The Way Things Seem

by Mackey Chandler

  The price was reasonable and in sudden fit of caution he paid cash. Before he went back to his spot he looked through the store. He bought a small apple pie and a can of stew. They had fabric chairs on a folding metal frame, like a Hardoy chair but with a high back. That seemed a nice idea to be able to sit outside, so he got that and two towels and wash cloths. Every time he thought about it he seemed to find something new to buy.

  Later he was sitting outside in the chair, reading the owner’s manual when a thin older man walked up.

  “My Mrs. says you would use some help with your new home. I’m John.” He looked critically at the owner’s manual and wrinkled up his nose. “Those are generally pretty useless.”

  “It certainly is, almost as bad as the Ingrish instructions to assemble a Chinese bicycle.”

  “If you can read German get the European version or better yet the factory service manual,” John said. “It’s expensive and probably will tell you four times as much as you wanted to know. But it can be a lifesaver when you break down to be able to hand it to a service technician. Even if he can’t read German the pictures will let you puzzle out most of it. It’ll have a disk version in the back too.”

  “If it has the manual on disk I can run it through a translation site and get the English,” David said.

  “There ya go. I hadn’t thought of that,” John said. He explained all sorts of things to David, showing him shut-offs and controls the salesman hadn’t.

  “If you want to put off filling your black and grey water tanks you’re welcome to use the showers, middle of this lane,” he said, waving. “They’re cleaner than most, but bring your own towel and soap.”

  David thanked him and he went nodded and walked away. He’d never offered to shake hands and his wife had never offered her first name much less her surname. But oddly he didn’t take it for a snub. They just seemed very reserved. The helpfulness certainly made up for it. David just relaxed and gave up on the manual. Pretty much everything he’d been trying to look up John covered.

  When he got hungry he tried out his little stove, searing a steak in butter and scrambling some eggs in the remaining butter. There wasn’t any exhaust fan and it made a haze. No wonder he’d seen some grills outside other motor homes. The plastic knives were useless and he ended up eating it by hand after it cooled down enough. Then he didn’t have any napkins or paper towels, so he cleaned his hands on one of his new wash cloths. Back to the little store he walked and bought a paring knife, two big rolls of paper towels and a bottle of dishwashing soap. Before he could pay for that he saw flip-flops and realized they would be perfect to wear in a public shower. That reminded him to buy a pump bottle of hand soap. They had a real little gold mine here, David reflected, leaving with a full bag.

  It was twilight by the time he put his things away. David returned to his chair outside. There was a gentle breeze blowing and if there were mosquitoes around that seemed to keep them at bay. If not, he was sure the park’s little store had repellant. It seemed to have every other necessity of mobile life. A couple swallows flitted by finding some kind of bug to intercept even if none were bothering him. A big black bird landed on the power line running down his lane and got his instant attention. It had a bright false color glow about it that made David think of green. Could such a thing be natural? It wasn’t at all like the normal faint false colors around other birds and small creatures like squirrels and rabbits.

  Was he paranoid or was the bird actually looking at him? It made David think of the drones and robotic spy bots that were a staple of his business. Could a biological entity be co-opted and controlled with the sort of forces Uncle taught him? He’d never hinted at any such thing to David, yet perhaps he would find that repugnant and the sort of things wizards would do. It reminded him vaguely of the way Halloween decorations associated cats with witches. That was superstitious rubbish, wasn’t it?

  He didn’t really know a blackbird from a raven, crow or starling, especially in dim light looking up at it on a power line. The park lady with all her bird decorations could probably identify it at a glance. The thought occurred to him to kill it just in case it was some nefarious agent, but he really didn’t approve of killing something that casually. He didn’t intend to eat crow in the very literal sense. The bird solved his moral dilemma by taking wing and flying off out of sight.

  It wasn’t long after the bird left and he could make out stars in the darkening sky that he was ready to go to bed. The night was pleasant enough to sleep with the windows open to screens and let the breeze blow through. The bed was as nice as any he’d have gotten at a hotel, but there was no pillow. He wasn’t about to go see if they had any at the camp store. One of his rolls of paper towels rolled in a bath towel served just fine.

  There was an early morning rush of people leaving that woke David up. After the exodus it got quiet again. The folks who were staying several days didn’t seem in any hurry to stir around. David decided to go shower using their facilities, because one thing he remembered from last night’s instructions was he had to actually light the water heater and he hadn’t seen any need of it yet.

  David made sure a change of clothing had no labels still hanging on them and put those in a handle bag with his wallet, phone, soap and the towel that hadn’t served as his pillow. He carried the thongs only planning on wearing them in the shower. The showers were individual stalls for privacy with a bench to get dressed and hooks on the wall to hold your things. The grate on the floor was wooden slates criss-crossed, still wet from the previous user. He was happy not to stand on them directly. The flow wasn’t going to knock you down, but it could be set decently warm. His shower in the motor home probably had one of those low flow heads that barely drizzled on you.

