Fever Dreams

by Nicole Jordan

  Ryder made a low scoffing sound. “Your husband evidently was a terrible lover.”

  Eve gave a careless shrug. “But then I hardly have the right to complain. What is the saying? If you make your bed, you must lie in it? My bed was not…exactly pleasant, but I knew from the beginning that the bargain I made came with obligations.”

  Her tone was light, but there was considerable dignity in that quiet declaration. Even so, Ryder wasn’t about to let her comment pass without an explanation. “What do you mean, your bed wasn’t pleasant?”

  The emotions on her face were too complex to sort out. “Most wives do not enjoy the marriage bed, I understand.”

  “Perhaps not, but there’s no reason for it. A man should be concerned with his woman’s pleasure.”

  Her amused laugh held the tiniest hint of bitterness. “Richard never subscribed to that particular theory, certainly.”

  “Eve, don’t talk in riddles,” Ryder said with impatience. “What the hell did he do to you?”

  She paused. “Nothing, really.”

  “I don’t believe that.”

  Her cheeks flushed as she averted her gaze. “If you must know…Richard always considered me merely a receptacle for his seed in order to sire an heir. He always…finished quickly, but it was still painful. To be truthful, I was grateful that he satisfied his usual carnal needs with his mistresses.”

  Something clutched at Ryder’s heart, made his chest go tight.

  Eve must have misinterpreted his silence, for her chin rose. “Don’t you dare pity me, Ryder.”

  “I’m not pitying you. I’m angry as hell. I would like to strangle that bastard for causing you pain. It’s fortunate he’s already dead, or I might be tempted to speed his demise.”

  Her wry smile made his chest hurt. “Did no one ever tell you it is sinful to speak so scathingly of the dead?” she teased.

  “I don’t give a damn. That bloody boor made you afraid of physical intimacy, didn’t he?”

  She didn’t reply.

  “I could change that,” Ryder said softly.

  Her eyes flashed back up to his, full of vulnerability. It was a long time before she spoke. “You know very well this conversation is wholly improper.”

  His glance lowered to her elegant hands, with their long delicate fingers. She was twisting them together unconsciously, betraying her agitation. That and her prim reply only confirmed his suspicions: that despite being married for six years, Eve was still sexually inexperienced.

  “It’s clear you know little about passion,” Ryder said finally, taking a step closer. “Lovemaking can be remarkable with a man who cares enough to give you pleasure. I want to show you, Eve.”

  She stared up at him, her eyes blue pools of uncertainty. Heat and desire and tenderness stung Ryder’s body at the sight. Yet he forced himself to remain still, letting Eve make the first move.

  His heart contracted when slowly, with trancelike gentleness, she reached up and touched his cheek. “You are such a kind man, Ryder.”

  Ryder clenched his fists to contain the emotions knotting inside him. “I’m not particularly kind.”

  “Yes, you are. You were always kind to me from the moment we met. But what you are suggesting now…”

  She stood very still, looking vulnerable and soft and more beautiful than any woman had a right to be, her hair gleaming in the low light like molten gold. He imagined the incredible pleasure of touching it, of tangling the tresses in his hands.

  Ryder took another step closer. He wanted to hold Eve. Wanted to fill his hands with the textures of her. Even more, he wanted more to show her the pleasure she had never known.

  What if he yielded to his desires? an insistent voice prodded. It might be too soon to act. He might frighten her away. Then again, if he took great care, her response might be everything he had dreamed it would be.

  The thought sent tenderness and desire warring brutally in his midsection, making his whole body burn for her.

  Yet he could tell Eve was wondering something similar. Even without touching her, he knew she was trembling. His senses registered each shiver of her body, every pulse. And he felt the deep primal response in his own body. The ache in his gut grew deeper and sharper.

  Of its own volition, his hand lifted to touch that shining fall of golden hair. It was indeed as silky as he imagined, the strands caressing his skin and curling around his fingers, tantalizing him with their softness.

  Gliding slowly, he reached higher and traced Eve’s ear with his fingertips, then her delicate jawline. His desire to hold her had become a need so powerful, he wasn’t certain he could control it.

