Survivor

by Sam Hall

  “Well, I thought we’d do a nice celebration breakfast to start to get to know each other as a family. We have so much to do today, and I don’t really know any of Flick’s preferences. This is different than if you’d been accepted by a local girl. I could ring her mum and get the low down in two seconds flat. What if I order food she doesn’t like? Or if I get the boys to bring beer around and she doesn’t want alcohol served?”

  “Ssh…” he said, closing the door carefully behind him. “Kade’s still asleep. We’re letting him sleep in, and we’ll see if he wants to go to school when he gets up.”

  Renee paused for a moment, looking at her son with a look I knew well. Her eyes shone with pride as she swallowed, then smiled.

  “I always knew you’d make a great dad, darling. Ophelia says you’ve been instrumental in that boy’s recovery. Honey, I’m so proud!”

  “Well, how about you tell me all about it while we give Flick time to have a shower and get dressed?”

  “Oh my god, of course! I’m so sorry. Aidan is the first of my sons to find a mate, so I admit I’m a little flustered. I’m gushing, aren’t I, Aidan? Oh my god.”

  “Siddown, Mum. I’ll make you a cuppa.”

  I beat a hasty retreat, looking blankly at the mirror in the bathroom once I’d closed the door and stripped down. Same old Flick looked back at me, though thankfully, injury free now.

  But I wasn’t the same me, was I? I searched for signs of the new me, of the me who might transform into a whole other thing, but didn’t see it. I just nodded, acknowledging the woman in the mirror for the moment, even if I was still getting to know her, and then had a shower and got dressed.

  “So you might think this is a bit much…”

  Renee stood in front of her car, trying to shield us from the packages inside.

  “Holy shit, Mum. What did you buy?”

  “Well, Kade’s my first grandchild and—”

  “Mum?”

  “I might have gone a little overboard. I saw the two of you together at the mess, and I just knew this would happen, so I did some research and found so many cute things online!”

  So, so many. We peered past the woman to a back seat crammed with gifts.

  “It’s customary that when a man joins a pack that already has children within it, his family brings them something nice. I got something nice.”

  “She looked at so many something nices, she couldn’t decide and then bought them all.”

  We turned to see three tall men walking up the driveway.

  “Honey, we talked about waiting until they got up,” one man said, moving over and wrapping his arm around Renee’s waist.

  “How’re you doing, son?” another man said, placing his hand on Aidan’s shoulder and looking down at him in that manly way men do, before he pulled him in to a backslapping hug. “Sorry,” he said when he finally drew away. “I’m Cooper, Aidan’s dad, and this is Smokey and Vin.” Vin was the guy standing with Renee, shooting me a smile and a wave, but Smokey hung back a little. He stepped forward and offered me his hand when named, but there was something reserved in those grey eyes. This was the parent I needed to impress, who was waiting to see if I was good enough for his boy.

  “So I assume Renee’s brought enough food to feed a horde,” Vin said. She fidgeted a little at that, but was clearly pleased. “Why don’t we get things started and get to know each other a bit better?”

  “I didn’t bring the boys, Aidan’s brothers,” Renee said as we set the table. The guys had gone out the back to cook up a protein rich breakfast on the BBQ that came with the house, leaving the two of us alone. “I figured that might be too much all at once, but they’re terribly excited to meet you and Kade. My youngest, Mikey, is in high school. He’s kept an eye out for Kade at the school, made sure the other kids know not to mess with him. But he seems to be settling in really well?”

  “Yep, I’ve been surprised about all of it. Kade… It’s like this was where he was always supposed to be.”

  “Ophelia thinks he’ll turn when he grows to adulthood. It’s unusual for outsiders, but it must have been some perfect genetic storm to have both of you show such strong potential.”

  “Potential?” I’d been bemused when everyone seemed to think I would turn into this wolf beast thing.

  Except for your ability to communicate with me. And those very nice claws.

