Shattered Dreams

by Shirley Wilkinson

  Nathan was stunned. That was the last thing he had expected. Still, he wasn’t about to decline. He gave his cousin a bright smile that he also turned to the king and queen before bowing. “Well, if that is the case, I believe I have happy news to share. If you will excuse me, please.”

  ―

  Galdren watched him leave with stormy eyes. No one except maybe his father heard his mother’s words. “This is the right thing. You are giving her the space she needs to learn and grow in more ways than one. Take solace in that.”

  He knew she was right, of course. He had already decided that if he were to fulfill his duties toward Avila, then he could not keep her isolated. That did not make it hurt less to watch the jaunt in Nathan’s steps as he walked back to where Avila was waiting.

  31. Happy News

  Nathan was shocked when Lady Dunoire walked by with barely a pause. He thought he heard her mumble out a greeting, but she was off before he could respond. Her swift departure had him worried as he looked around to find Avila.

  When he finally saw her, she was at the far end of the refreshment area and had just downed a drink. She put a hand on her chest and grimaced, then reached for another. His eyes widened, and he rushed forward. He made it just in time to pluck the drink from her hands and gave her a cheery smile when she glowered at him. “I think perhaps you should be looking for a different refreshment. These are not usually the downing variety.”

  Avila sighed and shrugged. “I figured that out after the first one.” She tried to smile back. “I apologize for leaving you alone so long.”

  Nathan’s smile fell and his eyes narrowed as he looked at the tension in her jaw and the tightness in her eyes before he set the cup down and put her hand on his arm. His voice was low as he led her away. “What happened?”

  She nearly grimaced at his question, then shook her head. “Nothing worth talking about.”

  He pulled them both to a stop before they reached the dance floor. “Why don’t you let me be the judge of that?”

  Her eyes were hard when she looked up at him. “I apologize, but no. I handled it already.”

  Nathan suddenly had a horrible feeling that he knew what had gone on between the two women, but this was not the place to keep prying. Instead, he took a deep breath and tried to smile again. “Fine. Then why don’t we have a change in subject?”

  She eyed him warily, and he had to remind himself of where they were to keep from winking at her. “I have some excellent news. Would you like to hear?”

  Her expression did not change at all when she responded, “I have a feeling you’re going to tell me anyway.”

  The deadpan look she was giving was too much. He chuckled as he patted her hand. “Of course, but I promise you’ll be glad I did.”

  When her only response was to try and pull her hand away, he finally relented and stopped teasing her. “I spoke to my cousin just before I came to find you. Much to my surprise, he told me he was willing to give you permission to visit the Peloun Reserve when I go back next week.”

  His words instantly had her expression changing. She grasped his arm tightly and lowered her voice. “It is not funny to joke like that.”

  Nathan’s grin toned down into a soft smile. “No jokes. I promise. He said it would be all right for you to stay until I have to return.”

  She swallowed a few times before she looked over to the dais. Galdren was not looking in their direction, but the queen was. The woman gave Avila a bright smile before she turned again to her husband. Avila then looked back at Nathan. It looked like she might hug him.

  Her voice held more than a little excitement as she asked, “So, we are going with you next week? And we’ll be gone for, what? Three weeks? What kind of clothes will I need? Will we have time to visit the savannah?” All signs of her previous bad mood were gone.

  Nathan’s chuckle turned into a laugh. “Woah, hold on—one at a time. First, Galdren has said he will not be able to go with us, so it will just be the two of us. And your guards, of course. As for the rest, we can go over the details tomorrow.” He paused and made sure he had her attention since she looked like she had walked into a wall. There was a mix of emotions in her eyes that he tried to mitigate as he said, “Avila, I have to warn you that I will be there for business. Part of what I do is work as the liaison between the duke and the palace. However, I will make sure we have time to let you see as much of the reserve as you can handle.”

  Eventually, she managed to shake off her stupor. “I apologize. I’m just shocked.” She then managed to grin at him. “But I am still looking forward to it! This is the chance of a lifetime, even if you will be busy most of the time.”

  Nathan was glad to see a real smile from her instead of the fake one she had been trying to pass off earlier. He returned it as he pulled her toward the dance floor once again. After that, neither of them noticed the passing of time as they got lost in conversation about what was to come. Though, the night did end earlier than anticipated. Just the one drink was enough to make Avila loopy after a short while. Nathan had to fight his laughter the whole way back to the family wing. He was almost loath to see her go, but he knew it had given him plenty of ammunition for their next conversation.

  ―

  The following day, Avila could hardly sit still. She was still trying to deal with her conflicting emotions about what was to come. On the one hand, she was going to go to Peloun. It was more than she expected after her trip to Araleen went so poorly. She was positively giddy with thoughts about what she might see.

  On the other, she was going without Galdren. That was the crux of her confusion. She tried to be elated at the thought that he was willing to trust her to go somewhere without him, but she could not entirely erase the doubt that he might have an ulterior motive. Especially after her conversation with the beautiful Lady Dunoire. The timing was too close for her to not at least consider that there could be a connection. Was he sending her away at the girl’s suggestion?

