Prisoner of My Desire

by Johanna Lindsey

  witness it? She could not, and Anne would not think to pretend 1 she did not

  know Rowena.

  ?Twas best she did leave, though ?twas maddening to know that she could do

  naught to help m?t her mother escape that place any sooner than Warrick couldat

  least not without detriment to herself. And as her help was in no wise

  guaranteed to work twas best left unoffered.

  But soon Anne would be freed. And Warrick would either send her to her dower

  lands, which she could hold closed to Gilbertthough he was unlikely to bother to

  try and get her back when he no longer needed her for a hold against Rowena or

  aught elseor Warrick would send Anne to Fulkhurst until this war was over. There

  Rowena would have a better opportunity to warn her mother not to know herat

  least not in Warrick?s presence. And they would be together again, finally.

  Chapter 44

  Warrick castigated himself for the hundredth time for giving in to his needs and

  sending for Rowena. It did not make it better, his seeing her. It had been sweet,

  so sweet, but his craving was now worse, for now he wanted to be with her more

  than everand she had been gone only two days.

  What the brief visit did, however, was make him determined to end this siege in

  a more aggressive manner. He increased the work on the two towers so they would

  be ready for the morn, and started work on two others. He sent out patrols to

  find him more boulders and heavy missiles for the mangonel. From the village

  were rounded up all large cauldrons to be packed with dirt and small stones for

  improvised boulders. He laid plans for a tunnel to be started if the attack on

  the morrow failed, though he had no miners in his ranks to oversee that last

  resort.

  That evening he inspected the finished wooden tower he would ride in himself. He

  meant to be on the top platform when it was pushed to the moat and tilted until

  it spanned the water and settled against the walls. Twould be on fire by then,

  for flamed arrows would be shot at it as soon as it was in range, so the whole

  process had to be accomplished with the greatest speed ere it became a fiery

  grave for those concealed within. But in being a shielded ladder, it still

  offered the most protection for those men he had picked to take the walls, then

  fight their way down to open the gates for the rest of the army. And he meant to

  be one of them, in on the first fighting, not the last.

  He was giving orders to have the two towers doused again with water when Sheldon

  found him.

  ?This ought to amuse you, Warrick,? he said as he dragged forth a very

  frightened, very wet woman.

  ?She claims she and her lady have caused half the castle garrison to sicken.

  This was done so that we can take the castle this very night, with little to no

  effort.?

  ?Is that so?? Warrick?s tone matched Sheldon?s for dryness.

  ?And when we leap on this unexpected though naturally welcome aid, I am certain

  to lose half my army in the trap.?

  His voice had turned to a growl ere he finished, and continued so.

  ?Do they think me a lackwit, to fall for such a common trick? And to use a woman!

  Get the truth from her, I care not how.?

  The woman burst into tears upon hearing that.

  ?Nay, please! ?Tis true what I claim. My lady bears no love for the new lord,

  and did despise his father. Ambray has been a prison to us. We want only to

  leave!?

  ?You found your way out, wench,? Sheldon pointed out.

  ?So could your lady. Why did you both not just go, instead of concocting?

  ?Because I need an escort to my dower property if I am to arrive there safely,?

  Anne said as she was brought up behind Sheldon.

  ?I thought to assist you in getting what you want, which appears to be Ambray,

  in exchange for that escort.?

  ?My lady, ye should have waited!? the servant wailed.

  ?Ye should not?

  ?Be quiet, Helvise!? the lady snapped.

  ?I had no patience to wait when that gate stood unguarded. And I would rather be

  here than in there, whether we are believed or not.?

  She was as soaked as her servant from having crossed the moat without the aid of

  a bridge, but she held herself regally despite the guard, who still clasped her

  arm in his rough grip. Sheldon stared at her in bemused attraction, for she was

  a comely woman, apparent even in her bedraggled state. Warrick stared at her

  just as bemused, for she seemed familiar to him, though he had never met her.

  ?So we are to believe you, lady, merely because you say ?tis so?? Warrick asked

  skeptically.

  Then Sheldon inquired ?Who are you, lady??

  ?Anne Belleme.?

  Warrick snorted.

  ?Belleme now d?Ambray.?

  ?Nay, I do not recognize that name as mine, since the priest did not hear a yea

  from me to consent to that forced marriage. ?Twas a farce that has kept me

  prisoner here for three years.?

  ?Then if you had the means to aid us to put an end to your imprisonment, why did

  you wait this long?? Warrick demanded.

  ?We did not only just come, lady. We have been camped here for thirty three days.?

