More time with Zev? Yes, please. That little warning voice in her head was drowned out by the pure enjoyment of being with him. “Now you’ve piqued my curiosity.”
“Say you’ll stay and hang out with me, Carls. Give us a chance.”
He said it so earnestly, she wanted to blurt out, I’ll stay! But she fell back into one of their games, because she missed those, too, and they had always made her happy, just like Zev. “Milk race? If you win, I’ll stay.” When they were younger, they’d race to see who could drink the milk from their cereal bowls the fastest, and Zev always won.
“You’re on.”
They picked up their bowls, and she said, “One.” Zev said, “Two,” and they both said, “Three,” and lifted their bowls to their lips, guzzling the sugary milk. Milk dripped down their chins, and Zev finished in seconds. He pushed to his feet and hollered, “Yes!” causing Bandit to jump up and bark.
Carly put her bowl on the table, and Zev swept her into his arms, kissing her hard, milk mustache and all. “You’re mine tonight, baby!”
“Oh, darn. Guess I have no choice but to endure a few more hours with you.”
“You played me like a fiddle, and it makes you even hotter. Come on, beautiful,” he said as he grabbed the bowls. “Let’s clean up these dishes, check on the chickens, and then I’ll show you your surprise.”
“Surprise? So, we’re going where you wanted to take me earlier?”
“Nope. We’ll have to do that tomorrow,” he said as they headed inside.
They washed the bowls and then they headed out to check on the chickens. Bandit led them down a path through the woods. The scents of pine and fresh earth hung in the air. They joked around and talked, sharing so many delicious kisses, Carly wanted to skip the surprise and drag him up to the suite. But at the same time, she was loving every second of just being with Zev. He was interesting and funny, telling her stories about his travels and about searching for the Pride. His passionate descriptions made her feel like she was right there with him, hiking, surfing, and diving in the deep blue sea.
They headed back through the woods to the inn, and when a flock of birds took flight from the tops of the trees, Bandit bolted ahead.
Zev slung an arm over Carly’s shoulder and said, “It feels kind of like old times, only better.”
“Because we’ve cleared the air?”
“Probably. Guilt is a ravenous beast.”
“So are you,” she said softly.
A low laugh rumbled out of his lips as he pushed a branch out of the way so she could pass through to the grassy field in front of the Sterling House. Three gorgeous stories of glass, stone, and cedar and grand terraces made the stately inn look rustic and elegant at once.
“This place is so pretty. Everyone in town is thrilled that Char and Beau are reopening the inn.”
“Is this what you’d like to have one day? Land, animals? A peaceful life in the mountains?”
It was a good question. “To be honest, I haven’t thought in terms of one day for a very long time.”
“I can’t imagine that. You were such a dreamer. Your dreams fed mine.”
“Funny, I always thought yours fed mine.”
“Maybe it was both, and maybe you should think about what you want out of life,” he said lightly.
Asking herself that question would be anything but light. All she’d ever wanted when they were together was to travel the world with him, going from one adventure to the next, discovering things about each other and different cultures along the way. Did she still want that? She certainly still wanted him.
“What do you want, Zev?” she asked as they walked around the side of the inn. “Are you happy traveling and living in your van or on your boat? Not having one place to call home?”
“That’s a loaded question. You know what home feels like to me.”
Remembering his sweet words, she said, “Me.”
“Exactly. I love seeing the world and not knowing what tomorrow will hold. I love the thrill of trying to find what other people think is lost forever and getting up one morning and reading about something across the country and then getting on a plane and going to see it, just so I don’t miss out. I love the work I do, babe, just like you do.”
“I can hear that.”
“I don’t know if I could ever do what you did and stay in one place for very long. I mean, look at where I’m sleeping. I get restless if I’m confined. You of all people know that. Hell, you used to be that way, too.”
