We Have Till Dawn

by Cara Dee

  In turn, it’d made me wanna drop clues about myself, little teasers, which I knew would’ve been a dick move.

  I wasn’t actually gonna do it.

  I wasn’t gonna ask what he did for a living either, no matter how curious I was.

  “Okay.” I nudged him onto his back and kissed my way down his stomach. “Go to work, then.”

  I sucked his soft cock into my mouth and peered up at him.

  My latest drug was his sleep-laden grin. It was fucking beautiful.

  He’d relaxed around me so much lately, and I loved it.

  “That’s unfair.” He sighed contentedly and closed his eyes. “I don’t think I can come again.”

  Me either. We’d gotten three hours of sleep at the most. The rest of the time had been spent fucking, sucking, fingering, and making out like teenagers.

  “I won’t be late tonight,” he murmured.

  “Good.” I swirled my tongue around his cock and pushed the head of him against the roof of my mouth.

  He tensed up a bit and shook his head, then pushed himself up on his elbows. “Don’t make me hard. You’re too good at that.”

  I kissed the tip. “What if I don’t obey like a good little boy?”

  His gaze darkened, and he raked his teeth over his bottom lip. “You’re a fantasy come true. And you want as much sex as I do.”

  I had noticed that he was freaking insatiable for his age. I’d read about it too. It wasn’t uncommon for autistic people to be kinky or hypersexual, and Gideon certainly ticked both boxes. Speaking of, we should start living out a few of his fantasies. He had no issues talking about them.

  The problem was, most of his fantasies took place in public. Gideon definitely had an exhibitionist in him.

  “Do you wanna play with me in public tonight?” I asked, licking the length of his cock.

  He groaned and fell back against his pillow again, and I couldn’t help but grin victoriously. I loved having this effect on him.

  “What do you suggest?” He scrubbed his hands over his face.

  He was getting hard too.

  “Wait,” he said. “I know what we’re going to do. Leave it to me.” He pushed himself up once more and gestured for me to crawl over him. “Do you mind if people see you?”

  I quirked a brow and straddled his stomach. “I’m not shy, if that’s what you’re asking.” Truth be told, I wanted the surprise. “Don’t tell me anything.” I leaned down and kissed him softly. “If I have any problems with anything, I’ll let you know.”

  “Good.” He squeezed my ass tightly and kissed me back. “The filthier, the better.”

  I shivered as he grazed his middle finger over my opening. “Downright obscene, Daddy.”

  “Mmm, role-play…” He groaned and flipped me over. A somersault rocked my stomach as my back hit the mattress. “Maybe I need you one more time before I leave.”

  Maybe I needed him too. Another round, I meant. Not him.

  When I took the elevator down to the street that night, I gave myself a pep talk after the minor nervous breakdown I’d had getting out of the shower earlier. Okay, it was possible I was being a drama queen, but this was something else. This was new. I’d spent three weeks in bed with Gideon, a mysterious rich dude with a perverted mind and some sort of confusion about his sexuality, and now I was leaving the apartment building to go somewhere with him.

  I’d even paused to consider and reconsider what to wear, and that just wasn’t me.

  I wasn’t uncultured; I’d had dates in restaurants with food that cost more than rent, and I wasn’t a stranger to dressing up. But unless there was a dress code, I wore jeans and band tees.

  I’d opted for a black Henley tonight. Anthony had given it to me because it’d been too tight for him.

  I shouldn’t be nervous. Based on the fantasies Gideon had talked about, we were either going for a dirty ride in his car, or we were going to a bar. Actually, there was a possibility we were going to an adult store too, though I wasn’t sure he’d go for that yet. On the other hand, maybe that would be easier than a bar. At a bar, he’d have to pretend to converse with me, and that could get personal. God forbid.

  I stepped out of the elevator and zipped up my jacket. At the end of the fifteen-or-so-feet-long hallway, I saw him. On the other side of the door, rather. He was leaning back against the car door, a car that didn’t belong to him. He’d texted me earlier to let me know he’d be using Tina’s chauffeur service, meaning we’d have a driver who got paid to keep his mouth shut, regardless of what he saw in the back seat.

