by HP Mallory
Only pain seemed to break through the anger that festered inside me.
Aye, I loved me lass, but she was not the only one plagued by nightmares and memories best left in the past. Just last night, I dreamt I was trapped in Alaire’s dungeon again as Sorcha, a woman I had once loved, screamed me name through the walls. Like now, I pounded me fists into the stone, but I could not reach her in time. When I held her in me arms at last, Sorcha was no longer herself. It was Lily I saw bleeding out on the cold ground before me.
And when I awakened to a slight figure pressed against me chest, I looked down and saw Sorcha in Lily’s face. Guilt and something far nastier kept me from holding her closer. I was supposed to be strong for Lily, but I could not help but feel just as lost as she was. Yet I was not dreaming about symbols and objects with power, but me head was not in the right place, either. Even the stookie angel seemed at a loss as of late.
“Yo, Conan! Think you might wanna stop punchin’ the fuckin’ wall for two seconds?”
Aye, he had a point. I had done a job upon the bloody thing.
I dropped me hands and faced the wee angel. “Did ye come here jist to be a nuisance, or do ye have somethin’ to say that’s worth hearin’?”
“Look, Lils ain’t actin’ like herself right now, dude. I’m tryna talk her outta contactin’ her mom, but she’s stubborn, and I don’t know how much longer I can keep her from goin’ down that road. Might want to go handle yer business before we gotta bigger problem on our hands.”
After so long of traveling with Bill, there were still times when I did not understand a thing he said. “Ye want me to talk to Lily?”
“That’s what I said, ain’t it?”
“Lily is a strong lass. She doesnae need me lookin’ over her shoulder all the time. I need to give her space fer now.”
“If you think that’s what’s best right now, then you don’t know jack shit about chicks, yo. When Nips says she don’t need help, she does. When she says she don’t wanna be bothered, she’s lyin’ like a log with fleas. Trust me.”
I did not understand what a log had to do with fleas but I knew better than to ask.
Something in the angel’s words struck me true. I whispered a wee Druid spell to heal me knuckles and went to find Lily. I would take care of the destroyed wall later.
Besom sat at the table with her beautiful eyes locked on the buzzing device before her. Her voice was sharp as an obsidian blade as she answered the call. “Alaire, I swear to whatever god that I will rip out your intestines and use them to knit a scarf if you go anywhere near my mother!”
Lily fell silent for a moment, and I moved to her side.
Her hand trembled beside her ear as she held the mobile with a white-knuckled grip. “What meeting? So, you’re telling me that some hotshot in Afterlife Enterprises is going to lessen my sentence if I show up for a board meeting?” She paused. “That makes no sense.”
I placed me hand on Besom’s hip, and she flinched. My lips brushed the pulse point in her neck, and I felt her relax slowly.
Lily snorted bitterly. “And you expect me to believe this isn’t another trap? Nice try, Alaire. If lessening my sentence involves jumping into your bed, it’ll be a hard pass, as always.”
At that, anger began to burn within me. Alaire was relentless. Bloody relentless.
“Now that I know Afterlife Enterprises is run by some twisted democracy, I’ll take my chances with them directly and cut out the middleman… aka you.”
The line went dead and Lily exhaled her pent-up worry.
She spun in me arms and I kissed the plump curve of her bottom lip and tasted her sadness and determination as me chest swelled with pride. She was beyond lovely and she was mine. It was a realization that hit me each and every day.
“Yoze, I gotta go get me somethin’ to eat,” the stookie angel called as he waddled out the door, whistling as he left.
“Besom,” I said as I turned to face Lily once more. “What did…”
“Not now,” she interrupted. “I… need you, Tallis.”
I immediately understood her need. It was deep in her eyes. The only way I could assist her was to take her mind off everything that was currently clouding her.
I lifted her into me arms and carried her to the bedroom. We undressed each other quickly and silently. Then I lifted her again and placed her down upon the mattress and watched as she fell back with a bounce, thighs opening to welcome me home as I lowered myself on top of her. Nails scraped lightly down my back, causing chill-bumps to prickle me arms and legs.
