Acid Rain

by R. D Rhodes

  My stomach moaned louder than ever. I could feel the acids swishing around. I moved to turn the radio back on but just then, out of the gloom, a white wooden sign appeared ahead, sticking up from the roadsides long grass and pointing us right. NHS Royal Sleepyhillock hospital.

  Mack braked sharply and veered right into the turn-off, into the woods, arrowing the car along the narrow road till we came to a tall open gate and she drove inside the black, half-rusted, iron bars. Behind it, hidden away amongst the fog and cluttered branches I noticed an odd concrete structure of a building- an eight by eight box that looked like a cold war shelter. As we drew up close a monkey face in uniform leaned out from its window, watching us. The face disappeared, and just as Mack was about to drive past, it emerged again as if from nowhere. The man leapt out in front of the car. He approached the driver’s side with long meaningful steps, his black uniform pressed and straightened like a soldiers. He held up a giant palm and glared simultaneously from me to Mrs. Mack. His features became clearer- his dark bushy eyebrows twisted and menacing- he looked like a man not to be messed with.

  “HULLO? CAN I HELP YOU?” he commanded gruffly, his tone suspicious.

  “Yes, hello there.” Mack rolled the window down, “This is Aisha McGillivray. She’s here to check-in?”

  The man scrutinized me for a second. He twitched his flat nose and scratched his head and his face really did have the look of a baffled ape. He went on scratching his head and trying to decide what to do.

  “Wait here!” he said finally.

  As he walked backwards he held out his palm again, keeping his eyes fixed on us until he disappeared back into his cubby hole.

  “What’s his problem?” Mack said. She turned to me and gave another of her well-meaning stoic smiles with her lips.

  “He’s maybe lost his banana.” I said.

  Mack grinned.

  We waited. Through its one lit window we watched for movement. But there wasn’t any. Then there came a series of low grunts, bellowing out from behind the walls.

  “He’s either on the phone in there, or masturbating.” Mack said flatly, in her typical deadpanned humour. But her neck immediately tensed up. She flashed an awkward look at me.

  I pretended I didn’t hear. I watched a crow flutter along the surface of the rising road ahead and disappear off into the trees. I looked at the building then turned my eyes back to the road, and when I raised them again all of a sudden it seemed to get ten times darker.

  The long winter nights were creeping in.

  It was all so quiet…

  Chapter 5

  “There’s nothing stopping us from just going in,” Mack said, “but I’ll wait anyway. I spoke to the head nurse on the phone. She seems really nice!”

  I didn’t reply. The guy returned from the building and without looking at us or saying another word, waved us through dismissively with the back of his hand. I looked out the back window as the car moved on and he swaggered back inside, and I hadn’t seen it before, but running along the back of that building and set against the closed trees, ran a razor barbed-wire fence, at least ten feet high.

  Mack dropped into third gear and climbed the hill at reduced speed. She flicked the lights from half to full beam. The fog ghosted between the trees and sifted out in front of us, seeming to get thicker as we got higher. On both sides the overgrowth of shrubs and bushes kept creeping closer, until their thorns were almost clawing at the windows. Vines were spiraling up around the trees, strangling them in their grip, and below them rhododendrons twisted along the ground. I couldn’t believe how unkempt everything was. If this is what they leave their grounds like, what is it like inside? I wondered.

  A dim orange glow hid in the greyness ahead and as we approached I realised it was a streetlamp, its little head shining pathetically on top of a rustic, concrete body that looked about fifty years old. Its bleak light only added to the weird, silent atmosphere that was pervading the air. We passed by a couple more, then ahead, through a clearing in the trees on the left, I thought I saw it- an old building of grey faded sandstone, two-storeys high with several chimneys poking up through the shingled roof. The road skirted along the building’s front. I looked up at the weeds that choked its gutters and sprawled out over the moss-smothered slates. Most of the chimneys were cracked, and crows had made homes in the funnels. All the windows were boarded up with nailed in cardboard, and below glass shards lay scattered along the tarmac, glinting in the orange lamplight. There were a few windows that had yet to be covered, and beyond each of them deep blackness lay in waiting. I stared into them, wondering what those rooms used to be.

