Her Christmas Romance Surprise

by Kenna Shaw Reed

  “Go. Please go.” It was easier to face the inside of the fridge than Kade. His smile would always be my weakness and right now, I needed one of us to leave the cottage, and I didn’t trust myself not to drive off and sleep in my car rather than come back and face Kade.

  “And you wonder why I didn’t tell you earlier.”

  I heard but didn’t watch as Kade stormed out, the furious clip of boots sounding his retreat from the wooden verandah.

  At least making lunch would give me something practical to do while my head and heart grappled with Declan and the email.

  The pantry offered up fresh Turkish rolls awaiting the selection of deli meats and salads in his refrigerator. Kade had out done himself, right down to the brand-new poaching pan for my eggs.

  Damn him. Lucky him. If Kade had been standing beside me, I’d bounce the pan across his chest just to make him hurt as much as he hurt me.

  No, I wouldn’t.

  But I’d want to.

  Damn him.

  Since my friends and I made the pact, I’d prepared myself for a simple business transaction. One lunch for another. Entertain each other’s families with tales of a fake relationship and then walk away.

  No one would get hurt.

  Until the mysterious K charmed me online.

  If only I could go back and re-read each of his messages, looking for the lie. The hint that he was only looking to make the deal of the century—using me as the bait.

  Hundreds of Tinder dates, well perhaps a slight exaggeration, but I’d been on enough dates to spot a fake in person. Trusting my judgement to end most dates after an hour, few moving onto a second and the rare man making it to my bed.

  Working in advertising, my job relied me on being able to recognize the con-artist with exaggerated claims. Or the grown man with mummy issues, looking for another woman to tell him what to do. The married man who couldn’t lie straight in bed. Seriously, I prided myself having spotted them all and sent them packing before anyone got hurt.

  Before I got emotionally invested and hurt.

  Kade.

  He’d always been the benchmark against which all other men failed. Last week, he’d gotten underneath my defenses. Made me laugh, and now, made me cry.

  The smoke alarm signaled the burning pide, easily blamed on my tears. Not from caring—we’d only been together for a week. No, my hay-fever had to be playing up with all the bloody flowers Kade had sent to my office and now filled this cottage.

  I didn’t care.

  Regardless of how much I wanted not to care, my inner voice kept it real.

  I care. More than I should and not as much as I could have.

  Kade and his brother were in a race to get married. Kade didn’t want me, I was only a pawn to be used. His lips, eyes, arms and words had been a vicious lie.

  My heart was lying in pieces, trust shattered, and the only fair outcome was for the world to be as desolate as I felt.

  Kade had made the mistake of leaving his laptop open. Not that I intended to snoop; nothing else could possibly be worse than the letter. Instead, I activated the mouse to stop the screen going into sleep mode and hiding the devastating words. Re-reading snippets, wanting something to scream joke.

  The third and fourth reading weren’t any easier. Each an additional slice to my heart; reinforcing in black and white that nothing about Kade and me had been real.

  Yet again, I didn’t hear the truck pull back into the yard until Declan appeared at the door. If I looked as shattered as he did, we were both in trouble.

  “You okay?” He hesitated before walking in, waiting for Kade to appear with fists flying, then joined me at the wooden dining table. No chairs had ever never felt so cold and unwelcoming.

  “I didn’t know.” Not that I could prove my innocence, but it felt cathartic to say the words. I still wanted Declan’s respect even if our friendship had been buried when I kissed Kade.

  “I shouldn’t have yelled at you, it’s not your fault my brother is a piece of shit.”

  I let the insult slide but needed to explain. “I wanted a date for Christmas and met a guy online. I didn’t know until last weekend that it was Kade and then we just—” Declan wouldn’t thank me for more details.

  “So, this is all fake? You and him?” Declan gawfed and gave me the eyes that stripped panties from unsuspecting women all over the state. “Baby, you should have called me. Everyone knew you were the one who got away. I would have given you the best fake date until the only thing fake would have been your denial. You should have called me.”

