline said softly, “No hurry, but when you leave, be sure that no one sees you.”
His heart dropped into his stomach for a moment until he mentally talked it back into its proper place in his chest. He’d known what this was. She’d never been anything but honest about it. He’d understood the limits of their relationship, and he’d jumped right into it anyway.
He had absolutely nothing to complain about here.
“I’m not kicking you out,” she added, as if she’d read something into his silence.
“I know. And I know you want to keep this private. I’ll be careful when I leave. I promise.”
She pressed a little kiss on his chest, just above his nipple. “Thanks, Ken.”
“You’ve got nothing to thank me for. I guarantee I’m getting as much as you are out of this.”
The words were true. He’d had the best sex of his life with her, and he wouldn’t have missed it for the world.
But he had to admit that he didn’t want to leave. He wanted to spend the night with her. He wanted to keep holding her against his side the way he was doing right now.
He wanted to do this—just this—as much as he wanted to make her come.
Which meant he was really in trouble here.
Because he couldn’t let her know. If she knew, she’d never let him take her to bed again.
Five
A MONTH LATER, MADELINE woke up feeling rested and a little bit sore.
She and Ken had had quite a workout last night. He’d been out of town for a few days—taking his daughters on a weekend trip to Williamsburg—and he hadn’t gotten back in town until yesterday evening. He’d shown up at her door at about ten o’clock at night, and they’d been on each other immediately. They hadn’t even taken time to talk.
They’d just been apart for three and a half days, but evidently that was too long for the current state of their libidos.
Even after a month of this no-strings-attached affair with Ken, she still didn’t know what it was about him that got her going this way.
The night was a hot, dark blur. She couldn’t even remember him leaving.
Blinking in the morning light, she turned onto her side and suddenly realized why she couldn’t remember.
He’d never left.
He was still lying beside her in bed, the covers pushed down toward his waist, revealing his broad chest. He was sound asleep, breathing loudly in what was not quite a snore.
She smiled before she experienced a familiar knot of discomfort.
He never spent the night. It was part of their unspoken agreement. Sex when both of them wanted it, as long as they kept it secret and didn’t act like it was a real relationship.
It had been working perfectly for weeks now. They were both having a really good time, and their dynamic had never gotten messy or complicated because neither of them had differing expectations.
Madeline was thrilled by the relationship. She’d never been with a man in such an easy way. It didn’t stress her out or drain her energy or constantly make demands on her. In fact, it made her feel good—about herself and about her life.
She didn’t feel like a girlfriend, and she liked it that way.
She knew it was only easy because they were keeping it simple and detached. No matter how much she liked and appreciated Ken, if they were to start taking each other seriously, the relationship would change.
She didn’t want that to happen, which was why she felt so uncomfortable about his spending the night. That felt relationship-y. Girlfriend-y. It didn’t feel like meaningless rebound sex.
And the flutter of fear in her chest proved that meaningless rebound sex was where they needed to keep this thing.
After checking the time and discovering that it was just after six on a Sunday morning, she pulled the covers up higher (since Ken had been yanking them down in his sleep) and adjusted to get more comfortable. She lay for a few minutes, watching him and thinking about how he might change if he was her boyfriend instead of her secret lover.
Would he expect her to cook dinner and do his laundry the way Josh always had?
Would he grow complacent about sex and stop making a point of bringing her to climax every time?