  There was a commotion outside with loud voices, and then a siren in the distance getting closer. David went ahead and finished his shower. He’d have to put dirty things back on or put clean things on without showering to satisfy his curiosity. When he came out there were people standing in clumps here and there, staring down the lane. It wasn’t until he was half way back to his lot he realized they were staring at his motor home. When he got closer he looked up. The same big bird with its false color halo was on the line staring at the Mercedes just like the people. That was no coincidence.

  David didn’t want to create a spectacle again with a fireball, so he reached out and removed heat from the bird until it had a white coat of frost and he was sure it had to be dead. It was still perched there, but feet frozen in place around the line. He didn’t feel the least bit of regret now, just that he hadn’t given in to his misgivings and done this yesterday.

  The park owners were standing watching the firefighter foam the vehicle down. It was sitting on the ground already, tires consumed. The glass was all gone and the sides sagging in, an empty shell. When David walked up behind the lady owner, whose name he never had gotten, she turned her head and saw him. She grabbed John’s sleeve and gave it a vigorous shake. She appeared too surprised at David's appearance to say anything to him.

  When he looked back the same direction she was, John’s face registered the same sort of shock. David kept walking and joined them, reached out and put a hand on their shoulders, drawing them in.

  “Do the firemen think I’m still in there?” David asked.

  “They sure do. That’s the first thing they asked, was how many people in that motor home. I thought you were in there,” John said. “They axed the door latch and tried to go it, but the flames just gushed out.

  “Do me a favor," David asked. "I’m afraid I have some very bad New York people who want to harm me. I thought I was clear of them, but apparently not. Tell the firemen I was in the shower and I’ll speak with them in your office if they want, but not to make any public announcement about who or how many were in that fire. It might save my life to not let these people know they failed to kill me. The vehicle is insured and I’ll make sure you don’t take any loss from damages to your site and hook-u
ps.”

  “These firemen are all local boys we know, volunteers, and they’ll listen to us. I’ll try to make sure they understand it might do you harm. I don’t figure anybody will be surprised if they wait a day or two to let it cool down and go through the debris before making any statements. This is the weirdest damn thing that has happened around here in a long time,” John said.

  Above, the thin feet of the bird thawed enough to loosen its grip and let it rotate on the line. It fell to the pavement right in front of the three of them, still covered solid in white frost. It hit with a sharp crack and bounce that made it obvious it was as hard as a bowling ball. They all just stared it.

  David couldn’t think of anything plausible to say.

  “OK,” John allowed, “second weirdest thing.”

  The Fire Captain was surprisingly young. He listened to David’s story of having bad actors after him with visible skepticism. He seemed encouraged David could give him a concrete address and phone numbers for his company in Atlanta, so he couldn’t just disappear and claim he had nothing to do with the matter. When David explained what his company did it helped. The Captain was ex-military and respected people who did defense work.

  “So these people who might want to do you harm, what are they? Mafia? Foreigners?” he asked.

  “I’m not sure,” David admitted. “I don’t have a name for them. But one I actually got to talk to spoke of them being families. If that’s not Mafia it sounds similar. And I was laughed at by another when I spoke of going to the police because he said his boss owned the police.”

  The Captain, who had a very low opinion of anything to do with big cities full of corruption, found all that very persuasive. Especially since David didn’t act self-important and claim to know everything.

  “I’ll wait a couple days to make a report,” he promised. “Not least because if there are people still looking for you, a few days delay will make sure they don’t come snooping around, bothering John and Erma. We watch out for them, though anybody who messes with them is likely to find themselves on the wrong end of a twelve gauge full of buckshot.”

  “I didn’t have John pegged for the type,” David admitted.

  “You’re right. John is a pussycat. Erma is the no-nonsense sort to take care of business.”

  * * *

  David had Erma call the closest car rental to bring a car out. They were again willing to send somebody on her say-so because they were locals and knew her. He wanted to be well away before his rental went on the data nets.

  “Thank you,” David said when the rental car pulled up. “In the unlikely event I ever own a motor home again I’d be happy to come here again.”

  “That sweet of you, but if it all the same to you, there’s a couple of fine places just a little bit further west into Pennsylvania that I’d recommend. Even if it isn’t any fault of yours it seems like there is just too much excitement that seems to follow you around,” Erma said.

  “No offense taken,” David said. “I can see how you’d feel that way.”

  * * *

  “The bird is dead,” McDonnell’s best handler said.

  “Of course, but not Carpenter,” Vince said with grim certainty.

  “Well I can’t tell you that. It happened so fast the bird couldn’t report. The bird was just there one instant and gone the next. I’ve had a bird shot before, but you still knew something happened briefly,” the handler said, “enough to have an idea what happened.”

  “He nuked the sucker just like Boris,” Vince guessed. “I bet Boris didn’t feel being vaporized.”

  “There’s something you should know about that,” the handler said, unhappy.

  Vince’s face said he wasn’t about to beg for the information.

  “The NYPD has shared sensors pods on the light poles. They do faces, license scans, and gun-shot triangulation. They host some stuff for Homeland Security too. The one nearest Boris when he was taken out showed a neutron pulse. It kind of freaked them out because it was the sort you associate with a fusion event. It worries them sick that terrorists might get nukes some day.”