Lily arched beneath me and slipped her hands between us. Slender fingers circled me cock, and I growled into the crook of her neck.
This was Lily. This was Besom. This was the woman I loved with all me heart.
The scent of her skin and the softness of her body as I sheathed meself deep inside her molten core was unmistakable. And yet, I could not shake the feeling that Sorcha was there too.
Not nae, man, I reprimanded myself. But I could not shake away the image of Sorcha beneath me.
I buried me face in Lily’s neck and focused on bringing her body pleasure.
Breathless gasps caressed her sweat dampened skin.
Her hands scrambled in the sheets as I gave in to me carnal urges and sank me teeth into the flesh of her shoulder. Besom clenched and milked me seed until we were both spent and panting upon the bed. I rolled off her and onto me back, staring up at the ceiling, praying Lily had not noticed the way the rhythm of our lovemaking had faltered.
“I love ye, Besom.”
“I love you too, Tallis.”
But it was not love that caused the ache in me heart.
I could not shake the thought that Lily and I were being tested.
“Nae matter what happens, I want to promise ye that I will nae stop lovin’ ye, lass,” I said as I turned to face her. “Me heart belongs to ye an’ nae one else.” I kissed the top of her head and lost myself to the pull of sleep. But even in the haze of me exhausted mind, I noticed the very second Besom slid out of the bed and crept from the room.
THREE
LILY
Bill sat on a broken lawn chair with his shirt open and an enormous turkey leg in one hand. I tried my best to ignore him as Tallis and I argued for what felt like the thousandth time since waking that morning. My lover struggled to control his tone of voice and I struggled not to roll my eyes. I was determined to contact my mother, and he was determined to stop me.
“Ye only jist returned to yer duties, Besom! Why throw it away now when ye are so close to bein’ rid of it all?”
“Because I have to protect my mother! Why do you have such a hard time understanding that?”
“I’m nae convinced Alaire means what he says. ‘Tis a trap.”
“I agree with Conan,” Bill said, in between mouthfuls. I ignored him.
“A trap?”
He nodded. “Aye. If ye go after yer mother, Alaire has ye right where he wants ye! He doesnae want yer mother, lass, he wants you!”
“I realize that,” I grumbled.
“You won’t be able to contact your mom, anyway,” Bill pointed out.
Tallis and I ignored him.
“If ye go after yer mum, ye’ll be playin’ right into Alaire’s hands.” He took a breath. “Besides, we have a mission to be concerned aboot. We cannae risk the lives o’ those we fight for.”
Yes, AE had informed us we needed to travel to the fourth level of the Underground City again in order to free a soul that was mistakenly sent there. And I had no interest in going.
“Do you even know what we’re fighting for, Tallis? Because it gets less and less clear to me every day.”
“What do ye mean?”
I shrugged. “Alaire said people are choosing sides. Something big is going down, and we’re blindly following orders from AE for soul retrieving missions like nothing is amiss.”
“Ach, we are nae blindly doin’ anything, lass. It is ye who is fallin’ fer Alaire
’s tricks.”
“I agree with Tido,” Bill blurted out. I ignored him again, not pulling my attention from Tallis.
“Why can’t you just trust me for once?!” I threw my hands up and sighed heavily.
Tallis framed my face with his hands and lowered his voice as he looked into my eyes. His were soft. “If ye turn yer back on yer duties, AE will hoont ye down, Lily. Rogue Soul Retrievers dinnae last long.”
“What do you mean?” I asked, my eyes narrowing.
“AE will make an example of ye.”
“And that means?”
“It means if ye breach yer agreement, they willnae jist let ye go. They’ll find ye an’ they’ll send ye to Shade. Is that what ye want?”
