Jailmates

by Lesli Richardson

  I mean, I do want to go through with it, but the logistics are…

  Confusing.

  Not physically confusing—emotionally confusing.

  Because it isn’t only the two of us involved in this transaction today. There is another couple to think about.

  See, knowing how much Mohrn wants a baby, and knowing phey’d also never take the initiative to figure out how to accomplish that out of fear of what it might do to me physically or emotionally, I’d had a little talk with Dr. H’looder and the wizards at Maxim Colonies.

  They worked their medical magic and came up with a plan they are reasonably sure will succeed. A plan Mohrn is in full agreement with, because there’s a contract for it.

  Worst-case?

  It doesn’t work.

  That’s it. Well, and disappointment, I’m sure, but nothing physically more serious than that.

  No one will die or anything.

  Might result in some uncomfortable morning-after conversations if it doesn’t work, but that would be between the respective couples.

  And MC isn’t charging us for any of this, either. Potential patents, yo.

  This isn’t completely altruistic on their parts. That they have a couple willing to experiment and see if they can do this means that, if successful, the ole MC’s scientific division will gain valuable research data they can use for further R&D.

  Open up other markets.

  Although, logistically, we need two couples for this process.

  The other couple is already on board with doing this.

  I am the final vote. If I say no, this isn’t going to happen today, then it won’t. Because the other couple isn’t willing to do it if I’m not completely on board with it, even though I told Mohrn phey could participate to help the other couple, if phey wanted to.

  Helping us today, if I say okay, is another Pfahrn—part of a Pfahrn/human couple. Only that Pfahrn, Olarte, isn’t ishblane like Mohrn. But Olarte works on one of the orbital transport stations and came into contact with people from a variety of races and walks of life. In the process, phey fell for a human.

  Phey also don’t have an estate, or a landholding, or even a birthright. Phey come from a low-status family and have little chance of building pheir status on Pfahrn.

  Phey don’t want to stay locked to Pfahrn, and met pheir mate at work. The human, Davies McKellan, has one advantage I didn’t when I agreed to this whole crazy deal—Davies is gay.

  Davies works as a navigator for a private mining contractor and first met Olarte a couple of years ago. They kept bumping into each other, and Davies asked phem out on a date. They kept seeing each other, eventually falling in love.

  Davies popped the question, and they got married. Davies had a little help of his own from MC’s scientists to mate with Olarte the way I had with Mohrn. Eh, in the size department. Because Olarte was older and already through pheir initial hormonal phase, there wasn’t a critical need to sync their DNA.

  The couple isn’t in the room with us right now, but I know they are already here today at the medical complex. They opted to sit out this final consultation, even though Mohrn and I had said they could be there, because they don’t want me to feel any pressure. I’ve met and talked to Olarte and Davies at length, alone and with Mohrn. Both I and phey like the couple.

  No, I don’t know when it finally felt natural to start referring to Pfahrn with the androgynous pronoun. One morning a few weeks after we finally got our act together, I rose early to make breakfast for us before phey left for work and realized I was thinking of Mohrn as phey instead of him.

  What can I say? Love does strange things to a guy.

  Like rewiring my straight brain to fall for a big pink bastard like Mohrn.

  Hey, Mohrn puts up with my cranky, slippery ass. Least I can do is…well, everything. Because honestly?

  I’m happier than I’ve ever been in my freaking life.

  My mom and sister are understandably confused as hell, but we’ve already had them to Pfahrn to meet Mohrn.

  They like phem, and phey likes them.

  Yes, maybe it’s confusing to you, but it’s my life, and that’s all that matters. I can keep everyone straight. Even if I think, technically, I’m no longer straight. At least, maybe I’m straight but nonbinary? Or am I still straight even if I have a nonbinary partner?

  I don’t know. Not that it matters, I guess.

  I’m happy.

  Happier than I can ever remember being at any time in my life.

  It’s satisfying to me to know that Dohrn and Yyallohrn will rot in the same prison facility that once held Mohrn. Those two are now the true outcasts, and Mohrn is a hero and beloved leader of pheir people.