  Mack crawled the car forward at ten miles an hour. She was looking at the state of it too. Then she turned her head and caught my eye, “It gets better,” she said softly. She looked back out, “These are just the out-buildings. Don’t worry.”

  “How long ago were you here?” I asked.

  She faced the windscreen and tightly held the wheel. “Oh, a while ago now, honey. About four or five years ago.”

  “Was it this derelict then?”

  “No, but trust me the main building is a lot better. They just don’t have a use for all this land anymore. Costs too much to maintain. Wait till you’re in there. You’ll like it. Look! It’s not so bad.”

  I peered opposite, at the grounds that those windows looked onto. I couldn’t see much of it through the fog but the grounds there were a lot neater, almost spotless actually, and the grass was all mowed and dotted with tall planted trees. It ran downhill on a series of inclines between level fields, like a Chinese rice plantation. The grass kept running down, I couldn’t see all the way- but just then a patch of fog drifted on and I could see that it was indeed the boundary, and that dense woodland seemed to surround the hospital on all sides. When the fog cleared long enough I gazed amongst the distance of treetops but I couldn’t see another light, road, house or sign of human habitation anywhere.

  The road narrowed again, leading us towards a long wall of hedge. There was a gap in its centre and Mack drove through, and on the other side the huge main building stretched out before us. The size of it took me aback. It stood vast and omniscient at the very top of the hill, like a huge old mansion house, arching high at the roof with decadent gothic turrets and columns of large chimneys that were all silhouetted in the darkness of the deepening night. The out-building we past before was two storeys but this was at least three- four actually- as I counted the rows of bright, orange-lit windows from the bottom up. Those many windows were stretched out on all sides, windows everywhere, and they were all gleaming brightly through the haze. The building’s main block was flanked on both sides by giant protruding separate wings, everything parallel in appearance. It all looked more like a castle fort than a modern medical institution.

  And all this I could see from a distance as Mack drove nearer. She steered past an old brown signpost on our left that held a map of the grounds beneath a series of directions and arrows- Ward 2, 3, 4, and 8-right. Kitchen area-left. Ward 7,9, and 10- left. Main reception. Occupational therapy. Psychiatry.

  The road split two ways- straight, through the grounds towards the distant trees, and right, where Mack went, up the hill towards the hospital. A number of derelict greenhouses stood before the hedge, all smashed to bits. Clusters of brambles rose up through the open roofs and poked out through the sides. A crow hopped along what remained of one of the steel roof structures. My eyes followed it but it was too dark and I soon lost sight as Mack drew up to the large car park. There were very few other cars though. I counted eleven, which seemed odd, given the size of the place. But then again it is nighttime, I thought.

  Mack drove into a space, slowed down, stopped, and killed the engine. I looked straight through the windscreen at the large windows of the first floor, but I couldn’t see any movement, just a long sweeping corridor with no-one in it.

  An eerie silence hung in the air. I expected to hear something- a car starting up, a shout,
the chatter of nurses leaving the hospital- but nothing.

  Mack waited patiently. She had a long look out before her, then faced me again. “You want a few minutes?”

  I nodded.

  “Mind if I smoke?”

  I shook my head. She reached into her cardigan pocket and pulled out a pack and pulled one loose. She rolled down the window, produced a lighter and sparked up.

  I looked at the clock. 8.40.

  I wanted to go back. I wanted to be anywhere but there. I glanced around at the other cars-Fords and Renaults and a beat-up old Astra parked four spaces away, then I peered out the back window. I couldn’t see the greenhouses anymore, or much else, but I made out the row of trees siding the lamp-lit path that ran down the center of the lawn. They stood motionless. There wasn’t a breath of wind. Everything was so quiet.

