Misfit Traveler

by Olivia Marie

  Misfit

  Traveler

  Olivia Marie

  Dedication

  To the ones who have been with Stella from the beginning. Thank you for making Dreamer and Hazel possible.

  To my husband who helped me with all the research needed to go into this series.

  Thank you to Erin Lee for believing in me and guiding me always.

  PROLOGUE

  Sometimes being invisible was a good thing. If nobody knew you existed, they weren’t looking for you. That was me. I was the one nobody looked for because I was the one that was never seen.

  They would catch the glimpse of the woman I was with and sometimes her daughter, but I was the ugly duckling compared to them. Not the blonde hair, blue eyed beauties they were. My plain brown hair and dark brown eyes blended into my complexion and usually my surroundings. I was overlooked more times than not and because of that, I had become an expert at hiding in plain sight and could get away with things others couldn’t because you couldn’t see ghosts.

  When Stella was arrested for killing a kid’s dad in front of him and Dreamer was taken away, I was left on the side of the road. Eleven years old and completely alone, I took what I learned from her, what little she bothered to teach me, and made it on my own. The streets made me tougher than even she had and with the combination of the two, I had figured out my own ways to make it without having anyone.

  While one rotted in the ground and the other in a cell, I was the one out there living a life. I won in the end and I guess in a strange way, I had them to thank for that.

  CHAPTER ONE

  The month to month lease I had helped when it was time to head out. After three months in the same place, I was over it and the town. I had most of my shit packed and was ready to load up my small car in two days. I hadn’t picked out a new spot to land yet, but that was part of the fun of living the life I did. I could go wherever I wanted to and take off when I was ready.

  The smaller towns were nice for fast stops, but the bigger cities were golden for longer. They were so wrapped up in their own lives none of them ever gave me a second look. I could be invisible in plain sight and that was comfortable for me.

  Grabbing my last cigarette from the crushed pack sitting on the cardboard box I used as an end table, I went to the kitchen, turned on the gas burner, and lit it before walking outside. I refused to smoke in the house and have everything smell. There was a small park at the end of the street where the apartments met up with the trailer park. With fall coming and the weather changing, I had been the only one there for the past week. I loved it though. Being alone was better than with fake ass people, and they were all fake.

  I took a deep puff of the cigarette and held it in until my lungs burned. Blowing it out in one fast cloud of smoke, I watched as it faded into the sky and wished I could do the same. Sitting on the ripped swing that hung solo on the long bar, I kicked up my legs and pushed. Getting up momentum, I let the wind whip around me and closed my eyes to make it feel like I was flying.

  “Those things will kill you, ya know?” a deep voice asked coming out of nowhere.

  My eyes flew open and I looked around, not seeing anyone at first. I slowed down and tried to stop the swing, but I had it going fast and it wasn’t an instant stop.

  “What?” I asked still looking around for the owner of the mystery voice.

  “I said those things will kill you,” a tall man with long dreadlocks of every color said coming out from around the small tube slide in front of the swings. He had on a black trench coat, black leather pants with chrome spikes running the length of them, and military boots.

  “So will drugs,” I fired back. He laughed at me as he moved closer.

  “Yes, they will. Good thing I don’t take them.” He was standing right in front of me and reached out to put his hands on each side of the metal chains holding the swing to the pole. His hands grazed mine and a sense of anger rushed over me.

  “Sure about that?”

  “Positive. I might do a lot of dumb shit, but that isn’t one of them.”

  “Hmm.”

  “What are you doing out here alone?” he asked.

  “Trying to be alone,” I spat back.

  “You don’t want company?”

  “Not really.”

  “Not sure I believe that. Got another one?” he asked and pointed to my cigarette he just gave me shit for.

  “Last one. Sorry.”

  “Take a walk with me.”

  “I don’t even know who you are,” I said and crossed my arms over my chest as I tried to stand up. He had me blocked and when I pushed into him, he didn’t move and it caused me to fall back onto the seat of the swing.

  “My name is Justin. There, now you know me. Let’s go.”

  “Go where? My boyfriend will be waiting for me,” I lied.

  “Bullshit. I have seen you out here for weeks. I know you are staying at the old motel they turned into apartments and I know you are there alone.”

  “Jesus. Stalker much. I will pass.”

  “Not stalker. I just try to know who my grandma is renting those shit holes out too.”

  “Your grandma? That sweet old lady is related to you?”

  “Yes. She raised me after my parents were killed in a car accident when I was nine.”

  “Well, good thing you had her.”

  “Very good thing. I don’t know what would have happened to me without her. She is my angel.”

  He couldn’t have been for real. He looked like he stepped out of one of those end of days movies and here he sat going on about his grandma. I could usually figure people out fast, but Justin wasn’t one of them.

  “Come on. I need to pick up milk and bread for her and if that is your last cigarette, you will need more of those too. Why not have company for the walk?”

  “Not everyone needs someone to do simple life things.”

  “I don’t believe that. We all need someone.”

  “Not me.”