  I stifled a laugh, not the time or the place. “Dec, did I ever seem jealous?”

  “No.”

  “Because I never was. I’m sorry but there was only one Reiss brother I wanted to say ‘yes’ too, and he never asked.”

  “Until now.”

  “Look, it might have started off as fake, but until I read the letter, I promise you it was real. At least I thought it was real.” Unable to stay still, I got up to pour two glasses of juice.

  “Why were you looking for a fake date, anyway?”

  A reasonable question and my face burned in embarrassment. “For some crazy reason, I thought bringing a random home for Christmas would be better than listening to the pitiful comments about being single and not having someone who loved me.”

  We sat; the years of friendship stronger than the last hour of torment. Declan studying me for any sign of subterfuge or lie.

  “I’m sorry.” Declan finally leaned back, linking his fingers behind his head, owning the room as he always had. His anger disappearing to leave the friendship we’d somehow managed to hold onto. Despite his women and my silent crush on his brother. “I can go find him, and belt him up if it would make you feel better?”

  “Like you used to threaten any of your football mates if they wanted to ask me out?” I smiled, remembering.

  “I didn’t think you knew? Who told?”

  “At the time I didn’t care. I could hang-out with you and Kade without anything getting out of hand.”

  “Me and Kade? Even then he was more than just my baby brother.” Declan finally understood. “Shit, I’m so sorry for not noticing before now, and sorry for the way things turned out.”

  “I don’t know why I’m so surprised. I guess, once I realized the online guy was Kade, I wanted to believe—” I refused to cry in front of Declan.

  “Mum says to say ‘hi’,” Declan said as I returned to the kitchen and tried to salvage something from the burnt lunch. Not that I could concentrate on anything for longer than a handful of seconds. Some things in life could be saved; but the bread and my relationship with Kade were both destined for the same place.

  “You spoke to her?”

  “Apparently baby bro shared his secrets with mum while I was confiding in dad. They didn’t think to share.”

  “Now, it’s my turn to be sorry. I never wanted to come in between the two of you. I really thought you’d finally find a woman who wouldn’t put up your shit and force you to settle down.”

  “I did, she just fell in love with my brother.”

  “I’m not in love.” If I said it often enough, I’d believe.

  “Oh, Pia, take a look in the mirror. Better still, think back. Now, it’s so fucking clear that I should shoot myself for being so blind.

  “He followed us around like a love-struck puppy and any time the rest of us wanted to send him away, you’d insist he stay. At the time I figured you were being nice, but after listening to mum—”

  “He wasn’t that much younger than the rest of us. And he could out-tackle most of your football team.”

  “Yeah, it isn’t easy having a perfect brother.”

  “Tell me about it.” We both jumped as Kade appeared at the door of his own cottage. His eyes bloodshot and a bottle of bourbon already half empty. “Let’s play truth and tell, lay it all out on the bloody table.”

  “Perfect!” Declan sneered. “I’m trying to adult up and you
get smashed.”

  “You adult? Since when?”

  “Since every day of my fucking life. I’m the one who goes out and finds the lambs who didn’t make it through the night. I’m the one who negotiates the overdraft extensions with the bank. You might be Mr. Fucking Ten Percent, but I’m the one who’s been doing everything to make sure there’s still a farm for us to fight over.”

  “I don’t want the farm. Whatever mum and dad decide, we’ll undo it.”

  “I’m supposed to take you at your word? How about we ask Pia how much that’s worth?”

  “Dec, keep me out of it.” Terrified of one of them saying something that couldn’t be forgiven, I didn’t know whether to stay quiet or get involved. Either way, I didn’t want them to lose their relationship over me. I wasn’t worth it.

  “Impossible. You’re smack bang in the middle of it. How much do you trust Kade right now?” Declan asked, as cool as a cucumber and I couldn’t read where he was going with the question. A minute ago, we were back to being friends. I didn’t need him to push.

