by Robin Falcon
Butterfly Kisses
By
Robin Falcon
Contents
Title Page
Table of Contents
Copyright
Acknowledgments
Chapter 1 – Tyler
Chapter 2 - Ryder
Chapter 3 – Tyler
Chapter 4 – Tyler
Chapter 5 – Tyler
Chapter 6 – Ryder
Chapter 7 – Ryder
Chapter 8 – Tyler
Chapter 9 – Ryder
Chapter 10 – Tyler
Chapter 11 – Ryder
Chapter 12 – Tyler
Chapter 13 – Ryder
Chapter 14 – Tyler
Chapter 15 – Ryder
Chapter 16 – Tyler
Chapter 17 – Ryder
Chapter 18 – Tyler
Chapter 19 – Ryder
Chapter 20 – Ryder
Chapter 21 – Tyler
Chapter 22 – Ryder
Chapter 23 – Tyler
Chapter 24 – Final
Butterfly Kisses
By: Robin Falcon
Copyright ©2019 by Robin Falcon
All rights reserved. Printed in the United States of America.
No part of this book may be used or reproduced in any form or by any means electronic or mechanical, including photocopying, recording, or by and information storage and retrieval systems, without prior written permission of the author except where permitted by law.
The Characters and events portrayed in this book are fictitious. Any Similarity to real person, living or dead is coincidental and not intended by the author.
Acknowledgments
This is for all those that taught me about love and
heartache.
Chapter 1
Tyler
I’ve known Ryder since the day she was born.
Of course, I was only a year old at the time, but I know for a fact I can't remember a day in my life where Ryder wasn’t there annoying me in some way.
Our parents were not only friends, but neighbors as well. So, before we were even born, they’d already decided that Ryder and I’d be lifelong friends.
I can say, among the stockpiles of photos our parents decided to keep, it was obvious we never left each other’s side, even back then.
In fact, our parents loved showing off all our embarrassing bath time photos, nap time cuddles, and thousands of us playing together with two toothy grins.
However, it wasn’t until I turned about five years old that I could really recall any of my own memories of Ryder.
*************************
When I started school, as a Kindergartener, I quickly realized Ryder wasn't like most of the other girls. She didn’t wear dresses, play with dolls, and she definitely wasn't scared of bugs or getting hurt.
She was more like one of us boys.
She liked getting dirty, playing video games, throwing a ball around, and she was usually the one thinking up new dangerous adventures for us.
I never really questioned my friendship with her until I noticed that none of the other boys in my class had friends that were girls. A few had sisters, but none of them spoke fondly of them.
If I’m being honest, my first real memory of Ryder was, ironically, me questioning my friendship with her to begin with.
Why was I friends with a girl when none of my other friends were?
In fact, it started to bug me so much, I remember begging my parents on a daily basis to let me bring over any other friend from school.
They always said no.
They didn't want me to exclude Ryder since she was homeschooled and didn't have any friends of her own. At first, I blamed her. We even fought for weeks over it, in a way only five-year olds could. I told her I was tired of playing with a ‘stupid girl’, and she told me I was the ‘stupid girl'.
After a few weeks went by, I missed playing with her.
Soon, I stopped bugging my parents all together about my other friends. Instead, I found myself riding bikes with Ryder again, and playing in the treehouse behind her house until it got dark.
I knew as long as my friends at school didn’t know about Ryder, then they couldn’t pick on me for having a ‘girl friend'. So, maybe it wasn’t so bad keeping Ryder a secret for now.
It worked too…for a while.
I went to school every day and played with the boys. Then, each day, I got to come home and play with Ryder too.
On occasion, I’d even go to one of my buddies houses for the weekend. They never saw Ryder, and she never saw them.
The set up worked for two years.
Then, I turned seven.
A friend, from my second-grade class, had his parents call mine and ask if they’d watch him for a few hours after school. For the first time in two years, they’d agreed to let one of my classmates come over.
It was inevitable, my two worlds were about to collide.
Now, thinking back, I still remember the look on Ryder’s face the first time I broke her heart.
Ryder knocked at my door like clockwork, five minutes after the bus had dropped me off. When I opened the door, I saw her standing there in sneakers, a pair of shorts, and a white t-shirt stained with dirt already.
I had to admit, the only reason I knew Ryder was even a girl was because her parents told me. That, and maybe her voice. Otherwise, nothing about her screamed, “I’m a girl.”
Her dirty blonde hair matched my own, shaggy, and short. It was usually unkept and messy along with whatever she wore for the day.
