The Adventures of the FancyCrazyHydrants - The Mission

by Baltazar Ray

  “KKRUNKKKKKKKK!”

  Hydra saw the dogs look up while the steel claw lifted the junk car with him on top. It rose slowly higher and higher—he was getting dizzy by the motion and he wondered if the crane operator even knew that he was on top of the junk car.

  The dogs knew what was going on as Hydra struggled to keep his balance. They scrambled in position and howled in anticipation of Hydra's freefall. Hydra was toast.

  The crane operator was loading the trucks with junk cars. He raised the load higher but stopped it in mid-air, which caused the load to swing, doubling Hydra's effort to hold on. The operator jumped off the cab to chat with the truck drivers.

  Hydra held on tight and didn't know what to do. He was leaving everything to fate. The junk car veered with his weight and made a loud screeching noise—Hydra was very close to falling. He became more and more exposed and the dogs got more and more excited and continued howling like hyenas.

  The men, oblivious of the impending disaster, swung around to see what the commotion was all about. The crane operator laughed with the other drivers as he jumped back in his cab and raised the load higher and began swinging the load like a pendulum, apparently to tease the dogs. The dogs went crazy and chased the load relentlessly.

  “Go for it, boys! Go for it!” the operator yelled as he played with the lever. The junk car swung wildly from left to right while the dogs ran back and forth trailing the suspended trophy.

  “This will teach you not to make so much noise,” exclaimed the operator.

  Hydra was being held in place by a thin metal strap. He was only seconds away from falling to the anguish of the dogs. He closed his eyes and tried to concentrate.

  “PLANK!”

  The metal strap snapped but Hydra clambered to grab another one, although this too, could also snap at any time. His body was dangling in the air like bait on a fishing hook. The dogs were now on their hind legs with their paws extended in Hydra’s direction, ready to bite the 'fish.' All of them drooling in fervent anticipation.

  Hydra closed his eyes. Please Voice wherever you are, help me. I’m sorry Pluggo—I should have listened to you. He kept his concentration and held on.

  “PLANK!”

  The metal strap snapped and Hydra began to fall. He knew the dogs would eat him alive when he hit the ground and break into pieces. One dog will chew his arms, another dog will run with his head, and the other dog will run with his nozzles. Hydra was imagining how the dogs would feast on his body and make him look like Mr. Potato Head. He was falling as if in slow motion, still conscious but focused on the whole event. If he could only sum up enough power to save himself—because once he hit the pavement—he's gone. Forget about the mission.

  * *

  But something was happening. Midway to his fall he felt his body heaving and expanding. He opened his eyes to see that his body had expanded like a large balloon, ready to explode…

  “KA-BOOOOSSSSSSSHHHHHH!”

  “What the… ?” the crane operator said, as Hydra swooshed by—the operator saw the flying object and the mess it left behind.

  Hydra took off. He dropped a ton of water on the stunned dogs—the burst of water was so intense that it turned into gas and created a blinding fog on the ground.

  He soared a hundred feet in the air, high above the houses and the streets. He had wished that he could fly all along and not waste time walking and gliding—and now he was actually doing it! He figured that some power must simply come out of necessity—you just have to trust yourself.

  Thank you Voice, thought Hydra. He was so excited that he couldn’t wait to tell Pluggo. That's all he wanted to do now—to see Pluggo.

  He smiled at the snarling dogs below that were whimpering and howling. They just missed the big 'fish.' He knew how close he had come to becoming 'dog food' — he could still hear their frustrated barking.

  The streets looked familiar from above, and Hydra was confident that he was headed in the right direction. Hydra felt like a giant as he flew overlooking the cars, the people, and the houses—that looked like miniature toys. Hydra was enjoying the view.

  Suddenly, he shuddered—he was losing momentum. Hydra quickly looked for a soft landing site and saw a body of water just ahead. But he started to spin wildly and couldn’t control his flight. He rolled like a ball—he hoped to hit the water…

  Oh no, I can’t control my… Hydra lost consciousness.

  “SPLASSSSSSSSSSSHHHHHH!”

  CHAPTER 13

  The Dream

  “HYDRA!”

  “HYDRA!”