  I turned back and sat there facing the hospital. Mack was sucking up the fag with deep intakes of breath. I thought about asking for one, but I knew the nausea within me wouldn’t have been able to handle it. My stomach felt like it was full of eels. I tried to settle myself, to tell myself that this was where I needed to be. That I would be fine. But I couldn’t do it. I looked out through the fog at my future, at all those miles of windows. I scanned the rows from the first floor to the second to the third. There was no movement in any of them. Just bright lights, empty rooms and corridors. I wondered which one I would be looking out from.

  “It’ll be okay.” Mack said. “The first few days are always the most nerve-wracking, but wait till you get settled in. You’ll be fine.”

  The way she said it, lilting the last sentence, was obviously forced. She wasn’t usually that insincere, but I think she tried to convince herself, as well as me. I watched her as she stumped out her fag and dropped it out the window, the cigarette being followed out by a fierce billow of smoke. She pulled up the window and I looked at her side-on, and in that profile, she seemed to age ten years. Her eyes were tired and baggy, frustrated, and they betrayed the warm, reassuring smile that she was now trying to give me. Those deep-set eyes lined with wrinkles, eyes that had obviously seen a lot and grown weary with it all. She looked almost as tired as I felt.

  A cold air swept up my spine and made me shiver. “I don’t want to go.” a quiet voice said from within me.

  “C’mon it’ll be fine. Just wait till you get settled in.”

  I got up to move, then stalled a few more minutes. Again, I looked up and down the rows of windows. Hopefully I’ll get straight to bed and sleep this off, I thought. It had been one hell of a day.

  I sighed and reached behind the chair and grabbed my bag from the back seat. I took a deep breath, clicked open the door, and stepped out onto the concrete.

  Chapter 6

  M ack locked the car and we walked together to the blue double-entrance doors. One of them was slightly ajar and Mack stepped in front and pushed it open.

  I waited on the step and glanced back at the car park one more time.

  I drew my breath and stepped inside.

  The blinding light in the corridor stung my eyes, and the custard yellow walls only added to the brightness. I walked slowly along the squeaky marble floor, all the way Mack sticking so close that she kept brushing against my side, but I knew her well enough to know that she was just trying to comfort me, that it wasn’t to prevent me from turning back. It did cross my mind though, but where else could I go? I wondered, as we walked halfway down the hall till we reached a hole in the wall, where behind the glass window a lady sat at a computer- the receptionist’s office.

  She looked up from the monitor.

  “Can I help you?”

  “Yes, thanks,” Mack replied. “I’m here with Aisha McGillivray.”

  The receptionist gawked at me and then turned back to Mack, addressing her as if I wasn’t there, “Someone will be right down. Just take a seat please.”

  I watched her pick up a phone and hold it to her ear while we went into the alcove opposite her window. The cushion-seats were rimmed around a table fully covered in glossy, brightly colored magazines and I edged my way around it and sank my bum into the soft fabric. Mack plumped herself down next to me.

  I tried to stop shaking but it was getting worse. I clenched my fists, then I held my knees, and when that didn’t work I tried some breathing exercises. An arm slid around my back, Mack was still looking at the table while she gently rubbed my shoulder.

  It was almost as quiet inside as it was outdoors, all I could hear was the buzz from the neon lights hanging above our heads. But sitting there I started to feel a bit better. The alcove shape, the rimmed seats and the magazines on the table reminded me of an old hospital I used to go to, a place that for me used to be a home from home. Maybe this will be too, I hoped.

  After a few minutes, Mack slid her arm out and started rummaging about in her handbag. She brought it up onto her knees, raked about some more, then brought out a notebook and pen. I watched to see what she was writing. She ripped out the page and handed it to me.

  “Phone me anytime you want,” she said. “My work and mobile number are there.” She raised her eyebrows and it made her eyes bigger, “Anytime okay?”

  “Thank you.” I said. I folded it up and slid it into my jeans pocket. Then I scanned the table and picked up a National Geographic. I leafed through the pages, just looking at the pictures.

