Crucifixed (Royal Bastards MC: NYC Book 2)

by B. B. Blaque

  Casket yelled at a prospect to bring me a shot, and the kid showed up with a new handle of Jack and a glass. I cracked the seal on the bottle, guzzled back a mouthful, and lit a smoke. It didn’t make me feel any better.

  “Okay, enough with the shit. What the fuck is goin’ on? Where is Snaps?” I tipped the bottle again and looked around for FOCUS. He musta been inside because I didn’t see him. “Take me to her now.”

  Did we scare her too much? Did I fuck up right outta the gate?

  I followed Casket through the door into the clubhouse and barely noticed anyone around. I only watched his patch as we walked to my room in the back. He stopped at the door and looked to me. “Brother . . . go in quietly . . . she’s a fuckin’ mess right now. Deal with her, and then we’ll talk about the rest.”

  When I walked through the door, Fi was curled up in a ball at the far corner of my bed. She was tremblin’ and jumped when she saw me walk in.

  “Hey, baby . . . what’s goin’ on?” I sat down softly on the edge and she scooted back as far as she could. She’d never once been afraid of me, and my heart cracked when I saw the look in her eyes. “Everything’s gonna be okay . . . no one’s gonna hurt you. I got you.”

  She started to hyperventilate when she tried to speak and I laid my hand out to her. I felt like I was tryin’ to coax a kitten out of a hidin’ place.

  “You did this to me . . . that guy . . . the guard . . . why didn’t you just let me go?”

  I could barely understand her, but got the gist. “What fuckin’ guy, Fi? One of my brothers who brought you here? Did one of them hurt you? So help me God, I’ll kill him!”

  Was it Hazard? The Bishop?

  Wasn’t FOCUS or Casket.

  Who else knew?

  “I saw him . . . he had a vest like yours, but I knew the voice as soon as I heard it. Oh, my God, that voice!” The shakin’ got worse and her legs were pulled tighter to her chest. “Why, Gio? I’m sorry I hurt you, but why did you do this?”

  A vest like mine? Who the fuck is gonna die now?

  “You need to know I did not do this to you . . . would never do this to you!” I stood up faster than I probably should’ve, but I needed to take care of shit. I was just short of losin’ control. “I love you and always have. Hold on to that while I go find out what the fuck is goin’ on. I love you, Fi! I did not do this, but I’m gonna find out right now who did!”

  I stormed outta the bedroom and stomped down the hall until I was in the main room of the clubhouse. There were balls on the pool table, and I grabbed one and slammed it against a door.

  “Who the fuck did this to her?” I picked up another one and threw it against the wall and broke a mirror and neon light. “Which one of you motherfuckers is gonna get Crucifixed for this!”

  FOCUS ran up to me and almost caught a right hook to the face with the bottle of Jack

  “Fuck, yank! You need to take your crazy Sicilian ass outside now! You wanna crucify a son of a bitch, I’ll get ya the nails and hammer, but you are scarin’ the fuck outta everyone!” He pushed the bottle into my chest and grabbed the back of my head. “Drink!”

  He tipped the bottle up to me and yanked my arm until I was out the door and back in the dark garage. My adrenaline had been workin’ overtime, and I didn’t know who I could trust in that second except for FOCUS and Casket. I took a deep breath, lit a smoke, and stared through FOCUS

  “Who am I gonna kill? One of our brothers did this to her and I wanna know who.”

  He started to walk toward the back office in the garage, and I followed. When we got to the door, he looked at me and put a hand on my shoulder. “Don’t go off half-cocked. If you want a crucifixion you can’t just go at him like a rabid dog.”

  When I got into the office, my wrath couldn’t be contained, and I slammed the chair back until that motherfucker’s head hit the wall.

  “You cocksuckin’ piece of shit!” I pulled my fist back and nailed him in the middle of the face. He’d already been worked over pretty good, but it was nothin’ compared to what I was gonna do. “I knew you were a scumbag! Your ass shoulda been outta here a long time ago. Now, you’re gonna pay with your life! Do you wanna explain why?”

  “Eh, I didn’t know it was your nun . . . lucky me, huh? If I woulda known you’d tapped that, I woulda really fucked her.” Rattler’s lips were busted and his words were slurred, but he was bein’ the same asshole he always was. “Wonder if you’ll still taste my cum when you kiss her.”