  Back to today’s…conundrum.

  Obviously, I can’t produce an egg, or fertilize one. There are limitations to MC’s scientists’ abilities. You need two Pfahrn to produce a viable, fertilized egg, and there’s no getting around that fact. That’s fairly straightforward.

  But the two Pfahrn in this particular equation can’t simply carry each other’s eggs, all because of birthright laws. I mean, phey can, but it’d mean a nightmare of a legal limbo in terms of determining birthright, status, citizenship—all of that—on the back end of things. That it’s actually faster and easier to work out the biology than it is to petition for an exemption or to change the laws says something about the complexity of Pfahrn politics, contracts, and laws.

  For a legitimate birthright and status for the child of the Pfahrn in question, phey or pheir mate has to carry the egg. If phey carry it—the Pfahrn half of the couples in question—pheir mate has to be the one who put it there, or the one who fertilized it.

  The scientists can tweak things around enough, with nanotech and hormones, to allow a human to carry an egg to full term.

  They think.

  But you still need two Pfahrn to get it there in the first place and fertilize it.

  Do you see where I’m going with this? It means the human half of the Pfahrn couples needs to carry the egg for it to have a legal birthright status.

  Ironically, there is no law that says a different Pfahrn can’t fertilize the egg and help get it there, as long as it’s the Pfahrn in question who put it there in the first place, and it’s the Pfahrn’s partner who’s carrying it.

  I’m sure someone will propose a new law if we’re successful, but for now we’re golden, since ambiguities in Pfahrn law always benefit the disadvantaged one who needs it—meaning us, in this particular case.

  A loophole Mohrn is more than willing to exploit, because hey, loophole. It’s legal, it’s ethical, and it’s going to benefit us.

  Davies is willing and eager to do this. Apparently, Olarte’s really wanted a child and the couple was considering adopting a Pfahrn, even though that meant it would tie phem to a planet phey didn’t want to remain on.

  My issue is, despite knowing it’s for a specific reason, and while yeah, technically it’s sex, it’s not really sexy-sex. It’s not even transactional, like what I did with the Guyardiens. It’s reproduction.

  But it’s still sex with someone besides Mohrn, and that is something I’m having trouble reconciling.

  All four of us have to be involved in this process because the Pfahrn need to bite pheir respective mate—another reason they can’t simply impregnate each other and call it a day—to trigger pheir mating hormones.

  A shiver sweeps through my body as I remember that day in the prison hospital when Mohrn really bit me for the first time. Phey’ve bitten me plenty of times since then, but that one will always top the list for me.

  In a nonmated contract situation, there’s not a problem, because phey don’t complete a true “mating” with each other.

  But in this situation, phey are both mated, and not to each other. Meaning a simple contract can’t and won’t cover our situation. You can have multiple contractual partners, but only one mate. A mate takes precedence when determining birthright and status.

&
nbsp; That means certain laws are in play. Because of Mohrn’s government position and status, phey adhere to the letter of the law as well as the spirit of it when it’s absolute and clear.

  I reach up and lace my fingers through pheirs and squeeze. Already, my biology has slowed a little. The MC scientists have pumped more of Mohrn’s DNA into me, and a little of mine into phem, since I can’t envenomate phem to the same extent phey can me. No matter where I am in our house, I feel pheir presence. If we’re out in the woods or in a crowded shopping district and I lose sight of phem, I can always find phem.

  I feel phem.

  I feel a lot of things I never felt before and might never have been able to if not for Mohrn’s love.

  That’s one of the reasons I’ve given up trying to label what we have beyond love.

  It makes me ashamed of asinine things I thought when I was younger, or stupid jokes I might have made at others’ expense, once upon a time.

  I get it now. Love is love, as the old saying goes. Doesn’t matter what permutation it comes in.

  This started as a job, a simple contract.

  Mohrn became my world, my everything, and I’m glad phey gave me a chance to prove to phem how much I love phem.