  “Hydra! It’s me Pluggo! Can you hear me?”

  Hydra, barely awake from his fall, thought he was dreaming. He heard a faint voice but couldn’t figure out who it was. The voice sounded like Pluggo.

  “HYDRA!”

  He abruptly sat up.

  “Huh? Pluggo? Is that you? Where’s Pluggo?” he asked, looking around, bewildered.

  “Pluggo is not around anymore!” somebody blurted out.

  Hydra could hardly see. There was a single light in the room. Its yellowish glare was swirling around above his head like a light on hula-hoop and was blurring out everything around him—causing him to become woozy.

  “What do you mean? I just heard his voice! Where am I?” Hydra asked.

  Everything was becoming clear to him. He was sitting on a chair in a semi-dark room with a light hanging above his head. It looked like an interrogation scene from a movie.

  “Can anyone stop this light from moving?”

  He heard somebody snickering.

  He wasn’t tied up and could move freely but he was afraid to move. He felt threatened as a tall figure came out of the shadows. He still couldn’t see clearly because of the merciless glare from the light overhead.

  “We found Pluggo faced down, deep under a stream. Where were you when this happened?”

  “Err… I don’t know. What are you talking about?” asked Hydra. Maybe Pluggo got into an accident or something. But that’s impossible. Pluggo swims like a fish. I don’t know. But that voice, it sounds familiar. I know that voice…

  “Err… May I have a glass of water?” Hydra asked, deciding to play along.

  “Give him a glass of water!” the figure commanded.

  That voice, it sounds mean, but I’m getting close to finding out who he is.

  “SPLASSSSSSHHHHHHH!”

  Somebody splashed a glass of water on his face.

  “Wahhhh! What was that for? Have you guys been watching too many movies?” Hydra had been surprised by the splash of water but he did feel a bit more awake.

  “Now, I’m asking you again. Don’t make me lose my patience. Answer the question. Where were you…”

  “MEET! It’s you! Don’t you remember me?” Hydra cried, elated that he had found Meet at last.

  A tall hydrant came out of the shadows wearing some kind of a cowboy outfit. He was tall and skinny and he looked stupefying silly. And the other fire hydrants that had encircled him—he was sure that these were the same fire hydrants at the back of Ben and Guido’s truck when they made their great escape.

  “Meet! What happened to you, after you saved those children?”

  “Listen punk, don’t change the story. A crime has been committed here and someone’s gonna have to answer for it.”

  “But Meet, you don’t understand,” Hydra replied, as he noticed Meet’s thick mustache and shiny badge. He wondered if he had made a mistake—maybe this guy just looked like Meet.

  “I don’t know any meat. I don’t know any cow meat, any pork meat, nor any chicken meat. I’m a true vegetarian. I’m getting very annoyed here. Everyone here calls me Sheriff, not meat. I don’t want to hear that stupid name again, is that clear?”

  Hydra couldn’t believe what was happening. He was getting very frustrated—but the real wake up call was about to come.

  “SPLAAAAAAAAAANNK!”

  Somebody slapped Hydra out of the chair. He hit the floor. Gingerly, he
struggled back to his seat.

  “Whoa! Wait a minute now. You guys are getting violent!” More shadows moved forward as he protested. He sat back in his chair breathing heavily and smoldering with anger.

  “I’ll give you some time to think! I want an answer by the time I come back. Bring out the SyDogs!” yelled the Sheriff as he and his cohorts, rushed out through the back door.

  The backdoor stands at the end of a hallway that was only a few paces from the kitchen. A square table and four chairs were positioned in the center where Hydra sits with the dangling light. Hydra heard the approaching dogs as they slipped and scratched the shiny kitchen floor, rushing towards Hydra.

  “GRRRRRRR! RAF! RAF! RAF! GRRRRRRR!”

  That barking? Sydogs? That can’t be the same dogs from the junkyard? Hydra braced himself. Oh no, not again!

  He froze. Three vicious-looking dogs were led into the room. This time Hydra saw them up-close. His eyes wandered around the room and he was wondering how to make his escape. These dogs could terrorize anyone with their dirty silver fangs. Their silver eyes looked like they could see inside you. The three dogs took their positions next to each other and acted like trained soldiers. A dog blocked the hallway leading to the door where the sheriff and his cohorts had exited.