  “Sorry to hear that. I know you look tough, but I bet if I dug, I would find you were hurt a lot and that is why you are so angry at the world.”

  “Are you a fucking shrink?” I did nothing to hide how annoyed I was with his constant babble and ‘I know the world’ bullshit. I stood again and that time, I had enough momentum behind me to catch him off balance and I was able to stand.

  “No. I am not a shrink, but I pay attention to people. You can learn a lot by watching them and keeping your mouth shut.”

  “Is that something you are even capable of?”

  “Ouch. You are a vicious one. So, are you coming with me or not?”

  “Sure. I guess. But don’t think I won’t slice your throat if you mess with me.”

  “I would have never thought you couldn’t.”

  “Good.”

  “What made you so tough? Who hurt you?”

  “Nobody hurt me. What does that even mean?”

  “You are so angry at everything. I used to be you, so I get it.”

  “I don’t know what you get. Nothing happened to me.”

  “Okay.”

  I waited for him to push it farther, but he didn’t. The rest of the walk there was about how wonderful his grandma was. Not that I didn’t like her, but he was over the top with her.

  He grabbed the few things his grandma needed and a candy bar for himself before we walked up to the cashier.

  “What kind do you smoke?” he asked me after his items were rung up.

  “Regular filtered.”

  “Can I get a pack of those too, please?” he asked the guy who clearly wanted to be anywhere but there working.

  “These work?” he asked and tossed the same pack I just emptied on the counter in front of Justin and
me.

  “Yeah. Perfect,” I said.

  He gave us the total and Justin took out his wallet to pay.

  “I can pay for my own stuff.”

  “I know,” he said and continued to get out the cash he had. “I don’t mind. Besides, you will need what you have to get you wherever it is you are going.”

  “How did you…what?”

  “I told you, I know everything.”

  “Just because I am packed doesn’t mean anything,” I said when we left the store.

  “I have been around your type enough to know that once the first bag is packed, it is guaranteed you will be gone within a week.”

  “Not everyone is the same.”

  “Maybe.”

  He walked me back to my apartment and I couldn’t get inside fast enough. He had zapped me of any energy I thought I had. With the depressing look of fall hanging in the air, and his know-it-all attitude, I was ready for a nap.

  “Thanks,” I said and held up the smokes.

  “You’re welcome. It was nice to meet you, Hazel,” he said.

  “How did you… I never gave you my name.”

  “I saw it on your paperwork.”

  “You should stop doing that. It creeps people out.”

  “Maybe,” he said and turned to walk away. “See you around.”

  “See ya.”

  I closed the door and locked both locks before setting my alarm and laying down. After today, I decided to leave that night instead of waiting. Justin was too nosy for me and I wasn’t comfortable with the endless round of questions he fired off. One day earlier wouldn’t hurt anything. I would pick where I would head to when I got up. If I slept for a few hours, I would be good to drive most of the night. The traffic would be done by then and with the open road to myself, I wouldn’t have to do much thinking.

  I broke my own rule because I would be gone in a few hours and lit another cigarette. I packed the last of my things as I puffed on the one thing that always calmed me down. When I was sure I had it all taken care of and my cigarette was done, I laid down. The alarm would go off at one in the morning. It would take less than twenty minutes to load up what I owned, and I would be out of there.

  My stomach churned and growled with the mix of anticipation and hunger. I realized I hadn’t eaten that day and wouldn’t now until I was at least an hour down the road. It was the packing, loading the car, and the first part of the trip that always had my stomach in knots. I didn’t understand it because the road was where I grew up after losing my father.

  That was the worst day of my life and one that changed me forever.

  CHAPTER TWO

  Thirteen years earlier

  The knock on the door woke me and I rolled over to see nothing but dark. I couldn’t figure out who was pounding on the door, but I knew something was off. I waited to see if my dad would get up and answer it. With as dark as my room was, I had a feeling it was one of his friends that was in trouble and he would be there to fix it in no time.

  When he didn’t get up to answer it after a few minutes, I climbed out of my thin sheets and went to go look. His room was on the way to the door and when I looked in, I didn’t see anything. It was odd to not hear his soft snoring coming from the middle of the room, but I figured he stayed out later with Todd, his new love interest, and wasn’t back yet. Dad never brought dates over unless he knew the guy was good. He never did anything to put me in danger and meeting one of his “friends” was never a quick process for them.

  Knock.

  Knock.

  The pounding became harder and more frequent. Soon, my heart matched the pounding on the other side of the thin door. My hand trembled as I reached for the knob and, with my fingers tangled around it, I froze.

  “Who is it?” I said in my strongest voice, but I wasn’t fooling anyone. They could hear the squeak of the eight-year old voice on the other side.

  “Police. Open up, please,” a deep, gruff voice said from the other side.

  “How do I know if you are?”

  “Are you Hazel Wagner?” he asked.

  “Yes.”

  “Please open the door,” another male voice gently demanded.

  Unlocking the bottom lock, I left the chair hooked and cracked the door a little. There stood two men in full uniforms, one was holding a badge for me to see. It looked real and if someone went through all this trouble to get to me or my dad, they had done a great job.