  “How, exactly, is this going to work?” I ask. “I mean, I don’t have to be facing the donor, do I?”

  Because I don’t think I can handle that.

  “Our medical engineers came up with a frame so everyone’s as comfortable as possible and it’ll hold the recipient still until implantation and fertilization completes,” Dr. H’looder says.

  “Humans are slippery,” Mohrn observes. “Especially when wet.” While I snort a little, I squeeze pheir hand to quiet phem.

  That’s something else Mohrn has developed during our relationship—a sense of humor.

  H’looder continues. “The recipient will face their partner, with their back to the donor. The donor’s partner will be right there, facing the donor, for the envenomation.”

  I shiver again. Yeah, I’m a slut for my mate. Why deny it?

  Honestly? If more humans knew how damned good it felt, they’d be lusting after Pfahrn in droves.

  “But we don’t even know if it’ll work?” I ask, a little surprised to realize how much that would disappoint me.

  “We know it’s possible to implant an egg,” H’looder says. “We don’t know if a fertilization will work, or if it’ll be viable and remain attached until the full term ends. We’re hoping we’ve taken enough into consideration for the bionanotech to make adjustments as needed. We’ll want you to stay inpatient for at least a week, perhaps two, or even longer, so we can closely observe you. We’ll need to carefully monitor you on a daily basis once you return home. You’ll need to take it easy, lots of rest. You might need to give yourself injections.”

  Yech. “If it doesn’t take?” I ask.

  “We’re willing to try as many times as you are, or until our scientists tell us that, ethically, we should stop because it won’t be successful.”

  I know I am stalling at this point, but I still ask it. “Why haven’t any Pfahrn attempted this before?”

  He shrugs. “Finances, lack of data, lack of facilities. It’s not unknown for Pfahrn to take a non-Pfahrn mate, but frequently phey’re not worried about reproduction, or a birthright, or it’s after phey already have designated heirs who’ve reached majority, or after phey’ve separated from pheir first mate by divorce or, phey’re widowed. From what we’ve been able to discover through our research, there have been a couple of unsuccessful attempts at achieving this. However, they didn’t have the resources of the Maxim Colonies.”

  “Not everyone does.” I look into Mohrn’s eyes. “Can we have a few minutes alone?” I ask the doctor.

  “Of course. I’ll return in a few minutes.”

  Once we are alone, I study pheir face. “This won’t piss you off? Seeing someone else…doing me?”

  Mohrn reaches up and strokes the back of pheir fingers long my jaw. “No more than it will bother me reversing places with Olarte.”

  “You’re still jealous over the Guyardiens,” I point out.

  Darkness flashes through pheir eyes, gone almost before it was there. Pheir expression softens. “I understand why you did it. And it was not against our contract. It was not…personal. You did it to protect me. You did not lie to me.”

  “Yeah, but you’re a territorial thing. Not that I’m complaining. I like that about you. I don’t want to fuck up what we have.”

  “We have a contract for this. If you were to lie to me and cheat on me, yes, that would destroy me. This is not cheating, this is not lying. As we do this, I shall look into your eyes and wonder if our child will look anything like you. Because I hope phey have your beautiful eyes.”

  Aww. Shit. The big pink bastard is going to make me cry, I just know phey are.

  Over the past year that we’ve been in this phase of our relationship, Mohrn and I have grown even closer. Phey trust me, and I trust phem. We’ve learned to let down our barriers with each other, learned what makes the other tick, and breathe, and laugh, and feel.

  Because I now feel things in ways I never did before.

  After the time I spent trying to see the world through pheir eyes, I learned how to honestly see phem through my own.

  Yes, I get the fricking irony there, too.

  Whereas in the beginning I thought Mohrn was an emotionless being, I can now pick up all the subtle physical cues in pheir expression, from the look in pheir eyes to the slightest change in how phey hold pheir lips. Part of that is due to being clued in to pheir emotions from our bond, but part of it is due to me.

  Because I learned how to really pay attention. My first instincts upon seeing Mohrn’s picture in the ad were correct—phey felt forlorn, desperate, and in a fuckton of emotional pain.

