Marked for Love

by Hannah West

  “Or that stupid case.” Noelle looked pointedly at the case file on her desk. There had been progress with Dahra, but still, there wasn’t enough evidence to either exonorate or convict Samantha. She would have to talk to Derek, pursue those leads, but she needed Riley around for that. Otherwise she would have to face the high profile aspect of the case on her own.

  “You’re doing well with this case,” Riley said. “Now, look at the new one.”

  “When did it come in?” Noelle asked, not opening the folder.

  “Last night. It’s relatively fresh.” Riley looked down at the file. He was obviously waiting.

  “Riley?” Noelle didn’t open the file. Her phone had not gone off. She dreaded asking Sara for dinner - what if Sara didn’t respond to that, either? Had Noelle messed up in some way?

  “Yeah?” Riley leaned back slightly, his expression more serious than it had been. For a middle-aged, greying cop, he had way too much fun.

  “Did you find out about the database?” Noelle asked finally. She didn’t look at him, didn’t think about why she was asking the question. But she did.

  All she could think about were Ivan’s picture, his address - Clark’s picture, the one of him and Sara that she had left at Sara’s apartment. Part of her knew that she would never see that photo again, and she wasn’t entirely unhappy about it. She didn’t want the reminder of Sara’s past, and it had been easy to see that Sara didn’t, either.

  “Not yet,” Riley said after a few moments. “But my friend is looking into it.”

  “Hmm.” Noelle twisted a strand of hair around her finger for a few moments, staring out into the main part of the department, staring through Riley. “Thanks.”

  He studied her for a few moments. Noelle was relieved when he didn’t ask why. She wasn’t ready to answer that question, not yet. Maybe he thought it was related to their current case. Maybe it was relevant to the one she hadn’t opened yet.

  Finally Noelle reached and opened the file in her lap, raising her eyebrows when she did so. It was a double-homicide, something delightfully plain and rather ordinary. A man and a woman, a soulmate pair, seemingly killed during a burglary.

  “Isn’t this something you would give a rookie cop?” she asked, a bit put out. Riley had taken two of her cases and given them to others for this?

  Riley raised his eyebrows. She could have sounded more enthusiastic, that was true, but. It wasn’t anything extraordinary. “That’s the point.”

  Noelle frowned. “I’m a rookie now?”

  “You -” He pointed to Noelle - “Are going to take her -” He pointed to a short, athletic-looking woman who had just entered, dressed like a detective - “And start mentoring her. This is a nice, basic case for the two of you to look into.”

  Noelle felt a mix of elated and stung. It was some sort of promotion, an acknowledgement of her hard work - she was going to mentor another detective with only seven years on the force! And another woman at that - there was only six of them in the major crimes division, and a handful more on forensics, compared to the forty plus men that made up their part of the team.

  Still, she couldn’t help but think that Riley just wanted to get rid of her. Was - was there some sort of punishment in this? He didn’t want to be her partner anymore?

  “This is a good thing,” he said, his voice kind. “I’m still your partner - we’ve got cases of our own, you know - but you’re going to serve as one of Aileen’s trainers while she orients to the force.”

  “She’s brand new?” Noelle watched the way Aileen settled into leaning against the wall, watching everyone and everything.

  “Year as a traffic cop in Detroit, and then she and her partner wanted to move somewhere smaller. Partner’s an author and wanted a more inspiring city.” Riley used air quotations to properly demonstrate what he thought about someone calling their city inspiring. Noelle had to agree Stendale was rather big, all in all, and not really quaint. But maybe it was right for them.

  “You’re not getting rid of me,” she informed him, standing.

  “Of course not.” Riley looked mock offended. “I’ve rather gotten used to having a newbie doing all of my work.”

  Noelle rolled her eyes. “You might have to drive yourself to your own crime scenes now.”

  Riley chuckled, standing and clearing the path for Noelle to leave her cubicle. “Speaking of, I think you need to take someone to a certain crime scene.”

  Noelle looked at him for a moment, and then a smile graced her face. “I’ll go introduce myself.”

