Goodness Had Nothing to Do With It

by Lucy Monroe

  "Of course I wondered why you hadn't said anything," she said, her voice rising in agitation. "I asked about it, remember? But you refused to tell me why."

  "What if I said I had a price for my silence?" He couldn't believe he'd asked that.

  He would no more blackmail her than commit his own act of espionage. So, why had he said it?

  "Don't be ridiculous, Marcus. Blackmail isn't your style and you know it."

  She was back to sounding disinterested, almost bored, and that did something to him. He'd spent eighteen months pining for a spy and she acted like she'd never thought about him once, like the idea of sleeping with him again was a joke.

  Something inside him snapped at her cool indifference.

  "Maybe I learned something from you when you left."

  "What do you mean?"

  "How to play in the big leagues. What if I said that my price for that silence was for you to sleep with me?"

  There was a split second of silence and then the phone clicked with ominous finality in his ear.

  Damn. He'd said it. He'd actually threatened to blackmail Ronnie back to his bed. He couldn't believe he'd let it go that far and, worse, he couldn't believe how much the idea annealed to him. Decent men did not blackmail women into sleeping with them and virile men didn't have to. He'd always considered himself both.

  The receiver in his hands started to beep.

  Oh, hell. What had he done?

  Chapter Four

  Veronica stared at the green cordless phone in her hand and wondered if it would bite her.

  No. Of course not. Phones didn't bite. It wasn't a dog, or a man rabid for a taste of revenge.

  She'd been feeling on the edge of her sanity for a while now. Had she finally gone over? Or had Marcus actually attempted to force her back into his bed? She could not make herself believe that he had just threatened to tell Mr. Kline about her past if she didn't sleep with him.

  She shook her head in denial of the euphemism. No, not sleep. Never sleep. He wanted sex, plain and simple.

  When she and Marcus had shared a bed in the past, sleeping had been the furthest thing from either of their minds. Not that she would have objected to waking some morning in the security of his arms, but Marcus didn't do things that way. It was all part of the no-ties package. Sleeping, really sleeping, together might be construed as some kind of commitment.

  Still, a carefree and easy bachelor who had a thing against commitment in any form was a far cry from a man who would blackmail a woman into his bed. Wasn't he?

  She felt herself tremble and carefully laid the phone down on the sofa table before she dropped it.

  The scent of beef stew simmering in the Crock-Pot registered at the same time as her sister's voice singing silly songs to Aaron in the other room. Mundane things… everyday occurrences that made it no easier to come to grips with the unbelievable conversation she had just had with Marcus.

  The man had tried to blackmail her.

  But it was more than that. He had shown more interest in her personal life than he had eighteen months ago, when they'd been lovers.

  She couldn't understand it any more than she could comprehend the seductive feeling of hope curling up in her insides. Could she truly be hoping for some sort of reconciliation?

  Only a besotted fool would be feeling hope after that conversation, she lectured herself.

  The fact that Marcus was threatening her was bad enough, but what was beyond her comprehension, what made her shake with real fear, was how tantalizing she found the prospect of being intimate with him again. She'd missed him so much the months they had been apart.

  Leaving him had opened a gaping hole in her heart that neither her son's birth nor the remission of her sister's disease could fill. She'd never had another lover, and if she were honest, she would admit she never wanted to make love with anyone but Marcus.

  She sank onto the overstuffed green couch she'd gotten for a song at a garage sale from a retired couple intent on moving into a smaller home. She usually felt a certain satisfied gratitude whenever she sat on the comfy cushions, being reminded how lucky she had been to get good furniture at such an affordable price. She'd bought several other things from the couple, but right now gratitude for her windfall was the furthest thing from her mind,

  Marcus's threats brought images that she'd tried hard to suppress over the past months rushing to the forefront of her mind. Memories of her first time with Marcus washed over her. They were so intense that for a second she imagined she could still feel the pressure of his lips from the simple kiss that went so far out of control.

  They'd been flirting in the office for weeks. He'd cajoled her into going out with him a few times and had kissed her on the occasions she did, telling her in graphic terms how much he wanted her. She'd held him off, instinctively knowing they wanted different things from a relationship.

  Namely, she wanted a future and he wanted a body.

  But she couldn't stop seeing him, couldn't resist the seductive lure of the flirting and attention from the man she loved. Inevitably, the yearning and desires that she had kept in check the three years she had loved Marcus from afar broke through the tenuous hold she had had on her self-control.

  And one night when he had kissed her, she had plastered herself against his body in mindless longing and need. Even in her innocence, she had recognized the signs that he was just as affected as she. She'd been amazed.