  An eternity seemed to pass. The electric lights went on buzzing away. Through the glass window I could see the receptionist typing busily. I wondered if she was actually doing work or was just scrolling Facebook.

  “Where the hell is she?” Mack muttered under her breath, just loud enough for me to hear. She went back into her handbag and pulled out a packet of humbugs. “You want a sweet?”

  “No, thanks.” I said. I flicked a few more pages of lions and rocks and sheep and coral reefs without really taking anything in, when just then a Clack-Clack-Clacking noise came from far away and got louder, its high pitch bouncing off the walls and reverberating down the corridor into the space where I sat. I looked up from the magazine, and seen a blonde lady in a knee-high black dress emerge from behind the wall and heading straight towards me, a wide, white smile stretched across her face.

  “Hello. Aisha?”

  I stood up and nodded.

  She stopped before the table and offered a manicured hand, the nails coated in deep red polish. She was tall for a woman, though a couple of inches shorter than my five, eleven. Her mascara’d chestnut eyes were sparkling as she looked at me. She looked late twenties or early thirties.

  I put down the magazine and shook her hand. Her grip was soft and hardly there.

  “My name is Hazel Sanders.” she said, in a warm, breathy, sexual voice. There was a little rasp in her throat as she talked, a bit like how an adolescent boy first losing his voice might sound, but it sounded soothing and warm in her thick English accent.

  “I’m the senior nurse in charge, and you’re going to be based in my ward-ward four. Does that sound okay?” She beamed again, showing her bright, Colgate-ad teeth.

  “Okay.” I said.

  “Great!” She pulled her hand away and rested it on her side while she stood upright. Her skin was flawless and foundationed, her cheeks aglow with blusher. She looked radiant as she stood there grinning with little dimples creasing the sides of her mouth.

  “How was your drive?” she asked, glancing from me to Mrs Mack.

  Mack brought her fist to her mouth and coughed. “Yeah, it was good thanks. Very foggy.”

  “Yeah, it’s often like that here. It’s the sea.” Sanders replied.

  I didn’t say anything. I wasn’t good with small talk. Mack was quiet too and nobody knew what to say.

  A few seconds of silence reigned between us all.

  “Well, Aisha?” Sanders chirped. “Will we get going up?”

  I turned to face Mack, but catching me by surprise, she threw her arms around me. She held me there for several moments, and I felt the warmt
h flowing through her frail, little body.

  She pulled back and looked nervously up at me through her glasses.

  “I’ve got to get going now, Aisha.” She said. “If you need anything, just let me know okay?”

  Her face was placid, but she couldn’t hide the worry in her voice and her eyes. I wondered if she cared about everybody she worked with as much as she obviously did for me?

  “Yeah, I will. Thank you.” I said.

  She gave a last lingering look, then rounded the table, keeping her face turned away from me as she patted a right hand on Sanders’s shoulder, “Take good care of her, okay.” she said, her voice cracking.

  “We will.” Sanders smiled.

  I watched her back as she headed down the corridor, until she disappeared through the door.

  Chapter 7

  When the door shut Sanders said, “C’mon then, I’ll show you around.”

  I picked up my bag from the seat and followed after her long, leggy strides down to the other end of the corridor. At the bottom it branched off left and right down long identical stretches, lined with doors on either side. We stood before a large staircase. I looked up to the sign dangling from two metal chains, my mind whirling with all the influx of information -Ward 4,8,12 upstairs. Kitchen, canteen, ward 2, 3 and 7 right. Ward 1 and 5 left. It was like a maze.

  Sanders bounced quickly up the first step and I followed, but my legs were like lead. Each step made me feel like throwing up and the spinning, floral patterns of the Victorian wallpaper didn’t help. I tried to keep up as her long legs flighted up the stairs. Even in her heels she climbed them sprightly. She stepped off on the next floor and went right, motioning me to follow, she hadn’t said a word the whole way. We stood outside a wooden door with thick glass panels, labeled ward 4, and she pulled a set of keys from her pocket and unlocked it.