by HP Mallory
“They aren’t the same as before.”
“Nae?”
I nodded. “I feel different after fighting the Stymphalians.”
I shuddered as I squeezed my eyes shut. Though the cuts on my body were healed, I could still see those terrifying birds swooping down from the sky to sink their claws into my skin. And then there was the horror of being chased through a burning castle by a long-dead Roman soldier. I lifted my hand and pinched the bridge of my nose.
“Tell me,” Tallis kissed my forehead, and sat back down beside me, his weight causing the mattress to dip low. “I cannae help if ye dinnae tell me how, Besom. Or mayhap ye should talk to the kind doctor…”
“I don’t need a shrink right now,” I snapped, even though I did like Karl Jung and his visits had helped me. But, no, this wasn’t something Jung could help me with. The harsh tone of my own voice caused me to wince. “I’m sorry, Tallis.” I leaned to the side and rested my head on his chest as he brought his arm around me protectively.
“Talk to me, lass.”
“Symbols keep flashing through my mind and I can’t seem to shut my brain up for more than a few seconds. I don’t know what any of it means, but I can’t get away from the feeling that these… symbols mean something. Like they’re important. I feel like I’m supposed to do something…”
“What type of symbols, lass?”
I closed my eyes as I remembered the dream I’d had only two nights before. “I keep seeing a locket, some kind of gem, an old coin, some kind of chalice or goblet, and a… a ring.”
Tallis took a breath and faced me. “None o’ those things make any sense to me, Besom.”
I nodded. “They don’t make any sense to me either.” My hands ached, and I noticed my knuckles turned white as I clenched my hands into tight fists as I thought of the other subject which was causing me even more unrest. “Alaire threatened my mother. Whatever these dreams and visions are trying to tell me, I think they’re all connected.”
“Why do ye think that?”
“Because Alaire is afraid I’ll figure out what he’s up to, and that’s why he keeps calling me. It’s more than his usual taunting and mind games. He’s scared.” I paused. “But what could possibly scare Alaire?”
Tallis pulled away, only to stand up and pace back and forth across the floor. “Ye didnae tell me he contacted ye.” He grew quiet and then turned an irritated expression at me. “How am I ‘sposed to protect ye if there are secrets between oos?”
I relaxed a bit and slumped forward. “I didn’t keep it from you intentionally. It must have slipped my mind.” Then I sighed. “There’s been so much going on… You know I would never keep something important from you…”
“Ye are nae the only one with yer head in a vise.” He scrubbed a hand over his face and pulled me against his chest. I couldn’t help but wrap my arms around him. The constant rise and fall of his chest beneath my cheek helped settle the broiling fire in my gut. “I hate Alaire as mooch as ye an’ the stookie angel do, boot we have to remain united, besom. Tell me what’s goin’ on in that head o’ yours, an’ we can get through it together.”
I chewed my lip as I struggled to find a way to explain without sounding completely bonkers. Fat chance of that happening, so I just took a leap of faith. “At first, it was the same nightmares over and over, but now, it’s... now I’m dreaming about objects. Powerful objects and there must be a reason, Tallis.”
“Go on.”
I sighed. “It’s just… I can never quite see them clearly enough. It’s like I know what they are, but I can’t see them clearly enough to know what color they are or what material they’re made of. They’re important, but out of focus, like I’m looking at them through fog. But, I can feel their importance.”
Tallis shuffled back and tilted my head, forcing me to finally meet his gaze.
“Perhaps ‘tis only yer mind playin’ tricks on ye, lass. Ye have been through so mooch lately, yer body might be rebellin’.”
“Like some form of PTSD?”
He nodded. “Aye, exactly.”
I shook my head. “It’s more than that, Tallis. Something happened when The Self took over me. And I don’t understand it and I can’t explain it. I just… I just feel this… burning need to contact my mom.” I sighed. “I need to talk to my mom.”
The door to the bedroom crashed against the wall as the portly angel toppled through the opening. “Yo! I know I did NOT just hear you say that!”
