Ledman Pickup

by Tom Lichtenberg

Twelve

  Kandhi was not surprised when they tried to jerk her around at the rental car office as well. It had been one of those nights, now turned into one of those days. She had the receipt on her UPD to prove she'd ordered a sedan, and still they tried to stick her with a ridiculous economy car.

  "I'm not driving across your God-forsaken state in a God-damn economy car,” she told the stubborn gal at the U-Pick-It desk. "I want the sedan. I ordered the sedan and I want the sedan."

  "So sorry,” the bespectacled clerk replied, not at all sorry in the least. "We're all out of sedans."

  "Then give me a damn pickup,” Kandhi retorted, and that was how she ended up with the cherry red monster truck, and the pent up frustrations from the whole annoying venture fueled her eighty mile per hour race across the desert and the foothills, all the way to Wetford with the stereo blaring and the sunshine glaring in her eyes. Enough is enough, she muttered. I didn't come all this way for bullshit.

  She stopped only twice; once at the drive-thru of a Burger Joint and wolfed down a couple of biscuit things with spicy meat and yellow stuff, and then again at the drive-thru of a Coffee Town and pulled away with a couple of triple espressos.

  "I've got a feeling I'm going to need it,” she allowed herself. Her UPD had the directions memorized and whispered each turn gently into her mind.

  'You're going to take that exit, sixty-three, and bear to the left. It's going to be a slight jog onto River Rock Boulevard. There you go. Good job. Now just stay on the right. A hundred ten meters. See that sign up ahead? Slide off into that driveway, slow across those train tracks. Here you are. This is the place.'

  She nodded her thanks to the gadget and patted her front jeans pocket where it sat. Ledman Storage and Pickup was the sign on the road. She pulled up next to a white pickup truck and barely registered the small gray car that was parked next to it. She got out and marched up to the green metal door and started banging. It was eight fifteen in the morning. Nobody came to open the door.

  Zoey was still sitting in her car and hoped for a moment that the driver of the bright red truck would turn out to be the boss lady. She could hardly believe her eyes when she recognized Kandhi Clarke. Her first thought was, “oh good, now maybe we'll get somewhere”, but her second thought was, “oh no, what the heck is she doing here? That device must be even more important than I thought!”

  She was paralyzed with indecision. Should she go out and expose herself to Kandhi? That would be admitting her failure. But if not that, then what? Hide out in the car and let Kandhi find the package? “Must plan,” she scolded herself. “Marshal facts. Put things together. You can do it. First things first,” she reminded herself, but now she didn't know the first thing about what the first thing should be! “Wait and see,” she decided. I'll just wait and see, and she hunkered down a bit behind the driver's seat and pulled her jacket up around her chin.

  Kandhi was not amused. She pounded on the door and yelled at the door and marched around the building just as Zoey had done an hour or so before, and just as Zoey had experienced, she made no progress until another delivery truck pulled in. This driver didn't bother even pretending to notice Kandhi. He just swung up on the dock and lifted the gate door open and started throwing his boxes into the building. Junior and Rolando came running up but the guy blocked their way, didn't want their help and didn't wait for them to even sign his scanner. He just heaved the last of the boxes onto the dock, climbed back in his seat and drove away. Junior and Rolando started dragging the boxes in and didn't see Kandhi until she was right there in front of them.

  "Hey!" she shouted, "I'm looking for my package"

  "Damn,” said Junior, "It's another one, just like the first."

  "Are you sure it's not the same one?" Rolando asked.

  "No I'm not,” Junior said and he reached for the overhead door handle and pulled it down. The thing came rattling down and slammed shut almost on Kandhi's shoes. She was left outside standing there, but this was the final straw as far as she was concerned. She just reached down, grabbed that handle, and jerked the door open again, so hard the thing flew up into the rafters. Junior and Rolando were standing there looking like they'd just been caught by a teacher with their pants down around their ankles.

  "What the fuck?" Kandhi declared, as she marched right into the building.

  "What kind of a place is this?" she demanded, and Junior mumbled something as Kandhi brushed right past him and headed for the only desk, which she had noticed was near the front door. Once there she grabbed the front door handle and flung it open as well. Then she walked around behind the desk and switched on the computer terminal sitting there.

  "You can't do that,” Junior said, walking up behind her.

  "Oh, you're going to help me now?" she snapped, turning towards him. "Figured I was going to have to help myself, the way you tried to chop off my feet back there a minute ago."

  "Company policy,” he stuttered. "Nobody’s allowed behind that yellow line back there."

  "You even see that yellow line?" asked Rolando, who'd come up and now stood next to Junior. The two folded their arms across their chest in an attempt to puff up and look scary. Kandhi was not impressed.

  "I'm looking for my package,” she said. "It's about this big,” she explained, gesturing its dimensions. "Scanned here two days ago from Austin on its way to San Francisco. It was never supposed to be anywhere near here, but here it was, and it's probably still here since it's never been recorded anywhere since. You know what I'm talking about?"

  "Uh uh,” the two men said in unison. "You'll have to talk to the boss lady about that."

  "Oh yeah?" Kandhi asked. "Where is this boss lady then?"

  "She's not here,” Rolando said.

  "So you'll have to wait,” Junior continued.

  "We got a chair over there,” Rolando gestured to a moldy old lump in the corner.

  "Got a chair right here,” Kandhi replied, sitting down behind the desk. "And since your boss lady's not around, I guess I'll just have to help myself,” and she started typing on the keyboard.

  "You can't do that,” Junior said again, but he made no motion to stop her. After a few moments and less than a hundred keys pressed, Kandhi looked up at them again and said,

  "Still here, how about that. Even your stupid half-ass software knows that much. So which one of you is going to bring it to me."