  That alone had been enough to send her beyond common sense and she had said one thing she knew she shouldn't have. "Love me, Marcus. Please, love me."

  Then, she had felt his hands on her face while his body stilled against hers. "Open your eyes."

  She had obeyed him, though she hadn't wanted to. She had wanted to hide behind the darkness of her closed eyelids, but he wouldn't let her.

  She'd known somehow that what he wanted to say was something she didn't want to hear. She'd been right.

  His eyes had turned the color of theCaribbean Sea . "It's sex, Ronnie. Not love. I don't believe in that fairy tale myth that other people use as an excuse to make bad decisions. I'm offering you sex.The best damn sex you've ever had ."

  She hadn't doubted that. Even if she'd ever had sex before, she would know that Marcus's brand of lovemaking would outshine any other man's for her. Because shedid believe in love and she loved him. There was really only one choice she could make.

  So, she had made it. "I want you."

  He hadn't resumed his overwhelming touching right away but had fixed her with an intense look. "I'm not looking for permanent ties, Ronnie. You understand that, don't you?"

  She had nodded, accepting that their relationship had no future. "No ties. No commitments."

  She would have him in the present and right then that was all that had mattered.

  "Right." He had smiled and then his expression had turned heated with blatant male desire.

  She had worried that he would be angry when he realized she was a virgin and think she was trying to trap him with her innocence. Instead, his eyes had flared with surprise when he felt her body's barrier.

  He'd stooped moving. "Baby, are you sure?"

  She'd known he would withdraw if she said no.

  She hadn't. She had wanted him too much, had desperately needed the brief time they could have together to stave off the fear and loneliness surrounding her life with Jenny at the time.

  He had finished the joining, binding her to him in a way that had been both physical and spiritual.

  For her, it had been an act of love so intense she still ached from the recollection.

  For Marcus, it had been just sex.

  He'd used a condom that first time, but she had insisted on going on the Pill. She hadn't wanted even that thin barrier between them. If she could only have him for a short while, she wanted every bit of him she could have.

  It was a decision that had far-reaching consequences.

  Any other form of birth control could have failed as well
, and she'd refused to beat herself up about it.

  Her son had not been an accident.

  Regardless of how complicated her life had become, she considered her baby a blessed result of her love for Marcus.

  The sound of Aaron's laughter and Jenny's voice talking nonsense reached her from the other room, bringing her back to the present and the reality of her recent phone call with Marcus.

  As she replayed the conversation in her head, she tried to understand why Marcus had attempted to blackmail her back into his bed. The man had too much integrity to resort to such base behavior; so much integrity that she had been sure her desperate actions at CIS would make him despise her forever.

  Besides, he needed to blackmail a woman into his bed like a desert sheik needed to import sand. So, why had he tried to?

  He couldn't really want her. Could he?

  The idea was ludicrous. Marcus could have any woman he wanted, His blond good looks and sexy humor made him irresistible to the opposite sex. She'd seen enough of that the day before just introducing him around the marketing department.

  He didn't need to resort to taking a woman to bed whom he despised to fulfill his sexual needs.

  But he had implied that was exactly what he wanted.

  What could that mean, but that he did want her?

  Could his awful threat be his way of reestablishing intimacy between them, even if he did not consciously realize it? If she could have shaken herself, she would have.

  Just as she had tried to convince herself a year and a half ago that she meant more than a casual bed partner to Marcus, she was now trying to believe his motives were somehow related to his feelings for her. Feelings he did not have.

  With blinding clarity, she realized she had re-turned to thePacific Northwest not just because it was home, but because she would be closer to Marcus. She was still chasing after rainbows, hoping to gain his love and trust once again. She gave a self-derisive snort. What an idiot.

  The most likely explanation for Marcus's threats was plain and simple revenge.

  She could just see him gloating as she agreed to go to bed with him, her heart all swelled with hope and wanting. Then he would turn her down flat and laugh in her face, or some such horrible scenario.

  She was tempted to say yes just to get the torment of waiting over with. At least then she'd know what form his revenge would take. Something told her that if she called his bluff, even if Marcus rejected her, his own sense of honor would prevent him from turning on her later and telling Mr. Kline about her actions at CIS. After all, they would have a deal.

  The question was: Did she have the courage to risk getting eaten in order to attempt declawing the lion?

  Allison waited for Marcus Danvers to arrive for his morning appointment with George. She sat in her chair behind her desk in the anteroom outside the president's office just as if she hadn't woken feeling snuggly and sated in his bed two hours before.

  At forty-five, single and a grandmother, snuggly and sexually sated were not emotions she took for granted.