  “This is Officer Stanley and I am Officer Jacobson. Can we come in please?” the younger of the two asked.

  “I don’t know. My dad isn’t home if that is who you are looking for.” As soon as the words left my lips, I wished I could have taken them back. I wasn’t sure what time it was, but I was sure it was too late for a young girl to be home alone.

  “We know he isn’t, honey. Please let us in so we can talk to you,” the older, thinner looking man said.

  I looked around at our not so clean apartment for any evidence of the party they had the night before. My dad was good about cleaning everything up, but sometimes he missed things and I would have to take care of it. He never did the drugs his friends would sometimes do, but he never stopped them from using them in our house. Seeing only a few empty beer cans—not a crime—I shut the door to undo the chain lock and let them in.

  “Can we sit?” the older one asked and ushered me to the table. “Hazel, we have some bad news for you.”

  My heart sped up and my hands turned to ice. The room spun and his words clustered in my mind making it take a minute to figure out his words. The lump that took up the space in my stomach began to roll around, bouncing off the sides of my turning stomach; I braced for whatever they were going to tell me.

  “Your father, Adam Wagner, was in a car accident about an hour ago. He was on his way here, we assume, by the direction he was heading. He fell asleep from what we can tell, and he crossed the center line hitting another car head on.”

  The pause to look at his partner pissed me off. If he had something to tell me, he needed to hurry up and say it.

  “Hazel, your dad didn’t make it, honey,” the younger cop said.

  I sat there and stared at them. What he told me got to me, but I couldn’t get it to make sense no matter how hard I tried. They were there to lie to me. Someone who was mad at my dad set that up. It had to be the answer. My dad wouldn’t have done anything to put himself in danger to not come home to me; we were all we had. After my mom left when I was only about a year old, it was just the two of us and we were thick as thieves. He gave up everything to raise me and now that I was getting a little older, he was trying to have a piece of a life again, but he never neglected me or did anything that would have put what we had in jeopardy.

  “Hazel? Did you hear me?” he asked.

  “Did Tony put you up to this? He wanted to borrow money last week and Dad refused to give it to him because he was saving it to sign me up for soccer again.”

  “We don’t know who Tony is, honey. I need you to focus though, please. There was a Stella listed as the emergency contact. Do you know how to get a hold of her?”

  I ran Stella through my mind over and over and came up blank. I didn’t remember him talking about a Stella.

  “I don’t know. I don’t think so.”

  “Does he have paperwork somewhere that might have the info on it? We have to find her, or you will have to go into foster care. We would rather not have to do that to you,” the older man said.

  “Maybe. I know where his address book is.”

  “That might help.”

  I went to his room, dug through his nightstand, and pulled out the tattered, dark blue book. I flipped to the S’s and there she was with a heart around her name. The writing was feminine and not his. My guess was, she had written it for him.

  “Here,” I said and handed the book with the page open to her name to the older man. “There isn’t a last name and I don’t know how long ago she wrote that. I haven’t met her, so I don’t
know if he talked to her the last eight years.”

  “We will figure it out. Is there anyone you can stay with for now until we get this straightened out?”

  “My uncle Jason.”

  “Huh. There wasn’t any mention of a relative.”

  “He isn’t really my uncle, but he should be.”

  “Can you call him and have him pick you up? We can’t leave until an adult is here with you,” Officer Stanley said.

  “Yes.”

  Ring.

  Ring.

  Ring.

  Ring.

  I was about to give up when a sleepy “Yeah” bellowed into the phone.

  “Uncle Jason?”

  “Hazel? What time is it?”

  “Late. Can you come here, please?” I begged. I tried to hold back the tears that were threatening to fall. I had to stay strong, it would have been what he wanted.

  “Are you alright?” he asked. I could hear he was awake now and heard him rummaging around his room and figured he was getting dressed.

  “No. There are two officers here and they are trying to tell me Dad is dead,” I blurted out before the sobs became so strong I couldn’t talk.

  “Hang tight, baby girl. I will be there in ten minutes.”

  The slam of the phone echoed in my head as I fell to the floor. Hearing the words was one thing, saying them out loud myself was more than I could stand.

  It felt like forever until he showed up even though I knew it was only minutes since I hung up the phone. Uncle Jason talked to the cops, and when he was done and turned back to me, I knew it wasn’t a joke or a misunderstanding. My dad was really gone, and I would never be with him again.

  CHAPTER THREE

  They tracked down Stella, or she tracked us down. I wasn’t sure and I didn’t care. Without my dad, there wasn’t a place on the planet that would ever feel like home again. Stella had a daughter of her own that was a few years younger than I was and she didn’t seem thrilled to have to take on another child.

  “I loved him so much. I wanted to be with him. That child in the other room should have been ours, and now I have to raise her? The constant reminder that I was good enough to be his friend but not good enough to love like that? I hate him and I don’t know if I can do this,” she said to Amber, Uncle Jason’s girlfriend, through her wails.