  Junior and Rolando looked at each other and shrugged. Kandhi got up.

  "Figures,” she told them. "Then I'll just have to go find it myself,” and she headed back into the rows of dusty gray shelves. Junior and Rolando followed behind her, nudging each other but neither one could think of the right thing to do. Kandhi had whipped out her UPD and was talking to it.

  "Hey you,” she said, "think you can scan around and find that code?" and after a moment she spoke again, saying, "appreciate it.” Kandhi held the UPD palm up and let it lead her around the warehouse. In no time at all it had picked up a signal, and they ended up in the same corner of the building where Leonora, just the day before, had ripped the box open and left it lying on the floor, where Kandhi found it, and picked it up. She held it out to Junior and Rolando and said, very calmly,

  "Now one of you is going to tell me what the fuck is going on around here, and where you put my device."

  "I told you that thing was evil,” Rolando muttered.

  "What did you say?" Kandhi walked right up to him and Rolando seemed to shrink in front of her.

  "I never touched it,” he said, "It wasn't me. It was her. The boss lady. She's the one."

  "What is he talking about?" Kandhi asked, turning to Junior.

  "It's the truth,” he said, "Ronnie here wanted to smash it, but she said no and she took it out of the box, whatever it was. Looked like a piece of black plastic is all. She put it in her pocket. We never saw it since, right Ronnie?"

  "Never saw it again,” he nodded.

  "So you wanted to smash it,” Kandhi said slowly, considering,
and then she yelled "Is that what you do around here? Smash up people's shit? Who the fuck are you? I mean, for Christ's sake. Do you even know? Do you have any idea? No, no, of course you don't. Fucking morons! Well, let me tell you. That thing, as you call it, that thing is worth more than your whole goddamn families have ever been worth since the whole world began altogether. You better find some lawyers and you better find them fast, because you, and you, and your boss lady, and whoever else has anything to do with this fucking hell hole is going to pay and pay and pay if I don't get my product back and I don't get it quick!"

  "Um, Kandhi?" The meek voice barely echoed through the building. Kandhi wheeled around to see Zoey weaving her way toward her.

  "Did you find it?" Zoey asked. Kandhi was almost speechless.

  "Zoey Bridges!" she finally said. "What the fuck?"

  "Did you find the package?" Zoey asked again and Kandhi, still clutching the empty box, nearly threw it at Zoey's head.

  "Yeah, I found the package,” she yelled, "and it's fucking empty! How do you like that? These assholes are telling me their boss decided to open it up like Christmas and keep it like it was her own damn present! Can you fucking believe that? And what the hell are you doing here anyway?"

  "I was hoping to find it,” Zoey replied. "I drove all night."

  "I'll bet you did,” Kandhi snapped. "You lied to us. You lied to Chris. And I'll deal with you later." Turning back to the hapless workers she barked, "Now one of you, I don't care which, is going to take me to your god damn boss lady and you're going to take me there now."

  "Can't do that,” Junior protested. "We've got to be here."

  "I'm sure your partner can handle whatever,” Kandhi said, and she pointed at Junior and said, "You. You're coming with me." She turned and walked toward the front door, passing right by the dazed and barely awake Zoey, with Junior following obediently. Zoey shuffled after them as they left the building and headed towards Kandhi's truck.

  "Don't need to drive,” Junior called out. "She lives down the street."

  "All right,” Kandhi said, "then we'll walk. You lead the way."

  Junior took them around the corner and across the tracks, to the lone apartment building standing there behind the abandoned railway station. Kandhi's thought was "what a dump," and it was. The exterior - an drab gray to begin - hadn't been painted in decades. The lobby was deserted, its peeling pale yellow linoleum tiles revealing raw dirt underneath. There was something like an office with a frosted glass door but clearly it hadn't been occupied for years. The door was left open and there was nothing in the room. They trudged up three flights of stairs which were metal and gray like an indoor fire escape. When they came to Leonora's apartment, Junior pointed it out and tried to step aside, but Kandhi ordered him to knock. Reluctantly, he obeyed. No answer. She made him knock again, then call out to Leonora. Again there was nothing.

  "That's how it is with you people,” Kandhi snorted, pushing Junior aside. She didn't even bother to knock, just turned the door handle and watched it swing open. Junior gasped. He was sure that this wasn't allowable either. He was startled again when he cautiously peeked in after Kandhi had strode on ahead. The apartment was spotless, and it didn't even reek. He thought for a moment he had shown them the wrong place and double checked the number on the door. He gave a low whistle and went in.

  "I can't believe it,” he mumbled.

  "I'm not seeing your boss lady,” Kandhi said, returning back to the front after inspecting each of the three rooms.

  "This isn't like her,” Junior said.

  "I don't know what you're talking about,” Kandhi said, "but you better start making sense in a hurry. I want to see your owner, your Mister Ledman or whoever it is."

  "Kind of surprising,” Zoey said, looking around. "You wouldn't expect it to be in such good shape. I'm impressed."

  "Are you still here?" Kandhi replied. "I don't remember inviting you along."

  "I just thought,” Zoey began, but Kandhi interrupted,

  "I didn't know you were still doing that kind of thing,” she snapped, walking out of the apartment. She stood on the landing for a moment, trying to remember to breathe. She stared out the grimy window at the view of the train tracks meandering off in the distance. For a moment she thought of what it must have looked like when it was all still brand new, when the railroad had first come to town, and what an event that must have been, and how shiny and new, and how powerful, and how revolutionary, and how such a huge mass of metal and grease and dirt and smoke had transformed the entire country around there and turned it into something it should never have been - viable and inhabitable by millions. And then a small voice drifted into her head. It was her You, and it was telling her something. More like it was asking her something. It said, “what is so great about Green Bay, Wisconsin?”