She returned a few minutes later with a small suitcase packed.
“Don’t worry, neither the entire fashion industry nor your mom will find out that I’m leaving,” she said with vitriol in her voice. “At least for tonight, though, I’m going to stay at Aaron’s. I hope you understand.”
She came back to the table and placed a quick, dry kiss onto his cheek. It felt like a slap.
CHAPTER TEN
“SCORES THREE FROM the line!” Aaron gloated as he shot a clean basket. Jin bent forward with his hands flat on his thighs as he took in a heaving breath. His best friend was doing a pretty good job of wearing him out on the basketball court.
“I’m coming back, Stewart.” Jin exhaled with a growl. He’d texted Aaron a couple of hours ago to see if he was available to shoot some hoops. Jin hoped the exercise would help him blow off the uncomfortable steam that was percolating toward a boil inside of him. With a lunge of sheer will, Jin darted around Aaron to get close to the basket for a layup. “Not dead yet.”
Yesterday, after the night spent alone in the apartment, Jin had called Aaron at work.
“Look, man, I messed up big time,” he apologized to his friend. “It wasn’t my intention to hurt Mimi. You know that.”
“It sounds as if you’ve broken her heart.”
That stung. The last thing Jin would want to do was cause Mimi pain. She’d been nothing but good to him, and he’d repaid her with a blistering rejection that sent her retreating. He knew that his cruelty was for her own well-being in the long run though. He’d never be a good husband, with the trust and faith she wanted and was entitled to. A grand romance was not in Jin’s future.
Yet with this marriage charade his thoughts and emotions toward Mimi had grown and shifted in ways he wouldn’t have expected.
For starters, he adored living with her. Her lovely face and affectionate smile being the first things he saw every morning were gifts so exquisite he thought surely they had been sent from the heavens. More divine still might have been to fall asleep at night holding her so very close to him, making him feel part of something actual and valid and healthy.
It all seemed natural, it all seemed right. So many little facets about what togetherness could bring were a pleasant surprise to him. They were sincere. And yet they weren’t, because they were only temporary.
When he concocted this ruse, Jin hadn’t actually considered what would happen after the year was over. He supposed that he assumed he and Mimi would go back to being close friends who marched through the trials and tribulations of their lives together. Professionally, he hoped she’d grow into the designer he always knew she could become. That LilyZ would be as solvent and prosperous as it was under his grandfather’s tutelage.
Jin’s own behavior of absurd jealousy when he saw Mimi with other men, and now with her confession of love for him, meant that those what’s next decisions had to be made sooner rather than later.
Had he really not known that Mimi had been in love with him? Honestly, she’d concealed it well. Yes, she had a certain approving look that she’d always given him. One that made him feel good about himself. They complimented each other freely, held similar values, understood each other’s sense of humor. Commiserated with the same point of view about hardships they’d endured. But none of her behavior was anything he perceived as strange given the circumstances. Now he wondered if there were clues that he’d missed all along.
Mimi told him that she hadn’t confided in her brother about her secret love for him. “She said that she’d never talked to you about her...feelings...for me,” Jin said, uncomfortably, to Aaron on the phone last night.
“True. Not a word in thirteen years. But I always knew.”
“You what?”
“A brother can tell.”
“And you didn’t say anything to me? To her?”
“Was it really my business what my little sister had been thinking about you all this time? I could have been completely off base.”
“You could have warned me before I married her.”
Aaron grunted. “Fair enough. I started to but then...”
“Go on.”
“I weighed the benefits against the risks, like any stockbroker would. I thought you could handle it.”
Apparently, he couldn’t.
He glanced over to the nearby stairs down to the subway station. Last time they’d shot hoops here, Jin had watched as Mimi ascended those stairs, bringing her unique brand of sunshine along with her. When he caught her eye, she’d flashed him a charming wholehearted grin.
Overshooting a throw that Aaron was able to rebound, Jin circled around his friend to try to get the ball back. He looked over to the subway stairs again. The huddled masses of New Yorkers shuffled up and down those steps, most in their dark woolen clothes of winter.
Scanning left to right and then back again, no matter how hard Jin searched he didn’t see Mimi in the crowd.
Of course not. She wouldn’t be coming to meet him. He and his second wife had split up.
Yet the Zhangs had a showing to pull off and everything depended on it.
* * *
After he’d showered and trekked the stairs down to the studio, he was relieved to see Mimi at work on a machine.
“Oh. Hi.” She lifted her eyes when she saw him approach.
“Did you come straight over from Aaron’s? He and I were just playing basketball.”
“I know, he told me.”
She went back to her task.
Images whirled around in Jin’s mind, as violently as a tornado.
His mother crying late at night.
One of his father’s conquests making advances toward a twenty-one-year-old Jin at a party.
Mimi in the cabin they’d stayed at alone.
The delighted expression of a kid atop his father’s shoulders that Jin had noticed at the Lunar New Year parade.
The shock of seeing Mimi in that cafe with Uri.
His wedding.