Strangers frequently confused us for brothers, but it rarely bothered us, or at least it hadn't at first. Now, as she stood there, I felt annoyed that people could assume we were brothers.
Her hair fell into her face, hiding green eyes that were already covered by glasses. She started wearing them last summer, and I remember she refused to let me try them on.
She was so annoying.
The second she saw us, as I opened the door, she smiled. She’d just lost a bottom front tooth and her grin showed it off proudly. She looked ridiculous.
“Can't play today, Ry. I have a friend over.”
“What does that make me?” She asked as her smiled faded into a pout.
I rolled my eyes. “Annoying, as usual.”
She stomped her foot on the porch. “Ty, I'll tell!” She threatened.
“Fine, go ahead!” I yelled.
Cole laughed behind me.
“You're friends with a girl?” He asked, as a few clues must’ve finally given away her gender.
“No, Ryder is barely a girl and she isn’t my friend. She is a nuisance that my parents make me play with.”
Ryder gave me a brief look, her eyes glossing over with tears, before she took off running from my porch crying. I’ve made Ryder cry numerous times before. Yet, this time I was gutted with guilt.
I hadn’t meant what I’d said. I did have fun playing with Ryder, even if she did annoy me every chance she got.
I was just too embarrassed to admit to Cole that I was friends with a girl, and because of that I’d hurt the one person who trusted me most. Who I trusted the most.
That was the first time I ever hurt Ryder, but little did I know then, it wouldn’t be the last.
The next day, and every day after, I swore to make it up to her. I waited for that knock on my front door each day and I'd open it up and see Ryder standing on the other side. I’d grin as I spotted her rocking back and forth on the heels of her sneakers, that obnoxious smile on her face.
As we got older, our friendship grew with us. I remember when one of us had a bad day we’d make a promise to sneak out after dark and meet up in her treehouse. Then we’d stay up to watc
h the stars, and talk.
It was our sanctuary away from life, and anything that existed outside the two of us.
*************************
So why is it, at twenty-four years old, the sight of that treehouse hurts so much?
Now, as I stand here in my old room peering out into her backyard where the old treehouse stands, I am suddenly reminded of all my past mistakes.
Suddenly, I'm reminded of Ryder.
Chapter 2
Ryder
I looked out my window, instinctively, as I packed my bags for my trip. The sun should’ve made me hopeful for a great day a head, instead, I was dreading it from the moment I woke up.
*************************
I didn’t start public school until I was twelve-years old. My parents insisted on home schooling me prior to that.
They assumed I got all the socializing I needed from the neighbor boy, who happened to be their friend’s son and my best friend.
I think my dad changed his mind when Tyler started bringing his buddies around more. Somewhere, along the way, having a girl around wasn’t so embarrassing anymore. In fact, over time, each of them had slowly starting to accept my presence and I’d built friendships with each of them.
Soon after, my dad decided I needed to make some female friends of my own, and finally agreed to enroll me in public school.
Once I started going to school with all of them, it was never just the two of us anymore. Instead, we all hung out between classes together and then some of us would meet up after school.
I’d be lying if I didn’t admit how thankful I was that Tyler never invited them to the treehouse. It was a reminder that no matter what was going on in life, we’d always have each other to fall back on. No matter who else entered our circle, we were still the start and end point of it all.
The treehouse was a place that reminded me of that. A place where we could talk about our parents, school, life, fights, friends, and then one day… even girls.
I remember the summer I turned fourteen, I was finally starting high school that September. I’d be back to school with Tyler and the rest of the guys, after a long year without them.
Our parents were having a barbeque to finalize the end of summer, and we’d been sitting in my treehouse for the last hour.
He was teasing me relentlessly all summer about how unready I was to be in high school, and around older boys. I didn't know it then, but that day changed our friendship forever.
“I am too ready; I even had my first kiss today.” I bragged in attempt to seem more mature.
“What? Prove it!” Tyler demanded, and I shot him a glare.
He knew just how sheltered I truly was. I’d only just started public school two years ago, and other than the friends I shared with Tyler, I didn’t have many of my own.
When it came to boys, everything I knew was stuff Tyler had taught me himself, and he knew for a fact he hadn't taught me anything about kissing.
“How?” I asked stubbornly.
He eyed me as if he knew I was lying.
Ironically, I was.
“Kiss me.” He stated, casually.
I paused for a moment, considering the few scraps of knowledge I had about kissing. “Eww, Ty. No.”
Tyler rolled his eyes. “It's just a kiss, Ry.”
I sighed, unwilling to admit that I’d lied. “Fine.”
I leaned in, and he closed his eyes. I paused briefly, considering it for a moment.