  That prick knew he was gonna die and had basically just said a prayer for it.

  “FOCUS . . . I’ll take the nails now.” I lit another smoke and thought for a second. “Bring me nine of ‘em.”

  Hazard and Casket left the office and went to get things set up. We’d done it before, and they knew where I was headed with shit. Rattler does too. FOCUS stood behind the chair and rolled him outta the office. I couldn’t wait for the first nail to sink in.

  Rattler was a scumbag, but to get in bed with the fuckin’ Catholic Church after knowin’ my history took a major set of balls. It was time to clean house. I only wish we’d done it sooner. Before Fi was involved.

  I looked around the shop table until I found my gloves and the big clawed hammer. I didn’t wanna waste too much time on him. There wasn’t a lot to say and I needed to get back to Fi. She was my priority and Rattler was just another obstacle.

  When I got over to where the guys were, Rattler had been untied and was bein’ held on a few pallets. Casket and Hazard were each holdin’ a leg and FOCUS was kneelin’ on his arms and sittin’ on his chest. He wasn’t gonna move that big hillbilly offa him before I was done.

  “I don’t wanna hear your mouth . . . you’re dead to me and dead men tell no tales.” I squatted by his head and drove the first nail into the webbing of one of his beefy fingers. He screamed and I slammed the hammer into his mouth. “Shut the fuck up! I told you. I don’t wanna hear you!”

  I nailed the webbing between each of his fingers to the wood and he passed out from the pain. Each time the hammer came down, it broke a finger or two until they were a gnarled mess. He wasn’t gonna need ‘em and I didn’t stop until all eight were done. That’s when he started to squirm.

  “Oh . . . what’s the matter, tough guy? That nutsack climbin’ up inside ya about now?” I undid his belt and started to yank down his pants. “Don’t worry. I’m just about done with ya. Figured the last thing you’ll remember is how you didn’t fuck her and how you really fucked yourself.”

  I positioned the nail over his balls and swung the hammer like I was swingin’ for the fences at Yankee Stadium. Rattler’s reflexes made him try to grab his nuts and he ripped one of his hands free. That had to hurt. They always do it. FOCUS punched him in the face and I continued.

  “Sorry, I’m tapped outta my unholy water and barbed wire . . . been a busy day. Hey, FOCUS, man, can you gimme your lighter?” He reached into his side pocket and handed me the cigar torch. When the hiss started, Rattler squealed. “Ahh, good for you! You remember how the Crucifixed goes . . . time for some body modification.”

  I took the special crucifix out of my pocket, put on my gloves, and started to heat the metal until it was almost red hot. Then I squatted over Rattler’s head.

  “Through him . . .” I pressed the cross into his skin and branded him through the forehead. He was cryin’ like the little fuckin’ bitch he was. “With him . . .”

  I walked around to his side and FOCUS stepped back so I could lean over his chest and whisper in an ear, “You shoulda left while you still could . . . you know this next part, but I’ll tell you anyway. In him.”

  The blade of my knife was driven deep into his side. I pulled back and did it again and again and dropped it to the floor. I was done. He wasn’t just dead to me. He was dead to the world and we’d make sure it was like he’d never lived to begin with. No funeral. No death certificate. No body to be found.

  “You guys take care of the rest of this mess. I gott
a get back to Fi and I’m done dickin’ around.”

  I wanted her to be afraid of the Catholic Church, not of me. Not of us.

  Time for damage control.

  21

  The Oath

  I went directly behind the bar and scrubbed my hands and arms to get rid of Rattler’s venomous blood. Chances were high that I had it on my face, so I splashed it with water and wiped hard with a paper towel. Bein’ covered in blood wouldn’t be a good way to calm her down and make shit right.

  What did he mean about tastin’ his cum in her mouth?

  What the fuck did he do to my Gingersnap?

  I’m sure I was practically runnin’ through the clubhouse like lightning to get to her, but it sure didn’t feel like it. It seemed as slow as walkin’ through Atlantic City taffy. When I got to the door, I stopped long enough to take a quick breath so I wouldn’t bound through and scare her any worse than I already had. I knocked and Magic’s ol’ lady—Lexington—answered the door.