  “Don’t.”

  “Pia say it. An hour ago, you were dropping your skirt for him. Now, would you trust him to pick it up off the floor?”

  “Yes, of course.”

  “Would you trust him to cook you dinner tonight.”

  “I guess.”

  “With your life?”

  “I think so.”

  “With your heart?”

  “I—” My answer got stuck in my throat. I couldn’t answer. Not honestly. “Everything was supposed to be fake. Get my parents off my case about being single.”

  “Then why don’t you turn up with the two of us!” Kade slurred and I hoped it was only the alcohol talking. “Let them choose for you. The screwed-up agent or the screw-up and around farmer.”

  “Kade, please don’t.” I no longer had a choice about being involved. At least Kade let me take the bottle from his hand. “I want to understand.”

  We stood in the small space between the front door and table; crammed together with our suffocating history. Brothers. Friends and now lovers.

  “Pia, I’m sorry you got caught in the middle of this brother shit storm.” The last thing I expected was for Declan to be the voice of reason. “But if you think my brother is using you, walk away. If, for a single moment, you think this thing between the two of you is either to get the farm or get inside my head, walk away.”

  “And then what, dickhead?” Kade shoved his brother who, for once, didn’t retaliate. “She trades me in for you?”

  “I only ever wanted two things out of life.” Declan looked to me with no doubt to his sincerity. Or his pain. “The farm and this woman. If she’s happy with you, fine. But if you screw things up, then she knows where to find me.”

  The enormity of Declan’s statement hang in the air as he drove away and Kade reclaimed the bottle from the kitchen bench. He’d never been the one to drink. Declan and his crew, yes. Not Kade. Everyone’s favorite designated driver.

  “I don’t give a rat’s ass about the farm.” He said as plainly as ordering pizza.

  Kade lied, I knew he lied. He loved this land as much as Declan did. Otherwise, why keep this cottage filled with pieces of farming history. Old horseshoes mounted on the walls with plaques remembering their owner. When I’d been looking for a blanket in his spare closet, I’d had come across a quilt of ribbons from country shows celebrating the farm’s sheep and cooking. Kade’s grandmother had been quite the baker in her time. Winning ribbons after ribbons. Recipes handed down in a handwritten book I found next to the condoms in Kade’s bedside table.

  He loved this farm.

  He lied.

  Being with me was a way to steal the farm from under Declan.

  Our silent argument continued for the afternoon until Kade decided to take a break, leaving me alone while he had the rest of the bourbon for company. I curled up on the couch to watch the annual Christmas Carols on television. At least some Christmas traditions never changed.

  Like spending Christmas with family. As much as I wanted to be surrounded by my family’s love, the idea of walking in with or without Kade burned. Yes, I’d fallen in love with him. But—

  The lights from the television glistened off my car keys. Kade may have been drinking all day, but I was still stone, cold sober. I could drive away, be back in Sydney within hours and cancel Christmas. Three texts and my friends would understand the pact wasn’t worth it. The truth was, I’d be willing to pay for the whole bloody cruise as long as no one expected me to turn up and celebrate the future year.

  Or expect me to dive back into the dating scene any time soon.

  Kade.

  Damn him.

  Then again, didn’t I deserve one more day of make believe?

  Turn up with him by my side, making my parents’ Christmas dreams come true. At least that way, I could let myself drown in Kade’s pretense of being in love for one more day. Pretend to myself that this meant something, before manufacturing a break-up by New Years. No crime, no foul.

  The only alternative was to crawl back to Sydney to figure out how I could have been so bloody stupid as to lose my heart and then have it broken inside of a week.

  Kade

  If only my parents hadn’t issued their ultimatum.

  Did it really matter whether Declan got married or partied from woman to woman? The farm had always been my brother’s priority. No woman would ever compete with the solitude of spending weeks camped down at the back paddocks, or the smell of shorn sheep.