  Two days later, the adrenaline and rush from the semi-promotion had faded.

  Sara still hadn’t returned her calls. Instead Noelle sat on her couch at home, glaring at the walls. She had a few more hours before her shift, and she had finally gotten her blackout curtains fixed so she was getting more sleep.

  Maybe she could go to the gym. She glanced at her tennis shoes, at her workout clothes, and then down at the flannel pyjamas she was in. Nah. Too much effort. Although she would go to krav maga tomorrow, she decided. She had to put at least some effort into maintaining her appearance.

  Working with Aileen had been both more rewarding and more frustrating than she had anticipated. Aileen was smart, but she wasn’t aware of protocol - not that there was anything wrong with that, not with only two days on the job. Still, after seven years of working with Riley, Noelle had gained a healthy appreciation for how the department did things.

  Aileen had switched to nights for the rest of the week and she was assigned to Noelle’s side for two of her four shifts. The other two would be spent with Riley, working exclusively on their cases. With Aileen with her, Noelle would work primarily on their more elementary case, but also show Aileen how she worked on her own, independent cases.

  It was more work than Noelle had anticipated, but it was fun, too.

  She sighed.

  Fun had been great and all until she got home after a busy day to see no missed texts, no missed messages. No attempts from Sara to get in contact at all.

  Maybe she was being too pushy, she mused. Sara was busy, she had to work. Her shifts were longer than Noelle’s, although not quite as numerous. Maybe Noelle had just hit her on a bad run of days.

  Still, Noelle couldn’t help but think that maybe the quiet was her fault. Maybe she had driven Sara away because she had pried into Clark, and into her life before she met Noelle. If Noelle had kept her mouth shut, then maybe it wouldn’t be awkward between them.

  Noelle groaned, lifting her head up from the couch and letting it fall down with a muted thud. It wasn’t as painful as she would have preferred, but it would likely give her a headache. Sigh.

  Then again, she did have aspirin in her medicine cabinet. She picked up her phone, stared at it. Did she text Sara again? Or were three texts in two days considered too pushy?

  She wrinkled her nose, scrolling down to her mother’s number. She had a couple hours to waste before she went back to work. Maybe listening to her mother ramble on about anyone she had ever known would help.

  It was more of a challenge than Noelle had anticipated to keep herself completely focused on work. For all that she had been working as a detective for going on seven years, she found the multitasking as difficult as she had when she was a rookie. “Still no message?” Riley asked, appearing out of nowhere as he always did.

  “I am going to tie a bell to you,” Noelle threatened.

  Riley shrugged good-naturedly, but he didn’t say anything else, still waiting.

  Noelle’s shoulders sagged. “No.”

  “You said she’s working opposite shifts, right?” Riley settled into the chair that he had gotten into the habit of leaving right in front of Noelle’s cubicle. It was incredibly inconvenient.

  “Yes. Day shifts.” She glanced at the clock. Sara was likely asleep, anyway. It was two am.

  “What about your meeting?” Riley kept his voice low. Noelle wasn’t entirely sure why - it wasn’t like the entire departme
nt didn’t know about her Loss Meetings, or the fact that she was now widowed.

  “She didn’t come to that,” Noelle said morosely. “Technically she only has to go every other week.”

  “Maybe it was her off week.” Riley stifled a yawn. Noelle glared at him, and then fought off her own yawn. She was already tired, she didn’t need him making it worse.

  “She -” Noelle sighed. “She always comes when I’m there.”

  Riley was silent for a moment, and Noelle looked up to see him attempting to contain his mirth. She narrowed her eyes at him, smacking him with the nearest file. “You said it, not me.”

  “I don’t know how Elsy puts up with you,” Noelle muttered with a shake of her head.

  “Neither do I.” He smiled, and then his face shifted to solemn again. “She’s just busy.”

  “But -” Noelle stopped herself. He didn’t know, he didn’t need to know. “Yeah. Probably.”

  Riley glanced around furtively, and then reached out and gave her a hug.