Even when they’d gone off to college and could sleep in each other’s dorm rooms, they’d still go on midnight adventures. The outdoors had been such a huge draw to both of them, it wasn’t unusual for one of them to wake up the other at two in the morning and say, Let’s go explore. Goose bumps rose on Carly’s arms. She missed those times. But they couldn’t have stayed like that forever. Eventually real life would have gotten in the way. At least that’s what she’d told herself on the rare occasion she’d allowed herself to think about what their lives would be like together.
“That’s true,” she said. “But after Mexico, the safety of knowing what tomorrow held was what saved me.”
“I can see that,” he said as they came to the backyard. “I’m sorry, but I can’t wrap my head around you not craving the excitement or the unstoppable need to explore. It seemed like it ran through your veins, like it does mine. You really don’t miss lying beneath the stars planning trips to all the places you want to see?”
Hearing the enthusiasm in the voice of the man with whom she’d wanted those things made the longing she’d spent a decade repressing force itself up to the surface.
“I’d be lying if I said I don’t miss it sometimes. I just don’t think about it because I don’t think I’d give up my life here for it. This is my home now.” As she said it, worry trampled through her. Was she driving a stake between them? Even if she was, he needed to know that she wasn’t the dreamer she’d once been. She might be jumping in with both feet to this gift of a week and rediscovering parts of herself she’d missed, but she still had to maintain a foothold in reality. Their lives were in very different places now. At the end of their time together, Zev would go back to his life, and she’d have to shuck the rediscovered pieces of herself like old husks and fall back into her overly scheduled, though enjoyable, safe life once again.
“And it’s a beautiful place to call home,” he said, snapping her from her thoughts. He waved at the majestic mountains, the glistening lake, and the wedding tent, which looked even prettier in the starlight. Suddenly he laughed and splayed his hands up toward the sky. “I finally get it!”
“Get what?”
“I have been wondering why the universe chose now to bring us back together, and I think I just figured it out,” he said excitedly. “You need me.”
She rolled her eyes. “As if I didn’t need you all those years ago?”
“That was a different type of need. I think the universe knew what we didn’t. We both needed to grow up in order to heal and become the adults we were meant to be. And yeah, it sucked to be apart. It was excruciating, but I know I’m a better person for it. I think before I act, and I’m aware of all of my faults, of which there are many. And you’re stronger and even more self-confident. You’re smarter than I’ll ever be, Carls, and you’ve proven that you don’t need me in the way we used to need each other.”
“But you just said I need you now.”
“You do, but in a different way. And I need you, too, but not in that old way, either. You’ve started seeing life as this regimented, clearly defined, black-and-white element, and I’m here to remind you that the life you’ve created is not at risk of falling apart if you add a little glow and color outside the lines sometimes.”
“Okay. I can see that,” she admitted. “But you’re living our dream. Why would you need me right now?”
He took her hand, leading her toward the tent, and said, “I don’t have that answer yet beyond the obvi
ous, that I have loved you forever and my life is a lonely, half-fulfilling dream without you in it. But we’ve got this week to figure it out, and I’m sure the answer will become clear. Starting with a little reminder about where it all began.” He stopped at the entrance to the tent, which was dark, and pulled his phone from his pocket. “Bear with me a sec.” He did something on his phone, uttered a curse, then said, “Got it!”
He tapped something on the screen, and all of the sparkling lights inside the tent lit up. Carly’s heart nearly stopped at the sight of Charlotte’s enormous round wicker daybed covered with blankets and several big, fluffy pillows in the middle of the tent and an enormous movie screen where the dance floor had been. Beside the bed, a projector and a laptop sat atop a table. An old-fashioned popcorn machine and a variety of fruits, nuts, candies, and granola bars—all the things Carly and Zev used to munch on while watching movies—sat atop a large table off to the side. Bottles of water, juice, and champagne bobbed in a cooler full of water.
“Zevy…?” she said breathlessly. “This is amazing. I thought you said they didn’t come to take down the tent.”
“That wasn’t exactly true. They did, but I asked them to leave it up. I wanted to surprise you.” He put a hand on her lower back, leading her into the tent.