  They growled and exposed their sharp teeth to intimidate Hydra. He was scared but he was also angry. He wondered if a conspiracy was going on, or if he was just going plain crazy.

  The light above Hydra’s head was still dangling and lazily swirling around. Why is that? he thought. He glanced around the room as one of the dogs inaudibly snarled at him. The rest of the dogs were resting, and getting ready to sleep. Hydra noticed a window to his left.

  Hmm… There’s a window ajar. The breeze coming through the window is causing the light to move. The breeze and the swinging light seem to have a hypnotic effect on the dogs. Great!

  Soon, two of the dogs were snoring while the third one was trying to stay awake, his eyelids, now heavy. Hydra knew that the animal would soon succumb to the tranquil setting, anytime soon. He himself would have fallen asleep had he not intended on escaping.

  Silence.

  The three dogs were asleep.

  Hydra cautiously stood up, wary that this could be a trap. At least, if the dogs wake up, he could pretend that he was simply stretching. But he didn’t have to worry—the dogs were fast asleep—their loud snoring reassured him of that. Hydra tiptoed towards the door. He was worried that the breeze coming through the window would carry his hydrant scent and wake up the dogs. Nah, I’ve got to chance it.

  Hydra was thankful that the floors were made of concrete and didn’t creak under his weight. A few feet from the door, he was about to step over the dog that was blocking the exit. This is no problem—as long as the breeze and the moving light don’t stop.

  Hydra lifted his foot to step over the dog when suddenly, the dog shifted position. The dog made a wide yawn and snuggled comfortably on his paws. Hydra froze with his foot in mid-air, balancing like a ballerina. He almost stepped on the dog before he got a grip on the wall. He can't make any noise. He finally managed to clear the dog and continued to tiptoe until he reached the door. Whew! He slowly turned the knob, making sure it didn’t squeak and rouse the dogs. Looking back he saw that the dogs were still asleep and he continued to open the door fully and was ready to step out when…

  “SURPRISE!”

  “HAPPY BIRTHDAY, HYDRA!” a crowd started chanting.

  Hydra jumped in surprise and fell on the floor. He was flabbergasted and didn’t know what to do. He quickly glanced back to see if the noise had awakened the SyDogs—they were still there and still dozing off. But there was a crowd in front of him, all-smiling and waiting for him to respond.

  They were all there—Crooton, Splatter, Grunt, Veeda, Ben and Guido, the crane operator, and the truck drivers—almost everyone he met along the way. They were all applauding and cheering and just happy to see Hydra. There were also small fire hydrants running around like little brats. The backyard seemed to be full of friends he had met along his journey—but he couldn’t see Pluggo or Meet. They should be around here somewhere.

  Hydra stood up, composed himself and forced a smile. He kept looking back, in case the SyDogs woke up and tried to devour him, but the presence of the crowd made him feel secure. No SyDogs would attack with all these friends around me. But where could Pluggo be?

  As a courtesy, he walked around greeting everyone and thanking them for coming. He had no choice but to play along. At the same time, he kept a wary eye for Pluggo—the only one he could trust.

  “Thank you. Thanks for coming,” Hydra said as he walked among the crowd—shaking hands and playing along. This can’t be happening. The crowd dispersed and continued their conversation within their own groups. As usual, the men were grouped together, mostly talking about sports. Every now and then a roar of laughter could be heard.

  Hydra watched the 'baby' hydrants chasing each other. Some of them were playing 'rocket ship' and trying to fly like him and Pluggo. Cute, thought Hydra. They were flying up and down, squirting water from their base.

  The backyard was spacious enough to hold everyone, with colorful flowerbeds that hugged a nifty white picket fence bordering the house. It was an unusually warm and sunny afternoon with lots of bustling shade from the trees that were swaying in the early winter breeze. Everyone seemed to be having a good time. Hydra thought of the SyDogs inside the house and decided to check them out.

  He excused himself from the guests and walked slowly towards the back door. He held the doorknob but hesitated for a second before turning it. The door made a long eerie squeak as he swung it open. No dog blocking the hallway! They’re gone! He peered inside, making sure he was safe—took two small steps and tried to close the door behind—he left it slightly ajar, just in case.