“Oh my God, Bill, were you eavesdropping this whole time?”
“We talked about this, Nips! An’ I’m sure one of those freaks from AE already explainationed to you that you can’t just ring yer mom up on the phone like you ain’t been dead for howevers long you been dead!” Bill swiped a sticky glob of unidentified goop off the corner of his mouth before sucking his thumb clean. “The life you had when death came a knockin’ is long gone, Lils.”
“I understand that, Bill, but the situation has changed,” I argued, crossing my arms against my chest. “With Alaire in the picture, my mom’s not safe.” I grew quiet for a minute, trying to hold my tears at bay. “There has to be a way to warn her that Alaire might try to find her.” I pulled away from Tallis. It was my turn to start pacing.
“The only person who can contact the livin’ without fear of getting’ his ass chewed out by management is Uriel, yo. Bein’ the Angel of Death got its perks, ya know?”
“What are you talking about?” I demanded, shaking my head. “Why can’t I just pick up the phone and call her?”
Bill shook his head. “It won’t work. The call won’t ever go through.”
“Why?”
“’Cause that’s the way of things.”
“Then I could get on a plane,” I started.
Bill shook his head harder. “An’ when you tried to get to your mom’s house, you’d lose your way for no apparent reason or if you reached her house, she’d no longer live there.”
“I don’t understand.”
“You ain’t meant to. The rules for contactin’ relatives after yer dead are strict and AE does everythin’ in their power to make sure you ain’t able to.”
“But this Uriel,” I started, chewing on my lip. “He could do it?”
“If he weren’t playin’ prisoner to Alaire, deep in that dungeon you saw him in,” Bill answered. I remembered the image of Uriel in what amounted to a dungeon. That did put a damper on things…
“Aye, we cannae get to Uriel without alertin’ Alaire or courtin’ certain death,” Tallis said, shaking his head. “If Alaire doesnae want anyone to find Uriel, then he will have guards an’ magic to keep Uriel hidden.”
“Fuck,” I whispered.
Tallis nodded. “I saw the pictures of Uriel’s imprisonment jist as ye have, lass. To venture into that darkness is nae wise.”
“What Conan said,” Bill responded with a clipped nod.
My headache worsened as I listened to my companions tell me this was hopeless. “Before I died, magic didn’t exist. Demons, angels, and Druids were just meticulously crafted myths. I grew up with people telling me everything happens for a reason. I died for a reason.”
“Lass…”
“No, Tallis,” I said abruptly. “How can I be expected to sit here and carry on like I don’t have this unbearable weight on my shoulders? I feel like, at any moment, destiny is just going to come crashing down on me, and I’ll be completely helpless! The things I saw... the things I did when I wasn’t in control of myself... I NEVER want to feel that way again. And knowing Alaire could be going after my mom any second… it’s too much! I can’t just let that happen!”
“There’s naethin’ ye can do, lass!”
There was a note of desperation in Tallis’s voice, but I couldn’t let my love for the two-thousand year old Druid come before my need to protect my mother.
“When Alaire called, he made it seem like he had a way of getting to my mother...” I started as I remembered the details.
/> “He coulda just been pullin’ yer chain, tryin’ to freak you the fuck out,” Bill started.
I shook my head. “I don’t believe that.” I started pacing again. “At first, I thought Alaire meant he was going to have her killed or something and bring her here, but the more I think about it, I don’t… I don’t think that’s what he meant. He just… he made it sound like he had people watching her… closely.”
Bill quirked a scraggly brow at me. “He’s just tryna wind you up, and you’re letting him.”
It was Tallis who silenced Bill this time—by raising his hand and then facing me. “Explain what Alaire said agin, lass.”
I nodded. “Alaire said I have the attention of AE’s top people. He mentioned Asterion and the Grove of Lamentations and he knew exactly how long it had taken us to get back. I didn’t take the bait when he tried to scare me, and that was when he insinuated he was going to sleep with my mother in retaliation for me rejecting him…” I paced to one end of the room and then turned around, heading back to Tallis and Bill. I stopped short in front of Tallis. “If Alaire wanted to simply get under my skin, why mention everything else? Why not just be a jerk like always and… leave it at that?”