  Yes, despite what I’d told Pia, I also loved the farm. It had been part of who I was since before I could speak. But I lied because I could never explain that just because I loved the farm, didn’t mean I wanted to be a farmer. It wasn’t and could never be me. I loved the independence of being able to travel. To go on holidays. Not to be tied to the exchange rate or weather reports.

  All I wanted out of the farm were the couple of acres surrounding my cottage. And Pia by my side.

  If Miss M had been any woman other than Pia, I could have taken her home for Boxing Day, before making up some excuse for my broken heart early in the New Year. Enough of an act to stop my parents thinking I’d be walking down the aisle any time soon. I’d even had a cheeky thought that by the simple act of me taking a woman home, Declan would make a move on one of his regular bed-warmers and marry her by Easter.

  Easy.

  Except, Miss M had turned out to be my Pia. The whole email stuff should have been sorted and if it had been, well, she never needed to know. The harder I looked for the words to explain, the darker the night sky and the more I drank to try and find answers in the stars.

  Bloody Declan.

  My beautiful Pia had almost fallen asleep on my bed in front of the small television. Her cheeks still wet with tears by the time I sobered up and pulled together the courage to go back inside. Small blessings, hell I’d expected her to storm out and leave me to face Christmas alone. Not that I’d have blamed her.

  I’d screwed up.

  Royally.

  Her half open eyes watched as I found Grandma Cook’s old English teapot from the display cabinet halfway between the bedroom and the living areas. Carefully packaged and transported from England, the teapot was the only thing I wanted after she died. Memories of Sunday nights sitting around the table after dinner, each night made perfect by a pot of tea.

  One thousand conversations that would never have happened without staring into the brown liquid. These days, I only needed the smell of tea leaves for the same sense of calm. Feeling grandma’s presence and hearing her sage advice.

  You stuffed things up, boy.

  I imagined her saying as the tea steeped on the bench.

  Fix it.

  Yeah, but how?

  Love her or leave her.

  Grandma could have been in the room beside me, or maybe I’d found her in the bottom of the empty bottle.

  I love her, I always have.

 
“You stayed?” I didn’t mean for it to come across as an accusation, quickly trying to soften it with, “I’m glad.”

  Pia sat up in the middle of my bed to take the saucer, the full teacup rattling with my unsteady walk. Perhaps I hadn’t sobered up as much as I’d hoped.

  “I don’t know what to say.” I started the conversation when it became clear Pia wouldn’t.

  “There’s nothing you can say. You needed a deal to keep the farm. I’m the deal.”

  “No.” My head already hurt from the single cry. Tomorrow’s hang-over refused to wait. “If I wanted the farm, I needed a deal. It’s been a long day and right now I’m too shit-faced drunk to explain it so you’ll believe me, but I don’t want the farm, and you were never part of a deal.”

  “Whatever. I’ve got a new deal for you.”

  “I’m listening.”

  “You come for Christmas lunch and get my parents off my case. I go with you on Boxing Day and make a big scene that we’ve agreed to move overseas. That I could never be stuck living in the country. I’ll make your parents understand that any woman you would even consider marrying, would never want to live here.”

  “Do you?”

  “Do I what?”

  “Want to live overseas?”

  “No, well, I don’t know. That’s not the point. The point is I’ll give you and Declan a way out of this mess on one condition.”

  “What?” My heart sank and I knew without asking.

  “I never have to see either of you again.”

  “Sweetheart—”

  “Don’t, sweetheart me.”

  “Pia, then.” I regretted more than the bottle of scotch. Declan had it right, coming back and trying to talk. I should have kept a clear head and spent the day fighting for her, instead of fighting myself. “Today hasn’t been the day either of us wanted or expected. Can we talk about all this tomorrow?”

  According to the television set blaring away, the NORAD Santa tracker had left New Zealand, Santa was on his way to Australia.

  Christmas was coming but we were over. At least for tonight. Hopefully, tomorrow my words would form in the correct order, and Pia would understand.