  I’d gotten the impression that Gideon wasn’t unfamiliar with personal drivers, but I understood why he wouldn’t use one of his own tonight. I wasn’t sure, though. It was just another one of my theories about his private life. But yeah, I bet he had a driver. He was that kind of man.

  Here we go.

  Gideon glanced up from the sidewalk as I exited the building, and he flashed me a smirk tinged with nerves.

  It settled some of mine.

  “Imagine doing this with a sleep mask,” I said.

  His eyes flashed with humor. Then he opened the door for me. “Take a ride with me.”

  Yes, sir.

  I climbed into the black SUV and immediately recognized the driver. We exchanged a subtle nod. He’d been working for Tina back in the day, too.

  The back seat was…spacious. There was enough room for me to kneel at Gideon’s feet if he wanted me to.

  I hoped he wanted me to. The more sex, the better. It would save me from accidentally filling the silence with chitchat.

  As soon as Gideon joined me and closed the door, the driver pulled away from the curb. The light in the car faded, and I was struck by a sense of awkwardness that I didn’t like. I wasn’t used to it. I wouldn’t say I was the most confident guy out there, but I didn’t take myself too seriously, and I was pretty easygoing.

  Fuck, it was my job to make Gideon comfortable here.

  I cleared my throat. “How was your day?”

  That was innocent enough, and he could get away with a simple “Good.”

  “Long. Way too long.” He drummed his fingers restlessly against his knee and peered out the window, making it abundantly clear that he felt the awkwardness too. “Lunch was inedible, and dinner wasn’t much better.”

  I bit my tongue, literally. I wanted to ask him shit. I wanted to offer a shoulder if he needed one.

  “Are you hungry?” I wondered.

  He shook his head quickly and faced me. “Before you ask a second question, it’s customary for me to ask how your day was. So. How was your day?”

  I smiled, because I couldn’t not. I thought he carried himself well and fit into our “normal” society most of the time, but whenever his peculiarities made themselves known, my sappy heart melted a little.

  “It was good.” I reached over the middle seat and grabbed his hand, threading our fingers together. “I did this and that, went here and there, and my lunch was awesome. So was my dinner.”

  I’d taken Nonna to Sahadi’s for some shopping after a short day at work, and then I’d had dinner at her place while she had gossiped about people in the neighborhood.

  Gideon stared at our hands and brushed his thumb over my knuckles. “You’re comfortable with me.”

  That wasn’t what I’d expected to hear. I cocked my head at him and wondered where his mind was at. Which…well, based on our brief history together, he was rarely mellow or in balance. I’d experienced him with anxiety and discomfort; I’d been with him when he was hard as a rock and thinking only of sex, and, recently, I’d seen him grin and chuckle, often when we were balls deep in cuddling and fighting off the cobwebs of sleep. But other than those precious moments, he alternated between horny and on edge, so it was close to impossible to guess his thoughts.

  “I’m testing the waters,” I corrected carefully. “I poke to see if now’s a good time to push a limit or break a rule.”

  He frowned at me. “
Why do you want to push my limits? That’s not nice.”

  Heh. Yeah, well… No, he was right. It wasn’t nice of me. “I’m curious about you,” I admitted. “I like our chemistry and…” Fuck. What was I doing? Soon as I heard myself uttering those words, I knew I’d crossed a line. My own damn line. I was getting invested. “I’m sorry.” I rubbed a hand over my mouth and glanced out the window. We were heading south along the west side. We’d just passed Chelsea Park. “I’ll be on my best behavior from now on, I promise.” I squeezed his hand but couldn’t look his way yet.

  It was rattling.

  At the same time, there was an honest indifference within me that went, “So fucking what?”

  So fucking what if I was genuinely interested in him? It happened.

  “Change of plans,” Gideon said abruptly. “Please take us to the corner of East 64th and Park.”