Tallis scratched his chin, worry etched into his expression. “Alaire is watchin’ ye closely, Besom. Too close for me likin’. I believe ye about him bein’ afraid, but there’s no guessin’ what his plans are.” He sighed. “Where Alaire’s concerned, it’s too dangerous for ye to go lookin’ for answers.”
“Alaire lost track of me, and that freaked him out. If he thinks I’m close to finding something, that means he’s hiding something, Tallis. We just need to figure out what that something is.” My eyes pleaded with Tallis, but I saw uncertainty in his gaze. There was no proof of any of this. I was reaching.
And I knew I was reaching, yet I couldn’t stop.
I just… Alaire was up to something. He was.
Now it was simply a matter of figuring out what.
TWO
LILY
The scent of dew-covered blades of grass floated on the wind, the earthy aroma of leather and sweat along with it. I blinked against the harsh rays of light that warmed my face. My hand dug into the ground beneath me until I pried a stone free. Leaves rustled to the right, and I sprang to my feet, holding the stone at my side like a weapon. A figure moved in the shadows.
I knew better than to rest unguarded.
My eyes snapped from left to right, trying to keep track of the shrouded figure that lingered just out of sight. I felt its gaze burning a trail along the contours of my body. I swallowed past the lump in my throat and called, “Show yourself.”
“Lily!” Tallis shouted as he ducked the slashing arc of my sword. “Pay attention!”
I couldn’t explain what had just happened. It was almost as if I were dreaming—but I was awake. Tallis and I were in the middle of practicing and yet… the vision had hit me, all the same.
Pay attention, Lily! I reprimanded myself.
I shuffled quickly, and lunged for Tallis. If he hadn’t moved out of the way in time, the blow would have been a good one. He shoved his shoulder into my sternum, knocking the air out of my lungs as I hit the ground with a loud groan. My head swam dangerously.
The man stumbled from the darkness, a hand pressed against a scarlet stain that ran down the length of his side. I lifted the stone to keep him at bay. From the looks of him—he was barely able to stand, but that didn’t stop the man from unsheathing a sword. A wicked smile curled his lips, and he cautioned a step toward me. The man dropped the sword to the ground.
“I mean you no harm.”
Roman.
Like fucking hell he meant me no harm. “That’s far enough,” I said.
“I need your help, Sorcha.”
And then I knew. I remembered who this was… Aulus Plauntius.
Feeling at a disadvantage, I launched myself at the ground where the sword had landed. Hands encircled my wrists and lifted me off my feet. Cruel eyes glared at me. In their depths I saw a strange madness... it spoke of obsession and anger—of vengeance and a love so tainted, it brought a tear to my eye.
###
Tallis grabbed me by my shoulders and lifted me up. I fought him, unable to tell what true reality was and what was dream, brought on by the sword. I felt my back hit the wall.
“Besom, open yer eyes,” Tallis whispered in my ear. My fingers curled around his bicep, and I wrapped my legs around his hips.
“Tallis?”
I barely recognized my own voice.
“That’s it, lass. Come back to me.”
My eyes flew open. I ran my hands down Tallis’s face just to make sure it was really him in front of me, that this was truly real. I panted through the last of my vision. A tiny bead of blood trickled from a thin cut that slashed down his cheek. I wiped it away and held him tighter. “I’m sorry.”
Tallis tilted my chin up and brushed his lips against mine. He set me back on my feet and tossed me my sword. His jaw clenched as I sheathed the weapon without much care. But I was beyond the point of caring. Whatever had happened, whatever my sword had just forced me to see, to experience, it was too much.
I was winded and exhausted. And I was scared.
“I’ve had enough for the day,” I said as Tallis nodded.