  Watching him helplessly, Eve sensed Ryder’s struggle, saw it in his midnight eyes, yet she had no idea how to respond. As his long fingers grazed her jaw in the lightest caress, her every instinct cried danger, but she couldn’t seem to move, couldn’t speak. She was spellbound by his tenderness.

  Shifting his hand, he brushed her cheek, his lingering fingers startlingly hot against her skin. The simple intimacy of the caress made her tremble, and she fought the need to turn her face into the cradle of his palm. Her heart was pounding madly, her body vibrating with currents of excitement.

  Did he know how swiftly, how fiercely, her heart was beating?

  As if wanting to discover for himself, he shifted his touch lower, along the column of her throat. When his fingers found the beat of her pulse there, she saw Ryder’s mouth curve with the faintest hint of satisfaction.

  Of course he knew how he was affecting her.

  Defenselessly Eve gazed up at his dark face, seeing the slash of hard lines that made his features so virile and arresting, the vibrant obsidian eyes that held her captive. A woman could get lost in eyes that black and deep.

  But it would be a colossal mistake to let this continue.

  “Ryder…I cannot.” Tearing her gaze from his, Eve turned away.

  His fingers closed gently over her arm, holding her fast. “Don’t go.”

  A moment later she felt Ryder’s arms fold around her from behind. Eve went rigid, suddenly unable to breathe.

  His lips pressed against her hair, making her heart gallop even faster.

  “You know I would never hurt you. Don’t you, Eve?”

  She couldn’t speak, so she gave the barest of nods.

  “You needn’t fear me.”

  She didn’t fear Ryder in the least; she feared what he made her feel. Tremors coursed through her body, making her weak.

  She knew she should put an end to this madness, yet she couldn’t seem to pull away. She was surrounded by his strength and warmth and arousing male scent. Unable to resist.

  For a long while he simply held her, his hard frame pressed against her back. His body radiated heat even through their layers of clothing; she was keenly aware of the feverish sensation.

  She had never expected to experience Ryder’s embrace again, but the feel of his muscular arms around her was incredibly arousing. Just as it had been that summer day in the meadow. She still remembered his embrace, how it felt to lie beneath his hard body, hot and vital and strong.

  He was infinitely more gentle now, though. One arm rested just beneath her breasts while the other curved lightly around her waist. Then barely moving, he splayed his hand to cover her abdomen. He held it there, letting her feel his touch through her nightclothes.

  When she didn’t protest, he slid his hand even lower to the juncture of her thighs, caressing her woman’s mound.

  Her heart leaped in alarm, as did her body, but his embrace never faltered. “Does this frighten you, Eve?” he murmured against her ear.

  Yes, it frightens me. Yet she didn’t want him to stop. “I…don’t know,” she whispered.

  His voice was the texture of rough velvet as he nuzzled her temple. “Do you trust me, Eve?”

  “I…yes,” she answered truthfully.

  “Good.”

  Slowly he unbuttoned her silk wrapper and slipped it off her shoulde
rs to pool on the carpet.

  His hands slid around her waist again, but this time he reached upward, skating his palms over her thinly clad breasts, stroking her through the fine cambric of her nightdress. A soft gasp escaped her as her nipples budded instantly at the delicate pressure.

  Ryder went still, waiting. Fearing he might stop, Eve arched slightly, pushing against his palms, wanting him to touch her more.

  Obligingly he cupped the quivering mounds of her breasts with both hands, his thumbs slowly circling her nipples. “Does this feel pleasurable?”

  There was no need for her to reply, since he already knew the answer. She felt a bright, warm stirring of pleasure that rippled though her entire body. A delicious sensation of weakness, a sweet restless ache that pulsed deep inside her, centering in the feminine recesses between her thighs.

  And Ryder seemed to know exactly what she was experiencing—as if his instincts were finely tuned to her every desire. His caresses moved again, down over her midriff, then lower still, seeking her most sensitive woman’s flesh.