Shade was exactly what I’d been trying to avoid by becoming a Soul Retriever in the first place. If I failed to do my missions, I’d have one hundred years of nothingness in Shade to look forward to. Not exactly thrilling…
“What I want is to figure out what Alaire is up to and what my mother has to do with it all.” I grew quiet for a few seconds. “She’s all I have left, Tallis. As someone who’s lost everything, I thought you would understand that, but I guess I was wrong.” I removed his hands from my face and took a step back. “Everything inside me is telling me to do this.”
“If ye refuse yer mission, AE will come after ye, Lily.”
“I agree with the yeti,” Bill said, chewing the last bite of his turkey. “An’ you ain’t gonna be able to reach your mom without Uriel anyway.”
“Then we go after Uriel,” I replied, my lips tight.
“Impossible,” Tallis said and shook his head. “An’ it will give Alaire reason to come after ye, as well. I dinnae want to see ye hurt.” He ran his fingers through his hair and stared down at me.
I lifted up on my tiptoes and kissed his cheek. “I wouldn’t risk angering AE or risking Alaire’s retaliation if I thought I had any other choice, Tallis.” I understood what Tallis was saying—I understood the risks facing me, but I couldn’t just sit back and wait for whatever Alaire had planned to come to fruition. “There is no other way.”
“Then I will help ye.” He slumped forward in defeat.
“Help me?” I repeated, eyeing him with interest. “Help me in finding Uriel?”
“Yeah, how you gonna help her dude?” Bill asked.
He shrugged. “Jenny.”
“Jenny?” I repeated, frowning. The only “Jenny” we both had in common happened to be the leader of one of the levels of the Underground City—the Toy Store. She’d also been a former lover of Tallis’s and though I didn’t have a fight with her now, I wasn’t exactly thrilled to have to rely on her either.
“Aye. Uriel isnae the only one able to reach the living world.”
“Jenny can too?” I asked, frowning.
“Aye. If we ask, she may help.” Though the demoness had helped us before, I felt a stab of jealousy as I remembered the way she was pretty much all over Tallis the last time we’d seen her.
“Why didn’t you mention Jenny before? That she could contact the living, I mean.”
“I willnae try to hide the fact that I dinnae like the thought o’ ye doin’ this, lass, as I believe ‘tis far too dangerous.”
“I don’t like it neither!” Bill said as he launched the bare turkey leg over his left shoulder and then burped loudly. Then he pulled a pair of sunglasses from his pocket before sliding them up the bridge of his nose.
“So, you think I’m making a mistake too?” I asked the slovenly angel.
“All’s I’m saying is you might be disappointed if you do make contact with the other side.”
“What do you mean?”
“Well, what exactly you gonna tell your mom when you talk to her? That you’re her dead daughter in another body with another voice and that you’re warnin’ her some lunatic named Alaire might be tryin’ to bang her? Yeah, that’s gonna go over well.”
My cell vibrated loudly in my pocket, and I turned away from the others to answer. Alaire’s calls were becoming more frequent as the days went by. “What do you want now?” I asked with the same dose of venom as usual. “No. Let me rephrase that. What do you want in general?”
“Hello, Ms. Harper,” Alaire said and paused. “Why do you suppose I want anything?”
“Because you always want something so just come out with it already.”
There was a pregnant pause on the other end before a heavy sigh caused my ears to ring.
“Do you recall our last conversation when I told you I wanted you to help me locate something?”
“Yes.”
“Well, I decided to broach that subject with you.”
“Great,” I muttered.
“I’m sure you’ve heard tales of the real Big Bad long before you ever came down here, Ms. Harper.”
“The real Big Bad?” I repeated, frowning. “You mean, the devil?”
“If that’s what you want to call him,” Alaire chuckled darkly. “Most of us who know him call him The Forsaken. Regardless, there’s only one weapon that can kill him, and I intend to find it.”
“Why do you want to kill him?” I asked, not bothering to ask how one would even go about killing the devil in the first place.
“Afterlife Enterprises was created to keep all aspects of the afterlife organized and functioning, but they’re a little squeamish when it comes to getting their hands dirty. That’s where I come in.”