“I’ll be oop shortly,” Tallis said as he continued practicing with his own sword. Ever since he’d been returned to his human state, he practiced swordsplay religiously. It made sense because he was no longer immortal. Without the soul of the legendary warrior, Donnchadh, inside him, Tallis was for the first time… mortal. He was no longer invincible. And that scared him as much as it scared me.
I left our small back yard and returned to the apartment. As soon as I walked in, my phone buzzed on the table and I hit the accept call button without paying attention.
“I called three times, Lily. It’s rude to ignore your friends.”
His voice made me shudder and all the hairs on the back of my neck stood at attention. “You don’t have friends, Alaire, especially not me.” I felt like I was on a rollercoaster, inching my way up a steep incline as I awaited the inevitable plunge back down the tracks. Only this was a roller coaster that wouldn’t stay on the tracks. This was a coaster that sent you flying to your inevitable death.
The bark of laughter that blared in my ear caused Bill to hop off the couch and hover over my shoulder.
“Fuckin’ fucker,” he breathed.
I swallowed hard. “What do you want, Alaire? I’m sure the head honcho of the Underground City has better things to do than bother a lowly Soul Retriever like me.”
“Oh, Ms. Harper,” he laughed that acidic sound that held no humor. “You are hardly lowly.”
“What do you want?”
He was quiet for a moment. “I need you on my team, Ms. Harper.”
“That will never happen.”
“Big things are happening down here…”
“What sort of big things?”
“I’m not at liberty to explain just yet, my dear, but I will give you a word of advice: when it comes to taking sides, choose wisely.”
“As I said earlier, I will never choose to side with you,” I spat the words out.
He chuckled again. “Come now, my dear. We had fun together. Even you can admit that.”
I glanced over at Bill. The corners of his mouth slanted downward into a frown as he listened.
“I can’t admit that because it isn’t true,” I argued but then honed in on the important part of what he’d just said. “When you say big things are happening in the Underground City, you make it sound like you’re on the brink of war,” I replied, trying to nudge him for any type of information. I hoped I sounded casual. “I wasn’t aware you had so many enemies.”
“There are bigger problems in this world than you or I, Lily. Don’t play stupid.”
“You’re in power for a reason, Alaire. Either you’re a pawn in a bigger player’s game, or
you’re trying to set the chess board to your advantage to keep someone else from rising to the occasion and challenging you.” It was a bluff, one I was sure Alaire wouldn’t fall for, but it was still worth the chance. “But it doesn’t matter anyway, right? You want something from me, and instead of just coming out and asking for whatever it is you’re after, you’re hoping I’ll just offer myself up on a silver platter.”
“Then you won’t side with me, is that what you’re saying?”
I sighed. “That’s what I’ve been saying all along.”
He laughed again. “Such a shame. You wouldn’t want anything to happen to your mother, would you?” There it was again: Alaire showing his hand. He was afraid. Whenever my words edged too close to the truth, my mother became his only source of ammunition. But I knew Alaire well enough to know he would act on that ammunition. It wasn’t just a blind threat. Unfortunately.
“Fuck you, Alaire!” I railed at him, no longer able to keep my temper in check. “If anything happens to my mother, I’ll…” and the line died.
Bill snatched the phone from my hand. He glared at me with everything he had. “Are you crazy?! You know that assjacket knows every move we make! You shouldn’t have baited him like that! Why don’t you just drag us to the fucking execution block and get it over with?”
“You can’t die, Bill, remember?” I grumbled, angry with myself that I’d lost my temper.
Bill’s face crumpled, and for a moment I thought I saw pity in his eyes. “But you can.”
He walked out of the room, and I was left alone with my thoughts, the last place I wanted to be.
###
TALLIS
I could not tell if Alaire was mad or simply too arrogant to see that toying with me Besom was a foolish thing to do.
Three calls every day. It became the new norm.
No call lasted more than a few minutes, but each time Besom ended the call, tears glistened in her eyes.
Me bones ached as I battered me fists into the wall.