  My eyebrows flew up, and I turned toward him. What would we do on the Upper East Side? Considering our original direction, I had been leaning more toward the adult store option. The Village was full of ’em. But up by Central Park…? The only thing that belonged there was Gideon himself. He could probably afford a condo there.

  “To answer your second question, I am, in fact, hungry,” he told me tightly. And quietly. He was uncomfortable and restless again. His knee bounced, and his grip on my hand bordered on painful.

  I played along for now. “What are you in the mood for?”

  “French fries,” he stated frankly. “I haven’t had any yet this week.”

  It was Tuesday.

  It was best to roll with the punches, because if he was in the mood for fries and had to go halfway across Manhattan to get some, he had very specific needs.

  “I have a minor obsession,” he muttered, facing the window. I stifled my amusement as best as I could. “Now you share something insignificant about yourself.”

  A flurry of excitement flew through me, and it made me shake my head to myself. This wasn’t good, any of it. It was a two-month thing, and we only had five weeks left. A little less than that, even. But fuck it, right?

  “I have a minor obsession with ice cream sundaes,” I offered.

  I caught his mouth twisting with mirth in the reflection of his window.

  “I’ve seen the bowls in your sink,” he said. “Doesn’t look like a minor obsession.”

  I chuckled.

  The streets blurred together in streaks of red, yellow, and green for the next few minutes as we shared likes and dislikes about “insignificant” things. He was a fan of taking long walks in the park with his dog; I was a fan of any day I didn’t have to take the subway. His favorite season was the fall, and so was mine. He hated white wine but loved red. And chocolate; he really, really loved chocolate, but he didn’t let himself have it often.

  I hated wine, loved beer, loved chocolate, loved cookies—okay, I had a big sweet tooth—and I spent way too much money on sweet slices of heaven at Milk Bar. Gideon had never heard of the place, and the words were right there on the tip of my tongue, to offer to take him there…

  Should I?

  Pump the brakes a little.

  I could compromise. “I’ll pick up a box that we can share in bed when we’ve burned off a lotta calories this weekend.”

  He nodded once. “I’d like that very much.”

  His response was so formal, but I was getting better at understanding his signals now. He was struggling with the boundaries, struggling against them to do what he really wanted, and I had to admit that was why I wanted to break the damn rules. I could see sometimes that he was forcing himself to hold back, and I hated it. I wanted more for him.

  He was more than just a client.

  “Would you like me to turn, sir, or is it okay here?” the driver asked.

  I glanced out and noticed we were here. The light was red, and we had time to jump out.

  “Here’s fine,” Gideon responded. “I’ll text when we’re ready to leave.”

  “Yes, sir.”

  We left the car, and Gideon shut the door before he gestured up the sidewalk. “It’s the storefront that glows green.”

  There could be only one spot on the otherwise dead street, and I wrinkled my nose automatically. It looked to be a small spot and hardly what one might call cozy, not that I’d expected it. Sterile was more appropriate. We walked closer, and all I could see was pristine white, lime-green booths, lime-green paint swirls on the walls, and the brightest of spotlights.

  “You will notice how clean it is,” Gideon said with a smile. “There isn’t a grain of salt left behind on a single table. The minute you vacate your spot, someone cleans it.”

  Okay, so while the colors didn’t seem to be up Gideon’s alley, the cleanliness sure as hell was.

  Gideon reached the door before I did, and he held it open for me.

  It was a small establishment, with maybe ten or so booths and a counter with half a dozen stools, and the menu had a lot in common with any other fast-food joint. Except for it being more expensive here. A regular cheeseburger went for $12.99. Free soda with any purchase over five bucks, though!

  “What would you like?” Gideon asked. “I can highly recommend the sliders and any fries.”

  Any fries… There were four kinds to choose from. Regular, steakhouse, battered, and curly, and you could choose to have them loaded or plain.

  “I’ll try the loaded regular ones, I think,” I decided. “I had a big dinner at my grandmother’s place, so I’m not very hungry.”