“You definitely succeeded at that. I’m awestruck. When did you have time to do all of this?”
“Nick helped me set it up after everyone went to sleep Saturday night.”
“Nick?” Remembering that it was Nick who had given Zev advice about kissing her, she said, “He must think all we ever do is make out.”
“Actually, he gave me a hard time, just like he did the first time I went to him. He lectured me about treating you right and told me that I’d better not hurt you this time, or I’d have him to deal with.”
“Wow, really? He comes across as such a player. I wouldn’t think he’d care so much.”
Zev shook his head. “I’m sure Nick does his fair share of playing, but he’s always watched out for you. I never told you about how he caught me stealing Beau’s condoms the first time you and I wanted to hook up.”
“No way!” she said with a laugh.
“Oh yes. He took the ones I stole and gave me a lecture about what it means to have sex with a girl. He told me not to be a dick afterward or to run my mouth about it, that kind of thing. And then he told me that if I was mature enough to have sex with a girl, I was old enough to buy my own condoms to protect her.”
“Seriously?”
“Yup. And that’s not all. He wanted me to take complete responsibility, so he drove me to the drugstore to make sure I didn’t take the ‘pussy way out’ and order them online.”
“Oh my gosh. Are you kidding?” She laughed. “I guess I owe Nick a thank-you, too.” She hooked her fingers into his belt loops and said, “Thank you for doing all of that and for going to all of this trouble for us.” She glanced at the movie screen, and then it dawned on her when he’d set it up. “Wait a second. You did this Saturday night? After the wedding?”
“Yeah. Everyone left Sunday morning, and I didn’t want the others to know and make a big deal out of it in case you blew me off. Beau knew I wanted to borrow the movie projector and screen, but he never asked why.”
She took a step back and said, “That’s very presumptuous, to think I’d jump into bed with you.”
“First of all, I didn’t do it so we could have sex. There’s a whole inn for that. I did it so we could watch The Goonies and Indiana Jones, your two favorite movies. I thought it would be cool to hang out like old times.”
“Oh,” she whispered, feeling silly.
He grabbed her shirt, tugging her slowly into his arms, and said, “You, my sexy seductress, are the one who got me naked this afternoon, remember?”
“Who, me?” she said, feigning innocence.
He kissed her softly. “Don’t even pretend that you didn’t want to tear my clothes off when you saw me at the wedding. We practically combusted the second we saw each other.”
“Oh, you think so, do you?” she said sassily.
“Hell yes. There was no hiding the lust in your eyes.”
“Dream on, Braden—”
He grabbed her ribs, tickling her. She shrieked.
“Stop!” she said through her giggles.
“Admit it!” Tickle, tickle. “You wanted me!”
She twisted free and ran away laughing. “I did not want you!”
“You wanted every inch of me!” he countered, chasing her around the daybed. He caught her around the middle and tackled her onto the mattress, tickling her into hysterical giggles. “Admit it!”
“No!” She tried to roll away, but he trapped her hands, pressing them into the mattress, straddling her waist.
“Admit it,” he said with a wicked glimmer in his eyes.
She shook her head, trying not to laugh.
He dipped his head, brushing his nose over hers, and said, “You wanted me then, and you want me now.” He trailed kisses across her cheek to her ear and slicked his tongue along the shell.
The air left her lungs in a rush.
“I can feel it even if you don’t say it,” he said huskily into her ear.
He kissed her earlobe, then nipped it just hard enough to send pinpricks of pleasure rippling down her body.
“Zevy,” she pleaded, their eyes locking. “Kiss me.”
As he lowered his lips toward hers, he whispered, “Say you want me.”
