The Hastings Series

by Vanessa Siena

  “I’m not sick.” I felt my eyes tear up. Hearing it from her only made me realize how right she was.

  Bliss bit her bottom lip, shaking her head slowly and reaching out to grab my hand. She squeezed it tightly.

  “Being bipolar should be taken seriously, Hun. And you know how serious I am about it. I’ve always wanted you to get better. Help you handle it all, but you always refused. You know I’m here, and I think this time it would be best if you would listen to me. For once.”

  Chapter Forty

  Hunter

  “Damn, Bliss,” Jagger said, now standing next to the booth, looking down at us. “How on earth did you make this fucker cry?” His tone was mocking, and I quickly brushed away the one tear rolling down my face. I hadn’t cried in a while. Not sure when the last time was that I did, but it was long ago. I never wanted to face this. I pushed it aside and hoped no one would get to me the way Bliss did right now. I didn’t allow people to get that close and thank fuck they didn’t.

  Growing up in different homes with different parents and spending years and years trying to figure out why my mom and dad left me at the orphanage when I was a baby was a memory I wanted to make disappear. I hated thinking about it and it only made me angrier. I’d met Bliss at the orphanage. We were both still little and were one day put into a home together at which we stayed for almost a year. The foster parents we had weren’t really qualified to foster orphan kids, but no one ever did a really good background check on them. The people we lived with were in their thirties and only one of them worked. They didn’t have a lot of money, and even if I was only four, I knew something was wrong with them. There was smoke in the air in every room of the house and the furniture was old and dirty. We didn’t have many toys to play with. Just one small soccer ball, a puzzle, and a hairless Barbie. I remember thinking I finally had a mom and dad I could spend the rest of my life with, but I was so damn wrong. Those people didn’t care for us or our health. They never really cooked, instead ordered pizza or Chinese food every day. All they cared about was the money they got from the city, which was meant to be used for us, Bliss and me. For new clothes, healthy food, and books and toys. We got none of that. Six-year-old Bliss told me made-up stories each night so I could fall asleep. Most of them were about two kids with superpowers, saving the world from evil people who took orphan kids into their homes and treated them poorly. Unlike our reality, those super-kids always won and lived happily ever after.

  The real trauma started on my birthday. I turned five that day and I was excited, jumping up and down on the bed I shared with Bliss because the people who took us in promised me a Superman cake and a new Superman figure. The funny thing was, I was naïve enough to believe after months of playing with just three things and eating the same shit over and over again, they would suddenly come home with a big cake and a new toy.

  Of course, they didn’t do any of that. It was early in the morning and I had woken up with the sun and a big smile on my face. I woke up Bliss, telling her how excited I was, and she sang happy birthday to me. I couldn’t sit still that morning and I broke one of the few rules we had to follow in that house: Don’t come out of the bedroom until the alarm goes off.

  The alarm clock sat on the bedside table and it was set to ring at ten-thirty every morning. Up until that time, Bliss and I were both starving from not eating enough the evening before and having to wait until lunch to come. We got used to it eventually.

  It was my birthday, so I thought that that one rule could be broken once. But I was so horribly wrong, and knocking on the bedroom door of those people who made our life a living hell was the worst mistake I had ever made.

  “I guess it’s just a sister-thing,” Bliss said quietly, noticing me not being really present. I blinked multiple times, thankful for her interruption. My thoughts were about to go somewhere dark and I couldn’t handle that at the moment.

  “I’m done with my shift. I’ll get changed, and then I wanna go visit Harlow with you two.” Bliss got up from her seat and patted my shoulder. She bent down, kissing my temple softly.

  When she left, Jagger sat back down and studied my face for a moment. “You okay?”

  I nodded, looking up at him with a tight smile. “Just some past shit. Nothing to worry about.” Jagger knew a lot about me, just like I knew a lot about him. But this I kept secret. Bliss was the only person who I knew could handle all of this, and I didn’t want anyone else to feel the need to help me out with my problems. I didn’t want to bother anyone with it.