  When a whisper of cool air brushed her legs, Eve realized that Ryder was raising the skirt of her nightdress. Shock flickered through her, yet she did nothing to stop him. Her hands hovered at her sides, as if not knowing what to do with themselves.

  When he had raised the fabric to her hips, baring all her feminine secrets, Ryder nuzzled her hair again. “Close your eyes, Eve. Don’t think. Just close your eyes and feel.”

  Helpless to fight her own desire, she did as he commanded. She felt Ryder at her back, his body pressed fully against her, making her aware of the hard length of his erection beneath his satin evening breeches. She should have been alarmed, should have been cringing from the shocking contact, yet she only pulled in a deep, shuddering breath.

  His fingers caressed her naked thigh as he whispered in her ear, “Your skin is so soft.”

  His touch is so soft, Eve thought dreamily. His warm hand on her flesh was gentle, searing, filling her body with a tight, hot longing she had never before known.

  His embrace engulfed her with tenderness. She wondered how a man so hard, so dangerous, could be so tender. His hands were arousing sparks everywhere he touched, yet gentle enough to make her feel as fragile as spun glass.

  Then his fingers slid along her cleft, spreading slowly to cup her sex. At the fiery sensation, Eve gasped sharply, her eyes flying open.

  He held the hot center of her in his palm, setting her athrob. “Hush, sweetheart. This will be pleasurable, I promise.”

  She had no doubt Ryder was speaking the truth. She had never felt anything like the swollen, pulsing ache between her thighs. But it unnerved her enough that her hands clenched into fists at her sides.

  Behind her, she felt Ryder slowly shake his head. “No, don’t become so tense, Eve. I want you to relax and help me.”

  “H-Help you?” she rasped, her voice unsteady.

  “Hold up your nightshift,” he ordered softly.

  Eve felt a flush scald her cheeks at his insistence that she participate in her own seduction. Even so, she obeyed him, clutching at the cambric as if she might shred it.

  “Eve, I won’t hurt you. Just lean back and give yourself over to me.”

  She forced herself to do as he said, trying to ease the tension from her rigid muscles. It was difficult, though. She caught her breath as his gentle fingers probed her naked center, parting her folds, lightly following the contours.

  All her senses had flared to painful life, yet Eve struggled to hold herself still and closed her eyes again. In the silence of the library, she could hear Ryder’s soft breaths mingle with her own harsher ones.

  His fingers continued to move over her delicate flesh in the most intimate investigation, rubbing slowly, exploring. She had to bite back a whimper as liquid heat rushed and throbbed between her legs.

  He was casting a sensual spell over her, Eve realized sometime later. The silence had lengthened, holding her rapt and breathless.

  This moment did not even seem real. Rather it was an erotic fantasy, encompassing her in a dream of vibrant awareness.

  Time flowed around them. Every brush of his fingers against her skin spread heat and hunger until finally she whimpered, “Ryder, I am so hot….”

  “I know, love. Just let it take you.”

  His middle finger teased her silky crevice, already slick with her own moisture, then slid inside her. The invasion was unbearably intimate, yet he had scarcely begun, Eve realized.

  His thumb stroking the exquisitely sensitive bud hidden in the folds of her sex, he slid another finger inside her to join the first. Then both withdrew, slowly plunging in and out in a lingering, impossibly arousing rhythm.

  In response, her hips began to move, seeking something she couldn’t even identify. Her entire body had gone taut with fever, with longing. Somehow Ryder was kindling a firestorm inside her, and she wasn’t certain she could bear it. She felt a savage need she had never imagined, a desperation that claimed every nerve in her body.

  Helplessly Eve arched against his hand, the surge of desire so fierce she thought she might die of it.

  Suddenly all her inner muscles clenched around his fingers. She uttered a strangled scream as an unexpected sob ripped from her, and she gripped his forearm, shaking at the explosive burst of pleasure inside her, jagged and intense and flame-hot. Her knees would have buckled except that Ryder was holding her up, enfolding her as if she were a precious treasure he wanted to protect.

  When her powerful climax was over, Eve sagged in his arms, shaking with awe, trembling with the wonder of it.