  "Well, you're taking a mate before your first shift for one. The fact that you can generate the venom to do so for another. Most members of the community from mixed human heritage find that hard or impossible to do.” Her eyes dropped to the bags she’d brought in, pulling out flour, sugar, eggs, and milk. “Ophelia’s been holding your beast back from the shift, waiting until you’re ready. She said she’s really struggling.” Her hand came to rest on my arm. “She’s strong, your animal. Really strong to push an alpha. It doesn’t have a bearing on people’s standing in the community, but I’m glad Aidan’s got someone capable at his back. He’ll do anything for those he loves, you know that, don’t you? I just want the same from his mate.”

  “Always,” I croaked out. I sounded terrible, but for some reason, my scratchy voice only made her eyes softer. “He deserves everything I have to give. Both of them do.”

  “So things are going well with Peter? That’s good. He was such a sweet boy before… I always thought pairing him up with those friends of his was a mistake.” She wrinkled her nose at the thought of Darren and Brett. “I’m glad he has you. If anyone needed a mate, it’s Peter, but the local girls were put off by…” She winced when she realised where this was going. “Well, you know.”

  God, did everyone talk about his bloody dick? It was extraordinary, but surely people saw there was more to the man than the inches between his legs.

  “Yeah, I do, but he’s an amazing guy. I didn’t know it at the time, but he was the perfect first mate for me. He was patient, sweet, attentive, loving…” I took a deep breath, feeling a huge pressure in my chest, but it was one I longed to keep. “He’s my rock, and I want to be that for him.”

  It was the clearing of his throat that alerted us to the fact that Pete was up. He just stood in the doorway, face still creased from sleep, but it was still there. Bleary eyed or not, he loved me.

  And I loved him.

  I’d been skittish about using the words, afraid I was jumping in and making yet another dumb mistake, but I knew this wasn’t it. It couldn’t be. And even if it was, I had something else now. Inside me, I could feel the long lean form of my Tirian stretching as she regarded Peter’s beast.

  I walked over to him and placed my head on his chest, and his arms went around me automatically.

  “I love you,” I said when I tipped my head back to look at him.

  “I love you too, with everything I’ve got,” he replied, his voice sending delicious thrills through me.

  “Mum, someone’s cooking breakfast,” a querulous little voice came from the bedroom. “Are they making pancakes?”

  We broke apart enough to let Kade in when he staggered out, and I was surprised to see him flop against us, wrapping his arms around both our waists.

  “I am.”

  Kade’s head popped up and around us to peer at Renee.

  It was interesting, she either had good instincts, or someone had been talking to her. She hunched down to his level and waved.

  “Hi, I’m Renee. I’m Aidan’s mum. I’ll be your grandma, if you want?”

  “Grandma? Like Grandma and Grandpa back at h—” He stopped himself. “Back there. They used to see the bruises Dad left on Mum and didn’t do anything about it. They’d give me lollies and try to distract me when I wanted to talk about it. I liked the lollies, but I didn’t like that.”

  I didn’t know Renee at all, but right then, I liked her. She straightened up, frowning, the friendly look lost for a second, then replaced by one that was almost fierce.

  “That doesn’t happen here.”

  “That’s what everyo
ne says. I haven’t seen anyone’s mum with bruises but…” He shook his head. “Aidan has you, but who’s gonna look after Mum?”

  “Everyone does here, honey. I know that's hard to accept. You’ve seen stuff and experienced stuff that no kid should, but that’s OK. We’ll just have to keep proving to you that we’ll look after your mum too. Now, did you want to help me make pancakes? Aidan said you really like them, especially with chocolate chips, and he thinks my pancakes are the best ever.”

  “Even better than Sylvie in the kitchens?” Kade asked suspiciously.

  “Only one way to find out,” she said, holding out a hand.

  He nodded and pulled free of us, then followed her into the kitchen and washed his hands.

  I watched them work, sitting on the couch in Peter’s arms with a growing sense of unreality. I’d had friends twittering on about imposter’s syndrome on social media as war was waging at home, something I’d discarded quickly. Cute cat videos were about all I was up for at the time, something, anything to make me feel better, if even for a second. But now, that feeling of achieving something through pure luck and circumstances rather than hard work unsettled me.