  “That’s like what an H-bomb does, right?” Vince asked. “Where was there any hydrogen to fuse?”

  “I suspect that was Boris himself. People are mostly water you know.”

  “Oh great, he didn’t just nuke him,” Vince said, “he thermo-nuked him.”

  * * *

  David drove west, stopped and used his new electrical skills to burn out the antenna for the satellite system, then doubled back south east to DC. The rental transaction would show on the data nets, just like his purchasing the motor home did, apparently way too fast if that was how they tracked him. David had a plan to deal with that this time. He drove around until the neighbor hood looked horrible then scouted around until he saw two young men sitting in a car backed into a parking space by a liqueur store. He backed in next to them and walked around to the driver’s window.

  “I’d like to do some business with you,” David proposed.

  “Get outta here. I can smell cop all over you,” the fellow said with a smirk.

  “Not that kind of business. I want to get rid of that car,” David said, tipping his head at it.

  “Jus’ rob a bank?” the fellow guessed, “or is it stolen?”

  “It’s a rental and clean right now, but it will be reported stolen in the morning, day after tomorrow. By that time, if you’re smart, you’ll have sold it to a chop shop. I want to trade cars and have the use of this one for those two days,” David said, thumping the door. “Fair trade? I can’t hide the fact I rented it, but I don’t want anybody to know where I am by the time it’s reported stolen.”

  “Somebody after you,” the passenger said. It wasn’t a question.

  “Yep, some New York guys. I want to be across Virginia and maybe as far as Ohio before they figure out I’m not coming back from DC.”

  “Dis a hunk o’ junk, you know?” the driver asked, looking at the rental appraisingly. It was a measure of how crazy the deal was that he’d admit that instead of trying to praise it.

  “You’ll probably get enough from the chop to get better,” David suggested.

  “How we do this?” the guy asked.

  “You clear out any business items you got aboard. I pull down a few places and we both get out. Your friend walks off a ways. We both put our keys on the hood and walk past each other and take the new car,” David suggested.

  The fellow thought about that a little. “Works for me,” he agreed.

  David pulled well away. If the fellow tried to cheat on him David was hardened up from walking with Uncle. He figured he could out sprint him. If the worst happened and the fellow pulled a gun he might find it melting in his hand, or frozen to it so cold he couldn’t shoot or let go of it.

  Nothing like that happened. The man walked down and picked the key fob up, saluted David and got in his new car. His friend came walking back in no big hurry. When David tried, the old Buick started right up. It didn’t belch blue smoke and it even had a half tank of gas. The two stayed parked when he drove away. You’d think the pair of them would want to go for a ride, but David suspected they were waiting there to keep a business appointment. He smiled. They might have even thought he was who they were waiting for at first.

  David turned up the ramp and went south. If the previous owners were asked which way he went they’d probably say he made some crack about going west. A quick search to make sure they hadn’t left any merchandise behind wouldn’t hurt. He had to shovel out all the fast food wrappers and cups anyhow. A plastic bag with his shower things from this morning was in the trunk of the rental, but nothing that would identify him. When he gassed up he’d check the oil, tire pressure and transmission fluid. He doubted that pair’s business priorities favored heavy maintenance.

  A black guy in an old car with DC plates might be a cop magnet, so drove through most of North Carolina but stopped early, before dark and when traffic would thin out. He he
ld it down to a hundred and ten kph, not so much for the police but at the hundred fifteen limit it started to shimmy.

  The next day took him to Georgia and he stopped to buy a change of clothing and a cheap bag, once again stopped early and parked among the cars that were visibly staff for the hotel. He gave his rental car information to the desk however. At the crack of dawn he went down and drove the junker to an all night restaurant and left it there with the windows rolled down and the keys in the ignition.

  After walking back to the hotel he showered and changed clothes. He had the hotel continental breakfast and joked around with the two ladies servicing it so they would remember him. Then he checked out and walked out the door with his bag. He was back in a few minutes and asked the people at the front desk if they had by any chance had cause to have a vehicle towed last night or this morning? When they said no, David made a show of looking in his pockets and pulling his dirty clothing out of the bag and searching the pockets.

  “I’m afraid I’m missing my key fob,” he informed the desk clerk. “I don’t know when I lost it. It could have been last night or this morning either one, but I walked all around your lot and the car isn’t there. Would you call the local police please? I’m going to have to report it stolen.”

  David was sitting in the lobby looking dejected when a single officer walked in. He took the other end of the lobby sofa from David and took the report on a tablet. David readily admitted he’d lost the key fob and theorized somebody found it. The officer asked if he had the optional insurance to cover that? David knew he hadn’t and said so. In reality he declined it because he didn’t care to commit insurance fraud. He could well afford the cost a cheap rental car to get away safely.

  The officer suggested he call the rental firm next and helpfully suggested he might have coverage through his other insurance policies or his credit card.

  David didn’t know if that was so or not, but he imagined if he offered to pay for the car up front the rental company wouldn’t argue with him.

  “Do you have a way home?” the officer asked. “The rental folks may be very reluctant to send you out another car. If they do they’ll insist on full coverage on this one.”