  George Kline had brought an element back into her life she'd believed gone forever when her first husband left her for his bimbette sales manager three years ago.

  Sexuality.

  She was a sexual being.

  She was also a damn fine personal assistant and George appreciated both elements of her nature.

  It flattered her. Such a dynamic and wealthy man could have his pick of young, nubile beauties, but he'd chosen her.

  She smiled at him when he walked out of his office.

  "Danvershere yet?"

  "No, George, he's not."

  He frowned, his pale eyes narrowing. "I told you to call me Mr. Kline in the office, Allison."

  He was fanatical about keeping their relationship at work separate from their private life. Kline Technologies strongly discouraged personal relationships between employees. George believed in setting an example.

  Sometimes she slipped up.

  She didn't mean to, but it was hard to separate the two areas of her life completely when he played such a major role in both of them. "I'm sorry."

  He nodded, brisk and efficient. No sentimentality to mar his perfect business image.

  "WhenDanvers gets here, send him right in."

  "Yes, sir."

  He smiled, his approval warming her even though it was short-lived, and he disappeared into his office a second later.

  Marcus Danvers arrived five minutes later and

  Allison showed him into George's office with all the professional decorum at her disposal.

  Okay, you can do this. Think lion tamer. Think safety for you and your family.

  Veronica's short self-lecture did nothing to slow the pulse that had begun throbbing at the base of her throat at the first sign of Marcus's golden hair above the cubicle walls. He was obviously headed in her direction. She slid shut the file drawer she had been looking in and sat in her desk chair, trying to compose her features in a cool mask before Marcus entered her cubicle.

  After several deep breaths and a few more bracing self-directives, she felt ready.

  Right.

  About as ready as a four-year-old to go toe-to-toe with a grown-up.

  Marcus walked in, filling the small space with his distinctly male presence. Other men had been in her cubicle, dozens of them, but not one had dominated the enclosure as Marcus did.

  "Good morning, Ronnie. I trust you slept well last night."

  She'd tossed and turned in her bed for hours, gnawing on their conversation in her mind.

  "Like a baby," she said and forced herself not to wince at the poor choice of words.

  The last thing she needed right now was a reminder of the guilt she felt at not yet telling Marcus about their child. Even if he didn't want to know, she still felt guilty.

  He smiled, his eyes mocking her lie. "I'm glad. I

  wouldn't want to think you might have been upset about anything I said on the phone last night."

  He knew she hadn't slept a wink. The rat. "About that…"

  Shecould do this. Just call his bluff and it would all be over. She'd be safe at Kline Tech and he would have gotten the revenge he clearly needed. It was all very balanced, very logical… and very terrifying.

  He shook his head with feigned regret. "Sorry. I don't have time to get into it now. I just stopped by to see if you could get me on Jack's calendar for lunch sometime this week."

  She stared at him, feeling her mouth drop open in ridiculous amazement. The man was blackmailing her but didn't have time to go into it?

  "You want an appointment for lunch with Jack?" She felt like she was strangling on her own voice.

  "That about covers it." He thrust his hands in his pockets and leaned against the doorway. "Oh, I also wouldn't mind some help getting a temporary office set up. I should have asked Kline's personal assistant, but he got a phone call shortly after I arrived for our meeting this morning and I didn't think of it. Is that something you can do?"

  "Of course." Hadn't Mr. Kline practically ordered her to help Marcus in any way he needed?

  "So, what day do you think would work for Jack?"

  Disoriented by the mundane question when she had psyched herself up for a confrontation, she forced herself to focus on the computer screen. She clicked into Jack's calendar. "Tuesday or Thursday would be best. He can take a long lunch either day."

  "Let's make it Thursday. I'm still getting my feet wet around here and want to wait to meet with him after I have a better feel for Kline Technology's environment."

  She nodded. He and Alex had always taken their consulting services very seriously. They didn't just steer clients to particular investments because of earning potential but took the time to match their clients with other strategic fits.

  She entered the appointment into Jack's calen dar and then turned back to face Marcus. "You're set. I'll send an e-mail to Jack letting him know I put you on the calendar for Thursday."

  Marcus p
ushed away from the door and moved toward her. Mesmerized by the suddenly intent look swirling in his aquamarine eyes, she waited to see what he would do.

  When he was just a couple of feet away, he reached out and caressed the line of her jaw with one finger. "You're pretty damn efficient, Ronnie. We miss you in the office. Your replacement isn't nearly as organized."

  A short laugh of disbelief erupted from her throat as searing jealousy coursed through her at the idea of another woman filling her place at CIS and perhaps in Marcus's life.