  Even if she didn’t think about that, which was difficult, she still had to consider why he had been willing to let her go after he had been so adamant that her safety was only guaranteed with him. It wasn’t until she thought about it that she realized she had subconsciously been allowing his words when she first moved to give her hope that there was more going on than there actually was. It was a hard pill to swallow, but she forced herself to admit it.

  When it got to the point that pacing around her room was not enough, she decided to go for a walk. Unfortunately, it started raining not long after she entered the gardens. Instead of heading back to her room, she raced to the hothouse. At least she would be able to walk around in there and not feel as cooped up.

  She was thrilled when she entered to find Queen Lorne already there. The woman gave her a bright smile as she gestured for her to come over. “I understand that you will be leaving for a few weeks?”

  Avila hadn’t doubted Nathan, but hearing it confirmed by the queen shot electricity through her veins. Despite her worries, she practically bounced on the balls of her feet and had to swallow a squeal of excitement. “I haven’t spoken to Galdren about it yet, but Nathan told me last night. I can’t wait to go!”

  Queen Lorne’s eyes dimmed for a moment, but her voice didn’t show it. “I’m glad to know you are so excited about it. I must confess, that is the one reserve I have never been to, so I envy you.”

  Avila stopped in shock. She had expected the queen to have visited all of them. Still, she shook it off. “Well, I can promise to bring back plenty of sketches for you.”

  The queen wasn’t given a chance to respond, as they were interrupted by Galdren. “I thought I might find you here.”

  Avila turned to him with a grin, but it faded slightly when she caught his eyes. His expression was genial, but there was something missing. Some warmth that she usually saw that wasn’t there. However, she wasn�
��t given the opportunity to reply, as he immediately added, “I hate to pull you away from the hothouse, but I need to speak with you. I will be busy this afternoon.”

  The queen patted Avila’s arm with a smile. “Don’t worry, these will still be waiting.”

  Neither the queen nor Galdren showed anything other than a smile, but Avila couldn’t shake off the feeling that there was more going on. Still, she doubted they would tell her if she asked. Instead, she motioned toward the door. “We can speak here if you wish. If not, I hope you brought an umbrella. I hadn’t thought to bring mine.”

  He chuckled at her quip and turned toward the door. “I thought that might have been the case, so I brought an extra. Besides, I believe Lee should have one as well.”

  Avila stopped and tapped her chin. “Huh, I hadn’t thought of that.”

  Galdren nearly rolled his eyes, though he didn’t say anything as he motioned for her to follow.

  When they got back to her rooms, Avila immediately went to stand in front of the fireplace. Galdren took a seat nearby before he spoke. “Nathan already told you that I agreed to allow him to escort you to the Peloun Reserve, correct?”

  Avila turned and tried to keep her grin to a manageable level. “Yes!” She then paused as it occurred to her that his mood might be an indicator that he was actually upset because he couldn’t go as well instead of the conjectures she had previously been considering. She gave him a grin as she added, “You know, it would have been nice if you could come too, but like I told your mother, I can bring back lots of sketches.”

  Galdren didn’t respond right away. She watched as his expression became guarded, which didn’t help her mindset, but he finally said, “While I appreciate the offer, and I am sure my mother will love your sketches, there is no need for you to worry on my behalf. I have been there before. Plus, you should focus on making the most of your trip.”

  Avila gave him a curious look. He hadn’t denied he was upset about not going, even though he had already been. It made her all the more curious and worried as to why he was troubled. “Are you sure?”

  Galdren sighed and looked over with a wry smile. “You never give up, do you?”

  She only raised a brow in response. He chuckled at the sight of it before he shrugged. “I am sure. However, since I will not be able to personally ensure your safety, I will admit to being uncomfortable after what happened previously.”

  Avila’s smile instantly dimmed. She tried not to think about the last reserve visit, and his reminder was like a slap to the face. Still, she knew he hadn’t meant it that way, so she tried to keep her discomfort to herself. “Well, that’s one thing I’m sure you don’t need to worry about. I’m going with my guards, right? Plus, I doubt Nathan would allow anything to happen that might mar his good name.”

  Despite the somber turn in the conversation, Galdren managed a real smile as he said, “I am sure you are correct. From what I understand, my uncle has wanted to meet you as well, so I doubt you will have much time to yourself anyway.”

  She gave him a doubtful look. “If you say so.” Her fingers were finally warm by that time, so she turned to take a seat before she gave him another curious look. “I doubt that was all you wanted to speak to me about, or you would not have pulled me back here. What else is there?”

  He shook his head and smiled. “I felt it would be prudent to discuss the details and possible situations. I have a meeting scheduled later to go over the finer points with Nathan as well.”