  I was living my dream, but I was terrified of waking up.

  No hard work? What was all that nattering about with the alpha if not hard work? my Tirian asked. And all those many, many mental exercises?

  Sometimes, my beast sounded like a cranky old lady, which made me snort. She saw all my human foibles and rolled her eyes.

  Monkey brains are chaotic and needlessly busy, she replied. Why must today’s bounty be measured by its longevity? I vetted the two of them for you to meet that need.

  So you’re saying they’ll stick around?

  Yes, she said with a sigh. The new one, him I don’t know. He may be just heat fever.

  Sen. His name was a hiss in my mind.

  Yes, Sen.

  We sat down at the big table outside and ate breakfast. The weather was perfect—a bright sunny day with a light breeze, and not too hot.

  “So, Flick, tell us a little about you,” Smokey said.

  “Smokes…” Renee said.

  “What? We know nothing about the girl. I’m just making conversation.”

  “You’re putting Flick on the spot, is what you’re doing,” Vin said. “Don’t worry about Smokey,” he told me. “Has to know everything.”

  “We’ve got a long time to get to know each other. You should join us for our famous Sunday lunches. We cook up a big roast with all the sides,” Cooper said.

  “Dad, we’re still trying to find our feet here,” Aidan said.

  “We’d like that,” I said politely, but some part of me wondered if I would indeed like it. My family had been like this once, but then Mum had died and everyone had slowly drifted away. I didn’t call them. How could I tell them what was going on? And so they stopped calling me. “Just tell us what you’d like us to bring.”

  “Oh, just yourselves,” Renee said with a pleased wave of her hand. “We always cook way too much food.” She shot Aidan a triumphant smile.

  “I grew up in the city, Smokey. Went to university and studied business, but never really did anything with it. I met my ex-husband, Rick, at one of the pubs, and we got together not long afterwards. He…” I glanced at Kade. “I didn’t do anything with my degree, just moved with Rick to Melville.”

  “Melville?” Aidan’s family looked at each other. “That’s where Jules is from. Did you ever run into her?”

  “I…” I pushed my bacon around on my plate. “I didn’t really go anywhere.”

  “Enough of this,” Aidan said with a low growl. “You’re putting her off her food. Dad, if you really wanna know what’s going on, I’ll meet you at the pub and fill you in. Now, let's eat.”

  “How’re you doing?” Peter asked sometime later as we stacked the dishwasher. Aidan was outside with his family, saying an extended goodbye, something that had his eyes rolling.

  “You’ll be back here in a few hours to do the set up for the party,” he’d complained when they asked him to see them off.

  “And we haven’t really had time to catch up,” Cooper said, steering his son outside. “Humour your mother.”

  We already had, seriously. Kade was playing oh so happily with some of the new Star Wars LEGO sets he’d been given. We’d forced her to keep back some of the parcels for later, but he’d been more than delighted with what he had, giving Renee a kiss on the cheek and a hug. He’d even called her Nana Renee in that completely mercenary way kids seem to when toys are on the table.

  “I’m fine. My head is spinning a little, but it’ll be OK. They all seem really nice, though I think I’m gonna have to put some hours in to get Smokey on side.”

  “Smokey’s known for being a bit of a grumpy c—” Peter smiled when he caught himself, eyes flicking to the lounge room. “Prick. A bit of a grumpy prick. He’d fight anyone to protect his family, including his own family. There was a bit of fuss when he and Renee got together. The other guys took a while to warm to him.”

  “So people don’t always find their mates at the same time?”

  “Not normally. Often, they come from the pool of your first heat. That's what it's for, to bring people closer. But you’ve still got to work through the relationship and the feelings. That happens at different times for each person.”

  “So you’re gonna be cool with me…working things out with…” Sen, say Sen, my body said, remembering how he’d felt. “Whoever I feel drawn to.”