  “Crucifix, she’s calmed down a little, but make sure you’re gentle. That poor girl is so confused right now. Make sure she knows how you feel . . . quietly.”

  I kissed her on the head and stepped inside. “No worries, Lexi . . . I can handle it from here. Thanks, kid.”

  Everyone must know she’s the one—the nun—the one I’ve stayed single for all these years.

  Fi was still in the corner of my bed, but instead of wrapped in a tight little ball, she was sittin’ cross-legged with the sheets draped around her. She didn’t look nearly as tight and tense as she had when I left. Thanks, Lex.

  “Hey . . . mind if I come sit?” I walked toward the bed slowly and she waved out an arm to invite me over. “You don’t have to worry ‘bout that asshole anymore . . . don’t waste any prayers on him, Fi. You know more than anyone, he doesn’t deserve even one.”

  I sat carefully on the edge and she glanced over and then away.

  “I’ve been praying for you, Crucifix . . . for us.” She paused and took a deep breath. “I’ll probably go to Hell for saying this . . . but do you ever think that maybe we weren’t meant to be born . . . you and me . . . people like us? They said we were motherless and that Mary and God would be our parents . . . that we owed them . . . all of them . . . and we’ve both paid so much for that. Look where it’s gotten us.”

  It was somethin’ I’d thought about over the years—not her, but me. When I got with the Bastards, I realized I was meant to be alive. Every time I’d seen Fi over the years, even if she ripped my heart out, I knew I was supposed to be.

  “Baby . . . you and me . . . we were meant to be. I don’t doubt that for a second. I’m not sure what all you know about the bullshit that happened today, but it proved one thing to me.” I paused and fiddled for a cigarette when she cut in softly.

  “What did it prove?”

  “It proved that no matter how much you’ve trashed my heart out over the years . . . and that’s not a judgment call, just the truth . . . no matter what . . . I would give my life for you . . . faster than I would for any of my brothers . . . in the blink of an eye. If it’d keep you safe, there’d be no price too big to pay.” I lit the smoke I’d been holdin’ and reached my hand toward her slowly. “Fuck, I love you, Fi. No amount of feet walkin’ out the door will ever make my heart go with ‘em. I’m sure you’ve got a ton of questions and you might not like all the answers I got for ya, so I’ll say it as many times as it takes . . . I love you in a way I can barely understand. Fuck, I even prayed today if that tells ya anything.”

  Her hand fell loosely to the side of a knee, but didn’t reach over to me.

  “You . . . prayed?” Her blue eyes glistened and her voice was just above a whisper. “What did you pray, G . . .?”

  I didn’t move my hand from the bed, but took a drag off my smoke and ran that hand through my hair. There was so much she didn’t know and stuff I didn’t either. She could only handle a small piece of it at a time.

  “Ah . . . ya know . . . I asked God to make sure you were safe . . . told him not to worry about me. I prayed those prayers for you a lot over the years, and then one day . . . I just stopped. I’m sure you have all kinds of shit goin’ through your head about what went down. I just felt like it was a good time to ask for a little help, ya know? I’m sure it’s all funguliated in your mind . . . what’s what, who’s who, and who’s a rotten piece of shit. I guarantee it’s not us. That guy . . . not sure if you even know his name . . . the one who bought you. He’s not a piece of shit either. He was a gift from God . . . on our side, if ya can believe that one.”

  Fi was slowly unwindin’ and stretched a leg out a little. She kept lookin’ at me quick and then away. We’d been in a lot of fucked-up positions over the years, but nothin’ like that.

  “The Bishop. That’s his name. He’s really scary . . . but he didn’t hurt me. That other one . . . the guy who was wearing a vest like yours . . . he touched me in ways . . .” Her eyes drifted away and she brought a hand to her mouth. I could hear the tears in her voice as she tried to speak. “Only you’ve ever touched me like that, Crucifix. Why did you let him do that? He was there night and day after you kicked me out . . . you never came, though.”

  Motherfucker! I’m glad he’s dead!