  It no longer surprises me how Mohrn was able to draw such breathtaking beauty simply from pheir memory.

  Three weeks ago, phey gave me a drawing as an early anniversary present. It was a memory from our last time together in the prison conjugal facility. Of me sitting there on the edge of the bed and looking out the window while we were talking after we’d made love. When I’d promised phem I would restore pheir honor and birthright.

  Had I thought Mohrn had shut down?

  Perhaps phey had, but only because phey’d felt so overwhelmed and confused and scared for reasons beyond my true ken, at the time. Phey were worried how I would feel if I knew the truth, when the irony was, I knew it, and it only made my love for phem stronger.

  And I couldn’t tell phem any of that for fear of phem trying to stop me from helping phem.

  Mohrn saw every wrinkle around my eyes, every fleck of color in them, every strand of hair and how it laid on my skull. The way the sheet had puddled around my waist as we talked, the shadows and shading.

  Every day since that day in the transport facility, phey’ve shown me, in everything phey do, how much I am loved in pheir heart and am the center of pheir life.

  And it humbles me.

  For the first time in my life, I receive—and can give—total honesty. Without any fears of meeting ridicule for anything I say or do. Mohrn might appear placid and unmovable to the outside world, but I’ve learned the truth.

  I am the only person who is blessed enough to know the full fury and passion that resides inside pheir skull.

  I have to admit it to phem. “I’m scared,” I softly say.

  Only a slight narrowing of pheir gaze, the human equivalent of a full-on, brow-wrinkling scowl, betrays pheir confusion to the outside world. But I also feel a confused mix of emotions from Mohrn.

  “Of…the procedure?”

  I sigh. “Sort of. I mean, of all of it. Being a parent. Fucking things up.”

  Phey reach up and stroke my cheek again. “I do not wish for you to suffer for this. I will not be upset if we do not proceed.”

  I rest my forehead against pheir chest and close my eyes as phey wrap p
heir arms around me. “Promise you’ll still love me and won’t resent this later?” I ask.

  Mohrn loves to rub pheir face against my hair while phey sniff me. Phey do that now. “I will always love you, Sy,” phey whisper. “And I will never resent you. I could never resent you. You love me enough to do things that scare you. From the very start. Yet you persisted and loved me. How could I ever resent that?”

  Dust. Must be dust in my eyes making them water and making me blink. “Okay,” I finally say. “Let’s do this.”

  “Are you sure?”

  I nod. “Yeah.”

  Phey nuzzle the top of my head again and make that sweet, chuffing little trilling noise that always makes my cock harden. If I wasn’t so damn nervous, I would absolutely be hard right now, too. Ironically, I’m the one who doesn’t need to be able to perform at all today.

  I know I’m the only person who ever hears phem make that sound, and the only person phey’ll ever make that sound over.

  Except…maybe our child. If we can have one.

  I hope we can have one.

  Being a dad was never really something I’d thought about.

  Now?

  Sort of the focus of my world, in the same way that freeing phem and restoring pheir honor and birthright was the focus of my world before.

  “Shall I get the doctor then?” Mohrn asks.

  I close my eyes, not wanting to move. The warmth of Mohrn’s body feels addictive, the way it always does. After spending so many years alone and in the cold depths of space, to have such a willing warmth to hold me whenever I need phem is something else that always humbles me.

  “Yeah,” I say. “Go ahead and tell them I’m in.”

  Still, Mohrn doesn’t move. I suspect if I stayed there, phey would stay there with me, for as long as I need phem to.

  Finally, I look up, into pheir eyes. Eyes that have seen into the center of my soul…and still want me.

  “I’m in,” I add. “I’m just feeling…needy.”

  “I told the legislature that, if we are successful, I will be working from home a lot, because you will probably need me there to care for you. I will arrange the telecom connection.”

  Another wave of emotions hit me. Mohrn is dedicated to pheir job and rarely misses work, and we can damn well afford to hire someone for me, but I know phey won’t. “Thank you.”