  She hugged him back. “Don’t want others seeing you being such a softie?”

  He winked. “I have a reputation to maintain, after all.”

  She laughed. “We’re going to see the Reacher witness at six, right?”

  “Yup.” For once they had ended up with a witness who worked night shift like they did and who didn’t want to be interviewed at two pm on a weekday. Instead, she and Riley were going to visit them after their shift ended.

  “Tomorrow evening is a visit to the suspect in the Kennedy case.” Noelle raised her eyebrows as she spoke, looking at Riley to ensure that he was certain.

  “Yup.” Riley looked grim for once - and that was saying a lot.

  “Any idea what we’ll find?”

  “Not at all.”

  Noelle let out a short laugh. Of course not. “Sounds good to me.”

  He smiled. “Work on your paperwork,” he advised. “Then we’ll go meet that witness at six.”

  Noelle mock-saluted, and then turned back to everything she needed to get done.

  It was three days later when Sara finally texted her back. Sorry, been busy. I’m fine. You?

  Noelle stared at the short little text. She didn’t know what to think about it, what it meant, what it signified. At least she was at home and could respond instead of at work, tied up with a witness. It was four pm and Noelle was awake, lounging about while she waited for her shift to start in two hours.

  Working. Same old. Do you want to get dinner tomorrow? She was free, and hopefully Sara was, too.

  Sorry, can’t.

  Noelle felt a flash of anger and she nearly threw her phone across the room. Had she screwed up that badly? Did Sara hate her, for the sins she had committed? Why had things gone from going so well to being a complete trainwreck?

  Oh. Okay.

  What else was there to say? I want to see you? I miss you? No, none of that. Not now. What if it just upset Sara further?

  We could try next week?

  Noelle stared down at her phone. That wasn’t entirely a no, then. Just not a now.

  I would like that.

  She hesitated.

  I miss you, she texted. She really did. Was it wrong of her to say? Maybe too clingy? Not that she cared, not anymore.

  I miss you too, Sara texted back.

  Noelle’s chest suddenly felt too warm, and her cheeks were pink. Sara missed her! She really did. Just us, or with my coworker, Riley?

  Whatever you want.

  The delays between texts were short, which surprised and pleased Noelle. At least, for once in over a week, Sara was paying attention to her phone.

  Just us. ;) You can meet Riley’s wife another time. Noelle bit her lip, held her breath. Sara had said it was up to her, but was it really? Would she disagree with Noelle’s choice?

  Sounds good to me. Be safe at work. I have to go.

  Noelle stared at Sara’s text, a slight frown. She had to go? Odd wording.

  I will. You too, Noelle added, after a moment’s contemplation. That was what she disliked about texting, not being able to see someone else’s responses or know what they were thinking. There was so much you could read from their body language or facial expressions - it had come in use when she was working, why would it not do the same when she was talking to her girlfriend?

  If they were still dating at this point, anyway.

  Noelle glanced at the clock. Still an hour and a half before she had to leave. She stood up, walking over to the small bookshelf that she had near her bedroom. It didn’t hold much, just her favorite short stories that she had kept with her when she moved out there. “Which one, which one.” Her fingertips slid carefully over the hardbound binds of the books. While she had an ereader, when she was home, she much preferred paper books.

  Picking out one of her favorites, she settled on the couch. At least in the books there was always a happy ending.

  Chapter Thirteen

  Noelle’s nerves started to grow as the week passed into the next. She had gotten ahold of Sara - all by text, of course - and they had picked Tuesday for a dinner night. It was at Sara’s place, and Noelle had decided to pack an overnight bag and keep it in the car. She wasn’t brave enough to bring it inside, not without clearing it with Sara ahead of time. But she wanted to have it, just in case.

  The week had passed slowly, but all of a sudden it was Tuesday and she was not ready. Her stomach was a tight knot of nerves, and she had trouble sleeping, even after her night shift left her exhausted. It was the last of the bunch - she would go back to days on Thursday morning, with Wednesday off - but she still struggled to fall asleep.