  “Of course, love,” he said, leaning forward and kissing my forehead. “We’re here with you on whatever journey you’re on. Now, since you’ve met Renee and the guys and Kade seems to be warming to them, what do you think about them being caretakers when the heat hits?”

  His tone was calm and even, but I watched his lips form the ‘h’ word and felt something hot and liquid shoot through me. He froze at that, then took a deep breath and smiled, slow and sexy. He shoved the plate he had in his hand into the rack and then stepped in close, pulling me against him and kissing me deeply.

  “You smell so fucking hot.”

  “What?” I pushed at him, because Kade was in the lounge room, because the promise of his body was one I enthusiastically wanted to explore and now was not the right time, and because they were always doing this—smelling me. “What is that?”

  “What’s what, love?” he asked, trying to get closer.

  “Why do you…?” I turned to check that Kade was still playing happily. “Why do you keep smelling me?” I hissed. “Do I stink or something?”

  “Not stink,” he said, pulling back with a smile. “When you’re horny, you give off a receptive scent. Doesn’t mean anything, everyone knows that, it just tells us when you’re into it or not. In the end, it's always your choice.”

  “You what…?” My mouth hung open, and then my brain quickly catalogued all the time I’d checked the two of them out. “So you…?” He nodded. “Every time…?” Another nod. “Oh god.”

  “Don’t stress about it, Flick. We were flattered you found us attractive. We knew we couldn’t do anything about it until you were feeling up to it, but…” He watched my horrified expression with amusement. “It gave us some hope as we waited, that maybe someday, you might accept us.”

  I punched him on the arm, which felt a bit like pummelling a brick wall.

  “Why didn’t you tell me?!” I whispered hoarsely.

  “Because…” His eyes flicked to the lounge room as Kade got to his feet, then came back to me when he settled back down. “Because it means nothing. You might have smelt the same way when you met Mick or Shaun. They’d be flattered, but know it was not something they could pursue unless you gave them the go ahead. Women find us attractive all the time.”

  “They do? You’ve…smelled them getting hot and bothered around you?” I said with a growl.

  That earned me an even bigger smile as he pushed me back against the bench, his body wedged against mine.<
br />
  “Are you jealous?”

  “Protective,” I snapped. “No woman should be…” I waved a hand. “Around my mates.”

  “It’s OK. I like you being…protective.” He kissed me, once, twice, each kiss becoming deeper.

  “Mm…what did I miss? Mum and the dads just would not get in the goddamn car and go.”

  We turned to see a smirking Aidan standing in the kitchen.

  “I’ve just found out you’ve been smelling me this whole time. And you knew…” I lowered my voice. “And you knew when I was turned on!”

  “Why’d you tell her that? Rookie move, Pete,” he replied with an exaggerated shake of his head. “Man, did that make getting to sleep a bloody mission. Like, Kade and any other child of ours is always welcome in our bed, but damn was I glad when he decided to start sleeping on his own. It’s gotten to the point where I get hard every time I chuck our sleep shorts in the wash.”

  He chuckled when I glared at him.

  “It was bloody flattering. Every time we took off our shirts…” He moved in close and ran his nose along my jaw. “This hot perfume would fill the room, teasing us with everything, promising us nothing.” He kissed me quickly and pulled away as I snapped my teeth at him. “That’s what’s gonna bring all the boys to your yard when you go into heat. It’s already started. You’ll be able to do a few shifts at the mess hall, but not much more than that or you’ll have a riot on your hands. When you shift, the scent will flood the whole town, leave the single guys aching and attendance at the sex club will be off the charts.”

  “Sex club!?” I hissed.

  “Good one,” Peter rumbled. “Who’s the rookie now?”

  “Kade,” I called out, “I’m just going outside with the guys to get things ready for tonight. Are you good?”

  “Yeah, Mum. Nana Renee got me this most amazing LEGO set. It has Han Solo and Obi Wan Kenobi—”

  “That’s awesome, champ,” I said, walking into the living room. “We’ve just got to do a few things, and then you can tell us all about it.”