  “Where was he? I wouldn’t let anyone do anything to you!” I pulled back quick and stopped myself before goin’ off. Don’t get up! Don’t yell. “I didn’t have anything to do with any of the shit that went on. Until that nun came to visit me at the Mounds, I was tryin’ . . . unsuccessfully . . . to get over you. She told me about what those fuckin’ black and white cookies were plannin’ on doin’, and I hooked up with The Bishop to get you the fuck outta there! I don’t know how the fuck Rattler . . . that scumbag you saw . . . got involved, but it was not club related I can tell ya that much.”

  Her hands were runnin’ back and forth on a leg and she shook her head hard. Then she looked stronger and the tears stopped.

  “Sister Isabella came to you? I told her everything when you sent me away . . . we knew something bad was happening. I can’t believe she came to your club for me . . . that you came.” Finally, she reached a hand to mine. “That Rattler guy was guarding me at the old rectory. He brought me to the auction . . . he almost raped me . . . just about did in every way he could rape someone who’s supposed to be a virgin. Then some lady who works for that Bishop took me away from him. I didn’t see him until I was brought here. When I saw that it was him . . . the guard . . . and he was at your clubhouse . . .” She squeezed my hand. “Crucifix . . . I thought it was because I hurt you one too many times . . . that you snapped. I thought . . . I was afraid that guy sold me to you. I don’t know . . . that you were going to kill me or something. I know it sounds crazy, but the whole thing is nuts.”

  I patted her hand and opened an arm to bring her over for a hug. When Fi leaned into my chest, I finally started to breathe.

  “Baby, I would never harm you. You’re my oldest connection in the entire world . . . my first real friend . . . my first and only love. When I didn’t have a family . . . you were it, kid. We were all we had.” I pulled back, kissed the top of her head, and stroked her hair. “Are you gettin’ it now? You’re the most important person who’s ever been in my life. I love the fuck outta you and have from the first time I shared my food with you.”

  She looked up to me while her grip around me tightened. “I love you too, Crucifix . . . please, let me try to make it up to you. It’s all my fault.”

  There’ll be time for penance later. Not now.

  “We’re not gonna go playin’ the blame game. I also told ya you might not like some of the shit I gotta tell ya. You didn’t ask, but I’ll try to make it as digestible as I can.” I slid back a little so I could look at her. “Some of the stuff . . . well, in a nutshell . . . I wanted to scare the hell outta you . . . better said, I wanted to scare that fuckin’ Catholic Church outta you. With all the shit I’ve said, you gotta know I couldn’t just keep
lettin’ you leave my life like through a turnstile. I was too close to losin’ you this time, Fi . . . like forever. There was no way I was gonna let it happen again. I left shit in The Bishop’s hands . . . you’d have to know him to understand. Nothin’ he did was without my okay. He had to protect his business and I had to protect you and teach some very bad people some life lessons. I was more than good with the guys kidnappin’ you back here where you’d be safe. It coulda been done in a less traumatic way, I get that now, but there was a point to be made. If I’d fuckin’ known about that motherfuckin’ cocksucker . . . well, he’s not gonna bother us anymore. Lombardi, Foley, and that pedophile whore . . . they’re out of our lives forever too. You’re stuck with me, Fi. I’ve proven I’d walk through Hell to get you, and I ain’t gonna let you go.”

  She shoved her head into my chest and squeezed as tightly as she ever had in all our years.

  “How about . . . I break . . .” Before she could finish her statement, I turned her face to me.

  “Oh, no, you don’t. If you’re gonna say those words, you better look me dead in the eyes when you do.”

  Without a second’s hesitation, she stared deeply into my eyes and said, “I’m breaking all of my vows for you . . . Crucifix. Every one of them. I’m never going back.”

  She could tell me she loves me all day long, but saying those words one time from her heart said a lot more.

  “I love you too, Snaps, and I’m not gonna let go of you, no matter what.” I pulled her in and whispered, “Ya know, when you asked if I thought we weren’t meant to be born . . . my answer is ‘fuck, no!’ We’re meant for each other and have been since the second I saw you.”

  22

  How Did You Love?

  I stood there holdin’ her and couldn’t figure if it was more that I was doin’ it for her or to her for myself. With Fi in my arms, in my room, and knowin’ she wasn’t gonna put up a fight, I was finally dialin’ back the rage and pain I’d been feelin’ for so long.