  Maybe it wasn’t a good choice to go over to Sara’s, she mused. Maybe it would be - better to stay home or take a nap or something. Something that wasn’t going over to Sara’s and making what was sure to be an epic fool out of herself. The last thing she wanted Sara to know was that Noelle had been worried about something Sara had already explained.

  Or maybe that wasn’t the logical way to be, Noelle reasoned with herself as she drove to Sara’s apartment. They were both reasonable adults, after all. If Noelle had a conflict with anyone else at work, she would tell them.

  But this. Noelle’s heart ached. This was different. Sara was her last chance at a happy ending. Not that Noelle didn’t love her outside of her existence - that is, she loved Sara for being Sara, not for being one of the few available women. But she was also aware that if she lost Sara, there were not many replacements. She couldn’t risk leaving someone out in the cold, ruining someone else’s happily ever after.

  Not that feelings were that logical. Noelle had limited experience, but it had taught her that much.

  Taking a deep breath, she parked in visitor parking, grabbed the wine bottle that she had brought to drink, and headed up the steps to Sara’s apartment. It was a route she was oddly familiar with by now, and she didn’t grab the handrails for support as she made her way up the steps.

  Then she knocked on the door. It was the longest two seconds of her life.

  Then Sara opened it, a tired smile on her face, and she quickly pulled Noelle in for a hug and a gentle, brief kiss. “Hi,” Sara said, reluctant to let Noelle go. They stood there for a minute or two, wrapped up in each other.

  “Dinner is getting cold,” Noelle murmured, although she didn’t want to let go either.

  Sara gave her one last squeeze and then let go. Noelle smiled, comforted by Sara’s presence.

  Noelle took her coat off, hanging it up and delighting in the warmth of Sara’s apartment. It was the annoying time of year where you needed a jacket in the morning and evenings, but not in the afternoon. “Hello,” Noelle said again, not even fighting a smile when Sara turned to look at her after locking the door.

  “Hi.” Sara smiled, but it was a more distant smile than Noelle was used to. The previous uncertainties came rushing back, her happiness lost. Suddenly it was hard to smile. “Dinner’s on the table.” She took the wine from
Noelle, taking it to the kitchen to be decanted.

  Noelle followed, uncertain. Should she say something? Did she really want to confirm that it was her fault, that she was doing something wrong?

  Then again, that could lead to it being fixed, to Sara telling her how to do things differently.

  Her mind spun in circles even as she settled at the small table, across from Sara. Sara finished bringing over the last plates for dinner and then glasses of wine. Noelle smiled. “Thanks.”

  Sara nodded, settling into her chair and stifling a yawn. “Sorry,” she said. “Late day at work. Not sleeping well.” She smiled, apologetic.

  Noelle nodded, sympathetic. “Sounds like you’ve been working lots.”

  Sara made a face. “That’s putting it politely. One of our partners quit, which means we have to work overtime until we hire someone new.”

  Noelle wrinkled her nose. It both made sense and didn’t seem fair. “You’re one of the newest, right?”

  Sara nodded. “Means I’ve been working the lion’s share of the shifts.”

  Noelle shook her head, demonstrating her opinion, even as she picked up her fork and started on the chicken and noodles in front of her. “It looks delicious,” she said as a change of topic. She didn’t want to talk about work.

  “It is,” Sara said, winking and then laughing. Noelle couldn’t help a chuckle and a smile. Things eased slightly, her tension dissipating from her shoulders and allowing her to relax and actually enjoy her evening.

  “I missed you,” Noelle said quietly, her feet brushing Sara’s under the table.

  Sara smiled sadly. “I miss you too.” She hesitated, seeming conflicted.

  Noelle frowned, uneasiness causing her stomach to churn. Was she missing something, was she wrong? Was there something bad coming towards the two of them?

  “Are you - have you been avoiding me?” Noelle spoke hesitantly. She didn’t want to risk making Sara more upset, but there had been something going on, and she wanted to make sure that there wasn’t anything she could fix.