The Green Mouse

by Robert W. Chambers

  IX

  A CROSS-TOWN CAR

  _Concerning the Sudden Madness of One Brown_

  As the two young fellows, carrying their suitcases, emerged from thesubway at Times Square into the midsummer glare and racket of Broadwayand Forty-second Street, Brown suddenly halted, pressed his hand to hisforehead, gazed earnestly up at the sky as though trying to recollect howto fly, then abruptly gripped Smith's left arm just above the elbow andsqueezed it, causing the latter gentleman exquisite discomfort.

  "Here! Stop it!" protested Smith, wriggling with annoyance.

  Brown only gazed at him and then at the sky.

  "Stop it!" repeated Smith, astonished. "Why do you pinch me and then lookat the sky? Is--is a monoplane attempting to alight on me? _What_ is thematter with you, anyway?"

  "That peculiar consciousness," said Brown, dreamily, "is creeping overme. Don't move--don't speak--don't interrupt me, Smith."

  "Let go of me!" retorted Smith.

  "Hush! Wait! It's certainly creeping over me."

  "What's creeping over you?"

  "You know what I mean. I am experiencing that strange feeling that all--er--all _this_--has happened before."

  "All what?--confound it!"

  "All _this!_ My standing, on a hot summer day, in the infernal din ofsome great city; and--and I seem to recall it vividly--after a fashion--the blazing sun, the stifling odor of the pavements; I seem to rememberthat very hackman over there sponging the nose of his horse--even thatpushcart piled up with peaches! Smith! What is this maddeningly elusivememory that haunts me--haunts me with the peculiar idea that it has alloccurred before?... Do you know what I mean?"

  "I've just admitted to you that everybody has that sort of fidgetoccasionally, and there's no reason to stand on your hindlegs about it.Come on or we'll miss our train."

  But Beekman Brown remained stock still, his youthful and attractivefeatures puckered in a futile effort to seize the evanescent memoriesthat came swarming--gnatlike memories that teased and distracted.

  "It's as if the entire circumstances were strangely familiar," he said;"as though everything that you and I do and say had once before been doneand said by us under precisely similar conditions--somewhere--sometime."

  "We'll miss that boat at the foot of Forty-second Street," cut in Smithimpatiently. "And if we miss the boat we lose our train."

  Brown gazed skyward.

  "I never felt this feeling so strongly in all my life," he muttered;"it's--it's astonishing. Why, Smith, I _knew_ you were going to saythat."

  "Say what?" demanded Smith.

  "That we would miss the boat and the train. Isn't it funny?"

  "Oh, very. I'll say it again sometime if it amuses you; but, meanwhile,as we're going to that week-end at the Carringtons we'd better get into ataxi and hustle for the foot of West Forty-second Street. Is thereanything very funny in that?"

  "I knew _that_, too. I knew you'd say we must take a taxi!" insistedBrown, astonished at his own "clairvoyance."

  "Now, look here," retorted Smith, thoroughly vexed; "up to five minutesago you were reasonable. What the devil's the matter with you, BeekmanBrown?"

  "James Vanderdynk Smith, I don't know. Good Heavens! I knew you weregoing to say that to me, and that I was going to answer that way!"

  "Are you coming or are you going to talk foolish on this broilingcurbstone the rest of the afternoon?" inquired Smith, fiercely.

  "Jim, I tell you that everything we've done and said in the last fiveminutes we have done and said before--somewhere--perhaps on some otherplanet; perhaps centuries ago when you and I were Romans and woretogas----"

  "Confound it! What do I care," shouted Smith, "whether we were Romans andwore togas? We are due this century at a house party on this planet. Theyexpect us on this train. Are you coming? If not--kindly relax thatcrablike clutch on my elbow before partial paralysis ensues."

  "Smith, wait! I tell you this is somehow becoming strangely portentous.I've got the funniest sensation that something is going to happen to me."

  "It will," said Smith, dangerously, "if you don't let go my elbow."

  But Beekman Brown, a prey to increasing excitement, clung to his friend.

  "Wait just one moment, Jim; something remarkable is likely to occur! I--Inever before felt this way--so strongly--in all my life. Somethingextraordinary is certainly about to happen to me."

  "It has happened," said his friend, coldly; "you've gone dippy. Also,we've lost that train. Do you understand?"

  "I knew we would. Isn't that curious? I--I believe I can almost tell youwhat else is going to happen to us."