  It was eerily quiet inside the house—the same nap-inducing breeze was coming through the window. But that’s the view from the hallway. I have to have a closer look. Hydra was hesitant as he looked back at the door—he was ready to run. But he forged ahead and tiptoed, slowly peeking into the room, when…

  “Hi, Hydra! What brings you?”

  It was Frank the Baker decorating a cake, the same white apron hugging his belly, and his prominent, slicked- back white hair. He glanced at Hydra through his lowered thick-rimmed glasses. They were both stunned to see each other, waiting who's going to talk next.

  "What? You look like you've seen a ghost," Frank chuckled as he continued what he was doing.

  Hydra couldn't say a thing. He must have looked all white when Frank saw him. He kept an eye on Frank but continued to look around for the SyDogs, trying desperately to convince himself that he was not going crazy.

  "Did you see a dog here, Frank?" Hydra asked.

  "Nope."

  Frank had placed a cake on the table, directly under the dangling light. He was just finishing up the letters, “Happy Birthday Hydra!”

  "Wow! Thanks, Frank! That's very thoughtful of you." Hydra came to his senses.

  “It won’t take long Hydra, it won’t take long,” Frank said, as his hand shakily finished the inscription on the cake.

  “Oh, uhh… have you seen Pluggo around?”

  “Nope, I haven’t but would you call somebody out there to help me carry this cake?”

  “Err… okay,” Hydra said, disappointed that Frank cut him off. He decided to ask him again later.

  Hydra walked back towards the hallway and slowly opened the door in anticipation for another surprise. The door made a squeaking sound again. The crowd was the same as he had left them. Whew! He smiled nervously as some of the guest looked his way. He was about to call someone to help Frank when suddenly the noise and the chattering stopped. There was a flurry towards the backyard gate. Someone seemed to have arrived and Hydra tried to see who. He wondered if it could be Pluggo and Meet and hurriedly made his way through the crowd, towards the gate.

  “Excuse me—
let me pass please, excuse me!”

  Hydra stopped in his tracks when he saw the sheriff. Hydra had almost forgotten about the interrogation that he had recently suffered—he had become very comfortable with the crowd but he was all mixed up now. He was also very disappointed that the new visitor was not Pluggo.

  The sheriff summoned his cohorts and the Sydogs that were partly hidden by the crowd.

  “GIT ‘IM!” The sheriff commanded.

  Hydra reacted and ran into several guests, spilling food and drinks all over.

  “Oops! Sorry! Excuse me,” he said as he scrambled for safety.

  Hydra rushed towards the other side of the backyard, followed by the sheriff’s cohorts. The sheriff looked menacing with his bright-red metal skin, his thick curly mustache, and his cowboy outfit. But Hydra was most frightened by the SyDogs. Run, Hydra, run. There is no more time to think now!

  Hydra saw a patch of shrubs on the farther side of the yard—there was a stream behind it. The sheriff’s cohorts were closing in on him so he jumped and submerged into the water.

  “SPLASSSSSSSSSSSHH!”

  The cohorts didn’t seem to know what to do as they paced along the bank—until the sheriff and the SyDogs arrived.

  “Jump into the water, all of you and ‘git ‘im!” the sheriff exhorted his cohorts. One after another, the hydrants jumped into the water.

  “SPLASSSSSH! SPLASSSSSH! SPLASSSSSH!”

  The dogs walked around the bank giving directions where to track Hydra. Fortunately for Hydra, the SyDogs, which were highly robotic and electronic, could not jump into the water. They had too much electricity in their bodies that they could not fully submerge into the water and not get their system messed up. But that didn't bother the sheriff as he made his cohorts—the hydrants jump instead and find Hydra.

  Hydra hid behind a large boulder at the bottom of the stream. With the thick brush surrounding the boulder, it concealed him completely from his pursuers. He slipped down into the mud and covered his body. I am safe here for now, he thought. Hydra sat and waited quietly, being careful not to spew any bubbles and expose his hideaway. The hydrants were all around him and were poking at all corners. One hydrant went past over his head, the boulder's shadow concealed his hideaway.