  “Loaded regular—excellent choice. Soda with that?” He stepped forward to order, and I requested a medium Coke.

  There was only one other couple in here.

  It was gonna be interesting to see what Gideon’s agenda was. I grabbed some napkins, ketchup, and two straws from the condiment counter, then picked a booth in the middle. Something had triggered this change of plan of his, and I was wondering if it’d been my talk of chemistry and being interested. One could at least hope we’d talk more.

  I assumed we came from two different worlds, but that didn’t mean we couldn’t be friends at the end of this arrangement.

  I chewed on the inside of my cheek as a small voice in the back of my hopelessly romantic mind went, “Or maybe more.”

  It was dumb.

  Tina hadn’t been joking about my sad Facebook statuses. I didn’t hate being single to the point where I’d jump into a relationship for the sake of it—far from it—but I was lonely. I hadn’t been in a relationship in over a year.

  Gideon tugged at my desire to have someone to take care of. I couldn’t describe it in any other way than…it had to be chemistry. Because it wasn’t something I’d felt with clients in the past.

  When he came over with a tray and his eyes were glued to the fries, I couldn’t help but smile. He wasn’t watching his step or anything. It was all about the fries.

  “Prepare yourself to be amazed.” He sat down across from me and opened the paper container with the loaded fries for me. “I don’t believe you will need ketchup.”

  “You can’t have fries without ketchup.” No matter how much cheese and jalapenos someone had dumped on top.

  “You certainly can,” he insisted firmly.

  He’d picked a serving each of regular fries and battered fries for himself, and he was fucking adorable as he inserted a single fry into his mouth and closed his eyes in pleasure. He chewed slowly, and the way his jaw moved was nothing short of pornographic.

  “Perfect crunch, every time,” he mumbled to himself.

  I grinned.

  This was what I wanted. Decadent sex in all its glory, but I needed sex to be personal these days. It was partly what kept that rock out of my stomach. I wanted to get to know Gideon better. I wanted to see him like this, eating fries, not worrying about others’ reactions or whatever molds he tried to fit into.

  This was real.

  I pulled a couple fries out of the melted cheese and threw them into my mouth, and I had to ha
nd it to the man, he knew good fries. It was as if McDonald’s and Burger King had a love child. The greasy saltiness from one, and the flavor and crunch from the other.

  “So, is this your number one spot in the city?” I asked, wanting to start a conversation.

  He shook his head and stuck a straw into his soda. “But it’s possibly in the top ten.” He offered a look of disdain when I dipped a fry into my ketchup. “I’m just going to ignore that.”

  I chuckled.

  “What’s your number one spot in the city?” he asked.

  So, we were still exchanging the insignificant trivia bits. I was fine with that.

  “The tourist magnets,” I replied. “I love Times Square. I’ll go there sometimes just to watch people. It’s the center of the universe.”

  “I believe the center of the universe is—never mind. You weren’t being literal.” He cleared his throat and picked another fry. He was suddenly avoiding eye contact too, and he shifted uncomfortably in his seat. “I wanted to bring you here for a reason. You’ve mentioned breaking the rules, and I need to confess that I’ve already broken them. My curiosity got the best of me after I saw your rehearsal in Brooklyn, so I looked you up.”

  The words left him in a rapid rush, and then it was just silence. Even in my mind.

  I didn’t know how to react, to be frank. Part of me was flattered and relieved, because it meant he was interested too, though I didn’t know how far that extended. Part of me was…surprised? Definitely. Either way, I wasn’t angry, and he looked like he was expecting anger.

  “All right.” I sucked some salt off the edge of my thumb and smiled a little. “What exactly did you find out?”

  He furrowed his brow. “That everyone calls you Nicky, not Nick. I found you on social media. You seem to be able to play countless instruments, and you’re very close with your older brother. Unfortunately, your Instagram is set to private, so I only saw the few photos you have on Facebook.”

  Unfortunately.

  I stifled my amusement as much as I could.