  “I’m here, all right?” Jagger said in a lower voice. I nodded again, knowing he was not just saying that to make me feel better. “Yeah, me too.”

  Bliss came back and we headed out to Jagger’s car. The drive to the hospital was silent, and I thought about waiting to go there since the doc and Harlow said they would inform us when she was done. I didn’t want to rush her, but I needed to see her again. Luckily, just as we pulled up to the parking lot in front of the hospital, Jagger received a text from Harlow, saying she was done with all the examinations. Thank fuck.

  We went up to her room and Jagger knocked, going in first, then I followed him and Bliss was close behind me. I saw Harlow smile as soon as she saw her brother, and just that made me want to pull her into my arms and keep her as close as possible. She was full of joy and I was still surprised by how well she was doing after the accident. Talk about superpowers.

  “I brought someone who wanted to see you. I hope you don’t mind,” Jagger said, kissing Harlow’s forehead and then looking back at Bliss. Harlow’s eyes went directly to Bliss and her smile grew. “Bliss, so nice to see you.”

  “You too, darling. How are you feeling?” Bliss asked. I shoved my fists in my pocket, a little hurt about the fact that she hadn’t even looked at me yet. “I feel better. Much better.” Harlow’s eyes went back to Jagger, then finally, they traveled over to me and her smile faded while her eyes grew slightly bigger and fear mixed with empathy danced around her gaze.

  “Have you been crying?” she asked softly, holding out her hand to me and, damn…I guess she could read me just as well as I read her.

  Chapter Forty-One

  Hunter

  I walked over to her, taking her hand in mine and lifting it to my lips to kiss it softly while looking into her eyes. “I’m all good, sweetheart,” I assured her. But she was already on to me, and the look she gave me told me she didn’t believe one bit of those words.

  “Are you sure?” she asked, lifting an eyebrow and squeezing my hand slightly. My lips pressed into a thin line and I lowered my head, kissing her cheek.

  “Not here,” I whispered in her ear, letting her know I wasn’t going to talk about it with my sister and her brother in the room. If I was going to tell her everything about my messed up brain, I wanted to do it with only her in my presence. Harlow nodded, a worried look coming over her face. I gave her a small smile, hoping she could be patient enough to wait until we were alone.

  “What did the doc say?” Jagger asked, pretty much helping me out. Or he was just hoping to change the subject because I knew it was still a bit weird for him to see us getting this close. I let go of her hand and took a step back, then sat down in the chair by the window on the other side of the room. I rubbed the stubbles on my jaw, taking in the scene in front of me. It was strange seeing my sister, my best friend, and Harlow at once. I’ve always wanted to keep them separated from each other because each of them handled me differently. Bliss was blunt with her words and thoughts. She never kept anything hidden from me and always checked in as soon as she knew something was going on. Jagger was not only my best friend but also my partner. The things we did weren’t something for weak-hearted people and we also had to keep most of our business to ourselves. Of course, other guys we worked with knew about the things we did. But I shouldn’t have told Bliss about any of the jobs we’d done. I should’ve kept it secret, just like Jagger did with Harlow. But Bliss wasn’t Harlow. My sister took it hard a
t first, shouted at me, and even threatened me. She was fucking pissed the day she made me tell her where I got the money from that I had used to get her a new apartment. At first, I was trying to keep it to myself, and not telling her sounded better than letting her in on the shit I did to earn money, but when Bliss wanted to know something, she wouldn’t back down until she knew. So my only way out of her screaming my ears off was to tell her.

  She was handling it better now, knowing I wasn’t going to get hurt. I was good with guns and knives. They didn’t scare me, and handling one of those weapons made me feel strong. I had power over everything for once. Growing up the way I did was hard, and power wasn’t something I had felt until the first night working for Gunner. He offered me a job that would get me two thousand dollars, and that amount of money was a lot for just setting up a small car bomb and making sure the guy driving it would die the second he turned on the engine. It was easy money, and indirectly killing someone gave me a huge adrenalin thrust. I wanted more. And I also realized it was the only thing I was good at. So why would I ever stop?