  It was a long, long moment before her gasps slowed, before the tremors faded. Longer still before Ryder trusted her to stand on her own. But then he turned her to face him, his hands curling about her arms, warm and strong as he steadied her, his gaze searching.

  She couldn’t look at him, though. Instead Eve buried her face in the curve of his shoulder to hide her keen embarrassment, her emotions so raw and intense, she could barely breathe. She felt like a dreamer who had awakened from a deep sleep.

  Ryder must have understood, for he continued to shower her with tenderness as he held her—his lips moving against her hair again, his fingers gently stroking the tresses with the same gentleness he had used to set her on fire.

  The very thought of what he had done to her made Eve’s face go scarlet. When her ragged breath was finally under control, she uttered a rueful, self-deprecating laugh and mumbled into his shoulder, “You must think me a complete wanton.”

  “No, I think you a lovely innocent. One who is startled to realize she can feel such deep physical pleasure.”

  “I never knew,” she breathed with wonder.

  “Of course you didn’t. How could you unless someone showed you?”

  Her nose burrowed further into his coat. She was grateful to Ryder for his kindness, for awakening her to passion, but she wanted to squirm, she felt so exposed to him, so completely vulnerable. “I suppose…I should thank you.”

  “It was my pleasure, Countess.” She heard the smile in his voice as he rested his chin on the top of her head. “There is much more I could show you, but I think that is enough for one evening.”

  “There is more?”

  His low laugh held a strangled note. “Much, much more.”

  Suddenly Eve became aware of the heat of his body, the coiled tension of his muscles, and realized that the incredible passion he had shown her had all been one-sided. Ryder had made her shiver and tremble with fire, but he was still burning.

  She drew back to look up at him. “But what about you, Ryder? You didn’t…take any pleasure.”

  His eyes were dangerously dark and distinctly possessive as they traveled over her face. “Giving you pleasure was enough for me.”

  At his reply, she shook her head in bewilderment. She could tell from the bulge at his groin that Ryder was physically stimulated; the arousal that had branded her back was definitely sexual. But appar
ently he was content to remain that way out of concern for her sensibilities.

  His restraint shocked her, even more than the carnal experience Ryder had given her, even more than the wondrous feelings he had kindled in her. Her late husband had never shown the least concern for her sensibilities.

  But then Ryder was a vastly different sort of man from her husband. Or perhaps he merely didn’t desire her.

  Eve searched his gaze, which had grown darkly enigmatic.

  He wanted her sexually, she was fairly certain about that. But it was a normal male reaction to a barely clothed female body. Any woman could satisfy his physical needs—and in fact would satisfy him far better than she could.

  The thought left a strange ache in her chest.

  Before she could examine the emotion, however, Ryder drew a shallow breath. “I had best go.”

  Bending, he lightly kissed her forehead as he might a child. Then he pulled free of her and stepped back. “Sweet dreams, Countess.”

  Mutely Eve watched him turn away, disappointment and something else she could only identify as dismay knotting inside her. Perhaps Ryder meant to seek physical release with his mistress as Richard had done.

  Did Ryder have a mistress?

  The ache in her chest actually became painful.

  Impossibly, she wanted to ask him to stay. But she stood unmoving as he strode to the library door and disappeared.

  It shouldn’t matter to her if Ryder was leaving to find carnal gratification in the perfumed arms of his mistress or some other ravishing lady of the evening.

  It meant nothing to her. She had no business dwelling on the intense, sexual feelings he had aroused in her. Ryder had merely done her a kindness, showing her that there was more to lovemaking than pain and loathing.

  Still nonplussed, Eve shook her head. He had asked her how he could woo a lady in order to please her, but instead he had been the one to enlighten her. His tutelage had been enough to make her woman’s heart yearn and her body ache.

  But she had to crush those dark desires for Ryder, Eve told herself staunchly, before they got entirely out of hand.

  Even so, when she lifted her hand to her bare throat, she couldn’t help remembering how fiercely gentle his touch had been or stop herself from longing again for the kind of caresses Ryder had given her. Caresses that for a breathless moment in time had made her feel cherished and desired.