  That Warrick was counting the days to know them exactly elicited a chuckle from

  Sheldon, which brought Anne?s eyes to him. She blinked to see that he was not as

  old as he had seemed at first glance. When he smiled at her, she blushed, for

  she did not find him unattractive. Nay, just the opposite.

  Warrick scowled at both of them for their sudden distraction with each other

  that was not getting him answers.

  ?Do you mind, Sheldon??

  ?Actually, I think the Lady Anne should be made dry ere you continue?

  ?There is no time for that,? Anne interrupted, ?The malaise that has struck so

  many of the garrison will not last beyond the emptying of their bellies. We did

  but add fouled meat to their dinner, which all have not eaten yet.?

  ?You still have not said why you would do this now,? Warrick pointed out.

  ?If you are Lord of Fulkhurst? ?? She waited for him to confirm it, which he did

  with a curt nod, then she explained.

  ?I was told horrible tales about you, so that I would add my prayers to others

  that you would not be successful here. But when I saw you had my daughter in

  your camp, and she appeared well and healthy, I realized I had been lied to.?

  ?Daughter?? He snorted.

  ?You think you have a daughter in my camp, lady? Well, you are welcome to look

  for her, but ?tis doubtful my men will want to give her up if you think to take

  her away.?

  What he was implying had her blushing furiously.

  ?My daughter is not one of your camp followers. I know not how she came to be no

  longer in Gilbert?s foul care and with you instead, for he made no mention that

  he had lost her. Nay, he took pleasure in telling me she had done everything

  that he?

  ?Is d?Ambray in the castle, then?? Warrick cut in impatiently, not interested in

  her family woes.

  She shook her head, bringing a foul curse from him and the gentle query from

  Sheldon:

  ?Did he escape??

  ?Nay. He had come here in the most horrid rage. I thought surely he must have

  lost another castle, to put him in so dark a mood. B
ut he stayed here less than

  a sennight, and in fact, left the day before you arrived.?

  That brought another foul curse from Warrick.

  ?Know you where he has gone??

  ?To court. His resources are so depleted, he cannot continue this war with you

  without aid from Stephen. But that has been tried before and is not like to do

  him any more good now than then, for the d?Ambrays have not been on the king?s

  list of favorites since Hugh sided against Stephen on some matter several years

  ago. Verily, in rescuing my daughter from Gilbert?s dutches, you have wrested

  her remaining properties from his control. Do you take Ambray, all r Gilbert

  will have left is one small keep in?

  ?Lady, I do not have your daughter,? Warrick interrupted in exasperation.

  ?Think you I would not make good use of Lord Belleme?s only heir if I had gained

  such a prize? As you say, control of her would deplete d?Ambray?s last resources.?

  ?I do not know why you insist? Anne began, only to frown.

  ?Can it be you do not know who she is??

  ?God?s blood, I have heard enough of this!? Warrick exploded.

  ?Sheldon, you deal with her.?

  ?That will be my pleasure,? Sheldon said, starting to laugh.

  ?But before you stomp away, why do you not ask her for her daughter?s nameor has

  it not occurred to you yet who this lady so closely resembles??

  Warrick looked hard at his friend, then at the lady. Then he became very still.

  He did not curse again as he saw why she was familiar to him, but his voice was

  as coldly chilling as it could get.

  ?So tell me, Lady Anne, what is your daughter?s name??

  She was not at all sure she wanted to answer him now. She had never seen anyone

  change so suddenly in appearance, to where he now lookedcruel. She took a step

  back. Sheldon put his arm around her shoulder, which was a great comfort, but

  still?

  ?Mayhap I am mistaken?

  ?Nay, you were not, but I was, to think I could trust that deceitful witch!?

  ?Why is he so angry?? Anne asked Sheldon as Warrick walked away from them.

  ?It was Rowena I saw, was it not??

  ?Aye, and you were correct also in thinking she did not tell him who she was.?

  ?If she did not, she must have had good reason.?

  ?I doubt my friend will think so,? Sheldon replied, but when he saw Anne?s

  anxious expression, he assured her ?He will not harm her. And he is sure to rid

  himself of his anger he is like to get rid of immediately by entering the castle

  now, whether he still thinks a trap is waiting for him or not. He is that angry.?

  ?But I did not lie. The postern gate is open and unguarded.?

  ?Then come, I will take you to my tent, where you can wait until this is over.?

  Chapter 45

  Rowena saw the two guards walking so determinedly toward her that she knew.

  Before they opened their mouths, she knew. They did not have to tell her. But

  they did.