He didn’t give her time to answer. The press of his lips was surprisingly gentle, a caress of a kiss, with long, slow sweeps of his tongue. It was the type of kiss grandmothers reminisced about and young girls dreamed of. A kiss that transported them to far-off places with white knights and glamorous castles. Carly had never dreamed of white knights. She’d dreamed of Zevy in hiking boots or a wet suit, and the closest her dreams came to castles were the old and ivy-covered ones, empty save for ghosts of years past, where she and Zev could explore. He was a master explorer, as proven by the way he was currently exploring her mouth, his tongue running over the smooth ridges of her teeth. He drew out their pleasure, releasing her hands and cradling her beneath him, kissing her so exquisitely, the voice in her head whispered, Be careful, but her heart pounded out a much louder message, Let go…
And she did, abandoning all thought and letting his kisses carry her to those far-off places full of colors and lights, deserts and oceans. A world full of hopes and possibilities. When their lips finally parted, she instantly mourned the loss, leaning up for more.
“Tell me, Carls,” he whispered. “I need to hear it.”
She tried to remember the last thing they’d said. It wasn’t the words that came back to her first, but the imploring, loving look in his eyes, the same one that was gazing down at her now, and his words followed, Say you want me. Her heart was beating so fast, there was no holding back the truth. “I never stopped wanting you.”
His head dropped beside hers, as if the words had offered the relief he needed. He kissed her cheek, then gazed into her eyes again and said, “Say you’ll stay with me tonight.”
“There’s no place I’d rather be.”
Chapter Eleven
ZEV HAD WOKEN to the sounds of the sea and colorful sunrises in exotic locations all over the world, but none compared to waking up to the crow of the roosters while lying in a simple wedding tent with Carly Dylan sleeping naked and safe in his arms. He’d been awake for hours reveling in their closeness. They’d slept together nearly every night their first year of college, and he’d thought he’d never be able to sleep without her again. He’d run himself ragged in his travels, chasing fatigue, but no matter how exhausted he was, the minute he’d closed his eyes, Carly was front and center in his dreams. But last night he’d slept harder in the few hours after they’d made love than he ever had before, and while Carly was still the star of his every thought, she was also finally his reality.
They had five more days toge
ther. He had four more nights to hold her, love her, and to try to earn her trust. She loved him. He was certain of that, even if she was holding the words in. But he understood her worries. He just needed to figure out what to do about them.
The Pride was supposed to be their discovery, and even though he’d been elated with what he hoped would prove to be a history-making find, he’d been honest when he’d said he wasn’t fulfilled. But he couldn’t be a white-picket fence guy any more than Carly could give up the life she’d worked so hard to create. He needed answers that could only come with time. He just hoped five days was enough to show her that they were worth holding on to until they figured it out.
Bandit, asleep on the ground beside the daybed, lifted his head from his paws, his ears standing up. He’d woken with the roosters, too, and he’d gone to check things out, ambling back into the tent a long while later and falling right back to sleep. Zev was getting used to having Bandit following him around like a shadow, checking on the chickens, and jumping into the truck whenever he opened the door. But he didn’t think he’d ever get used to having his shit stolen.
“Hey, buddy, what’s the matter?” Zev whispered. He didn’t dare reach out to pet him for fear of waking Carly.
Bandit jumped to his feet and ran out of the tent, probably in search of more stuff to steal. At least he couldn’t get into any of Zev’s things since the doors to the inn were closed. That reminded him that Bandit had stolen Carly’s shirt, and he made a mental note to look for it.
Bandit barked in the distance, rousing Carly, who snuggled into his side. She made a sleepy sound and pressed a sweet kiss to his chest. She lifted her face, a sleepy smile curving her lips.
“Morning, babe.” Zev kissed her.
He ran his hand down her back, resting it on the curve at the base of her spine. Last night he’d given that sexy spot extra-special attention. She’d always been ticklish there, and he’d enjoyed making her squirm almost as much as he’d enjoyed loving his way up her spine, kissing every vertebra, and lavishing the back of her shoulders and neck with openmouthed kisses as she writhed beneath him, rubbing her ass against his cock. He was getting hard just thinking about how she’d risen on her hands and knees and he’d loved her from behind until they’d collapsed into each other’s arms.
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