Considering kissing my best friend.
It wasn’t like I’d never thought about it. Tyler was an easy boy to have a crush on. He cared about me, we liked all the same things, he made me laugh, and we spent most of our free time together. Not to mention the fact that, even I couldn't deny how attractive my best friend was.
However, that was the problem, he was my best friend. I knew I’d never be anything more then another one of his buddies.
I couldn't kiss him. Not a real kiss anyway.
I moved in to rest my eyelid against his, fluttering my eyelashes against his before pulling back with a grin on my face, as if my intention from the start was just to be a smartass.
He opened his eyes and laughed. “You know that isn't a real kiss, Ry.”
I shrugged. “It is too. It’s a butterfly kiss.”
He rolled his eyes again. “Whatever you say.”
“I bet you haven’t kissed anyone yet, either.” I accused him in an effort to defend myself.
“I did too. I kissed Lizzy, from school.”
It was the first time he'd ever mentioned another girl to me, and for some reason it pitted my stomach.
“Prove it.” I dared, attempting to call him on what I was hoping to be his own bluff.
He turned towards me and eyed me a moment, as if considering his options. Then, before I could register what was happening, I felt his warm lips pressed tightly up against mine.
He held them there for what felt like minutes but, realistically, it was only seconds. His lips were soft, and I felt my heart racing as he pulled away.
He offered me a shrug.
As if, giving me my first kiss, was no different than the time he gave me my first noogie.
It was then that I realized just how I felt about Tyler and, even though Tyler may never be my first boyfriend, I wanted him to be my first for so many other things.
“There,” he said, looking out across my backyard and not at me.
“That was not a butterfly kiss.” I whispered, redundantly, as I reached up to touch my own lips.
He laughed. “No, it was a real kiss.”
“Does that mean I'm ready now?”
He finally looked back at me again, a confused look on his face. “For what?”
“Older boys?”
*************************
Memories of Tyler still plagued me. Even now, years later.
I hadn't been home in five years, and if it weren’t for my parents finally guilting me into it, I'd keep that streak going.
Now, at twenty-three, I lived a safe four-hour drive away from Tyler and our tiny hometown.
I preferred it that way.
Tyler may have been my best friend since diapers, but that all changed the summer I left for college.
Chapter 3
Tyler
After Ryder left for college, I tried calling her every day, but she ignored me. She even had her parents tell me to stop calling her, after about a month of dodging my calls.
They ended up telling me that it’d be best if I just stayed at the community college, and let Ryder go. They told me she needed time to figure out a life of her own, and that I should do the same.
They were good people, like second parents to me even. I could tell they hated being the messenger, so I didn’t attempt to put them in the middle by hounding them for anymore answers.
Ones they probably didn’t even have.
I ended up staying at the local community college that fall, like her parents had insisted. Every year I waited for Ryder to reach out to me, to change her mind about cutting me out of her life, but she never did.
She ended up changing her number.
I knew it was probably because I wouldn't stop randomly texting her out of the blue, fishing for a response. When my message got kicked back to me, letting me know the number was no longer in service, I officially stopped trying to think up ways to get ahold of her.
I hadn’t even realized how much my life truly consisted of Ryder, until she was gone. All my life's plans had included her, and I suddenly had to change my entire future to one she didn’t even exist in.
After I got my degree, I actually landed a job at our local high school. It was weird being back there at first. Especially when every hallway, and classroom, consisted of a memory I’d shared with Ryder. Yet, somehow, after about a year those memories became easier to avoid as I walked the halls.
I ended up getting a place just a few miles from our folks and I visited them pretty frequently.<
br />
Her parents kept me filled in on her new life in the city, and I acted as if her absence didn’t faze me anymore.
They let me know she’d graduated this year, and was working at an advertisement company, as a marketing manager.
Apparently, she didn't have any plans of moving home. In fact, they said she seemed happy in the city with her roommates.
I wanted to be happy for her, but I wasn't. I was bitter. The truth was, I’d always been hypocritical and selfish when it came to Ryder. Not intentionally but now as I look back on it, it was embarrassingly obvious.
*************************
When Ryder started high school as a freshman, I was already a sophomore and playing football. I’d dated a few girls my freshman year but, since I never saw them outside of school, I didn’t talk about them with Ryder.
In fact, when it came to girls and Ryder, I kept them separate. That’s how I liked to keep things. Ryder was always a piece of my life that I compartmentalized. I kept her separate from many things, until it was inevitable for them to collide.
I knew, with Ryder joining us all in high school, it would put an end to that option.