  “I’m not allowed to go home yet. I don’t need help breathing but my lungs are still aching a bit.” Harlow’s voice broke through my thoughts and I looked back up to Harlow from the plant sitting in a corner I was blankly staring at. Damn, she looked beautiful in a messy ponytail and natural face.

  “I can’t really walk. My ribs are still healing and standing up is a bit hard.”

  “Staying here for a while is probably the best idea, ” Jagger said with the same worried expression she gave me just minutes ago.

  “You’re right.” Her voice was calm, still, you could tell she was slightly annoyed that she wasn’t allowed to go home. “I would like to take a shower.”

  “Okay.” Jagger gave her a small smile, looking over to the bathroom door.

  “I don’t have fresh clothes here. Or my towel,” Harlow added.

  “We’ll get that for you, sweet girl.” Jagger looked over to Bliss, nodding toward the door. “Let’s go back home to get her things. You probably know best what she needs.” Bliss quickly nodded, smiling at Harlow, and then looking over to me. They were going to give us some space. Perfect.

  As soon as they left, I turned my gaze to Harlow, her eyes already fixed on me. We stayed quiet for a while, then she inhaled deeply and let the air out of her body again. “I don’t like seeing you like this.”

  The corner of my mouth lifted slightly and I ran my hand over my face. “There’s just a lot on my mind,” I told her, looking back up at her.

  She nodded slowly. “Will you talk to me about it?” she asked and I nodded quickly.

  “One step at a time, remember, love?” I said with a small smile, then standing up and walking over to her. “I know. It’s just…” She sighed, her brows narrowing. “I know something’s going on, but I just don’t know how to help you if you don’t communicate with me.”

  My hands cupped her face, running my thumbs over her soft cheeks. “I need to figure some things out, make sure everything fits into place, and I promise I will tell you everything after.”

  “Hunter…”

  “Hey, listen to me,” I said in a lower voice, almost whispering. I bent down so we were eye to eye. “I told you I need to figure things out, and as soon as I do, you can ask me anything. But for now, let me tell you what I choose to tell you. Is that good enough?”

  She was hesitant, making me wait on her response. She studied my face, letting her eyes travel all over my face until they stopped at my lips.

  “Kiss me,” she whispered. I smiled now, pressing my lips to hers and taking in her sweet taste.

  Chapter Forty-Two

  Harlow

  His lips moving against mine and his tongue dancing with mine made me feel better. It was a stupid thing to say, but his kiss was more useful than any medicine Dr. Sullivan had given me in the past few days. I felt better, knowing Hunter wasn’t leaving. Although, him coming in here with teary eyes made me worry about him. Even more than before. I knew something was going on. Something he was holding back, and it probably wasn’t something I would accept, or else he would’ve told me before. But just like with Jagger, I wasn’t going to stick my nose into their business unless they were open to telling me themselves.

  Of course, nothing good was going on with them. Jagger never talked to me about it, but I knew drugs were involved. He even carried a gun with him most days and that gun wasn’t to protect him or me from the people in Hastings. We were safe enough as long as we kept our mouths shut and went on with our lives as if nothing ever happened. At least for me, nothing ever happened.

  I decided that letting him move at his own pace was best for both of us. I didn’t want to rush things or put him in a situation where he would just get mad because I’d pushed him into telling me all his secrets. There were things I wasn’t supposed to know and he didn’t have to tell me anything he felt uncomfortable with. For now, this was okay. One step at a time, just like he said.

  His tongue pushed into my mouth while his fingers made their way into my hair at the back of my head. A small moan escaped me as he fisted his hands, pulling at the roots of my hair and loosening up my ponytail a bit. God, how I missed this. Our kiss turned quickly into a passionate make-out and I was happy Jagger and Bliss had left the room. I lifted my hands, one touching his chest, grabbing his sweatshirt tightly, and the other holding onto the side of his neck. Luckily, I was sitting, because I knew my knees would’ve given out by now.