“Getting their hands dirty?” I repeated, confused. “What are you talking about?”
“I’m talking about the fact that it’s only a matter of time before The Forsaken’s council awakens him and tells him what’s been going on in the Underground City. And how inept AE has been in terms of attempting to keep the order down here.”
“What do I have to do with any of this?” I demanded.
He paused. “Better to align yourself with the devil you know, correct?”
“That doesn’t answer my question.”
“I require your assistance.”
“With what?”
“Finding the only weapon that can do away with The Forsaken,” he answered.
“And why would I help you with that? Not to mention the fact that I have absolutely no idea where to even start looking.”
“You will help me with this, Ms. Harper,” he started in that patriarchal and infuriating tone of his. “Because the risks are too great for you if you don’t.”
More threats. “Playing devil’s advocate,” I started before realizing what I’d just said.
“Ha ha, very funny.”
“It wasn’t a joke. Anyway, do you have any leads on this weapon of yours?”
“If I had a lead, then I wouldn’t need you, now would I?”
Realization dawned on me, and I pulled the phone from my face so I could laugh even though there was nothing funny about it. “Let me guess, you and AE are quaking in your boots because Big Daddy might wake up any minute, and you’ve been fucking off for the last however long?”
“Not quite,” he started but I interrupted him.
“And you thought to try and recruit me to your side before Big Daddy’s council got word of what you’ve been up to.”
“Will you please stop referring to him as ‘Big Daddy’?”
“No.”
“Make all the jokes you want, Ms. Harper, but if power falls to The Forsaken, what happens to all those innocent souls you care so much about? They don’t ever escape the Underground City, I can promise you that. And what do you suppose would happen to AE when he realizes just how much they’ve fucked everything up?”
“I don’t care. That’s AE’s deal and it’s yours. You both got yourselves into this mess so you can get yourselves out.”
“Except for the fact that you’re employed by AE, so what does that mean for you?”
“I don’t know.”
“It means you’re involved in this mess, even if you’d prefer not to be.”
Asshole.
My finger itched to end the call, but I needed to know more. “Let’s say I believe you about this Forsaken guy. What’s his deal? Or am I supposed to believe he’s some sort of fallen angel like in all the stories?”
“Even the most ridiculous stories ring true in one way or another. But yes, he was a fallen angel. The most beautiful too, so the tales got something right.” Alaire grew quiet again and I figured he wanted me to speak.
“If you want my help, I’m going to need the truth, Alaire.”
“Fine,” the leader of the Underground City sneered. “The Forsaken fell from grace for reasons that aren’t as black and white as people wish to think. Some say he defied his creator and served as an example to those who sought to do the same. Others say he was damned for the very thing he was created to do.”
“Which was what?”
“The legend says that he was the first angel to feel emotions and even inspired the creation of mankind. Emotions gave him clarity and freewill. They allowed him to see the flaws of his creator, the flaws of the angels, and the flaws of humanity. Seeing those flaws caused him to rebel against the Kingdom. But it wasn’t the fall or the rebellion that made him into the beast he is now. As I said, the reasons aren’t black and white. I doubt anyone knows the full truth.”
“And this weapon you’re after?”
“We will discuss it another time. I’ve grown weary of our conversation.”
He wasn’t the only one.
###
Bill’s snores sounded like a cage match between hordes of wild animals. It was strangely soothing in a way that didn’t make sense. But then again, it could have just been the guilt eating away at me that was making my thoughts overly sentimental. Though my reasons were just, and my heart was in the right place, that didn’t change the fact that I had to do what I had to do.
And that meant leaving Bill and Tallis.
There was no way I could drag them back to the Underground City and back to Alaire with me. The three of us had been lucky to narrowly escape Alaire’s clutches the last time we found ourselves in the Underground and I wasn’t about to risk it again. Granted, Bill couldn’t die but Tallis absolutely could.