  "_I'll_ tell _you_," hissed Smith; "it's an ambulance for yours and ding-dong to the funny-house! _What_ are you trying to do now?" With realmisgiving, for Brown, balanced on the edge of the gutter, began wavinghis arms in a birdlike way as though about to launch himself into aerialflight across Forty-second Street.

  "The car!" he exclaimed excitedly, "the cherry-colored cross-town car!Where is it? Do you see it anywhere, Smith?"

  "What? What do you mean? There's no cross-town car in sight. Brown, don'tact like that! Don't be foolish! What on earth----"

  "It's coming! There's a car coming!" cried Brown.

  "Do you think you're a racing runabout and I'm a curve?"

  Brown waved him away impatiently.

  "I tell you that something most astonishing is going to occur--in acherry-colored tram car.... And somehow there'll be some reason for me toget into it."

  "Into what?"

  "Into that cherry-colored car, because--because--there'll be a wickerbasket in it--somebody holding a wicker basket--and there'll be--there'llbe--a--a--white summer gown--and a big white hat----"

  Smith stared at his friend in grief and amazement. Brown stood balancinghimself on the gutter's edge, pale, rapt, uttering incoherent prophecyconcerning the advent of a car not yet visible anywhere in the immediatemetropolitan vista.

  "Old man," began Smith with emotion, "I think you had better come veryquietly somewhere with me. I--I want to show you something pretty andnice."

  "Hark!" exclaimed Brown.

  "Sure, I'll hark for you," said Smith, soothingly, "or I'll bark for youif you like, or anything if you'll just come quietly."

  "The cherry-colored car!" cried Brown, laboring under tremendous emotion."Look, Smithy! That is the car!"

  "Sure, it is! I see it, old man. They run 'em every five minutes. Whatthe devil is there to astonish anybody about a cross-town cruiser with ared water line?"

  "Look!" insisted Brown, now almost beside himself. "The wicker basket!The summer gown! Exactly as I foretold it! The big straw hat!--the--the_girl!_"

  And shoving Smith violently away he galloped after the cherry-coloredcar, caught it, swung himself aboard, and sank triumphant and breathlessinto the transverse seat behind that occupied by a wicker basket, a filmysummer frock, a big, white straw hat, and--a girl--the most amazinglypretty girl he had ever laid eyes on. After him, headlong, like adistracted chicken, rushed Smith and alighted beside him, panting,menacing.

  "Wha'--dyeh--board--this--car--for!" he gasped, sliding fiercely upbeside Brown. "Get off or I'll drag you off!"

  But Brown only shook his head with an infatuated smile.

  "Is it that girl?" said Smith, incensed. "Are you a--a Broadway Don Juan,or are you a respectable lawyer with a glimmering sense of common decencyand an intention to keep a social engagement at the Carringtons' to-day?"

  And Smith drew out his timepiece and flourished it furiously underBrown's handsome and sun-tanned nose.

  But Brown only slid along the seat away from him, saying:

  "Don't bother me, Jim; this is too momentous a crisis in my life to havea well-intentioned but intellectually dwarfed friend butting into me andrunning about under foot."

  "Intellectually d-d--do you mean _me?_" asked Smith, unable to believehis ears. "_Do_ you?"

  "Yes, I do! Because a miracle suddenly happens to me on Forty-secondStreet, and you, with yo
ur mind of a stockbroker, unable to appreciateit, come clattering and clamoring after me about a house party--a common-place, every-day, social appointment, when I have a full-blown miracle onmy hands!"

  "What miracle?" faltered Smith, stupefied.

  "What miracle? Haven't I been telling you that I've been having thatqueer sense that all this has happened before? Didn't I suddenly begin--as though compelled by some unseen power--to foretell things? Didn't Iprophesy the coming of this cross-town car? Didn't I even name its colorbefore it came into sight? Didn't I warn you that I'd probably get intoit? Didn't I reveal to you that a big straw hat and a pretty summergown----"

  "Confound it!" almost shouted Smith, "There are about five thousandcherry-colored cross-town cars in this town. There are about five millionwhite hats and dresses in this borough. There are five billion girlswearing 'em----!" "Yes; but the _wicker basket_" breathed Brown. "How doyou account for _that?_... And, anyway, you annoy me, Smith. Why don'tyou get out of the car and go somewhere?"

  "I want to know where you are going before I knock your head off."

  "I don't know," replied Brown, serenely.

  "Are you actually attempting to follow that girl?" whispered Smith,horrified.