  ?We have a message from Lord Warrick, Mistress. You are to abide in the dungeon

  henceforth.?

  She had known they would say exactly that; still she turned ashen to have it

  confirmed.

  ?Did hesay for how long??

  ?Henceforth,? was repeated.

  That, of course, was indefinitelyor forever.

  ?Did he say why??

  Stupid question. Why was she torturing herself?

  She had known this would happen if Warrick found out Gilbert d?Ambray was her

  stepbrother. She should have taken her courage in hand and told him herself when

  she?d had the opportunity. She would have faced his anger, true, but she would

  have been there to try and soothe it, at least to tell him why she had kept

  silent. Alone, he had concluded the worst, and now wanted naught more to do with

  her, wanted revengenay, this was not that. This was pure fury, and final.

  The guards had merely shaken their heads to her question, then directed her to

  come with them. She did. What choice did she have? At least she had been alone

  in the hall when they had come for her. Emma had not been there to protest, nor

  Mildred, which would likely have brought Rowena to tears. It was all she could

  do now to hold them back in front of the two guards.

  Aye, she had known Warrick would do this to herbut deep down she had not thought

  he really would.

  When the jailer she dreaded showed up with his leering grin to gloat that she

  was to be in his care again, Rowena turned her back on him ere she was sick.

  Twas not the babe making her feel so. Twas the tightness in her chest that was

  turning hollow. Now she wished the tears would come, but they would not.

  When John Giffard arrived not an hour later to tell her he had had to clout the

  other one this time to get him to leave, she had only one question for him.

  ?Are you here at Warrick?s behest??

  ?Nay, my lady. The word has spread fast that you were brought here again. I came

  as soon as I heard.?

  At that point she cried. Why John had been given to her the last time she did

  not know. She had never asked. But that he was not this time was self

  explanatory. Warrick did not care what happened to her now, as long as she was

  locked away where he would never have to lay eyes on her again.

  A while later she heard an argument out in the guardroom. She recognized Mildred?s

  voice. She and John had become very friendly of late. Just now they were not.

  When silence returned, Rowena knew John had won, knew also what the argument had

  likely been about. Mildred was not to be allowed to see her, nor would John go

  against his lord to let Rowena out.

  Two more hours passed, then John came again to open her door.

  ?He has changed his mind, my lady. I knew he would, but You are to be locked in

  his solar instead of here, with a guard at the door.?

  ?What if I prefer it here?? she wanted to know.

  ?You do not mean that.?

  ?Aye, I do.?

  John sighed.

  ?The guard has his orders. He will drag you from here do you not go on your own.?

  ?Then by all means, I shall walk.?

  ?Take heart?,

  ?Nay, John,? she cut him off curtly.

  ?Mine is dead now, for it hurts no longer.?

  God?s mercy, why could that not be true? She prayed for blessed numbness, yet it

  would not come with this much pain. But no one was going to know that, not John,

  and especially not Warrick.

  No hope came to her from the change in prisons. Warrick must have merely

  recalled that she was carrying his child. Obviously he had forgotten that in his

  first rage, and it must have enraged him more when he remembered and thus had to

  make allowances for her just to protect the child. She did not think for a

  moment that he had any other reason for moving her to a more comfortable prison.

  She was allowed to see no one except the guard, who handed her food to her each

  day. Every time she had tried to speak to him, she had gotten grunts or mutters

  in answer, so she did not try anymore. Verily, she would have preferred to stay

  in the dungeon with John.

  She sat often in the window embrasure, from where she could look out on the side

  yard. Not much activity ever happened down there, but ?twas a better view than

  none at all. She sewed a lot, too, for the child that was nigh three mont
hs

  along, soft chemises for Emmanaught at all for Warrick. What she had made for

  Warrick ere he left for Ambray she now ripped apart to make tiny tunics for the

  babe.

  No one had told her aught about the siege at Ambray. For Warrick to have learned

  the truth of who she was, he had to have taken the castle. Had Gilbert been

  there? Was he captured or dead? Was her mother all right? Free? In a new prison

  as a result of Warrick?s fury?

  She counted the days. For each one that passed, she stabbed a hole as deeply as

  she could with her small eating knife in one of the carved bedposts. They had

  been fine bedposts, richly detailed. Now there were twenty five unsightly holes

  that she took to admiring. Before the twenty sixth could be added, Warrick

  returned.

  Rowena had had no warning. He was just there, walking into the room, stopping

  before the window embrasure, where she sat with her feet propped up on the

  opposite seat, her hands on her belly, which was thickened, but not yet rounded.