“Ah...” A feverish confusion escaped his lips with a whoosh that Mimi didn’t hear over the hum of her sewing machine.
He studied the back of her head as she sewed. Her auburn hair was so lustrous. It had been like the finest thread in his hands those nights they’d made love, all five of his senses immersed in her as they were carried away in a splendid joining.
“Mimi,” he said loud enough to get her attention and she turned to him.
“I’m very sorry about all of this.”
She nodded slowly.
“Once we get through this showing, we won’t have to spend so much time together. If you can stand to be married to me for the sake of our careers, I’ll make it more bearable. I’ll get you your own apartment. We’ll find a way to keep it a secret. The time will pass quickly and then we can divorce.”
Her eyes opened round as she continued to hold back from saying anything. He wanted to swoop down and cover her inviting mouth with his, and take her tightly into his arms and never let go, which were the opposite actions from the words he was speaking.
The thoughts that churned in him were insane. Were all his firm decisions, his survival tactics, being laid to rest? Did the unthinkable happen, had he become ready for what he thought he never would?
No.
Maybe.
No.
“We have to find a way back to our friendship,” he all but pleaded. “I asked Aaron to forgive me for crossing the line. Can you?”
“You didn’t coerce me into anything. I take responsibility for my own actions.”
She turned back to her sewing and said nothing else, apparently finished with the conversation. Punishing him with her silence.
He’d hurt his friend. His friend. Always had been. Hopefully always would be. On top of that, something unplanned had grown large. Low in the pit of his stom
ach, Jin knew. What he felt was going to be difficult to deny. Impossible, in fact. His wall had been knocked down.
* * *
“It’s seven thirty in the morning, where are you coming from?” Bai quizzed Mimi in front of the Zhangs’ building as she approached.
“Oh. I...uh...went to get breakfast.” Mimi covered even though it didn’t sound convincing. It was unfortunate timing that Bai had arrived at the same minute as she did. She’d hoped to already be in the studio when Bai got there to help with the showing for the retailers today.
Bai gave her a slow gander that Mimi feared was recognition. Mimi was on the street early in the morning in one of her finest dresses with a coat over it. She’d dressed at Aaron’s, where she was now living again, although they hoped to hide that from Bai.
Bai was a smart woman and Mimi worried she quickly put together the clues. “Breakfast?” Bai inquired, noting that Mimi’s hands were empty.
“I ate it while I was walking.”
Mimi punched in the key code outside of the building and let them in. They went up to the studio and she flicked on the overhead lights as they were the first to arrive.
“Where’s Jin?” Bai questioned. Lending further strangeness to the situation since Mimi assumed he was upstairs in the apartment, but she wouldn’t know for sure.
Stacks of party goods had been set up by the little office kitchen. “We’re doing tea.” Mimi jumped into the job at hand to get out of the awkwardness and avoid the question. Bai was going to be the liaison for the caterers. “We ordered all sorts of cakes from Happy Phoenix Bakery. Egg tarts, sesame balls, almond cookies, rice cakes with sweet stuffing.”
“A tea party?”
“We decided to throw in a little theme since it’s New Year’s, and because of the Chinese influence on the blouses we’re showing.”
“That’s good.”
Mimi was glad they’d moved on from the breakfast issue.
“We picked out the hottest Mandarin pop music to play during the showing. The caterer is bringing lanterns to hang for decor. We hired a lion dancer. The retailers will have been dazzled all week by the big flashy shows so we figured we had to do something special.”
“I’m proud of you for pulling all of this together so quickly. You know Shun would be proud of you, too,” Bai said.
Mimi didn’t think that Shun, who had a reputation for honesty, would have much approved of her and Jin’s hijinks, as fundamentally honorable as they were.
The sound of Jin’s footsteps preceded him as he came down from the apartment. “Morning,” he mumbled and went straight to his office. She figured he had too much on his mind to put on a grand husband show for his mom’s benefit. Today would be a whirlwind. They’d all somehow get through it.
Jin’s quick escape didn’t elude his mother’s watchful eye.
“What’s going on with you and Jin?”
As Mimi rolled a clothes rack out from where it had been left last night, the directness of Bai’s question froze her in her tracks.
What could she say that wouldn’t unravel the information Jin didn’t want his mother to know? About Wei’s will being an attempt to ruin Jin and Bai and the family’s reputation. About the fake marriage pact that was now as thin as the thread Mimi plucked from one of the skirts on the rack. About how she and Jin had made love, had thought for a fleeting moment that the pretend could grow into the authentic. She surely couldn’t tell Bai about the feelings she’d held for Jin since the first day she’d met him.
Although this was Mamabai, who Mimi had always gone to for counsel and comfort after her mother died.
Yet she couldn’t tell Mamabai that Jin had shattered her heart when he told her that he could never love her. That would crush her anew, as Mimi knew how much Mamabai cared about her.
Nor would she explain that, unable to withstand the torture of living under the same roof as Jin, she’d gone back to Aaron’s. How Jin told her that he’d rent her an apartment, and they’d keep their split under the radar and remain married for the designated year.