  Avila had to fight not to roll her eyes. She had a feeling she was about to be given many more rules to follow. She only managed to stop herself at the memory of the recent reminder of why he was so protective. Even if she still wasn’t sure what motivated him to send her, she didn’t doubt that they were at least friends. When her only response was to look at him expectantly, he continued.

  Over the next hour, he laid out who would be going, when she would be leaving, the routes they would be taking, and lastly, what she was to do in case of emergencies. She would have liked to say it was more than she needed, but it was all she expected. Still, she didn’t complain. Instead, she thanked him for the trouble he was going through to let her go and waved him out before she headed back out to the hothouse. At least it had quit raining.

  ―

  The next morning, Avila hit her first snag. She had forgotten about her studies in her excitement to go to the Peloun Reserve. Now, she had to figure out what to say to Professor Gilbert. She hoped he wouldn’t be too upset. Even with everything that both Nathan and Galdren had already gone through, she would reschedule the trip if necessary. Not that she wanted to.

  She was up and pacing when the professor finally came in. His brow rose when she turned to him with an earnest look. He set his things down and approached her. “From that look, I would say you have a favor to ask.”

  Avila chuckled awkwardly and gave him a half-shrug. “I suppose that is close enough to the truth.”

  When he gave her an expectant look, she took a deep breath and decided to get it over with. “I was invited to spend the next three weeks at the Peloun Reserve and said yes before I thought about what it would mean for my studies. It wasn’t until this morning that it even crossed my mind, so we can rearrange things if we need to. Unless you want to go too? I’m sure that can be arranged.”

  The professor chuckled. “I don’t think that would be as easy to arrange as you are inferring. Besides, would it not be better for you to focus on other things while you are there? I’m sure there will be plenty to keep you busy.”

  Avila froze before she jumped forward and grabbed his arm with a grin. “Does this mean you are all right with me going?”

  He patted her hand before he extricated himself and went to pull out his papers. “While I am not fond of the delay, this is the type of opportunity that I told you would come your way. So few people are invited that it would be ridiculous for me to stand in the way of this trip.”

  Once he had everything out, he turned to her with a somber face. “That being said, do expect me to send work with you. It would be counterproductive if you were to lose focus entirely.”

  Avila was still grinning as she took her seat. “Of course. No matter what, I will dedicate at least a few hours a day to make sure any work you send gets done.”

  Avila watched as he put his hand over his face to conceal his obvious laughter. She tried not to grin when he finally looked up and started pulling out the things for her lessons. That was the last it was mentioned, and they quickly got to work. They did have a lot to fit in before she left, after all.

  ―

  The rest of the week was a flurry of activity for Avila. The queen seemed nearly as excited as she was and helped Avila make sure she would have appropriate clothing: more summer dresses, and even shorts. The last was an unexpected addition, but Queen Lorne assured her that it would be acceptable where she was going. It was hot there by Arinel standards, all year round. To wear more in the summer would be intolerable. Since she would be in the field often, the shorts would be indispensable.

  Avila was mortified when she finally saw all her luggage together. She had never traveled far before the trip to Nerada, and that had only been one night, but she still had the feeling the two suitcases and small trunk were more than what she really needed. It wasn’t as though she couldn’t wear the same thing more than once. Although, she had to admit she didn’t see the queen often wear the same suit. She had the fleeting thought the night before she left that perhaps next time, she would ask to pack a little lighter.

  32. Arrival

  That Saturday morning found Avila back at the transport facility with many more people than the last time. Galdren had come to see her off. Both Randy and Baxter were with him, like always. Plus, she had three of her guards—Angelo, Jacob, and April. Nathan was also there with a small contingent of his own.

  It was t
he first time Avila had seen him with a guard, so she gave him a questioning look when they all walked in. He was confused until she glanced over his shoulder. He then laughed as he motioned for them to put everything on the platform where Avila’s luggage was already stacked.

  Nathan’s voice still held laughter when he approached. “I see you weren’t expecting me to have guards as well. Do I not seem royal enough to warrant them?”

  Avila frowned at his prodding. He laughed and patted her shoulder. “Don’t worry. They only come when I am outside the palace complex. Unlike you, I don’t need to be watched around the clock.”

  Her frown grew, though she made sure to show the humor behind it. It came out in her voice as well when she finally responded, “Well, I suppose that just means you aren’t as important after all.”

  Nathan laughed again but wasn’t able to respond before Galdren joined them. Despite his blank face, or possibly because of it, Avila felt that something was bothering him. If it was, he didn’t get to say anything before Nathan held up a hand. “Yes, I already know. Keep her safe, and never let danger come near her. I have already given my word that will be the case.”

  Galdren frowned but nodded. “I do appreciate your promise.”

  He then turned to Avila. He smiled, but it seemed forced. She wasn’t going to call him on it. Some things were better left unsaid. At least his voice didn’t show any irritation. “Please ensure that you never go anywhere alone.”

  She raised a brow at the statement and tried not to laugh at his constant reminders. “I know. I promise. Besides, we both know I will never be anywhere without at least one of my guards, and I trust them all.”