  His kiss was consuming me slowly and it almost felt like he was trying to tell me something. His lips and tongue moved passionately against mine, and his hands started to pull a little more at my hair, then pushing my face against him a bit more so he could dive deeper into the kiss. He had never kissed me like this before. He was so determined, yet tender.

  I let him lead me, wondering if he had the intention to stop sooner or later. Either way, I didn’t mind sitting here, making out with Hunter like two teenagers.

  “We should probably stop,” Hunter murmured under his breath, but instead of letting go, he pressed his lips against mine again. I smiled then, thinking it was too funny that he couldn’t resist.

  I let out a chuckle, pushing against his chest with one hand. “Then stop,” I challenged, my own words making me grin. Now he was the one chuckling and one of his hands cupped the back of my head, gripping at my ponytail.

  “I can’t wait to have you to myself again.” His lips left mine and our eyes locked. We were both out of breath and I suddenly felt empty without his lips touching mine. “But I guess your brother wants to spend some time with you too after you get out of here.”

  I nodded slowly, smiling softly. “I want that too,” I told him, looking down at his lips. “But when I’m allowed to go home, the first thing I want to do is cuddle on the couch and watch a movie with all of you.”

  Hunter studied my face for a while, licking his lips before nodding and giving me one last kiss. “Anything you want, love.”

  Almost half an hour passed as Jagger opened the door after knocking and Bliss followed right behind. A nurse came in last, pushing a little cart with bandages and what looked like plastic wrap on it. “So, you’re ready to take a shower?” she asked with a smile, and I nodded quickly, letting Hunter step away from me. I felt Jagger’s eyes on me before they went to Hunter, who shoved his fists into his pockets and stood there looking a bit unsure about what to say or do. Usually, Hunter was the one who stood there with his head up high, full of confidence that scared me in the beginning.

  “I will help you shower. If your ribcage hurts too much, we can just put some plastic around your bandage. But if you want to change it, we can do that too.”

  “I’d like to take this bandage off to shower. I think I’ll handle without it for a few minutes.”

  The nurse nodded and walked over to my side. She looked up, obviously a little overwhelmed with all the people standing there and watching her. “You guys should wai
t outside,” I told them and smiled to assure them I was fine.

  Jagger didn’t respond at first. God, this was slightly awkward. “Take care of her,” Hunter said to the nurse and I rolled my eyes. The nurse knew what she was doing and I was sure it wasn’t the first time she helped a patient take a shower. It was her job. Hunter seemed a little jealous, which made this whole situation even worse.

  “Let’s get some snacks,” Bliss suggested and put the duffle bag with my things in it on the bed. “I’ll get you some chocolate. It will make you better.” I returned her smile and waited until the three of them left the room, with Hunter scowling at the nurse one last time.

  “They seem very protective,” the nurse said with a smile. I looked up at her and nodded. “They are. Sometimes it’s a little too much, believe it or not.”

  She shrugged and helped me sitting up at the side of the bed. “Some get a lot, and some get none.” I knew what she meant by that. I had to appreciate what I had. I did, but the nurse didn’t know about our past. We had a whole different dynamic, which was scary at times.

  Chapter Forty-Three

  Hunter

  Leaving the hospital took almost three weeks for Harlow and watching a movie right after she got out didn’t go as she had imagined. Only fifteen minutes into the movie she fell asleep with her head in my lap and a small blanket over her body. She wasn’t as fit as she thought she was before we got here and it made me grin when I realized her breathing had evened out and her mind was now in a state of dreaming. Too damn adorable.

  I brushed back her hair, looking down at her beautiful face, and then glancing over at Jagger, who was sitting in the recliner, his elbows propped on his knees and his hands rubbing against each other, almost in a nervous gesture. He met my gaze, lifting an eyebrow and nodding toward Harlow.