Last night, Mimi had tossed and turned restlessly on Aaron’s sofa bed. There was so much to process. Her first major showing as a designer. Would the retailers like her designs or would they think her an amateur, thereby bringing shame to LilyZ and its legacy? Even if she succeeded, could she work with Jin day after day now that, finally, he knew what she’d been holding private for all these years?
She’d sobbed into her pillow, not wanting to wake her brother. After she had no more tears left, while reaching for a glass of water on the side table, her hand had wrapped around the thimble that Jin had given her in lieu of an engagement ring when he asked her to participate in their charade.
It had been Shun’s, Jin told her. The white bone china was cold to the touch as she rolled it between her fingers. Studying that handpainted detailing of a junk boat, she thought about how much effort it took to create this one tiny item. Everything worth having took work...
Why couldn’t Jin see that?
“Mimi.” Bai brought her mind back to the studio. “Now come on, tell me what’s happening between you and Jin.”
“Maybe it wasn’t so easy to go from friends to husband and wife.” Mimi wanted to talk to Bai but there would still be parts of the story she needed to censor. She glanced over to Jin in his office, out of earshot of the conversation.
Bai seemed to be able to read Mimi. “Has Jin done something that’s hurt you?”
“I think that after Helene, he has more barriers than he realized.” Which, in reality, was an out-and-out lie because he’d told her from the start that he’d never love or trust a woman again. That wasn’t something new that had occurred to him. He’d simply put his theory to the test and proved himself right.
“You’ve been in our life long enough to know that my marriage wasn’t good,” Bai said as Mimi took one of the blouses off the rack and began inspecting every inch of it. “Wei was a troubled man, and he didn’t choose to overcome his obstacles. Or to create a partnership with me.”
“But you stayed with him for decades before you finally left.”
“I suppose I don’t admit defeat easily. For me, that was a mistake. I don’t want to see you make the opposite one and give up. Your parents didn’t.”
“What do you mean, Mamabai?” Mimi shifted her eyes to meet the older woman’s.
“Your parents were madly in love until the day each died, weren’t they? But not from the day they met.”
“Do you know something I don’t?”
“When your mom was in her last weeks, I sat at her bedside. We talked about a lot of things.”
“I remember.”
“She told me all about Benjamin and their road together.”
“How they met when they were both supervisors at a summer camp.”
“Then didn’t see each other again until the following summer. And then not again until the summer after that even though they didn’t live that far apart.”
“My maternal grandfather was very protective.”
“That’s not what your mother told me.”
“It wasn’t?” Mimi shot Mamabai a questioning look. She knew something about her parents Mimi didn’t.
“No. She told me the reason they didn’t see each other was because your father didn’t choose to. He wanted to date other girls and wasn’t willing to give up his freedom.”
“Huh?”
Mimi could hardly believe what she was hearing. Her sweet doting father, who looked at her mother like the sun rose and set in her eyes, didn’t want to commit to her? The man who, in fact, couldn’t even keep himself alive after his wife died, allowing his body to surrender to the hereafter in hope that he would be reunited with his love? Why had neither of her parents ever told her the truth about their courtship? Were they embarrassed?
“She loved h
im,” Bai said with eyes boring into Mimi’s, “so she waited. And he came around. Perfect and easy aren’t either of those. Your mother isn’t here to tell you this but I think she’d want me to say it. Don’t give up on Jin.”
* * *
“Thandy, have you met my wife and newly named designer Mimi Stewart?” Jin introduced Mimi to LilyZ’s most profitable retailer. With Thandy Luard’s well-curated shop on Fifth Avenue, Jin needed her onboard with this new collection.
Mimi shook Thandy’s hand. The woman was all class with her short hairdo, tweed jacket and pearls. Now in her sixties, Thandy had been on the New York scene for decades, and had been carrying the label from back in the days when Shun was still trying to make a name for himself.
“It’s a pleasure to finally meet you,” Mimi said with a charming smile, “Jin has told me how much he values your input.”
“I look forward to seeing what you’ve come up with.”
Jin scolded the pulses tightening across his forehead and told them to be quiet. Yes, everything depended on this show. And yes, there was something even more important than LilyZ that needed to be resolved inside of him. He’d thought everything to death. It was time for action.
He greeted all the retailers as they arrived to the studio and took their seats. On cue, the lighting technician dimmed the overheads, and began to flash the red and gold beams that announced Mimi’s theme of a modern take on traditional designs with Chinese influence. The catchy music combined contemporary beats with ancient Chinese instruments and melodies.
They’d decided not to do a catwalk given there were only a handful of pieces, so instead the models came in from all four corners of the space and walked around in groupings.
As Mimi had intended, the clothes were cut in two different sizes with models chosen accordingly, who came close enough to the guests as to let them really see the fabric and hang of the clothes. Jin could tell from the buzz in the room that the new designs were being received favorably. His heart swelled with pride for Mimi, who rose to this occasion like he knew she would. His wife was a remarkable woman whose name would someday be known in the fashion world and beyond.
His Convenient New York Bride Page 14