  "Yes.... It sounds low, doesn't it? But it really isn't. It is somethingI can't explain--you couldn't understand even if I tried to enlightenyou. The sentiment I harbor is too lofty for some to comprehend, toovague, too pure, too ethereal for----"

  "I'm as lofty and ethereal as you are!" retorted Smith, hotly. "And Iknow a--an ethereal Lothario when I see him, too!"

  "I'm not--though it looks like it--and I forgive you, Smithy, for losingyour temper and using such language."

  "Oh, you do?" said Smith, grinning with rage.

  "Yes," nodded Brown, kindly. "I forgive you, but don't call me thatagain. You mean well, but I'm going to find out at last what all thismaddening, tantalizing, unexplained and mysterious feeling that it allhas occurred before really is. I'm going to trace it to its source; I'mgoing to compare notes with this highly intelligent girl."

  "You're going to _speak_ to her?"

  "I am. I must. How else can I compare data."

  "I hope she'll call the police. If she doesn't _I_ will."

  "Don't worry. She's part of this strange situation. She'll comprehend assoon as I begin to explain. She is intelligent; you only have to look ather to understand that."

  Smith choking with impotent fury, nevertheless ventured a swift glance.Her undeniable beauty only exasperated him. "To think--to _think_," heburst out, "that a modest, decent, law-loving business man like me shouldsuddenly awake to find his boyhood friend had turned into a godlessvotary of Venus!"

  "I'm not a votary of Venus!" retorted Brown, turning pink. "I'll punchyou if you say it again. I'm as decent and respectable a business man asyou are! And my grammar is better. And, thank Heaven! I've intellectenough to recognize a miracle when it happens to me.... Do you think I amcapable of harboring any sentiments that might bring the blush ofcoquetry to the cheek of modesty? Do you?"

  "Well--well, _I_ don't know what you're up to!" Smith raised his voice inbewilderment and despair. "I don't know what possesses you to act thisway. People don't experience miracles in New York cross-town cars. Thewildest stretch of imagination could only make a coincidence out of this.There are trillions of girls in cross-town cars dressed just like thisone."

  "But the basket!"

  "Another coincidence. There are quadrillions of wicker baskets."

  "Not," said Brown, "with the contents of this one."

  "Why not?"

  Smith instinctively turned to look at the basket balanced daintily on thegirl's knees.

  He strove to penetrate its wicker exterior with concentrated gaze. Hecould see nothing but wicker.

  "Well," he began angrily, "what _is_ in that basket? And how do _you_know it--you lunatic?"

  "Will you believe me if I tell you?"

  "If you can offer any corroborative evidence----"

  "Well, then--there's a cat in that basket."

  "A--what?"

  "A cat."

  "How do you know?"

  "I don't know how I know, but there's a big, gray cat in that basket."

  "Why a _gray_ one?"

  "I can't tell, but it _is_ gray, and it has six toes on every foot."

  Smith truly felt that he was now being trifled with.

  "Brown," he said, trying to speak civilly, "if anybody in the fiveboroughs had come to me with affidavits and told me yesterday how youwere going to behave this morning----"

  His voice, rising unconsciously as the realization of his outrageouswrongs dawned upon him, rang out above the rattle and grinding of thecar, and the girl turned abruptly and looked straight at him and then atBrown.

  The pure, fearless beauty of the gaze, the violet eyes widening a littlein surprise, silenced both young men.

  She inspected Brown for an instant, then turned serenely to her calmcontemplation of the crowded street once more. Yet her dainty, close-setears looked as though they were listening.

  The young men gazed at one another.

  "That girl is well bred," said Smith in a low, agitated voice. "You--youwouldn't think of venturing to speak to her!"

  "I'm obliged to, I tell you! This all happened before. I recognizeeverything as it occurs.... Even to your making a general nuisance ofyourself."

  Smith straightened up.

  "I'm going to push you forcibly from this car. Do you remember _that_incident?"

  "The lid of the basket tilted a little. Then a plaintivevoice said 'Meow-w'."]

  "No," said Brown with conviction, "that incident did not happen. You onlythreatened to do it. I remember now."

  In spite of himself Smith felt a slight chill creep up over his neck andinconvenience his spine.

  He said, deeply agitated: "What a terrible position for me to be in--witha friend suddenly gone mad in the streets of New York and running after abasket containing what he believes to be a cat. A _Cat!_ Good----"

  Brown gripped his arm. "Watch it!" he breathed.

  The lid of the basket tilted a little, between lid and rim a soft, furry,six-toed gray paw was thrust out. Then a plaintive voice said, "Meow-w!"